A/N: This story is from my Montage of Sirius, based off Machine, by Josh Groban. It was reader requested to become a story, but I've opted for oneshot. Hope you enjoy!

-C

Rachel couldn't believe him. After all the things they had gone through, after all they had experienced together, he couldn't even look her in the eye and say he loved her. He had the audacity to tell her she was crazy for feeling all those silly things, but she was sure she wasn't crazy. Was it so wrong to fall in love? Everyone was supposed to fall in love. They might all find their own path, but then she thought, Sirius just kept going in circles, girl after girl in a vicious cycle, and she had become one of those. Did he even have a heart?

He was always so careful when they had sex, so careful not to make it seem like more than it was, but she had fallen anyway. And what was wrong with it? Half the girls in Hogwarts professed to love him, but she really meant it. Ah, well, Lily had been right, Rachel had made a big mistake in thinking he had substance, in thinking she could change him. She had been shagging him for months, and if she couldn't get him to say it by now, he never would. Did that mean he didn't feel it, or that he just didn't say it?

And then, it hit her. Sirius Black had no heart. The Blacks really were a bunch of heartless jackasses. She had thought that was a myth, but even the Black Sheep had no heart. She had spent all this time falling for him, spent all this time feeling all these things that he would never be able to feel. She had wasted all this time thinking she could change him, but there was nothing to change. He didn't have a heart, he would never be in love, and she felt like an utter fool.

"Rachel?" she heard from outside the curtains. Lily was out of the shower. "Rachel, dear, you can't sulk forever. You can't let him win. You have to reenter the real world at some point."

"I know," she croaked. "How about next year?"

"That's not funny," Lily insisted. "You're a strong girl. Sirius Black, he's nothing. He was never good enough for you to begin with."

Rachel didn't answer. She didn't feel like that was true at all. She felt as though she was nothing and she was never good enough for him.

"Lily, please," she sighed. "Please don't make me do this. I'll get up tomorrow, but not right now. I just can't face the 'I told you so's' and the 'I knew it's' and those triumphant stares from his fan girls. It's not about him anymore. It's about my pride."

With a heavy sigh, Lily pulled back the curtain and stared down with a look of pity that made Rachel cringe into her mattress.

"Rachel," she whispered, sitting down beside Lily, "he's not worth this. I won't say a thing. Please believe that it'll be okay."

Rachel shook her head. That was a lie, and judging from Lily's voice, she didn't believe a word of it either. Even Lily was itching to say that she had told her so.

"Fine," Lily sighed. "I'll take notes. Would you like me to bring you something to eat?"

"No," Rachel whispered. She didn't feel much like eating.

"How about I check on you at lunch and see if you've changed your mind?"

Rachel shrugged. She wouldn't have changed her mind, but saying so would just make Lily worry even more. Lily left and Rachel began to cry, wondering all the while why shouldn't just get over it. After all, she knew there wasn't much loss there. Sirius wasn't worth her time.

But knowing it, believing it, and acting accordingly were incredibly different things. He may be completely heartless, but she still had loved him, no what he was.