Not Quite Themselves

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Spoilers: General Season 2; slightly AU post- Silly Love Songs with Quinn, Brittany and Santana still on the Cheerios; Santana and Sam are not together

Summary: Santana's actually drinking her slushy and Brittany's threatening their classmates? The Glee Girls (and Kurt) investigate.

Warnings: Language, out-of-character by its very nature, general zaniness

A/N: For those of you reading Within You Without You, there was a minor mishap where I accidentally deleted the majority of the next chapter and am in the process of rewriting it. It's almost done, expect the next chapter by mid-week.

A/N2: This is the first part of a three part story. More info in the end notes.

A/N3: Italics after line breaks are flashbacks, in case it isn't obvious in context.

Chapter One: What the Hell?

Monday

The sight of the chronically bitchy Latina Cheerio entering the building with a blue slushy in hand is more than enough to send the majority of the student body into a full-scale panic. She casually walks down the hall towards her locker, her blonde companion a couple of steps behind her with her arms crossed and eyeing the straggling students warily.

Spotting a couple of their fellow glee club members lingering in the hall, they redirect their route to go over to them. Rachel turns when she notices Kurt and Mercedes staring wide-eyed at something behind her. She almost jumps into her own locker to hide when she finds herself face-to-face with Santana, blue-raspberry slushy in hand and less than four feet away.

"S-Santana!" The diminutive diva bleats out in an awkward greeting as she tries to brace herself for the impending slushy shower.

"Come on Satan, give it a rest already," Kurt rolls his eyes challengingly, ignoring Brittany because he knows the other girl is probably too busy thinking about ducks and Skittles.

Santana raises the slushy and wraps her lips around the bendy-straw sticking out of the lid, actually drinking it for a change. Then, much to the trio's horror, the brunette giggles at them. Giggles! "Morning guys!" She chirps pleasantly with a carefree smile, her expression falters slightly when they do nothing but gape at her. Confused, she turns to the tall blonde behind her.

"Well, are you losers going to stand there like a bunch of post-lobotomy zombies or are you going to say something?" Brittany snaps, glaring at the group, earning another giggle from her counterpart followed by her slurping at the drink.

"Morning Santana!" Kurt and Mercedes immediately reply, more afraid of the uncharacteristically bitchy dancer.

"Brittany, is she okay? Should we take her to the nurse…or Miss Pillsbury?" Rachel questions, faltering slightly at the soft smile on the Latina's face.

The taller Cheerio narrows her eyes dangerously at the suggestion. "Shove it Berry! There's nothing wrong with San," she insists, appearing thoroughly insulted that the other girl would even suggest such a thing. "Right S?" She questions her friend, her tone and expression softening significantly when she turns to the girl in question.

Santana merely smiles slightly with a straw between her lips and she rapidly shakes her shakes her head as if she was a young child, her ponytail whipping back and forth in the process. "It's nice out today," she points out. "The sky matches my slushy," she grins in amusement.

"And your mouth," Brittany can't help but smile back at the sight of the other girl's blue lips, tongue, and teeth.

"Hey B, after school can we go to the park and count clouds?" Santana wonders, sucking up the corn-syrupy blue sludge at the bottom of her cup, not bothered by the unpleasant sound the straw makes as she mostly sucks up nothing but air.

"Whatever you want S," the blonde smiles fondly. "We'll feed the ducks too while we're there," she states, earning odd stares from the others who are more used to Brittany asking to do things and Santana either declaring what she was going to do and/or totally caving to the other girl's requests.

"You love ducks Britt-Britt!" Santana blurts out, her face lighting up with excitement. She holds out her pinky expectantly, practically beaming when the taller girl hooks it with her own. "Britt, I don't know where this goes," she frowns, staring at her empty cup, bewildered.

"I got it S," Brittany smiles warmly at the shorter girl before cutting her attention back to the baffled trio, her unfamiliar scowl back in place. "Deal with this Hymen," she growls at Rachel as she shoves the empty cup against her chest.

