"Caring about others, running the risk of feeling, and leaving an impact on people brings happiness."

-Harold Kushner

Penelope Garcia sat alone in her office, nicknacks, pictures, and dishes of candy sufficed to brighten up the tragic filled room that had brought so much joy and pain into her life. Joy for the wonderful people she had me through her job; the men she admired—Rossi and Hotchner, her godchild's mother and soul secret keeper—JJ, her sassy friend she would take a bullet for—Prentiss, boy wonder—Reid, and her best friend and rock—Derek Morgan.

But for all the good it had brought her there were still dark things. Things that made her want to close her eyes and never open them again. The pictures and images that filled her computer monitors daily. The horrific stills of death, terrified human beings just as they took their last breaths, lifeless corpses, and probably the most horrific part; the look of desperation and the hopelessness right before the life drained from their bodies forever frozen on their still faces.

The blonde closed her eyes sucking in a deep breath of air trying to calm her nerves, in twenty minutes her best friends would be off to Georgia on a horrid case involving torture, rape, murder, and another kidnapped victim. To the team this was just another normal case; not a one of them had voiced any concern over it, it would be just another day on the job. To Penelope though this time it felt different, she had a sinking feeling in her gut. Although her gut had been wrong before so she dismissed this thought as someone knocked on her door.

"Baby girl," Derek Morgan sing-songed as he sauntered into the room. Furthering to brighten it up in a way nobody else ever seemed to be able to do, he had that affect on things.

"Love bug, is it hot in here or is it just you?" Penelope spun slowly around in her chair so she was facing him. A mischievous smile spread across her lips as she fanned herself with her hand.

"Oh, Mama," He grinned leaning down to pinch her plump, pink cheek. "You keep it pretty warm in here yourself." He said with a wink.

It was then Penelope noticed his bag thrown carelessly at her door, the sinking feeling that something was going to go horribly wrong returned with a vengeance. Her face turned from playful to upset in a matter of seconds. This didn't go unnoticed to Derek as he took her hand and leaned himself against her desk.

"What's the matter Baby girl?" He asked all playfulness gone from his tone worry in its place.

"Nothing, you know I just worry about you all when you're gone." She told the half truth; she never had been much of a liar, but she figured she might could get away with it if she peppered in a little bit of the truth.

"Are you sure you're alright?" He began but she cut off his worrying.

"Yes, my love. Now as much as I would love to keep you here and show just how alright I am," She said pushing him towards the door, and pinching his butt on her way, "You need to get going or Hotch will be waiting on you, and he will get mean."

As they reached the door he turned back towards her grabbing her in his arms, pulling her tightly against his chest. She listened to his heart beat for a few moments before, he leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

"You're very tempting Baby Girl, but you're right Hotch does tend to get a little grumpy when he has to wait on anybody." Derek said letting her go and picking up his bag and throwing it effortlessly over his shoulder.

"Bye," She said watching him as he turned and walked down the long corridor towards the bull-pen, where she knew out a set of glass double doors, an elevator ride to the ground floor, past security, he would be on his way to the plane, to Georgia, headed to the exact place that had her stomach churning.

"Bye, Baby Girl. See you when we get back," He said turning around with a wave, before he turned a corner and he was gone.

Penelope had a sad smile on her lips as she sat back down at her desk. She leaned back in her chair eyes closed and prayed to God, or whatever was out there that her friends would come home safely. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence for her she always willed her babies to come back to her without harm, but today just felt different.

Derek rounded a corner gun and flashlight drawn out in front of him, Reid at his flank gun also protectively outstretched ahead of him.

They had been trying to catch this son-of-a-bitch for six days now. The missing little girl had yet to have shown up dead or alive and after a tip that had led them here it was time to nail this bastard.

Reid and Morgan were at an old abandoned warehouse, they were supposed to wait on the rest of the team but, when they went to call them something happened with both of their cell phone causing them to ring and ring but never connect to the rest of the teams phones.

Reid had suggested they wait a minute, and think this through rationally But when they heard the sound of gunshots ring out through the night air, they had both decided it was time to make their move.

