Hey guys, chapter two is up! I originally wanted to post this chapter as a new story, because the title 'Never again' doesn't exactly fit this...but the ideas are pretty similar so this is why I put them together. Anyway... Read, enjoy and review! :D I'd also like to brainwash you people to read my other story, The TomandKunit Chronicles and review that, too :D

Tulip Jones stared at the man before her. He was tall, blonde and handsome, with deep set eyes and a few worry lines hidden underneath his fringe of hair. He was muscular with broad shoulders, his suit looking as wonderful as ever on him. He looked amazing; the kind of head-turner on the streets, walking confidently to wherever his destination was. This man was one of the best agents they had ever had. No, the best. After all, John Rider had already died.

This was Ian Rider.

She didn't know how she fell for him, but slowly, she found herself feeling excited and happy every time they talked; how she felt the urge to hug him close when he complimented her (casually of course, with no hidden motive, unfortunately), and how she caught herself more than once observing his lips from faraway. Yes, she was in love with him.

Yet, she knew she couldn't be with him. She has lost her family; she knew how it hurt. Yes, she knew someday Ian Rider would die too, and leave her behind. Everyone did at some point. In this business, you never lived old enough to retire. This was why they never bothered to mention pensions and retirement ages when recruiting.

Now, Ian Rider was in Blunt's office, discussing his latest issue- finding a permanent housekeeper for Alex, his nephew. She pitied the poor boy, having no idea who his uncle worked for, having no idea that his uncle wasn't who he thought he was; and having no one there permanently to love and care for him. This was why she agreed to schedule this meeting for him. For Ian and his nephew.

Blunt, however, agreed to this not because he had taken their feelings into account, but it was because with a permanent housekeeper, Ian could go on more missions without that Rider boy constantly plaguing Ian's mind. Ian was going soft, and Blunt didn't like it one bit.

They had settled on a certain applicant who went by the name of Jack Starbright. She was shocked to see that it was a girl, but then, she never really understood Americans. She had noticed that Ian was much relaxed than he was before, and after every mission, he was more eager to go back. She had dismissed it as worry for Alex, but this carried on even as Alex could take care of himself. She knew it wasn't just because of Alex. It was also because of Jack.

She had followed Ian home one day, to see if her suspicions were true. That Jack girl was so oblivious to Ian's affections- if you could call that affections, that is. Getting a smile out of a spy took a lot, especially if it was genuine, and she was surprised to see Ianlaughing at some joke Jack had made. Her heart sank. Ian loved Jack. He wouldn't love her. She was MI6 after all.

The changes in Ian were starting to catch everyone's attention. He had been really depressed when his brother and his wife had died, but now, he was smiling at everyone who acknowledged his presence. This soon spread like wildfire, and everyone wanted to know what had changed, but of course, Ian denied any relationship whatsoever. It was true, of course, Ian never did openly declare his love for Jack. He knew the risks, and contented himself with simply enjoying for company, and gazing at her from afar. Not like she noticed anyway.

Jones was different. She was desperate. She wanted him. She was heartbroken that the American could do so much good to him, and her, only ruin his life further because of her job as the deputy head of MI6. Sometimes, she would wonder what god she had pissed off to deserve such fate, but she had sent so many agents to their deaths, so that must be a lot of gods and ancestors and family members she had pissed off.

Then, the Cornwall mission came. After the briefing, Ian had called her outside for a talk. Her heart raced- did Ian secretly love her and came to tell her? But it was all just wishful thinking, and all her hopes were dashed when she saw him holding a letter. Addressed to Jack.

"Tulip," he started, "I have this feeling my luck might run out this time. I just have a gut feeling."

"Then why go?" she asked, on edge.

Ian raised an eyebrow. "I have a duty to my country. Herold Sayle, in my opinion, is planning something big. I know it. This is why, in the event of my death, which shouldn't really come as a surprise to you, I want you to give this to Jack." He placed the envelope in her hand, but did not let go just yet.

"Please."

His voice cracked, much to her surprise and his embarrassment. She nodded solemnly, and Ian retracted his hand.

"On your honour?" he asked. She mentally smiled. The Riders always used this tactic to get people to promise them something.

"Om my honour."

In the end, Ian did really die. She wanted to cry when they lowered the coffin, but she couldn't. She would look soft, and everyone would suspect her of loving Ian. She would only cry when she was alone.