"That's not very nice Britt-Britt," Santana pouts, poking an accusing finger into her friend's ribcage, which she knows is the other girl's most ticklish spot.

"Stop 'Tana," the blonde giggles, squirming at the touch. Once she gets the other girl to stop tickling her, she shoots her best bitch-face at the three glee kids staring at them, mouths agape. Her version of 'bitch-face' is surprisingly intimidating considering that it's Brittany…the group figures that it makes sense considering she's had years of studying Santana's to be able to perfect her own.

"Come on B, we need to check to see if the locker gnomes rearranged the inside of my locker again. I hope they at least cleaned it this time," Santana mumbles the last part mostly to herself as she tugs the blonde behind her.

"Locker gnomes?" The taller girl wonders, her eyebrows shooting up.

"Yeah. You know…cousins to the underpants gnomes from that documentary we were watching a few weeks ago. Remember? You were trying to distract me by sucking on my toes 'cause you wanted us to get our mack on?" Santana prompts, hoping to jog her best friend's memory.

"San, keep it down!" Brittany hisses, eyes darting around the hall and her face burning red with embarrassment. She turns her questioning gaze to the Latina when the other girl abruptly stops, their still-joined pinkies causing her to stop along with her, sufficiently chastised by the hurt look on her face. "I remember…but that wasn't a documentary, it was an episode of South Park," she gently corrects her.

Santana giggles and tugs the taller girl closer, relinquishing her hold on Brittany's pinky so she can wrap both arms around the pale arm closest to her and leaning her head on the blonde's shoulder. "You weren't exactly paying attention so I know you just don't get it…but that's okay, I still love you," she smiles when Brittany doesn't pull away. "I liked it, you know," she says after a moment.

"Liked what?" Brittany asks, having a hard time concentrating on what the Latina is saying let alone on the ability to make the five remaining steps to their lockers.

"You sucking on my toes like that Silly," Santana replies as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "It felt good. It tickled and was super-sexy. I was so turned on," she practically purrs in her friend's ear, loving the effect she has on the other girl when Brittany's only able to articulate a strangled moan. "Can we do it again?" She asks hopefully as she pulls away so she's no longer whispering in her ear.

Brittany groans and shoots the other girl a dirty look at teasing her…it quickly melts away when she sees the sweet smile looking back at her. "We'll see," she mumbles, fighting back another blush as she manages to get her legs to work again, walking them over to their lockers. When the blonde open's her friend's locker, the Latina thanks her by way of a grateful peck on the cheek before inspecting the state the locker gnomes left her locker in.

Rachel, Kurt, and Mercedes stare transfixed at the scene unfolding before them, not quite believing that what they're seeing is at all real. "They're just attempting to pull some sort of juvenile prank or something…right?" The small brunette questions desperate for someone to explain the situation to her, anxiously crushing the forgotten empty slushy cup closer to her chest.

"I don't know what else it could be," Kurt replies, studying the duo carefully.

Mercedes turns back to a smiling, carefree Santana with her own unique brand of Brittany-eque non-sequiturs and an angry, scowling Brittany shooting insults and dirty looks at passing students. "Guys, I'm scared," she confesses. Her friends share a look that suggests they share a similar sentiment to that.

Later

Moments after the bell rings students begin filtering into the hallway, chatting animatedly with their friends as they either head towards their lockers or go right to the cafeteria for lunch. A blonde and brunette Cheerio casually exit one classroom in particular together, the shorter of the two looking acutely perplexed.

"Hey Britt-Britt?" Santana questions the girl next to her, earning a hummed response of acknowledgement. "Did you understand that assignment?" She wonders as they approach their lockers before heading off to their usual Monday lunchtime Cheerio practice.

This gives Brittany pause as she shoots her friend a suspicious look. "What do you mean?" She asks slowly, not sure she wants to know the answer.

"Like, we had to be quiet and we couldn't use our books or anything. It was weird," the Latina replies, her nose scrunching up in confusion as she finishes.

"Santana," the blonde sighs, trying to push back her thoughts on how adorable the expression on the other girl's face is. "That wasn't just a regular assignment…that was a test," she explains carefully.