So here they were stealthily moving through the quiet, eerily still building. Adrenaline coursing through their bodies left them feeling almost numb, and there was no room for fear.

As they rounded another corner out of nowhere a dark figure came tackling them both to the ground at once. Derek felt his head slam hard into the concrete ground, and his gun and flashlight flew out of his hand landing somewhere out of reach. He went to yell and realized that he couldn't breath, the air had been knocked right out of him on impact.

He heard Spencer let out a loud grunt as the man landed on top of him, then the sound of a fight ensuing, the slap of skin and the cries of pain. That was the only thing that pulled the fog from Morgan's head and willed him off the ground; he had to help Reid.

He stood shakily. His shoulder was undoubtedly broken or dislocated. Ignoring the pain he looked around searching for his gun, and at the same time looking at the fight on the ground. At the moment Reid had the upper hand but there was no sign of his gun either.

"Hold on Kid," Morgan yelled tackling the guy to ground and off of Reid. "Get the guns!" Derek called losing his ground with the unsub and letting the other man gain control of him. The man shoved down hard on his already injured shoulder, causing a gut wrenching crack. Derek whimpered and was just about to hit him back when the man pulled a gun on him, Morgan could do nothing but stare no words could leave his mouth in time, as a gunshot rang out through the air.

Pain red hot seared through Derek's chest, as the bullet pierced through his flesh. He felt the sticky warmth of blood as it gushed through the wound.

He heard another gunshot and prayed that Spencer wasn't down too.

"Derek," He heard his partner cry, followed by his light footsteps.

Morgan thanked the God up above; Reid must have found his gun and shot the bastard.

That was his last thought as he sank into the darkness and the pain left his body.

Penelope was lying in bed it had been a long week, she hadn't been able to shake the nagging feeling something bad was going to happen. She had finally just tried to chalk it up to a lack of sleep and stomach flu that were making her this ill.

So when her phone rang at an ungodly time in the middle of the morning, she felt almost relieved that this would probably be the bad thing she had been worried about all week. The relief she felt though only lasted momentarily as she heard the shaky panic stricken voice on the other end of the line.

"Penelope,"

"What is it JJ?" She heard herself ask.

"Derek," Was JJ's one word response, but the way she said it told everything there was to tell. With that one word, Penelope's world crashed down around her.

"JJ," Penelope wailed as tears streamed down her face, she heard JJ on the other end of the line begin to cry too. Then she whispered something, and there was a shift as the phone was handed to someone else.

"Garcia," Hotch's strong voice called out to her through the phone. It pulled her back to reality for a moment, and gave her a little strength to hold onto. "It's not good. He's in surgery right now; they don't know if he'll make it out." Hotch let out a jagged breath.

"I'm on my way, I'll be on the next flight to Atlanta." Penelope said, taking a deep breath she had to calm down. She had a plane to catch. If Derek was still alive she had to see him. She had to be there when he woke up.

He helped her when she almost died. She had to be there for him. They were always there for each other. She had to be there to hold his hand and tell him everything was going to be alright. She had to believe he was going to pull through this because if she truly didn't believe it with all her heart, she would have nothing to hold onto and she would lose him and herself.

She couldn't think about what would happen if he didn't make it. She could only pray that everything would be okay.

And pray she did. She prayed and begged and pleaded with God her whole red-eye flight. She begged for Derek to be okay. She pleaded with God that she would be a better person; she would attend church every Sunday if she had to, if he would just left Derek live.

Finally after what seemed like forever at 4:30 in the morning she arrived at the hospital. Prentiss was waiting outside for her when she got there.

"Is he out of surgery yet?" Garcia asked as soon as she jumped out of the cab.

"Not yet." Prentiss said sadly taking Garcia's hand and leading her up to the waiting room.

The whole team was there waiting. Hotch and Rossi who sat in the corner talking got up out of there seats as soon as she walked in, as did JJ. Reid was the only one who remained in his seat on the far side of the room as removed from every one else as he could get.

Garcia spoke to them. Promising she was okay at the moment, while giving short side glances to Reid.

"Is he alright?" She asked quietly hoping Reid wouldn't hear her talking about him.

