I never intended to be gone this long, but life sort of took over. I had a kid, and oh my they take up every minute of everyday. But thanks to time, and her finally sleeping through the night, I am able to get some part of my sanity back. On that note, I have gone back and reread this story, which means I have edited it, but not so much that you must go back and read it. I hope to eventually go back and start all over with Lost Love, but I have a one year old, so I make no promises.

I hope you enjoy!

"I got your message." Lex said coming into a sitting room and finding Bray. It had only been a day since they had seen Ebony again, since their world seemed to have been turned on its side. They hadn't found the time to talk to each other alone since then, someone else always seemed to be nearby. So when Lex found a note asking him to meet Bray, he jumped at the chance. "So…?"

"She's alive, and well, and that's all that matters." Bray forced himself to smile. Seeing Ebony again was like opening the flood gates to everything he blocked off the morning he discovered her gone. He had gotten really good at pushing all those thoughts to the side, and focusing on the now. But now that Ebony was back, she was the now.

"She has a kid." Lex added, he wondered if Bray knew anything. Lex knew that before they were reunited with the Mallrats, Bray and Ebony were trying to start a family. But he wasn't the best at math, or adding, so he wasn't sure.

"Would you believe that was the first thing out of Amber's mouth?" he laughed. He knew there were a few times that Amber had wanted to bring it up again, but she had been respectful of his request to leave it be.

"Really?" Lex looked shocked. "I would have thought she would have been more up in arms over the queens return, than a baby that might not be yours." Lex was surprised. He knew that Ebony returning would challenge Ambers position in the city, a position she held dear to her.

"Zhara." Bray smiled at the thought of the little girl he head for a short time. "She's beautiful. Did you see all her curly hair?"

"Yeah, she looks like Ebony."

There was a pause of silence between them, while they separated the fake and real memories of the woman on their mind. It wasn't something that became easier, but a habit, like recalling a distant memory.

"Do we talk about it?" Lex asked the obvious question. He wasn't sure how to go forward on the subject of Ebony, but he knew that Bray needed someone he could talk to. There had been so many times over the last year that he had seen that far away look in his eye, but he had never been able to get much out of him.

"I'm not sure how long she plans on staying." Bray sighed. "We didn't have much of a chance to talk, at all."

"That's something we should find out. It has spread through the city like a wild fire already. Everyone knows some version of the story, of her return. Questions are being asked, if you need the excuse to go."

"I'm not sure she's returned." Bray looked at him. "Every part of me wants to sit here and talk to you about Ebony, about the Ebony that we remember, real and fake. But then I feel like I am betraying the city by not talking about what else is going on."

"Zoot." Lex nodded. He understood. Bray had always put the needs of the city before his own, it was what the city kids loved about him so much, and Ebony had been the opposite, which they also loved.

"My brother is alive, alive and crazy." Bray shook his head. "I just, I don't understand. I mean I was there, we pushed his body out to see, set it on fire and everything."

"Maybe it's a knock off?" Lex asked. "Someone pretending to be Zoot? There were enough crazy people in the city at the time, any one of his lackies would have known the story well enough to move on a play him elsewhere, someone left from The Chosen."

"I thought about that too, but the way Mackenzie described him, the way he was before he became Zoot, not a lot of people in the city knew that side of him. Ebony, Trudy and myself, maybe Jeffa, but we know for sure that he is gone. So, I'm just not sure what to think." Bray told him, finally feeling some relief. He couldn't talk to Amber, she wouldn't understand, not yet. But Lex seemed to understand, he got that Bray could go from thinking about his brother to thinking about Ebony in seconds.

"You could always see about seeing him for yourself." Les shrugged. "Maybe find out where he's at and go see for yourself. That way you would know, and then we all would know."

"Was it wise of me to offer them protection so quickly?" Bray asked suddenly.

"Without a doubt." Lex nodded. "Ebony wouldn't have done it. You would have, you did the right thing. You always do, don't doubt that." Reminding him of that was something Lex had done a lot of when they first defeated the Techno's.

"She would have kicked us out, huh?" Bray laughed, a real memory coming back to him. Ebony threatening a very pregnant Amber and him, banning them from the city.