Somehow, she forgot the letter, until she came home from the funeral. Curious, she opened it. There was a letter and a photograph inside.

Dear Jack,

I'm really sorry for leaving you like this. I've expected this, really, and was surprised I lived so long. It's true, I'm not a banker. You were right, I do work for the government as a spy.

Mrs Jones raised an eyebrow. She had guessed?

I still remember that time when we were watching that James Bond movie. You told me that I was tall, handsome and mysterious. You asked me if I was a government spy. I said no.

I felt really bad for lying to you about everything. But I meant what I said about everything else. I meant it when I said there was a woman in my life that I loved very much. I told you she was the sunshine of my life, one of the few reasons that kept me going, besides Alex and my own will to survive, and of course, the Rider luck. You were interested to meet her and kept bugging me to tell you who she was.

Well, I'll tell you now.

Her throat went dry.

It was you.

She couldn't stop the tears rolling down her face.

It was you whom I loved. You changed me. After my brother's death, I was really depressed, and was only ever truly happy when I was with Alex. Then you came along.

I'm not sure how I fell for you and why, but I started to be happy again. You were always there when I needed someone, and I didn't forget all those times when you would come into my room in the middle of the night to see if I had left on yet another 'business' trip. I would have such a fright, thinking that I was in danger, and scare you into screaming ''Uncle! Uncle! I give!" until I let go. It still makes me laugh sometimes. I had another reason to live for- you.

I lived for you, Ian, she thought.

I know it sounds very cheesy, but it was true. My colleagues, fellow spies at MI6, noticed the change and grilled me on how I picked myself up again. I just smiled and responded with: Classified.

Mrs Jones let out a bark of laughter.

If I wasn't talking about such a sad topic, you would probably laugh and tease me about my sense of humour. I will miss yours.

And I'll miss yours.

My father Adam died without regrets, having married and fathered two children before dying on a mission. But I do have regrets. I regret leaving Alex at such a tender age. I regret not doing enough for both of you, and having to lie to you about everything concerning my work. I regret not declaring my love for you in person, but we both understand the risks. So, I apologise. I really hope you'll forgive me.

I won't forgive you, Ian, for leaving me like this.

It'll be quite hard for you to do so, I think, as I reflect on everything that's happened to me, you and Alex. I wasn't a good uncle to Alex, much less a fatherly figure. I wasn't even a good admirer. Yes, you got my jokes, but you never thought of them as affections. Spies are not affectionate, do that was the most I could do. It wasn't enough.

If you did that to me, Ian, it would be more than enough.

I'm writing such a long letter to you, Jack, because I don't want to stop. I'm thinking about you right now...and I don't want to stop. Not now, not ever. But I know I must go sooner or later, to a mission that might cost me my life. I have never written a letter to you before a mission before, because I was always confident I would return…more broken and battle-weary, but alive. Now, I am not so confident.

I swear to god, Jack, when I die, I will close my eyes and think about you and Alex, and pray that you will be alright.

I am praying very hard now, that I'll return to your chiding, warm smile and Alex's laughter and witty remarks.

But I don't believe it one bit.

I'll end off with three very cliched words that can never be used enough:

I love you.

Love,

Ian Rider

The letter fell to the floor. Sobs racked her body as she looked at the photograph. It was of him, Jack and Alex, smiling into the camera. Ian had an arm around the each of them, and looked happier than he did in years. On top of him and Jack, Ian had drawn a nice heart. She could have laughed at the sentimentality, if she didn't feel so hurt and empty now.

The letter and photograph never reached Jack, but she had passed it on to Alex after her death. She didn't want to see that look on his face ever again.

That showed just how much her honour was worth.

Oh Ian... I loved you, but you never loved me.

I will take my love for you to my grave.

I hope you and Jack have finally found peace in heaven, and solace in each other's company.

Oh god, it's so cheesy -,- A different side to Mrs Jones and Ian! Who did you guys think he was?

Like it? Don't like it? Either way, review! I thinking of ending it here because I can't think of any more one-sided pairings... But if you guys have a suggestion, don't hesitate to tell me :D I'll still put this story as 'in-progess' for a couple of months first, just in case.

I also have a whole lot of other ideas for other fics, so I might write them soon! Look out for them! :D

Thanks, and don't forget to review!

-Syd

P.S. I've read all about