To anyone who doesn't watch The Big Bang Theory, I highly recommend it. If this adaptation intrigues you at all, you can at least look up the scenes I based this after on YouTube. The video is labeled Sheldon's Greatest Christmas (minisode) and yes, I borrowed the name for this story. To fully enjoy it, you have to see the whole episode, but you can enjoy the video plenty, as well as other 'minisodes' featuring Sheldon.

Spock's Greatest Christmas

It was a typical 'morning' on the USS Enterprise. No, it was a little better than typical; it was fast approaching the annual Federation Winter Holidays Celebration. It was a bundling of all the major Federation holidays that fell within the winter months. They were mostly Terren, and the majority of said Terrans celebrated Christmas, but there were other races with wintertime holidays. It would be the crew's first aboard the Enterprise.

As a Vulcan, Spock had no intention of truly joining the festivities. The eating, drinking, and gift-giving associated with the holidays were a foreign concept to him. He'd never made attempts at 'shopping around' to find gifts for people. He had not done such a thing for Nyota in the time they were dating. She had understood that he viewed the custom as illogical and had not attempted to get him gifts either, simply being satisfied with his acknowledgment of things like her birthday or holidays. He had followed a similar pattern with his mother.

If there was anything he did look forward to about the holidays, it was the overall good 'vibes' that came from the people around him. Most of the crew had made peace with the fact that they were far from home, but made plans to send messages or gifts to their friends and family planetside or on other ships. And there were also many people talking excitedly about their shore leave which, to the excitement of many, was located on Risa for the holiday season.

Spock was currently teaching Nyota more about his lyrette, something she'd expressed interest in during the early days of their acquaintance. She was just beginning to learn some of the more complicated songs, which was impressively advanced for a human. As she held the instrument and followed Spock's instructions, a chime came from their shared bathroom door.

"Come." Said Spock, knowing it could only be one person. He was partly right; Captain Kirk stepped through the door holding a brightly colored package, roughly the size of a padd, but he was followed seconds later by doctor Leonard McCoy, who looked as dour as ever.

"Hey Spock." Said Jim, as he kept insisting he be called. He paused as he saw Uhura there. "Oh, you're busy. I'll come back later." He turned and started to leave.

"What is that you are holding, Captain?" Asked Spock stopping him. Jim turned back and Spock could see him fighting the urge to tell him to just call him Jim.

"Oh, it's your Christmas Gift. I'll just stick it back on the pile and give it to you later. I've got one for you to, Uhura." He added, speaking past Spock to Nyota. She looked surprised and a little wary. No doubt she was concerned that the Captain had chosen a gift for her that was inappropriate. Spock might have felt a similar concern over his own gift if he'd been able to get that far.

"You have a gift for me?" He asked, surprised. Jim grinned at him.

"Yeah, it's always been a pretty important tradition in my family."

"But why would you give me a gift? You should know that as a Vulcan, I would consider such a practice illogical even if I did celebrate any kind of gift giving occasion." Said Spock. Jim's smile faded a bit.

"Uh, I did it because it's Christmas, and we're friends? Sort of?" Spock stood up and stared at Jim, who was looking less sure of himself by the moment.

"Perhaps you see this as a friendly gesture, but as I said it is extremely illogical. When one is given a gift, it is the social expectation to reciprocate by gifting another with an item of matching or close value and sentiment. In my admittedly limited experience with human gift giving, the majority of such gifts among friends prove to be of very little practical use. All I am truly receiving from you is an obligation."

"You don't have to get me anything in return. I just thought you'd like this." Assured Jim a little desperately, thinking he had the solution to Spock's problem. But Spock continued on.

"Indeed I do. As an alien surrounded by a predominantly human crew, the social rules of the dominating faction force me to return the gesture."

"Geez!" Snapped Jim, looking angry now. "If you feel that way about it, then I just won't give you anything! Would that help?"

"Don't feel too bad Captain." Offered Uhura. "I made the same mistake when we first started dating. I must say though, it's a lot funnier when it's not happening to me!" Jim glared at her, but his attention returned to Spock as he shook his head.

"I am already aware that you have already purchased me a gift. I see the gift with my own eyes, and my name written on a stereotypical holiday elf sticker. To withdraw the gesture and dispose of the gift would be even less productive than purchasing it to begin with."