"He was the only one of us there when it happened. I think he's almost in shock. He won't talk to any of us." Pretniss explained.

"What exactly did happen?" Garcia asked not sure if she even really wanted to know.

"Reid and Morgan where the only two at an abandoned warehouse, where the unsub was thought to be. They heard a gunshot, headed into the building. There was fight between Reid, Morgan, and the unsub. The unsub shot Morgan in the chest. Reid shot the unsub. He preformed CPR on Derek until the ambulance showed. When they got Morgan to the hospital he barely had a pulse and they rushed him straight into surgery. Spencer refused treatment and hasn't spoken to us since." Hotch informed her. Everyone else stood there eyes cast downward. An unsettling silence loomed over the group.

"Uhh-" Penelope started but she could find no words to explain the feelings that were haunting her. So she turned on her heels and walked to where Reid sat, staring past her and the group to the clock on the wall.

"Hey Pretty Boy," She said, a sob caught in her throat as she noticed his blood stained shirt. As if that didn't nearly kill her the sad almost dead look in his eye when he finally made eye contact with her was like a punch in the gut.

He didn't speak but instead, he gave a slight nod. Penelope didn't try to force anything else from him. Instead she pulled a chair up right next to him and sat down.

She noticed his hand twitch towards her as if he wanted to give her a comforting touch, but then he thought better of it. But Penelope knew better. She knew Spencer was never one for touch, but she also knew how sometimes all you needed was contact with someone else to give you strength.

So she reached over and took his hand. He looked down at their hands and then up into Penelope's eyes. She was momentarily overwhelmed by the puppy dog look on his face, and his sad defeated eyes.

"Spence, are you okay." She asked quietly, softly like she was talking to a frightened animal.

"It could have been me," He whispered almost in audibly. "It should have been me. The guy came up on me. Derek was head and I was at his flank and he got past me. He had me on the ground first. But I'm the one sitting here in this waiting room. While my partner, my best friend, is fighting for his life in there on that operating table. I sure as hell am not okay." He nearly yelled as tears started to stream down his face.

"This is not your fault Spencer. Please, I know this is hard. I know we all want someone to blame this on. Someone to hate. But that person is NOT you. All you are going to accomplish by hating yourself for this is to create more scars and more hurt, than this situation calls for believe me; I know how easy it is to blame yourself for someone you love getting hurt. But the fact of the matter is that the person who shot that bullet, is dead. You shot him, Spence. He is dead and for right now Derek is alive. And that is because of you. You gave Derek CPR and kept him alive until he got to the hospital. You saved his life. So if you need somebody to blame, to hate for this, blame the bastard who shot the gun. And if you start to feel the hatred for yourself again remember that yes, Derek is in there on that operating table because of you. Because if it had not been for you. He would be in a whole in the ground dead." Penelope said, she had moved out of her chair so that she was kneeling in front of Spencer, and she had his head cradled in her hands. Tears were streaming down both of their faces.

"Do you understand me, Pretty boy?" She asked quietly. Spencer sat there a moment letting what she had said sink in before he gave a slight nod.

With that Garcia climbed off of the floor and back up into her seat. Reid shocked her by reaching over and grabbing her hand this time. She leaned over in her chair so that she could rest her head on Spencer's shoulder. She used her hand that was not holding his and wiped the tears from his face.

"Thank you, Penelope." He whispered quietly against her hair. Penelope was stunned for a moment. Reid wasn't one to verbally express his feelings and generally he wasn't good with words.

"I love you, Spence. No matter what."

"Uhh- the family of Derek Morgan?" A tired looking doctor called as he walked into the waiting room.

Everyone stood and walked over to where the man was standing. Reid never let go of Penelope's hand.

"He made it out of surgery. It is a miracle he is still alive. But he's not out of the woods yet. The next thirty-six hours are crucial. We will be keeping him sedated for as long as possible. So most of you can probably leave and get some rest. I can take two people back to visit with him now though." The short man said looking towards Hotch as if he could tell he was the leader of the group.

The team looked around at each other as if trying to decide amongst themselves who the lucky two would be. But Hotch wasn't waiting around for all of that. He had already decided.

