I'm so sorry, Desiree.

I loved you. The first time I set eyes on you, I knew that you were the one. I'm not sure I told you that enough. Now you're gone, I want to scream it from the rooftops. Maybe you'll hear me from heaven. There's just that small chance that you'll hear me, and you'll love me enough to come back. I wish you would.

I can't see how I can live without you. I just can't do it. You were my everything. We had so many good times together, but that time was cut painfully short. You were my most precious treasure, and you were torn away from me. Just like that.

They said it was drowning. There was nothing they could do. They tried, believe me, they tried. I paid for the best care they could give you, the most expensive treatment, but it just wasn't enough. It was too late. They couldn't save you.

I hate myself for not saving you. It hurts me so much. I could have saved you. If I'd just have done what he said, he wouldn't have done that to you. I'm so sorry, baby. I wish it was me in your place. You deserved to live. I should be the one who died.

I didn't think Mello was capable of murder. He's shot people for the Mafia, but I never expected cold-blooded murder from him. It's different, it takes something else. I hate him for what he did to you. I will never forgive him. It was so stupid as well; it was only because I'd hidden his stash of chocolate from him. And now you're gone.

Goodbye, Desiree. You were the best DS I've ever had.

-Matt