"I'm so sorry." Muttered Jim sarcastically. Spock didn't seem to catch on to it.

"It is my own fault for being so fascinating and desirable as a friend to you that you were forced to go to such lengths to attempt to earn that kind of affection from me." He turned to face Uhura. "I would appreciate it if you accompanied me to do my shopping." Turning to McCoy he added, "You are most welcome to accompany us Doctor, as you know the captain better than anyone and know his tastes well." McCoy turned to glare at Uhura.

"Whaddya know, it's happening to you, and you've dragged me into it!"

Hours later, the three of them found themselves in one of Risa's many shops. Like nearly all of Risa, it was totally decadent and rather wasteful. It had everything ranging from expensive candies to risqué clothing to explicit pornography. It all ranged in price from cheap to outrageously expensive. Spock looked around the shop with a feeling of frustrated helplessness.

"I see nothing the captain would be interested in." McCoy looked at him incredulously.

"Are you kidding me? This whole damn planet has 'James T for Tomcat Kirk' written all over it. Any of these things would be a great gift for him."

"He's right." Remarked Nyota, looking around the store with a shadow of the disdain Spock felt visible on her face. "The captain could probably happily spend the rest of his life here." He saw McCoy send her a half-hearted glare. As a close friend of the captain, he disapproved of any negative talk about him, even though in this case it was probably the truth. Nyota ignored his look and continued speaking.

"Anything here would make a good gift for him. Just pick something, though I'd draw the line at pornography. That could be weird, even to Jim Kirk." She looked around quickly and selected a large bottle of liquor. "How about this? Kirk was drunk when I met him; he'd probably appreciate a few drinks to blow off some steam."

"That suggests that the captain carries an unhealthy amount of stress." Remarked Spock.

"Trust me, he does." Snapped McCoy. "He deals with you every day, and any time you get like this and we all do. Just buy him the damn booze!" He looked past Spock to an Andorian female standing behind the checkout counter waiting to see if they would actually buy anything. "We're ready." He told her.

"We are not." Retorted Spock. "Let us assume that this is indeed an appropriate gift for the captain. If I choose such an item from this shop, or a similar one, there is an additional factor to consider; what value? As I am unaware of what the captain spent on his gift to me, I have no certain way of purchasing a gift of close reciprocal value. Which one do I take, if any of the selections of alcohol here?"

"This one, now let's buy it and go." Said Uhura urgently.

"You have given that selection absolutely no real consideration." Accused Spock, knowing just how eager she was to leave.

"You're right." Said Uhura, adopting a look of thoughtful contemplation briefly before repeating herself. "This one!" She looked past him to the Andorian, who was beginning to look a little impatient. "We're ready."

"No." Said Spock firmly. He then turned to the female. "Perhaps you could help us?"

"Of course." Said the Andorian courteously, stepping out from behind the counter to do so. Spock stepped up to her.

"If I were to present this bottle of alcoholic liquid to you as a gift for a special occasion, what kind of relationship would you expect us to have?" The Andorian waved her antennae at him in a confused manner.

"I beg your pardon?" She asked.

"Here." Said Spock, handing her the liquor. "Now, what sort of relation would you expect to receive such a gift from? A colleague, or a friend? A family member or a lover? What feelings might such a gift evoke toward me?" The Andorian met his expectant stare.

"I don't understand what you're talking about and you're making me a little uncomfortable." She handed back the bottle and resumed her spot behind the counter. McCoy gave a snort.

"Sounds perfect for you and Jim. It's settled." He took the bottle and handed it back to the clerk. Spock however, continued to look around the room contemplatively. Then he looked at the Andorian again.

"What is your store's policy on refunds?"

Scotty was sitting at the console in the transporter room when he received the request for a beam up from Mr. Spock. He set about doing so after sending for an anti-grav cart which Spock had said he needed. He'd been a little surprised when the Vulcan had said he was going down in the first place. He seemed like the only one more likely than himself to remain on the ship during shore leave, though it was for an extremely different reason. Vulcans thought vacations were an impractical and illogical use of time, and would rather spend any extra time working ahead on experiments. Scotty also used the time for more work, but that was a labor of love more than anything. He'd been infatuated with his silver lady since he got out of that water tank he was beamed into and had a chance to look around.

