A/N: I have something special for you! BUT, you must wait until the END of the chapter, mostly because I don't want your screen to be filled with BOLD TEXT before you begin reading.
Warning: Do not read this Chapter until you have read 'Just Another Wicked Parody' or you will be extremely confused. Extremely.
Just Another Wicked Parody
Encore
Chapter 1 (or 22)
Bows.
…
Authoress- Alright, Maggots! Line up! We have a few things we need to talk about and get into order as soon as possible!
Celestial Voice- After a long pause, the Authoress notices no one moves.
Fiyero- Since when are you the narrator, huh?
Authoress- COME ON, PEOPLE! By all means, move at a glacial pace, you know how that thrills me.
Celestial Voice- Since you're mama, Fiyero.
Fiyero: Why I otta…
Authoress- I mean NOW! Move it! Good God you people are slower than a hoarse, barefooted, beaten up, old jackrabbit stuck in molasses on a hot sunny day in winter in the middle of El Paso with the sun beating down hard on the back of its…
Elphaba- (Coughs) Ahem.
Authoress- neck, and everything smells like molasses because it's slowly dripping down into the drain pipe that leads down to the sewage, causing everything to…
Fiyero and Elphaba: Ahem!
Authoress: And it's all just one big mess…and it causes update delays on fanfiction and fictionpress to be-
Cast- AHEM!
Authoress- What?
Doctor Dillamond- We don't have time for your shenanigans, just say what you need to say so we can go home!
Boq- (Singing) Say what you need to say! Just say what you need to-
Fiyero- I thought that was rather aptly put, Doctor-
Elphaba- (To Dillamond) YOU'RE ALIVE?
Doctor Dillamond- …no…
Fiyero- (Cough) Liar. (Cough)
Professor McGonagall- That is a very serious accusation Mr. Tiggular!
Fiyero- (Angsty teenager scoff) Like I care.
Elphaba- I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE ALIVE! (Launches into slow motion hug sequence)
Fiyero- (Blocks Elphaba.) HEY!
Elphaba- What?
Fiyero- I thought you loved me!
Elphaba- I do, but…I thought…
Celestial Voice- She's two timing you, Tiggular.
Fiyero- (LE GASP)
Elphaba- No, I do not, that is a total lie! LIAR!
McGonagall- That is a very serious accusation-
Fiyero- Elphaba, you know stories where the girl loves two men but can't choose never ends well! Just think! There's the story of Cleopatra, Mark Anthony, and Julius Caesar, Phantom of the Opera, and most of all: Twilight.
Boq- But, I liked Twilight.
Elphaba- We're not romantically involved at all, Yero!
Fiyero- Don't think using my nickname against me will do you any good. I know you! And what about the 8 foot rule?
Elphaba- (Tries to push past Fiyero)
Fiyero- NO! YOU'RE BELLA AND I AM EDWARD! YOU CHOOSE ME OVER HIM, NO MATTER HOW GREAT HIS ABS LOOK! (Points to Dillamond) UNDERSTAND?
Elphaba- You're Edward, huh?
Fiyero- Yes!
Elphaba- (Squints) There's only one problem with that.
Fiyero- What? I'm handsome?
Elphaba- No, you're not sparkly.
Fiyero- Well, neither is the Goat, so that's all good. Like I said. I'm Edward and he's Jacob so you have to choose me no matter what comes up.
Elphaba- (Squints) Actually, the Goat is sparkly! Look!
Authoress- That's weird…
Doctor Dillamond- Well…this isn't awkward at all.
Fiyero-( Seethes)
Doctor Dillamond- It's uh… new shampoo. Cullen brand. It was on sale.
Boq- OH! I have that too! Doesn't it smell good?
Fiyero- This…is…SPARTA! (Attempts to kick Doctor Dillamond off stage, forgetting he is made of straw)
Celestial Voice- What is wrong with you?
Doctor Dillamond- (Stares at Fiyero for a moment) Oho. Scary.
Elphaba- (Pulls Fiyero into a hug.) Calm down, everything will be just fine. Breath. Take deep breaths. Everything will be okay.
Fiyero- (Sobs uncontrollably.)
Cast with the Exception of Elphaba and Fiyero- (Pointing) VIOLATION OF THE EIGHT FOOT RULE!
Authoress- (Swoons) What? Did you guys say something.
ElphabaROCKS- (Looks at Authoress with a smug look) I knew it. I knew you'd like romance eventually.
Authoress- (To ElphabaROCKS at first) You were right. I was…less right. I decided to revoke the 8 foot rule, by the way. Besides, how can we have a proper set of bows when no one can touch each other? ALRIGHT MAGGOTS! LINE UP! Elphaba, Glinda, Fiyero, go last. No one cares about the rest o' yah. Just get in line.
