Author's Note: I'm returning to the world of fanfiction and I've brought gifts! I've been gone for some time but recent health issues (stupid auto-immune disorder) has caused me to drift back because, hey, there's nothing else I can do! Merlin has recently peaked my interest so we started off there. Keep in min this is my first ever Merlin story so please let me know what you like and what you don't.
As for this format...I read a story like this once, a pairing each giving their own take on the prompt and I wanted to give it a shot.
Disclaimer: If I owned this do you really think I'd be posting it here?
Two Halves of a Whole
1. yellow
His eyes always glow the most intense yellowish gold when using magic. At first all it caused was fear but soon seeing his eyes change like that made me feel calm and, in a way, powerful, simply because I knew he was at my side.
His hair always is always an enchanting yellow in the sunlight. Leaving me to once again bask in his presence...not that I'd let him know that...prat.
2. red
He always looks good in red. Always. Its sets off his dark eyes and hair I think. I noticed it when I first bought him that stupid red neckerchief. That stupid thing also was a contributing factor to why I insisted all of his sorcerer robes had to have some form of red on them.
Seeing that crimson liquid spilling out from between his fingers caused instant panic to settle in my stomach. My head began to swim and nausea settled in. As he stumbled toward me I felt my world ending. I was supposed to protect him. defend him. See that he became the king he was meant to and now...now...I had failed. I ran toward him as he gasped out my name. I felt my eyes fill with tears and hurried to his side, whispering his name...only to have the prat burst out laughing and toss a blackberry into my mouth. "Found a whole bush of them across the stream. You should have seen your face! I can't believe you fell for that!" Still don't know if I fully forgive him for that.
3. table
It was worth it. Despite the fact that I will never be able to look at that table the same way again. It was worth it. It was his fault entirely. If he hadn't been giving me coy looks through the entire banquet (which he now denies) I wouldn't have needed to pin him down to said banquet table and show him exactly who his king was.
Though my head throbbed for days after and every time I moved too quickly I got a dizzy spell it was worth it to see the concern on his face after I tripped and slammed my head on the corner of the table. I don't like to worry him. I really don't, but it is nice to know that he does truly care every once and awhile. Plus having him laying next to me on his bed, running sword-rough fingers gently through my hair was a feeling I rather enjoyed.
4. heat
Feeling that delicious heat spread across my entire body as we arch up against each other is...addictive to say the least. Knowing that he is mine and nothing is going to change that. Knowing that no matter how bad my day was, he is there to provide support and strength and compassion and guidance and, on occasion, an opposite point of view. Knowing that at the end of the day everything will fade away as passion takes over and we relax into each others embrace.
I get cold easily. Arthur is always teasing me for it. He, on the other hand, simply radiates heat. During the winter months there is nothing better then falling into bed at night with him curled up against my back warming me just enough to lull me to sleep.
5. pain
I watched as the pain from his chest wound caused his eyes to gloss over and restrained myself from running to his side and interrupting the healers work. Knowing he had taken the knife for me, that it was my fault made me feel ill. The bastard had been sent to try and kill me. Even if he had managed to land a blow on me, the angle he was coming fro would have hit me in the arm, not even close to a killing blow. Merlin just had to leap in front of me and take the hit...missing his heart by inches. And now I was forced to watch him lay there in pain while I sat by unharmed.
I wince as Arthur applies more pressure to the slit on my wrist, effectively stopping the bleeding. "What have I told you...no blood magic! Its hurts you, it weakens you, and I hate watching you in that state! I don't care who's protection its for. I'm forbidding it!" Despite seeing the pain in his eyes from seeing me like this, weakened and sore from using magic that drains me, I knew I couldn't agree. If it came down to it, I would do whatever it took to keep him safe.
6. suffering
I'm suffering. Dying possibly. That really could be the only thing wrong with me. And I say so. And he laughs. Laughs! Well...chuckles a little actually. He looks at me and shakes his head, "If you hadn't drank so much last night you would fine. You won't be getting much sympathy from me." I glare at him half-heartedly before groaning and burying my head back into my pillow, "I'm suffering and you don't even care!" I hear him sigh as he settles next to me on the bed and gently rubs my back in soothing circles, "Get some sleep. I'll handle what needs to be accomplished today. You rest until you feel better. If you need anything send for me." I grab his wrist before he can rise, "Stay. That's an order." I can almost hear his smile as my Court Sorcerer settled back under the covers and began running his fingers through the base of my hair in that way he knows puts me to sleep, "Yes Sire."
My eyes fade from gold back to their normal color and I see the hate in his own eyes. "Traitor! Monster! How could you!" He shoved me hard and I hit the ground, not willing to fight back. I stayed silent. "I thought you were my friend but you're a monster! I never want to see you again!" I shut my eyes slowly, allowing tears to leak out and say nothing, suffering in silence.
