AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is pretty much a follow-up to one of my other fics, The Truth About Death The Kid.

Ed Elric hates auto-mail, even though he himself uses auto-mail. Ed Elric also hates irony.

Ed Elric accidentally created Terminator when he came up with a prototype for a full-body auto-mail.

The Chinese ideogram for Ed Elric depicts the heaven above, with a metal arm and leg.

Ed Elric saved Colonel Mustang from choking on a pretzel by punching him in the throat. Ed had no idea he was choking.

E = Ed Elric2

Ed Elric doesn't need a weapon. He is one.

Don't ever call Ed Elric just "Ed." One guy did, and he was shot a few days later.

Ed Elric actually sang the FMA: Brotherhood theme song out loud in the English dub. This is not a joke. He actually sang it.

God wonders if Ed Elric is human, because he certainly never created him.

There was a time when Ed Elric wasn't awesome. That time was called "Never."

If at first you don't succeed, don't try to bring your dead mother back to life. Ed Elric tried that, but at least he got cool auto-mail to compensate.

Every time Ed Elric uses alchemy, an angel gets its auto-mail.

Ed Elric does not breathe. He holds air hostage.

The difference between Ed Elric and God is that Ed Elric has awesome auto-mail.

When Ed Elric tells time, time obeys.

The truth will set you free. Ed Elric will set you on fire.

Ed Elric is like Spider-Man, but instead of a radioactive spider, Ed was bitten by a radioactive god.

When God said "Let there be light," Ed Elric said, "Say 'please.'"

The only thing that gets between Ed Elric and Colonel Mustang's face is Ed's fist.

Ed Elric still doesn't know that Fullmetal Alchemist is just a TV show.

When life gives Ed Elric lemons, he makes orange juice.

Ed Elric was named after himself.

The fatalities in Mortal Kombat are recreations of eyewitness accounts of Ed Elric responding to being called "runt."

If Ed Elric were a Star Trek: The Original Series character, he would be the Enterprise.

Kill one man, and you are a murderer. Kill millions and you are a conqueror. Kill them all and you are Ed Elric.

Everything Ed Elric knows about chimeras is false.

Ed Elric knows the way to Sesame Street, but refuses to tell anyone.

Ed Elric likes his meat so rare, he only eats chimeras.

Ed Elric can drown a fish.

Ed Elric is the SI unit of awesomeness.

Most people fear the Grim Reaper. Ed Elric considers him "a promising rookie."

Ed Elric turned God into an atheist.

In a fight between Naruto and Death The Kid, Ed Elric would win.

No man is an island, and neither is Ed Elric. He's what you call a continent.

When Ed Elric kills homunculi, they stay dead.

If Ed Elric had a dollar for every man who's called him a runt, he'd have $729,875. If he had a dollar for every one of those men who lived, he would have $0.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: R & R!