"Oh…well had I known that I would have actually answered the questions," Santana giggles as she spins the dial on her locker, trying to see how fast she can get it to go.

"You were writing the whole class period. If you weren't actually answering the questions, what were you doing?" Brittany blurts.

"Drawing," the dark-haired girl shrugs nonchalantly.

Brittany claps a hand down on the one the Latina is using to spin the dial of her lock so she can stop the distracting rapid clickclickclick as it turns, Santana beams at the contact. "What were you drawing?"

"The usual: hearts, Pac Man, Lord Tubbington, smiley faces…us," she grins in response.

"Us?" Brittany finds herself asking, removing the girl's hand from the lock so she can open the locker for her.

"Of course. I drew us making out," is the amused reply. "I even used a highlighter to make sure you were a blonde…even though it's not the right shade," she frowns slightly at the last part, idly running her fingers through the other girl's blonde ponytail.

Closing her eyes, the dancer takes a deep breath and exhales slowly to calm herself. "Did you even put your name on the test? Mrs. Barker always gives me points for at least putting my name on it," she is hoping for at least something she can use as an upside to this.

"Yeah…Well, kinda," Santana grins moments before it falters slightly and she reconsiders her answer. "I didn't know she was going to take it up, so I just put whatever I felt like on it," she explains while putting books back and taking others out.

"And what did you feel like putting on it?" Brittany prompts her to continue.

"'Santana Pierce' or 'Santana Lopez-Pierce' or 'Santana Pierce-Lopez'," Santana says without the least bit of embarrassment or self-consciousness. "Which one do you think sounds better?" She wonders as she casts a look at the girl next to her.

"Um…I'll talk to Mrs. Barker later to get her to let you retake the test," Brittany avoids the question, her face turning an interesting shade of pink.

"Hey Britt, Santana," someone greets the pair from behind Brittany, his voice turning cold on the Latina's name.

"Hi Artie!" Santana grins enthusiastically. "Are those new gloves?" She questions, cocking her head to the side as she looks at his hands gripping tightly onto his wheels. "I like them," she concludes thoughtfully without waiting for a reply.

"Yeah. They…uh…" the other boy stammers, caught off guard by the dark-haired girl's behavior.

"Did you want something Nerdlinger?" Brittany questions harshly as she crosses her arms impatiently across her chest. After a moment too long of silence, she rolls her eyes in annoyance. "Listen, I don't really think we're on the same page so we're done now, okay?" She asks rhetorically as she officially ends their relationship with a fake, upbeat grin on the last word.

"I…um…what?" Artie finds himself at a loss once again, looking between both girls in confusion.

"Look Robo-dork, 'Tana and I have more important things to do than stand around while you try and reboot your hard drive or whatever," the blonde waves him off with a glare before turning on her heel and slamming her locker shut.

Santana giggles at the look on her friend's face as she shuts her own locker. "Sorry Artie. See you later in Glee," she offers sincerely with a polite smile before offering the irritated blonde her pinky, which she gladly accepts before the pair makes their way to Cheerios practice.

A baffled Artie stares off at the duo wondering if that whole thing really just happened. He notices Rachel, Puck, Finn, Mike and Tina down the hall watching him and, seeing that they've been spotted, the group migrates down the hall.

"You saw that, right?" The wheelchair-bound boy questions incredulously and the others just nod slowly. "What the hell is going on?" He wonders, quickly reaching his breaking point.

"Damned if I know," Puck shrugs. "Rachel was just telling us and I didn't believe her myself until I just saw B dump you like yesterday's kitty litter," he adds casually.

"Kurt, Mercedes and I witnessed their peculiar behavior ourselves just this morning before our first class. I can't speak for my comrades, but I have been trying to spread the word around to all of our fellow glee-clubbers," Rachel announces proudly, as though she were performing some sort of public service…which, okay, maybe she is.

"So, am I, like, the last to find out about this or something? I would think that I had a right to know considering that Brittany was my girlfriend up until two minutes ago," Artie snaps at the diva.

