Hello! I am charlie009d's typing monkey! I type her stories for her because she doesn't have internet. And I hate having to explain that every single time Charlie writes a new story. Anyways, this story is kinda crackfic-y. It's just kinda weird and sometimes doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Probably because it was written by three teenage girls at three in the morning. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this story!


Tony rolled over with a groan. He looked at his clock. It read 2:17 AM. A funny thing, really. He couldn't remember going to bed. The last thing he remembered was Ashley, a young blonde, arriving at his door, offering him foreign drinks. Now, he grabbed one of the drinks off his nightstand and took a big whiff of it.

"Roofies," he muttered to himself. Oh well. At least Ashley had been cute. Tony then realized his phone was ringing. Through sleepy eyes, he found his phone, and when he answered it, his gut twisted painfully. The usual calm voice he heard was laced with guilt and panic. Tony gripped the phone, hanging on to each word that was said.

"Tony…I murdered Alisa," Ziva said in a quiet voice.

"Oh, Ziva…" Tony whispered, more to himself than to her. Tony had been hearing about Alisa for the past several weeks now, but he never would have though Ziva would go to such drastic measures. He kept Ziva on the phone as he quickly got dressed and found his car keys.

"I'll be there in a few minutes, Ziva," Tony assured and then said in a stern voice, "Don't answer the door for anyone."

Tony was just climbing into his car when he realized running would be faster. He ran three miles across empty roads to Ziva's apartment without breaking a sweat.

When he arrived and knocked on her door, he received no answer. Panic began to swell in his chest. Without remembering that it was the middle of the night, Tony kicked her door down and rushed inside.

The horrific sight of Alisa's dead body greeted him. Her bleached hair was stained with blood, her blue eyes gazing blankly at the ceiling, her legs buckled underneath her, bending at awkward angles.

Ziva sat on her couch in the fetal position, crying softly into her knees. Tony slowly sat down beside her and put an arm around her. That startled her, and she punched him in the jaw. Then she realized what she had done. She didn't apologize because it was a sign of weakness, but she did kiss it to make it feel better. Tony smoothed her hair out and whispered comforting words into her ear.

"I cannot believe I did that," Ziva said.

"I know what will make you feel better."

"What?" she sniffled.

"A movie," Tony whispered." High School Musical 3, to be exact."

Tony pulled High School Musical 3: Senior Year out of nowhere. He popped it into the DVD player, then went and sat by Ziva. She leaned her head into the crook of his neck. She couldn't help but think how perfect it fit. Before she knew it, Tony's lips met hers. Deep down somewhere inside her, she knew that this was wrong, but she couldn't stop herself from kissing him back.

Tony's fingers ran through her hair, memorizing every strand. He was hypnotized by her beautiful brown eyes. A strange sound was coming from her. It took him a moment to realize she was humming. He pressed his kips to hers once again, and when they parted, he leaned so that their foreheads were touching and he began to hum with her.

"This is the last chance to get it right," Ziva sang.

Tony chuckled deeply. "My own Maria."

"Best Side Story."

"West," he said with a laugh. "West Side Story."

Ziva was feeling hungry, so she moved to her cabinets and pulled out a half finished bag of Chex Mix. Tony immediately grabbed a handful and shoved it into his mouth. After a second, he began to choke. Ziva caught him before he hit the ground. She cradled him in her arms, holding back tears.

"Please don't let this end like that musical."

Tony coughed. "Ya know, I saw a movie like this once."

Ziva laughed softly and pressed her lips to his. They didn't come up for air until their faces were almost blue. Tony couldn't help but feel great love for Ziva in that moment. Softly but slowly getting louder, he began to sing "I Feel Pretty". Ziva took his hands and slowly they kneeled down, and they began singing "One Hand, One Heart" together.

In that moment, what was left of the door burst open and Gibbs rushed in. he looked from the dead body of Alisa to Ziva and finally his eyes rested upon Tony, whose lips were just inches from Ziva's. he gave them a disapproving look and moved to Alisa's body.

"I know when my rules are being broken," he said, not looking at them. "Just remember rule #12. As for you, Ziva, I know you're the one who killed Alisa, but I can't be a hypocrite, so I'm gonna let it slide."

And with that, Gibbs threw the body of Alisa the cat out the window and into a nearby dumpster. Then he exited, leaving Tony and Ziva in each other's arms.


So yeah...weird, right? And yeah, there were a lot of references to West Side Story...we had written this right after we finished watching that. And it's just an awesome movie/musical.

Please review. I like reviews. Reviews are cool.