7. angst
Looking at him locked up in the darkness his cell, knowing that he's a...magic user...its causes a deep set pain inside me I've never felt. I put him in there. I caused the deadness in his eyes. There is no fire. No Merlin left in him. Part of me hates him...but most of me hates myself. For hurting him and for never seeing...and a very small section of myself, so small I wonder if it is real, hopes that I can make this right, hopes that my father was wrong, if only to relieve the angst in my soul. And so I speak, "Merlin"
I se him mourn his father's death, as we all do and it hurts me. Nothing pains me more then him in anguish. And knowing that he blames magic, blames a part of me he doesn't even know I have, makes me feel angst in a way I never know I could.
8. joy
Watching him lay on our bed, mouth moving silently as he absorbed the book he was reading made me grin. His eyes moved quickly across the pages and his fingers ran themselves through my hair as I rested my head in his lap. I allowed myself to succumb to the feelings of contentment and joy.
The first time he pressed his lips to mine I felt...joy, like I never had before. Pure unbridled joy. I had felt feelings for him that were more then friendship for some time and to know, finally that those feelings were returned was...glorious.
9. rain
I remember once, long ago when we were still children, I went on a hunting trip. We got caught in a terrible storm and in our rush to set up camp I slipped and rolled my ankle. Nothing serious but very painful. When we returned the following morning I was sore, wet, and in a terrible mood. Merlin instantly set up a hot bath and had warm food and clothing waiting for me. Upon hearing how I hurt myself Merlin said nothing, just fetched me more blankets. No teasing comment about my clumsiness like I would have said if he had been the one to fall. Just compassion. Looking back it was the first time I remember truly realizing how compassionate my Merlin really is.
I always look forward to rain. Storms in particular. When the rain is pouring down, thunder crashing, lighting flashing, fire going in our room, there's nothing more comforting then reading by candlelight under a warm blanket with Arthur by my side.
10. sunrise
I don't usually like getting up early. I enjoy just lying in bed and sleeping until I absolutely have to rise. However, there's something addictive about waking up to watch the sunrise. Seeing the light spread across dark hair and pale skin stirs something possessive in me.
Laying in bed all morning isn't a luxury I can usually afford. Especially now as Court Sorcerer. I've trained myself, through years of being Arthur's manservant, to rise early in the morning, just before sunrise. Of late however, I've been pretending to sleep because I enjoy the feeling of him watching me as the sun rises before falling back to sleep for a bit longer.
11. beauty
Whenever someone mentions beauty I always picture Gwen. You would think that I would picture Merlin. To me he isn't beautiful. He's...something that doesn't have a name. He's just...mine. He's what I see when someone says happiness or home.
Gwen once told me beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. And I agree. Because Arthur, no matter the situation, be it early in the morning with tousled hair, or sick, pale, and fairly disgusting, he's beautiful to me. Beautiful and mine.
12. different
From the time I was a young child it was instilled into me by my father that I was different, superior. I was their prince, their future king and I demanded their respect. When Merlin came along and challenged that view of myself it threw me. I wasn't sure where I stood anymore. I never let it show but it...confused me. He showed me that while I may be different I was still equal to those around me, not above. Years later, ruling as King Arthur of Camelot I try and keep that in mind.
Being born with magic always set me apart from others. I was different and people fear what they don't understand. I was ridiculed, I wasn't an outcast but I was painfully aware that I was different. When I finally got to know Arthur I realized that he felt it too. He knew he was different, he knew others saw it as well. And in that, we were the same.
13. light
I watched Merlin move to the head of the battle, eyes glowing and called my knights to fall back. They did as they were told and we watched, exhausted as our sorcerer turned the battle in our favor. Light slowly began to spread from him as he chanted quietly. I had seen him help us in battle many, many times since becoming aware of his magic ability but it still never failed to awe me. Seeing the power and strength that flowed from him, knowing that it was for me, humbles me still. As our opposing side fled for their lives and disappeared into the distance my knights cheered. Merlin turned and walked back to us, faltering every few steps from exhaustion. My protective side kicked in and I swung him up behind me on my horse, allowing him to rest for the journey home.
I stood back and observed Arthur train his knights. From my position the light shining off his armour cast a glow around his face, showing off his sculpted features. I stood along the castle wall in the shade, staff in hand and watched my king, friend, and lover easily bring Gwaine to his knees in a mock duel. He pulled our friend to his feet before turning and looking to where he knew I was and grinning. I nodded my head in response and leaned against the cool stone, enjoying watching him.
14. taste
I licked a trail along Merlin's neck, enjoying how he gasped in pleasure, "You taste good." He arched against me and I return to sucking and nipping at his collarbone and neck. He gasped out my name and I pressed him against the wall, slipping my hand under his shirt to fondle a nipple. He groaned out a please and I allowed my hand to slip lower into his trousers to press against his hardness. His head fell back and I smirked, "Feel good?" I felt his hand press against me and groaned myself before dragging him to the bed to finish what we started.
I licked along the length of his cock, enjoying his taste. Arthur groaned above me and swallowed him fully. I felt his hand weave itself into my hair and tug as he thrust his hips shallowly. I hummed softly and he moaned out my name. I brought my hand up to press against his balls causing him to cry out softly. I continued to tease him before hollowing out my cheeks and sucking hard. Arthur groaned my name once before arching and releasing into my mouth. I swallowed and was pulled up only to be kissed hard before he dropped his head against my shoulder and sighed, "I love you."