"I'm fairly certain that Quinn doesn't know and-"

"She'll know soon enough when she sees them in Cheerios practice right about now," Puck smirks.

"-and I doubt that Lauren knows yet either," Rachel finishes, cutting the other boy a dirty look for having dared to interrupt her.

"Lauren doesn't know what?" The girl in question asks as she comes up behind the small group. They all look over at her and their eyes widen slightly when they take in her appearance. "Does this have something to do with a couple of cheerleaders acting suspiciously out of character?" She asks knowingly.

"Um, yeah, it does. So, I guess you know about it?" Finn replies for the group, sounding more like he's questioning than confirming.

"What the hell happened, Babe?" Puck inquires, his voice laced with concern as he struggles to hold back the urge to touch the purple flesh around her swollen eye.

"How do you think I found out about them going to the Twilight Zone to have their personalities swapped?" Lauren scoffs, swatting her boyfriend's hand away as it begins to approach her eye, almost of its own accord. Seeing them looking at her expectantly, she sighs and recalls the encounter. "I was on my way to third period when…"

"Hey Zizes!" Someone barks from behind the hulking female wrestler, the hostility clear in their tone.

Lauren rolls her eyes as she turns around to see who called her, the voice sounding at least vaguely familiar. She is greeted by a powerful left cross to the eye that actually causes her to take a couple steps back at the impact.

"Wait, are you trying to tell us that Brittany did this to you?" Tina blurts, surprised at even the thought of the infamously sweet blonde hurting anyone.

"And she lived?" Rachel can't help but wonder.

"If you'd let me finish…" Lauren scowls. "So…"

The sight of Brittany being held back by the notoriously bitchy Santana is enough to catch even the unflappable Lauren Zizes off guard. She finds herself too stunned to retaliate. "The hell?" Lauren asks instead.

"That's right bitch. I just cold-cocked your ass," Brittany smugly tells her, no longer struggling against her best friend, content to let the smaller girl hug her arm to keep her from moving.

"She wasn't doing anything, Britt-Britt," Santana all but pouts at the blonde.

"Am I being punk'd or something?" Lauren asks, baffled, as her eyes dart around in search of Ashton Kutcher hiding behind a trashcan.

"This is me getting you back for hurting Santana back in February and I'm nowhere near satisfied that we're even, but I don't want to upset her any more than she already is," Brittany bites back as she manages to pry herself free from the other girl's grip.

"Don't hurt her Britt," Santana pleas, gaining Lauren's startled attention. The wrestler is beyond surprised to find tears in the Latina's eyes and the girl appearing genuinely concerned for the well-being of the substantially larger of the two.

"Are you drunk?" Lauren can't help but ask the girl currently shaking as she tries to control her sobs. The Latina is a 'weepy, emotional' drunk after all.

"Hey! Don't talk to her. You're pushing your luck 'cause I'm about five seconds from going all Ninja Cheerleader Warrior on your ass," Brittany snaps, rocking back and forth from her heels to the balls of her feet as though just waiting for an excuse to pounce on the larger girl.

"Fine," Lauren says, hoping it's enough to appease the blonde.

Brittany narrows her eyes and steps far too close into the other girl's personal space so she can lower her voice without being overheard by her best friend. "I swear that if you so much as lay a finger on her, or even look at her too hard, again, I won't hesitate to deliver a flying roundhouse right to your fucking jaw so hard they'll have to wire it shut. You'll have to go months without solid food," she growls menacingly and Lauren wills herself not to take a step back from her.

"Brittany's a second degree black belt in taekwondo," Santana chirps proudly, still having heard everything, but at least recovered from her recent bout of tears.

"That's right S. Now let's go, we have history next," Brittany smiles at her counterpart as she approaches her. They link pinkies and walk off, the blonde shoots a final warning glare at the wrestler before the pair turn the corner. Lauren stands still, staring down the hall as she tries to wrap her mind around what just happened. It isn't until the late bell rings that she finally gets shaken back to reality and the pain in her eye begins to register.

"You were scared," Puck smirks knowingly once his girlfriend finishes telling her story.