Glinda- EW! What are those? (Points to a line of white squiggling pills)
Fiyero- (looks up) Oh! Tic-tacs! My FAVORITE! (leans over to pick one up)
Elphaba- No! Don't touch those. These are Maggots.
Maggots- (Scream.)
Fiyero-(Draws back) Ew.
Glinda- (Scream.)
Maggots- - (Scream.)
Glass- (Breaks.)
Fiyero- (Screams) WHY ARE WE SCREAMING?
Audience Member- MY EARS!
Authoress- NO! Stop that! Bad cast! BAD CAST! Alright! Here, everyone just get in a line! Don't step on the Maggots though. I don't think they'd like that very much.
[Fiyero and Elphaba happily join hands and get into line]
Boq- Miss Glinda…
Glinda- No. (Squeezes in between Elphaba and Fiyero) Just no.
Nessa- (Reaches up and grabs Boqs hand) Hi. (Smiles)
Celestial Voice- It's like herding cats.
Authoress- Come on Peeps! We promised bows! Lets see some bowing! GO GO GO!
[Unnamed Cast Member plummets off the stage, screaming in terror.]
Fiyero- Um… did anyone else see that?
Friend of Unnamed Cast Member- Yeah, he has a few issues.
Elphaba- Sounds like a personal problem, he should get that checked out.
Audience Member- MY EYES! MY EYES! THEY BURN! THEY !
Elphaba- This is ridiculous.
Glinda- Very dramatic.
Audience Member- THEY BURN!
Elphaba- Why don't you just apologize, Glin?
Glinda- NEVER? What for?
Elphaba- Don't you remember?
Glinda- No?
Elphaba- You hit him in the eye with a script in the first chapter in act one. Someone called you Gildna or Gladidna or something of that nature and you tossed the script into the audience, hitting him in the eye. It was a traumatic experience for everyone.
Glinda- Oh yeah.
Elphaba- So why don't you just-
Audience Member- MY EYES!
Elphaba- Apologize.
Glinda- No.
Elphaba- Yes!
Glinda- No!
Elphaba- YES!
Audience Member- MY EYES! THEY'RE BURNING ME! THEY !
Elphaba- REALLY? WE HADN'T NOTICED!
Glidna- OKAY! Okay! I'm…I'msorry,
Audience Member- What?
Glinda- I said Iwassorry
Fiyero- You were soggy?
Glinda- SORRY! I AM SORRY! I, GLINDA UPLAND, APOLOGIZE!
Audience Member- Oh, okay. Apology accepted.
Authoress- Just like that?
Audience Member- Yeah, it didn't actually hit my eyes anyway.
Cast- O.O
Fiyero- Wow.
Authoress- Why can't we ever stay on track? It makes me so upset every time. Why can't we just bow? Can it really be that hard? Everyone just joins hands and takes a bow. Is that too much to ask? IS IT? Because I don't think so!
Fiyero- We'll we can do that right now. (Gets between Elphaba and Glinda, taking their hands. Everyone else follows his example.)
Authoress- (Stares for a moment.) Umm okay. (Gets in line with Audience Member) Lets… bow. We're bowing now. Just like that. Bowing. We're bowing.
[ Starting with Elphaba and Fiyero, the joined hands raise into the air and then fall down past the knees of the characters on stage until everyone comes back up, their hands raised high once more.]
Authoress- (To actors) NOW GET OFF MY STAGE! (Turns to audience, plastering on a fake smile) Thank you and Goodnight!
A/N- And now we come to one of the main purposes of this last chapter. I just wanted to thank so many of you. I've been working on this parody for a good two years of my life. It's been fun and I've discovered some new things. has been wonderful to me and every one of my readers and reviewers offered so much support. Who can say if I've been changed for the better, but I have been changed…Oh, Lordie ain't that the truth? (I'm so glad spell check doesn't accept 'ain't'! Doesn't that just make your day?) It's funny to look back and see how my view points have changed through the two years and how much (or how little) my writing has changed. Again, I really just wanted to thank you! OH and the Wicked Awards! I realized that I had been nominated again this year and I did win last year (I believe two awards, but I may be wrong there) in any case, this parody has been nominated twice and won once for best parody. You have NO IDEA how much this means to me. I really appreciate it, and I'm touched at how much you guys enjoyed it.
Feel free to drop a PM in my box any time I will answer that day and I will be happy to talk about whatever is on your mind!
Thank you!
Reviews are Funny, aren't they? Funny little things they are.