"Without even blinking. You're lucky she's a little nicer now." Lex laughed.

"I just can't believe she's back." Bray smiled thinking about the way she looked, the shock that seemed to freeze them both when they first saw each other.

"Yeah, and I'm still trying to figure out why you're still here and not out at the farm already." Lex told him shaking his head.

Bray knew that at some point he would see Ebony again, but he hadn't truly thought about the fact that he had the power to see her again sooner. The farm was a short journey away. He could easily go out there and see her, see Zhara, and speak with Mackenzie. He knew in some ways Lex was smart, and always smiled brighter to himself when Lex proved that.

MWMWMWMWMW

"She's back?" Trudy stood frozen over the sink. Her hands covered in soap bubbles, mouth popped over looking over her shoulder at Amber, who sat at a table behind her. "And you're just now telling me?"

"It's all over the city Trudy, how have you not heard yet?" Amber laughed.

"I haven't been out. Brady's been sick, and I've been too busy cleaning up vomit to worry about the whispered conversations."

"Oh no, did she catch get BJ's cold?" Amber questioned. Her oldest son had been sick a few days before.

"Most likely, those two are thick as thieves. But its pay back for when Brady gave Martin that fever." Trudy laughed. "But don't try and change the subject, Ebony, is back, with a baby?"

"Are all of Bray's ex's going to return with children?" Amber sighed. Ebony's return was starting to feel a lot like Danni's but with a lot less answers to questions that stayed unspoken.

"Firstly, I don't think he has any other ex's for you to worry about. And secondly, are you sure the baby is even Bray's?" Trudy asked drying her hands to join Amber at the table. She knew this conversation was going to need all of her attention.

"He said she didn't know, and that's it." Amber shrugged.

"Okay, where has she been? Jay? The others?" Trudy asked.

"He didn't say." Amber rested her elbows on the table top and her chin in her hands.

"Did they speak?" Trudy asked.

Amber shrugged.

"He didn't say?" Trudy asked. "What did he say?"

"Nothing." Amber finally told her. "I meet with them all, they wanted to ask for protection, but Bray has told me nothing."

"And his memories?" Trudy asked. "Are you two talking about them?" she didn't often ask about Bray's memories, no one did, because whenever asked, he tensed up and stalked off. They all eventually stopped asking, and Bray became their old Bray.

"He hasn't said." Amber gave a sad look. It was hard for her to think about that year, the year without Bray. Because Ebony had left, she never really had to think about it much. Bray never spoke to her about Ebony, or their year together. "He didn't sleep much last night though, so I knew its effecting him."

"Have you tried to talk to him?" she wondered.

"I can't force him to talk to me about it, about any of it. Plus, it's more than just Ebony being back, and having a baby."

"More?" Trudy laughed. "How could there be more? That itself is pretty major."

Amber chewed on the inside of her bottom lip. The only thing that Bray and her had talked about was telling Trudy about Zoot. They had agreed that she needed to know it was a possibility that he was alive, and they agreed that Amber should be the one to tell her.

"Don't tell me she's moving in here!"

"No, at least I don't think so. I don't really know what they are doing. As I said they are looking for protection." Amber shifted in the chair. She knew that Trudy hadn't caught that when she said it earlier, but she was hoping it was be a natural lead into the news.

"Protection? Ebony and Mackenzie?" Trudy shook her head. "Are you sure they aren't planning something? A take over?"

"No, I don't think so." Amber said. "Trudy, Mackenzie believes that Zoot is alive, and looking for her and Ebony."

Amber watched as Trudy took in what she was saying, her eyes unblinking, head tilting to the side, her mouth hanging open.

"Did she hit her head?" Trudy asked after a long moment of silence. "She must have lost her mind."

"Trudy, I don't think so. Bray doesn't think so." Amber reached for her hands. "Trudy, from what we've been told he's alive, and still spreading the message of power and chaos. He was the driving force behind the Technos. Or at least that is the information Mackenzie has supplied us with."

"Okay." She nodded her head, taking in the information. "Okay. And they are seeking protection?"