"Shut up Puckerman. I was merely caught by surprise," Lauren downplays.

"No, it sounds as though you were genuinely intimidated by Brittany," Rachel backs up her friend's accusation.

"I'd be a little afraid of her too if that was me," Tina sympathizes.

"I wasn't in the mood to snap the little girl in half and have to deal with Satan's wrath over it," she shrugs back in response.

"Except Santana's the nice one now and, even if she was still her bitchy self, we already know you can handle her," Puck points out with a smug grin.

"Did you not hear me when I told you that Santana said that Brittany has a black belt in karate or whatever?" Lauren snaps irritably.

"A second degree black belt," Tina corrects easily.

"In taekwondo," Mike adds, sharing a smile with his girlfriend.

"Whatever. I can handle one of them fine, but it would've been too much trouble to take on both at the same time," Lauren grinds out. "Let's go Puckerman. Feed me," she orders her boyfriend.

"Yes ma'am," the mohawked boy grins as they make their way to the cafeteria.

"She was afraid," Rachel concludes once the couple is out of earshot.

"Oh yeah," Mike smirks as they all head to lunch for themselves.

Choir Room – After School

"Did I miss something?" Quinn asks the handful of club members present as she stands angrily at the front of the room with her boyfriend standing awkwardly by her side.

"About what?" Kurt asks idly as he flips through his bootlegged advanced copy of next month's Vogue Paris.

"Oh, I don't know," Quinn snarks. "How about we start with Cheerios practice when Santana skips – skips! – on to the field with a red slushy, slurping loudly during Sue's daily rant about why we're all failures. Santana's usually the first one to slap a slushy from one of us and she can recite all six of Sue's diet rules that they violate…verbatim!" She nearly smacks her boyfriend in the face as she gesticulates wildly, her volume increasing as she goes.

"What did Coach Sylvester say?" Finn dares to ask. Quinn clenches her jaw as she recalls the nightmare of a practice from earlier.

"Lopez!" Sue Sylvester barks at the source of the intrusive noise. The girl in question looks up at her curiously. "What in the name of Hilary Clinton's cankles are you doing?"

"Drinkin' mah slushy," Santana smiles innocently (a tone that Brittany finds nothing short of adorable on the other girl) and not the least self-conscious that her lips, teeth and tongue are strained a loud shade of red.

"What's the matter? Is my patented and yet-to-be-FDA-approved Master Cleanse not good enough for you anymore?" She interrogates, sounding almost affronted by the other girl's audacity to not cower in fear.

"It tastes like poopy-shit," the Latina answers candidly before taking another obnoxious slurp of her drink, oblivious to the gasps of surprise and horror from those around her…and the ecstatic expression on the head Cheerio's face at the prospect of her biggest threat for the top spot being kicked off the squad for her blatant insubordination.

Narrowing her eyes, Sue scrutinizes her, usually, most obedient and ruthless Cheerio. She notices the possessive hand placed casually on Santana's tanned thigh and the challenging scowl on Brittany's face directed at anyone that dares to shoot her friend a dirty look. "I see. Try to keep it down when I'm in the middle of one of my infamous monologues," she orders, intrigued enough to continue to observe rather than jump to punishing her blindly.

"Gotcha," Santana agrees, smiling with the straw in her mouth as she attempts to keep the slurping to a minimum.

"Wow," Puck breathes out, amazed that Santana was able to get away with it. Quinn continues without acknowledging him.

"Or how about, instead of stretching during our warm-ups, Brittany was running around giving Santana a piggyback ride and Santana was laughing like a mental patient…and Sue watched them without saying a word," she nearly shouts in anger and irritation.

Most everyone attempts to hide their laughter so as not to have to face the blonde's wrath. "Seriously?" Finn asks, eyes widened in disbelief.

Quinn merely casts her boyfriend a silencing side-eye of aggravation. "And if all of that wasn't enough, when it came time to actually run through the routine, Santana actually started to pout because it meant that she and her BFF would have to be separated for a whole five minutes and she'd be at the bottom of the pyramid while Brittany's near the top holding me up," she is nearly foaming at the mouth in rage.