15. ache
Watching Merlin watch his mother be buried after her death was painful for me. He normally has such a vibrant personality and it seemed dulled and listless. I had what seemed to be a permanent ache in my chest as his eyes closed, a single tear rolling out. I couldn't fix this situation and it angered me.
'He looks entirely too smug', I decided. He was sitting, eating his food, talking to his knights, and giving me a look that was far too smug. The ache in my lower back wasn't debilitating, it was more of a constant reminder of that morning when he had pinned me to his bed when I came in to make his bed and help him dress. "Prat," I muttered to myself as he called me over to join them, "But my prat."
16. unbridled
I watched as Merlin unbridled the horse he had used from our latest ride across the land to find more knights to sit at the Round Table and frowned, "You need a horse." Merlin gave me an odd look and before patting the horse on the neck and ushering him into his stall. My frown deepened, "I mean it. When we ride into a village or into battle I want people to know who you are. I want you to have a horse that speaks of you being my sorcerer...I don't want you using whatever horse is left over." Merlin sighed and my frown turned to a grin, "Its decided then. I'm going to find you a horse."
I unbridled Moonlight, Arthur's mare, and sighed to her, "What am I going to do with him girl? He's gone through every one of my magic books trying to find me the perfect horse. He seems to think nothing but a unicorn will do. I'm fine riding whatever horse is available." The horse nudged my side and nickered softly, "I'm going to have to let him have his way this time, aren't I?"
17. lost
I watched as Merlin entered the cave and felt my stomach turn. He had explained it all to me...some kind of magical right of passage. He had to go into this cave and do...something...I didn't fully understand what he said but I knew it was dangerous. He hadn't tried to hide that from me. I knew that once he entered that cave there was a chance he wasn't coming back out. My stomached turned because he could be lost to me forever.
Arthur's eyes fluttered opened, he groaned and I felt dizzy with relief. Three days he had been feverish from a poisoned knife wound, three days of not knowing whether he would pull through or succumb. He turned his head to look and me, "Wha-" I stopped him before he could continue, "The knife had a poison on it. Three days...you've been near death for three days. I thought I lost you."
18. child
I ran into Merlin's class, excited and axious to tell him what I had found. The minute I entered the children, Merlin's students rose and bowed. I turned to them, "Its fine. Don't get up...errr...all rise...you don't need to bow. This won't take long. I just need to borrow Merlin for a moment." My sorcerer gave me an exhasperated look but joined me at the back of the room. I thrust the book in his face excitedly, "I found it! You're horse. These! They're called...Aroins-" "Arions," He corrected. "Yes, them. They're related to unicorns and are swift and powerful. We're going to find you one of them."
I approached Arthur determindly, "I want to start teaching. I want to teach children how to use magic. How to control their magic. If anything would prove that you don't share your father's belief on magic and those that use it, that you accept it, this would. Children are our future. I want to help shape that future in any way I can. I want to show them white magic, good magic. Please."
19. challenge
I hate it when any of my knights are challenged. I hate it even more when Merlin is. I knew that risks were inevitable when I made him Court Sorcerer. It doesn't mean I like it. Its mainly dark wizards now. I know the odds are in Merlin's favor every time but it doesn't stop my stomach from knotting itself. If I could I would forbid him from ever dueling again. That wouldn't be fair though. Knights enjoy being challenged, its a testiment to their strength. He never says it but I think Merlin enjoys dueling as well. It lets him "stretch" his magic so to speak. It doesn't mean I like it. Every time some wizard comes in and challenges my Court Sorcerer I feel my stress grow a little more.
Its always a challenge to restrain myself around him lately. His own fault. He's just too damn attractive for his own good. Ever since his kissed me I feel addictted to him. The way he smells, the way he looks. Everything about him. He needs to stop being so...Arthur.
20. anger
I rarely felt true anger toward my father. He was my father and my king. The one and only time Merlin was flogged was one of those rare times. I remember sitting in Gauis's chambers, watching as he cleaned the wounds on my manservant's back, hating Uther. Hating him for doing this to my friend for what seemed to me to be know valid reason. I had seem servants flogged before, flogged to a much worse extent but this infuriated me in a wy I had never felt before. There were only five lashes, maybe six. A minimal amount compared to what most servants get. The wounds were shallow and Merlin was still conscience but I felt like I could go out for blood on his behalf. I ran my fingers through my servant's short, black hair as he cried out softly when pressure was applied to the deepest cut and vowed to myself to never let this happen again.
I feel anger. Everyone does as some point or another. I try and not let it affect me very often. When Arthur is injured or in danger that unspoken rule for myself is broken. I know I can be terrifying when I am really angry. I rely on it. My eyes glow dark gold and I seem to have a dark, menecing edge to myself. In that anger I can always feel my dark side, the side that wants to use magic for my gain, for dark, push against their retrainsts and push me to protect the one I love more than life itself