Once he put in the order, three figures materialized on the transporter pad, as well as several other objects. Spock appeared just as composed as ever, but Nyota Uhura and Leonard McCoy both had sour expressions on their faces as they bent down and began gathering up what appeared to be: At least five different types of liquor from various planets, gift boxes of expensive candies, incense, a colorfully decorated fruit basket, an iPad 250, and several brand new and very expensive looking articles of dressy clothing. Scotty stared as the three began loading their purchases onto the anti-grav cart.

"Ah, Mr. Spock?" Started Scotty, not sure how to phrase his question. "Did you foresee a situation where you'd need all of this." Spock halted his actions to look at him.

"I suppose there is no harm in telling you. The captain has purchased me a gift in the spirit of the holiday season. I only learned of this earlier today, and the value of the item he wishes to gift me with is a mystery. As I have no way of knowing whether I am spending too much or too little in my efforts to properly gift him in return, I have come up with what I believe may be a perfect method for the dilemma's caused by reciprocity. I will open his gift to me first, excuse myself briefly in order to retrieve my gift to him, discern the price of his gift on my computer, return with whichever item is closest to it in value, and return the other items to the shop they were purchased from for a complete refund." He finished, and Scotty couldn't' help but think he looked a little smug as he tried to process all of it.

"I see." He finally said. "That actually seems like a brilliant idea."

"I know." Replied Spock calmly. He looked back to see that McCoy and Uhura had finished piling the items on the cart. "I will keep the items in my quarters until the captain initiates the exchange two days from now. I have asked that he keep away until then to allow me a chance to find him a gift." He looked at his two companions expectantly. "Doctor McCoy, if you would be so kind as to find the captain and make sure he does not return while Nyota and I transport these to my quarters?" McCoy stalked off.

"He'd be perfectly happy to just get a 'thank you'." He grumbled. Spock ignored him and turned to Uhura.

"Shall we?" She just scowled and began pulling the cart with him. Scotty watched them depart with an amused gaze. However this turned out, it would surely be interesting.

Two days later, Nyota was the one to answer the door when Jim buzzed for entry.

"Hey, Merry Christmas!" He said brightly as she stood back to allow him in. She couldn't help but smile at his obvious enthusiasm. He was holding two presents this time. Before she could ask what the other was, Spock came from behind the room divider.

"Ah, Captain, you are here for our gift exchange." He looked at the package with his name on it, almost warily. "After careful deliberation, I believe I am sufficiently prepared for whatever it is you have chosen for me." He said the words almost like a man who'd been challenged and was now smugly awaiting the successful completion of his completion of his task. Jim just smiled.

"Here you go." He said, handing over the brightly wrapped parcel. Spock began to open it, then stopped.

"I must first inform you that I was unable to have your gift wrapped and have it hidden in my sleeping are. I will recover it momentarily." With that, he continued to unwrap his gift, which turned out to be…

"A padd?" He said questioningly. It wasn't even a particularly advanced one, just the standard Starfleet fare. He was almost disappointed after all the effort he had gone to ensuring that he would be able to give Jim a gift that equaled his own in value only to receive a common piece of software. Jim just continued to smile at him.

"Turn it on." Spock complied…and had to sit down in the chair by his desk in order to prevent himself from falling over from shock. He looked up at Jim.

"This is a list of Vulcan artifacts that were stolen decades ago." He whispered. Roughly twenty-five years ago, there had been a massive theft on Vulcan. Several prominent homes, as well as almost all of their museums, had been robbed of most of their valuables and artifacts, his parent's home included.

"Yeah." Said Jim enthusiastically. "I actually happened to sit next to this Ferengi guy in a bar on our last shore leave. I guess he had one too many, because he was bragging about how he'd been part of a group of pirates that had staged a planet-wide theft on Vulcan, and then he started whining about how he should have held onto his share longer, since they'd be even more valuable now. I tricked him out of the bar and arrested him. Then, I managed to make a deal; he didn't serve any time, just a lot of probation, if he gave up the names of his partners in the crime, and the people and locations that his share got sent to. The others got a similar deal. They all rolled over pretty fast. Then I kind of volunteered us for some stupid milk runs in order to get the recovery effort done immediately and have it all fast tracked through evidence and customs and everything. The Vulcan government doesn't even know about all this. I wanted it to be a surprise for them too, and I thought you'd like to be the one to give them the good news." Jim began listing some of the items stolen.