"So what?" Lauren shrugs, not seeing the big deal.

"When Coach saw her pouting like a five-year old, she decided to have me swap places with her so now I'm at the bottom and she's all the way at the top with Brittany holding her up. I got pissed at Santana and Brittany got in my face and actually threatened to cut me. Like, seriously, am I in some alternate reality where everyone's gone crazy?"

Several members are unable to keep from laughing out loud at this point. "I'm sure it was only for today and it'll blow over by tomorrow," Mercedes speaks up, hoping to diffuse the ticking time bomb that is Quinn Fabray.

"Uh, yeah, I don't think so," Quinn retorts. "After practice Sue called me into her office…"

"You're not living up to the expectations I had when I brought you back as the captain of my Cheerios. I'm permanently demoting you the bottom of the pyramid and reinstating Santana as the squad captain," Coach Sylvester states as soon as the door is shut.

"What?" Quinn gapes, unable to believe how abrupt this is.

"I let you come back when you informed me of Bigboobs McGee's 'artificial enhancements'. Recently it has come to my attention that you've been under the knife yourself," Sue calmly states.

"Who told you?" The cheerleader growls.

"I have eyes…or did you forget about those posters plastered all over the building, Lucy Caboosey? You're lucky I don't kick you off."

"What if I quit? Then what?" Quinn challenges, knowing how much the older woman hates it when someone voluntarily walks away from her squad.

"We won Nationals easily without you last year when Lopez was captain," Sue doesn't even bat an eye at the thought of losing the girl in front of her.

"Did you not see how spastic she was today? Brittany actually threatened to cut me. You can't seriously believe that those two are better for the squad than I am right now," Quinn points out the other girl's behavior today hoping that her coach will recognize that she's the more stable option.

"Do you really want to make me choose between losing one of my three best Cheerios and losing two of them?" Coach Sylvester doesn't even try to pretend that it isn't true that when Santana's in charge then Brittany is as well because it's common knowledge that the two are a package deal. She knows Quinn is smart enough to see that Sue won't be at all affected if she chooses to walk.

"I don't believe this," Quinn grumbles as she gets up, resigned to her lowered status on the squad…for now.

Sue decides to get one more parting shot. "Besides, last week's weigh-ins tell me you still haven't dropped all that baby weight yet and my Puerto Rican Pam Anderson still weighs less. I need a flier that can actually fly without risking the safety of all the girls trying to catch her."

Quinn suppresses a growl of annoyance and, as she exits the office, she sees Santana and Brittany waiting to go in, the shorter of the two chatting animatedly with Becky while they wait. She shoots Santana her dirtiest glare only to have it met by Brittany's shockingly intimidating bitch-face.

Anything anyone might have had to say in response to this recent development is silenced by a red, white and tan blur dashing into the room and nearly tacking Quinn in a tight hug. "Santana, what the hell?" The former head Cheerio grinds out as she struggles to get free. This is proving difficult considering the other girl has her arms pinned to her sides.

"I am so sorry Q. I tried to find you earlier because I knew you had to be upset, but Britt told me that I should give you time to cool off. When Coach told me I was captain again I was super-excited, but then I just felt awful 'cause I know how much it meant to you too. I don't know why she changed things and I didn't understand when Britt tried explaining. Please don't hate me," the Latina babbles everything out in one breath, not once relenting her hold on her friend.

Quinn wants nothing more than to hold on to her anger and hate for the other girl, but it's proving difficult because of the watery eyes pleading with her not to be mad. "Christ Fabray. Just hug her back and tell her that you don't hate her so that we can all get on with our lives already," Brittany rolls her eyes, her arms impatiently folded across her chest.

"I don't hate you. It's okay," Quinn assures the girl clinging to her as she returns the hug. She won't admit it out loud, but this scowling and protective Brittany scares the hell out of her. Despite that, however, the shorter blonde finds that she really doesn't hate Santana and she believes now, more than ever, that the two girls aren't acting like this to screw with everyone.