Amber wasn't entirely sure how to explain this part to Trudy, but she did her best to recap the story Mackenzie had shared with them.

"And Bray just agreed?" Trudy looked shocked. "Why would he agree to bring chaos back into the city? Things are calm, perfect."

"No matter how we look it, they are basically mallrats. We can't turn our backs on them, on anyone." Amber told her. "We really don't know much. Mackenzie got panicky and took off, Jay and Ebony followed her back to the farm."

"And no one has bothered to go after them and find out more?" Trudy asked. "I have questions, and I don't agree with Bray."

"Trudy, he's the city leader, or king, whatever term you want to use, it gives him the right. And after you think about it, you'll agree too." Amber knew that she was Trudy's voice of reason. She could see her getting ready to fly off the handle, and she was one of the few people that could defuse the situation before it blew up.

"But, Zoot, he can't. Bray can't." Trudy stood up and started to pace along the table. "Brady! What about Brady!"

"No one is saying that Zoot is coming here, and we don't even know for sure if it's really Zoot. Mackenzie wasn't here, she never saw Zoot, only heard the stories." Amber stood up and stepped in front of the pacing girl. "Stop Trudy. You need to breathe. Nothing is going to happen to Brady, or you." She put her hands on the woman's shoulders, bringing her back to reality.

"Okay." Trudy nodded. "Yeah, okay."

"Now, let's sit down and talk through all your questions." Amber guided her back to the chair before sitting back down across from her. She knew that Trudy was going to ask questions, and need someone to keep reminding her of the facts. It was going to make for a long night.

MWMWMWMWMW

Mackenzie continued her silent conversation with Paul, keeping an eye on Honesty who was sitting on the couch braiding a bracelet. It was just after lunch on the farm and she had found it hard to talk with Paul openly. Honesty or Lane were always close by, and Ebony kept popping up, and Mackenzie was doing her best to avoid her.

"Mom." Lane said, running in through the open front door, Aden right behind him.

"That's me." Mackenzie said smiling at him.

"We made you something, come look." Lane said tugging on her hand, pulling her back towards the door.

"Okay." Mackenzie laughed, following him out of the living area, and into the yard.

"Whee." Aden said clapping his hands.

"It was Ved's idea, but he let us do most of the work, well me really, because Aden is still too small to use the tools." Lane rushed, trying to get out every detail he could.

"Ved and tools? Now I'm scared." Mackenzie asked, looking around the farm as they walked, worried what might be coming.

"Look, over at the tree!" Lane pointed, there was a large wooden yard swing hanging from the old tree, Ved standing behind it, watching as the group got closer.

"I have to admit, that is pretty cool." Honesty smiled at her little brother.

"Isn't it cool mom?" Lane shouted, sitting on the swing. "It's super strong, sit down."

Mackenzie looked at Ved for a second, unsure if she should, unsure if she should thank him.

"Take a seat, they want you to be the first one pushed." Ved smiled, holding the back of the swing.

Mackenzie took the seat next to Lane, and Honesty sat down on the other side of Mackenzie.

"Alright, we're ready!" Lane shouted.

"Just relax." Ved whispered, before giving the swing a slight push.

For a second Mackenzie braced herself, ready to fall to the ground, but it didn't happen. She felt the air swish past her face slowly, not moving fast or far. And Ved's whispered words seemed to flow through her, and she could feel herself relax into the swing, enjoying Lane's laugh, and Honesty's smile.

When the swing came to a stop, Lane hopped back down and looked up at it. "That is so cool." He was amazed with the work they had done. "Can we make one to go higher, faster?"

"I bet we can." Ved laughed.

"Alright, Aden's turn." Mackenzie smiled getting up, she watched as Aden climbed up into her seat next to Honesty, and Lane got back into his.

"You three ready?" Ved asked, before giving them another gentle push.

Mackenzie watched their faces, before glancing up at Ved and mouthing the words thank you. It made every part of her feel light to watch Lane and Honesty smile, real genuine smiles, give real laughs, and having honest fun.

"Let's go find Lucie, she'll love it!" Lane said hopping off the swing, and helping Aden climb down.