"There are all these old weapons, books, statues of ancient Vulcans, artwork, jewelry, and even a bunch of plant and animal DNA samples-" Jim abruptly stopped speaking as Spock sprang out of his chair as if it had bitten him.

"DNA samples?" He asked shakily. At Jim's nod, he continued. "With the right equipment and funding, we may actually be able to clone entire species back out of extinction!" To his surprise, Jim's excitement seemed to fade.

"Oh. Well, I kind of used up most of my favors just getting the stuff, but I guess I could try talking to Pike about it." Spock realized that Jim had just given him the most incredible gift he'd ever received, and he was unintentionally asking for more. He turned to his sleeping alcove.

"I will return shortly." He said as he rounded the corner. Jim stared after him surprised before turning to Nyota.

"Here, this one's yours." She took the box and opened it, then blinked in surprise. Inside was a pair of silver earrings in the shape of the Starfleet emblem. They each had a small diamond nestled in the curve.

"These are beautiful." She said honestly. Jim grinned again.

"I was hoping you'd like them. I know our dress code doesn't allow for a lot of accessorizing, but you seem pretty fond of using earrings." She nodded.

"It's a wonderful gift. And it's a lot better than what I got you." She stood up from the couch and reached behind it, pulling out a box. Jim took it and opened it up.

"A year-long gift certificate for the Universal Steak House?" He asked with a grin. Nyota shrugged.

"You're always complaining that McCoy won't let you have any good food on your diet, so you might as well get to cheat a little every once in a while.

"This is great." He said sincerely. "Thank you." At that moment, Spock came back from his sleeping alcove dragging the anti-grav cart loaded with the potential gifts and pushed it in front of Jim. Jim jumped up from the couch looking shocked.

"Jeez Spock, how much did you spend!"

"I know." Said Spock, and it almost sounded like a moan. "This is not adequate compensation." Jim looked even more shocked by that. Spock looked about helplessly before saying, "Wait." Then he moved forward until he was right in front of Jim. Jim looked at him expectantly, curious as to what he was about to do. Very slowly and hesitantly, Spock brought his arms up and wrapped them around Jim. Jim just stood there, too much in shock to be able to respond. Then it hit him what was happening and he returned the embrace. McCoy took that moment to walk it. Normally, Spock would have reigned in any sign of emotion on his part and McCoy would have teased him mercilessly, but he stayed silent, and Spock stayed where he was. The only words spoken came from Jim, softly in the type of soft voice that a parent might use to point out a skittish animal to a child, as if speaking any louder would frighten the Vulcan away.

"Look guys, Spock's hugging me!" McCoy did speak then.

"Waddya know, it's a real life Christmas miracle."

EXTRA

Later on, after Spock had broken the embrace and managed to persuade Jim to take all the items on the cart with him, he was alone in his quarters again, pondering his captain's gift. It was clear that it had taken a great deal of work, which Jim had found time to do in spite of his extremely busy schedule, and had been incredibly thoughtful and would be endlessly useful to his entire race. He could never spend enough to repay that kind of gift; it was priceless.

A chime from the bathroom door startled him. What could Jim want now? As much as he owed the man, right now he desperately needed to try to regain his emotional control. Still, he couldn't refuse the request, not after what Jim had just done for him.

"Come." He said quietly. The door opened, and he was surprised to see Jim holding yet another box, this one completely unadorned.

"I have one more thing for you." He said, totally serious now. He sat down on the couch next to Spock and held up the box. "It's not really an additional gift; it was one of the stolen items, but I figured you'd want to have it right away." He handed it to Spock, who opened it carefully. Inside was what appeared to be a common paper diary, worn from age and use. He pulled it out, mindful of its condition and opened the cover. His breath caught in his throat.

"Property of: Amanda Grayson." He whispered. Jim nodded.