"Great!" Santana grins before planting a quick friendly kiss on Quinn's cheek before retrieving the purple slushy she had Brittany holding for her and skipping to her usual seat in the back.

At the kiss, Brittany narrows her eyes dangerously at the other blonde Cheerio and Quinn stands her ground, resisting every urge to crawl under the piano and hide. Before either girl can get a word out, Will enters the room with his usual easy smile firmly in place.

"All right, everyone to your seats," the glee director instructs politely, paying no mind to the withering glare Brittany shoots Quinn before joining an unusually upbeat Santana in the back. "Okay guys, let's talk mash-ups," he excitedly claps his hands together to try and get everyone pumped up, his enthusiastic smile not faltering at the resounding groans from his students. "Come on, don't be afraid to throw out some ideas," he encourages.

Rachel's hand immediately goes up and, for a moment, Mr. Schuester's bright smile wavers slightly. Then, he spots Santana with her hand raised up at the same time Brittany realizes it and the blonde wraps her fingers around her friend's wrist and attempts to surreptitiously lower it. Not to be deterred, Santana's other hand flies up and she even goes so far as to wave it around to make sure she gets Will's attention.

"Yes Santana?" The curly-haired teacher warily calls on the only person with their hand up that isn't Rachel. He can't help but be surprised that the surly Cheerio is contributing at all, let alone actually raising her hand as opposed to just saying what she's thinking like usual. That being said, he's still quite understandably cautious about what she has to say considering her track record.

For her part, Rachel simply lets her hand slowly drop down to her lap and she turns to look at the Latina. Any other time and she would have crossed her arms and glared at Mr. Schuester in a huff, but now she's just too curious to be upset about not being called on first.

"I have the best idea for a mash-up. Seriously. It'll be epic you guys! " Santana announces proudly, pausing a for dramatic effect and she takes a moment to congratulate herself for having everyone, even Brittany, on the edge of their seats in anticipation.

"Well?" Quinn prompts impatiently.

"I'm thinking, the Spice Girls and…" Santana pauses again, amusing herself with how riveted everyone is, "Korn," she finishes so as to take pity on them and put them out of their misery.

"The Spice Girls?" Puck sputters in disbelief.

"And Korn?" Finn asks for clarification, earning a grin from the Latina. "Together?" He double checks.

"Totally," Santana nods furiously in confirmation, her excitement rolling off of her in waves. The happy grin she'd been sporting since Will called on her fades slightly as she notices the all of skeptical faces looking back at her and she realizes that they're about to blow off her idea. "No, really. Spice Up Your Life and Freak on a Leash will sound so awesome together."

"Which one is Spice Up Your Life again?" Mike questions, wracking his brain to remember.

"You can look them up on the thing and then listen to them on the Youtube," Santana beams as she indicates her phone. Hesitantly, several of others follow her advice, even Mr. Schuester tries to inconspicuously listen as Artie plays Freak on a Leash on his phone. After a couple of minutes, almost everyone's dubious expressions soften into looks of contemplation.

"Come on you guys. You can't seriously be considering this!" Rachel snaps at the group.

"You got a problem, Hobgoblin?" Brittany growls confrontationally when the small diva's protests cause Santana to deflate.

"I, for one, refuse to be ridiculed by our peers as a result of this," Rachel continues stubbornly, crossing her arms in defiance.

"Trust me, there are so many other things to ridicule you for that this won't even fall in the Top Ten," Brittany snorts with distain.

"Britt, leave it alone. It's fine," Santana says quietly to her friend, placing a calming hand on her thigh to keep her from lunging at the loudmouthed brunette.

"You know, I think this might be something we can work with," Will steps in, genuinely surprised that the songs wouldn't be too hard to mash up.

"See!" Santana points to the glee director as proof that it isn't completely unreasonable. "We'll be able to incorporate a lot of vocal variety with more than just the usual one or two singers and it'll also give us a chance to showcase some sweet-ass dance moves, right Britt?" She grins at the end as she playfully nudges the blonde next to her, who blushes and sinks down in her chair at the sudden attention.

