Jace walked past Clarys rooms door. He just walked by and didn't look behind, even he would have wanted to do that. But Clarys' soft voice made him stop:

"Jace?" Clary asked.

Jace took a deep breath and retraced his steps. Now he stand in the doorway and looked Clary straight in the eyes. Everytime he saw Clary, he could just wonder. They were so different from each other. And still they were siblings. That was what tore his heart apart. He could not truly touch her anymore. At least not here, not under everyones suspicious look. Not here, where it was ugly, dirty and forbidden to love your sister like you would love your girlfriend. But Jaces' love for Clary was much deeper. Clary was his soulmate. Clary opend her mouth but didn't say anything. She were hesitating and Jace waited patiently. He did not want to make her feel uncomfortable. Clarys' eyes were full of agony. Jace wanted to to run to her, keep her body close to his and never let go. But he had to stay away. Finally she talked again.

"I love you, you know?" she asked again. Jace was happy when he heard those words. He was sorrowful when he heard those words. And he was angry when he heard those words. He was happy, because Clary loved him black. He was sorrowful, because he knew they could never be togeter as a couple. He was angry to ther parents, who had ripped Clary and him apart and caused this painful situation. It would have been so much easier, if Clary would have hated him, if his feeling for her would have made her sick. He wished they would have never met. But he knew deep down inside, that that was a big lie. He could never wish something like that. He was still silent and just stared Clary.

"I love you so much," Clary said and her eyes begged for help. Jace could not hold himself back anymore. He almost run to Clary and sat next to Clary. He took Clarys' hand into his and holded it tightly.

"Shh, I know it, Clary, I know it. And I love you too, much more than anything else," Jace whispered those fatal words but did not regret them. He didn't regret any minute he had spend with Clary. He regreted and feared those moments, when he was not by her side. Clary sighted and was avoiding Jaces' look.

"Jace... You know we can't be anything more than... You know it is forbidden. It's not... I would do anything so we could be together as a normal couple. I would do anything so we could be more than siblings. So we could love with no hindrance. But you can't change your family. We are siblings, same blood runs through our veins. That is the fact. We can't change it," Clary said quietly. Jace squeezed her hand even more tightly. Clary bit her lower lip so she would not burst into tears and shook his hand away. Jace looked her disapointed.

"We could run away to some place there no one would know us. We could start over again," Jace said. His voice was hopeful and Clary could not stand that tone. It made her much sadder.

"But we would know. As much I wanted to run away, it would not be the right thing to do," Clary answered. Jace jumped up. Clary could sense how furiois he was. And how hurt. They both had broken hearts but could not heal themselves. And they couldn't even help one another.

"What the hell then is the right thing to do? Do I disgust you? Do my feelings for you make me sick?" Jace almost shouted. Clary trembled. She could not keep her tears away longer.

"Jace, please...," her voice was fragile. Jace walked to the doorway and stopped there. Clary looked at his back, which was covered with tight, black t-shirt. One lone tear fell from her eye´.

"Maybe we could try to live like normal siblings. We really should put our feelings aside," Clary said. Jace didn't answer immediately.

"Yeah, as if it would work," Jace said bitterly and Clary knew that it was the truth. She would probably never stop loving Jace. And putting feelings aside would not make anything better. It would not heal anything.

"I should leave," Jace said, but didn't sound that bitter anymore. Now he sounded just really sad.

"I'm so really very truly sorry," Clary whispered. Jace was silent one heartbeat.

"It's not your fault, so you should not apologize," he said and walked away from the doorway. When Clary could not see him anymore, she lied down on her bed. Tears fell like pouring rain from her eyes. No one could make her feel better. The empty feeling inside of her was slowly tearing her apart.