A/N: The hell is a life?

Search up Aquaman's Rousing Song of Heroism on youtube for the original video.

M'gann's shoulders still shook as she sat cradled next to Conner, tears streaming down her face as Conner fidgeted with his hands. Artemis, Wally and Robin were curled up next to each other on the couch across from them, putting aside their arguments for the sake of human comfort.

Kaldur came into the room, still dripping wet from his swim in the pool. His face was set in a strangely steely resolve, and he stood proudly between the two sofas. The team looked up when he cleared his throat, eyes still watering and hearts still throbbing.

"Team," their leader began quietly, "we must not let our crushing defeat get to us, my friends. Taking a beating is sometimes part of being a hero."

"Some heroes we are," Artemis muttered, turning away from the uncharacteristically invigorated Kaldur.

"POPPYCOCK!" the Atlantean screamed. "We must have HEART!"

The team stared at him in apprehension and worry. Since when did Kaldur—respectable, polite, calm Kaldur—scream "poppycock"?

"Superbreath can come in fire, frost, or just plain bad," Kaldur sang as he began prancing around the room.

"…what is happening," Robin muttered, eyes comically wide. "What is happening. What. What is happening."

"Shrinking's a power. But it's kind of sad. Shifting shape into a snake can give folks quite a fright," he continued dramatically, wrapping an arm around M'gann and Conner. They recoiled with frantic expressions, wondering what the hell had happened to their leader.

"But only your heart will win us the fight!" he boomed, leaping up into the air and ignoring the shrieks his teammates emitted.

"There's portal creation, and astro-projection; telekinesis and dead resurrection!" Kaldur continued, spinning in pirouettes around the room. "With mind control you're on a roll, and if you're lucky flight," he sang, jumping gracefully onto a table and knocking down a lamp.

"But only your heart will win us the FIIIIGHT! Who are you," he jabbed his hands at his cowering teammates as they shook in fear, "just a man or a superman? The man we turn to for the plaaaan!"

Kaldur pulled Conner up from the couch and swung him around in what appeared to be a dance. "Who are you, just a man or a superman? The man we need to take a staaaaaand!"

Conner looked as if he was about to piss his pants as he was dumped back on the couch.

"There's time travel, stretching and even wall-crawling. Sonic scream helps you with your bad guy brawling!" Kaldur sang out, apparently still oblivious to how scared his friends were.

"Fists of steel can make you feel an increased sense of might," the leader punched a pillow across the room, "but only your heart will win us the fiiiight!" Kaldur grabbed Artemis and Wally off the couch—Robin had somehow escaped and was watching from his place on the rafters—and hugged them close.

"Who are you, just a man or a superman! The man we turn to for the plaaaaaan! Who are you, just a man or a superman! The maaaaan we need to take a STAAAAAAAAAAAAND!"

Kaldur finished his song as he dropped his two teammates to the floor, spreading his limbs wide and crying to the skies.

There was a full minute of silence as the entire team stared at Kaldur with eyes wide as saucers.

"What," began Robin in a trembling voice. "Was that," Wally finished, clambering away from Kaldur and hiding behind Artemis.

Kaldur's face showed not a single hint of embarrassment. "It is Aquaman's Rousing Song of Heroism," he said calmly, surveying his teammates with a slight frown.

"…you don't look roused."

M'gann let out a little whimper and fainted.