"Santana, I must say that I'm pleased to see how well you've thought this out. It's nice to see you taking such an interest in Glee Club," Will smiles. "This is definitely a good idea and if there are no further suggestions by Wednesday, then we'll get started then," he informs the group, much to Rachel's chagrin.

"Yes!" Santana cheers with an enthusiastic fist-pump followed by a high-five to Brittany. "This is going to be at least seven different shades of amazing," she tells her best friend confidently as she stands up, offering the other girl her pinky.

Brittany gets up and curls her pinky around the Latina's, smiling fondly at the smaller girl. "I'm sure it'll be epic, S," she assures her, the hyper brunette practically bouncing in exhilaration, heedless of the purple slushy sloshing precariously around in the plastic cup in her hand.

"How many of those has she had today?" Puck asks cautiously, not wanting to upset either girl since they've been acting far too unpredictable for his liking as of late.

"Four," Brittany replies idly, shaking her head in amusement as she they leave the room. Santana can be heard giggling as the blonde starts playfully poking her in the side and tickling her, unable to properly defend herself without a free hand.

Rachel is the first to shake herself out of the stupor watching the bizarre interactions had sent the rest of the room in, quickly relocating to a seat in the center of the front row, right next to Quinn, to better communicate with the others. She pointedly ignores the blonde's subtle sneer at having chosen the seat beside her as she eyes everyone else.

"You guys, this is serious!" Rachel exclaims, darting her eyes over to the door in fear of Brittany or Santana overhearing. "We need to do something," she practically demands, looking at them in hopes of getting someone to back her up.

"I hate to say this, but I'm actually with Rachel on this," Kurt chimes in after a moment.

"Me too. Seeing Satan being all giggly and cheerful is creepy and wrong," Mercedes adds.

"And Brittany kind of scares me now," Tina admits, prompting everyone to glance at Lauren and her black, swollen eye.

"Hey! I'm not afraid of that stick figure!" Lauren barks defensively at the others. "But I'm not exactly opposed to getting things back the way they were before," she shrugs nonchalantly.

"Alright Berry, what did you have in mind?" Quinn rolls her eyes as she looks back at Rachel.

The small brunette pauses a moment before narrowing her eyes in determination, nodding to herself as she seems to reach some kind of decision. "Ladies, I think it's time we hold an impromptu Glee Girls – and Kurt – meeting at my house tonight," she asserts, not missing the grin Kurt shoots her at his inclusion.

"What do you mean 'another'?" Puck asks suspiciously. "How many have you had?"

"None ya bidness," Mercedes informs him with barely a sidelong look.

"Why is it just the girls? Why can't it just be all of us except Santana and Brittany?" Finn wonders.

"Sweetie, no offense, but us girls are kind of the brains of the operation here," Quinn tells her boyfriend, trying not to sound too condescending…it's uncertain as the whether or not she succeeded.

"If we let you boys come too then you'd only slow progress," Rachel bluntly states.

"Um, you guys? What's going on?" Will finally speaks up after only growing more and more confused as they kept talking. The class just rolls their eyes before getting up and leaving. Ironing out a few minor details and the girls are set to meet at Rachel's later that evening to discuss strategy.

The update for Within You Without You was taking longer than I expected and I wanted to post something today...first day of the new year and all. So I decided to post this first chapter that's been sitting on my flashdrive for a while now. I figured it's as good a time as any to post something fun to break up the seriousness of my other story.

This is a three part story, as mentioned above. The second part will be pretty long and will be up Thursday or Friday. Expect a kidnapping, short road trip, Dr. Lopez, ice cream and mild violence…make of that what you will. Part three will be more of an epilogue as it will deal with the immediate aftermath.

Yeah, we all know Brittany's kink is having her armpits kissed (or licked?) so I figured that Santana's, for the purpose of this story, would be having her toes sucked because, well, why not?

Also, don't ask about where that idea for the Spice Girls/Korn mash-up idea came from. I have no idea either. This is a fun story though and I hope you stick around to see what happens next.