"When I found out that your parent's home was one of the ones robbed, I looked at the list of stolen items, and when this was found, I had it shipped right over. I didn't read it or anything, so I don't know what years she wrote in it, but I figured it's something you and your dad would like to have, you know, to remember her by. I know you guys have perfect memories but-"

"Jim." Said Spock, cutting him off. Jim's eyes widened at the sound of Spock finally calling him by name. "No one has ever gifted me with something more precious and priceless than what you have done today." He hesitated and set one hand over Jim's on the couch. "I will never be able to thank you enough." Jim just smiled at him warmly.

"I'm glad it meant something to you. I know I could have just sent it all straight to New Vulcan, but I thought it would be really important to you." He shook his head and chuckled. "I can't believe you bought all that stuff just because you didn't know how much to spend it return." He smiled ruefully. "I didn't even actually spend anything; I just called in a bunch of favors I had because I got lucky."

"It would be illogical to assume that every favor you have accumulated due to success on missions was simply a result of 'luck'." Said Spock. Jim shrugged.

"Maybe, but it's still true that I didn't actually spend any money on your gift. You should go back down and return all that stuff while you still can."

"I cannot." Spock replied calmly. "My father would surely consider it poor etiquette to leave you with nothing in return."

"I'd have been happy with an honest and sincere 'thank you'." Said Jim with a smile. Spock nodded.

"That is what Dr. McCoy told me after I purchased all the items." Jim just laughed.

"I guess I can count it toward the next dozen Christmases." He said teasingly. Spock nodded again, but seriously this time.

"I still do not feel that I have given you everything you deserve in exchange for what you have done for me." He said softly. "I wish there was a gift I could give you that could return the sentiment of yours." Jim's eyes grew warm.

"Spock, you are a gift. I've never had anyone who could put up with me like you do. You've been there all these months while I stumbled my way through being a Captain way before I was really ready for it. You've been amazing." The sincerity and affection in Jim's eyes did the same as his gift; took his breath away. He was distantly aware of the fact that their hands were still touching. He slowly leaned forward, Jim meeting him halfway as their lips met. The kiss started out slowly and began to pick up intensity. Spock opened his mouth and Jim got his tongue inside, caressing Spock's. Spock was unable to bite back a groan, and that caused Jim to break the kiss.

"Jesus." He muttered, scooting back to his end of the couch. "What was that?" Spock raised an eyebrow in question.

"I believe you would recognize a typical human kiss." He wondered if Jim had taken offense to his actions, but what he said next clarified his issue.

"But why did you do it?" Asked Jim. "I mean, as much as I like you, and would like to do that and more, I don't want you to do because you think it'll make us even."

"I do not know why exactly I felt compelled to kiss you." He admitted. "I knew when we first began our mission that you possessed many desirable attributes in a mate, but today I saw your generosity and consideration toward others. I suppose it…drew me to you." He hesitated. "It would seem that you also possess certain non-platonic feelings toward me. I understand that our careers do not allow for the same exploration in a relationship that others might have, but if we proceed with caution, we may be able to 'work something out' as a human might say." Jim nodded slowly.

"Yeah, we could take it slow, it you really want to give it a shot."

"I believe there could be a satisfying result for us both if we are indeed a compatible match." Jim grinned at him broadly. He moved back over to Spock again, hugging him excitedly.

"If you're really willing to give me a shot, you can consider us even." He pulled back. "How about this for a start; you can be my date for the New Year's party next week. And maybe afterward we can go back to my quarters for a drink. My liquor cabinet has some great new additions." He added his last sentence with a cheeky grin.

"I accept your offer." Replied Spock solemnly.

One week later, Spock and Jim shared their second kiss in a secluded corner at the ship's New Year's celebration. Neither one new it yet, but it was a moment that would lead to the greatest gift either one of them would ever receive in their lives.

If you've seen the particular episode of TBBT that I've modeled this story after, you know there's more comedy and less touchy feely stuff. But I'm a K/S girl and I couldn't resist having them together at the end. This whole story was pretty much paraphrased, except for the cashier's line about Spock's actions. That was just too perfect and is a direct quote. I meant to have this finished and up on New Year's Day, but I got called in, so sorry about the delay. Happy New Year everybody!