"I wanna tell Paul." Honesty said hurrying towards the house.

"Don't run." Mackenzie shouted after her.

"I can't believe how good Lane is with Aden." Ved laughed, watching as Lane walked along with the three year old boy. He went to the other side of the swing, and sat down.

"He's just good here, the farm is his home." Mackenzie said glancing back at Ved.

"It's yours too." Ved said smiling at her, waiting for her to sit down. He could tell that she was nervous, scared to sit next to him. She had avoided him since the night in the hall.

"I make a home where ever I go." Mackenzie said smiling at him, and sitting down carefully on the swing.

"If you leave, where will you make your next home?" Ved asked.

"When I leave." Mackenzie corrected him quickly. "And I would rather not talk about it."

Ved nodded his head and looked down at the ground. "So you'll go back to him?" he asked after a moment.

Mackenzie jerked her head over to look at him, staring at him scared, unsure of what he had just said, if she had heard him right. "What?"

"You'll go back to him, Zoot, when you leave here." Ved said slowly looking up at her, seeing the horror displayed on her face. He could see the panic and confusion in her eyes. "You'll leave them, you'll leave me again, for him."

"How?" she barely whispered.

"Does it matter?" Ved asked.

"How?" Mackenzie nearly screamed at him, pushing off the swing, tears filling her eyes.

Ved looked out over the yard, Lane and Honesty, both close to the house, stood frozen from hearing her, the other's were coming out of the house and barn, looking to see what had caused the sudden outburst.

Mackenzie couldn't make herself look towards the house, towards the others. She could feel the tears coming on stronger, the fear, the guilt, everything she had been holding back. She used to be so good at keeping her emotions in check, keeping the feelings she didn't want anyone to see at bay, but he had brought them out of her, from the moment at the beach, right up to this point, she wasn't able to keep things hidden from him. Keeping her back to the farm, she walked away, she started off slow, just a few steps, but it didn't take long before she broke out into a full sprint, she needed space. She couldn't be near him, she couldn't face Lane and Honest while her fear and guilt were taking over.

"Mom!" Lane shouted.

"Mackenzie." Ved said, calling after her.

"Mom!" Honesty shouted, as she started to run after her, trying to get to where she was.

"Honesty, no!" Jay shouted, running towards her.

Ved watched as the girl ran past him, but she didn't make it more than a few yards away before she fell, face first onto the ground, her body jerking violently.

"Honesty!" he shouted, running towards her as Jay passed him.

Jay stopped and rolled the girl over to her side, pushing the weeds down around the girls head.

"What happened, what's going on?" Ved asked.

"Give her space." Jay shouted, putting his arms out to keep the others back that were making their way towards them. he glanced over to where Mackenzie stood, frozen in spot. "She's having a seizure."

They watched as a small body twitched and jerked until she finally went still.

"Someone hurry and get Paul." Jay said "We need to take her inside."

"Okay." Ved said, picking Honesty up carefully, as the other reached them, Lane continuing on, to where Mackenzie was.

"Mommy!" Lane said running to the back of her, his arms going around his waist.

Mackenzie could feel her whole body shake as Lane hugged her, she wasn't sure if it was from him breathing hard, or from her own sobs.

"Mackenzie." Jay said coming around her, in order to face her. He wasn't sure if he had ever seen her cry like this, not even when she was scared. "She's okay, it only lasted a few seconds. Ved took her inside."

Mackenzie could feel her legs wiggle, almost like she was going to lose her balance. Those words felt like a knife in her heart, and staring up at him only to feel the strong anger come over her. Before she could even think about the little boys arms around her, she pulled her fist back and punch Jay's face as hard as she could. She felt Lane, and herself stagger back a little, and she caught herself in the middle of a curse word, bringing her fist up to her chest, looking at the bleeding knuckle. She couldn't remember the last time she had thrown a punch.

"The only person I didn't want to know, and you told him." Mackenzie sobbed, letting her knees finally give and falling to the ground. It was easier for her to hold Lane, this way. The young boy looked scared, unsure of what was going on around him, what had happened to his sister, or why his mom had just punched Jay.