"Garcia, Reid, I think it would best for Derek if you two were here for him when he wakes up," Hotch said and that was that the rest of the team started towards the exit. "Please call us if anything happens." Their leader said as he too turned around and left.

Reid and Garcia followed the doctor down some long corridors. They were stark white and smelled of antiseptics that made there noses crinkle in distaste. Eventually though they ended up in the Intensive Care Unit where Derek was located.

A tall blonde bombshell nurse led them into Derek's room, and Penelope couldn't help but think that this was just the type of nurse that he would appreciate having. All light-hearted thoughts ceased though as she got her first look at her best friend.

Derek had tubes and wires coming out of him everywhere that were hooked to about ten different medical machines and devices. Reid squeezed her hand. She looked up at him, and was surprised to see that he looked eerily calm.

"Are you okay?" She asked him, for the second time that day.

"I know it's hard to imagine, but he looks better than he did the last time I saw him." Reid said looking down at her.

Garcia nodded, and let go of Spencer's hand; she took a few tentative steps towards her best friend, trying to only concentrate on the rise and fall of Derek's chest and not anything else.

When she reached his side her breath caught in her throat. There was not a scratch on his face and he looked so peaceful and still, the pure beauty and goodness of Derek Morgan was right there for her to see. Plain and simple laid out for her on the gorgeous features of his face.

It started to overwhelm her as the dark thoughts returned. The things the doctor had said about how he wasn't out of the woods yet. It tugged at her heart and as she looked down at his almost angelic face again she began to sob. She couldn't lose him.

For as long as she could remember, or at least ever since she had met him, Derek had been the brightest spot in her life. She had been through a lot before she joined the BAU, and since she had joined she'd been through a lot more. Now though she couldn't imagine going through anything without Derek.

Spencer came up beside her pulling her against him, as she cried onto his shoulder.

"Shhhh," He tried to be as comforting as he could be.

It took her a moment, but soon she had herself composed. She had to be strong, for Spence, for the team, for herself, but most importantly for Derek. So she pulled away from Spencer, and pulled one of the chairs in the room over beside the bed.

She looked down at Derek's hands lying limply at his sides. Hands that were almost as familiar to her as her own. Carefully she reached out and took his big hand in hers, noting as she always did the contrast of her pale milky white skin next to his mocha. A combination she had come to find very lovely together over the years.

"Spencer," She said turning to look at him.

"Yeah,"

"Will you go get us some coffee?" Although the statement itself was a question she meant it as more of a command. She wanted a few moments alone with Derek, and she would give Reid a few minutes to himself too.

"Uhhh, sure." He mumbled turning on his heel out the door.

Penelope looked back at her best friend and gently caressed the side of his face ,with her hand that wasn't still holding his.

"Oh Derek, Hot stuff, Love," She rambled using some of her pet names for him. "I love you, you know that right? I love you to the moon and stars and back, and I'll quite possibly love you till the day I die. So I'm putting in a request, no scratch that, I'm making a demand that you get better, and soon. There are so many people who love you and count on you for so much.

You're such an amazing person Derek. You've taught me so much about life, about the person I want to be. You help make me a better person each and every day. You help me to believe in human kind. We see so much darkness in this job, but you help me to see the light. Hell you are the light to me.

So that's why you have to get better, you have to get better, because with you here the world is better." She whispered her thoughts to him. Tears streaming down her face. She hoped he heard her.

Penelope sat with her eyes closed lost somewhere between unconsciousness and reality when she felt something lightly squeeze her hand. Her eyes popped open to look around the dimly lit room. It took a moment to register where she was at.

She was holding Derek's hand at the hospital. Spencer sat across the room sound asleep curled up in a chair. When she looked back at Derek she was overwhelmed by the sight of his beautiful milk chocolate eyes open staring back at her in wonder.

"Baby girl," He whispered hoarsely a small smile spreading across his lips.

"Reid," She yelled startling him and nearly making him fall out of his chair. "Go tell the nurse he's awake!" Stumbling he ran awkwardly out of the room.

"I'm right here angel." Penelope said turning back towards Derek.

About that time the doctor and two nurses walked in.

"Hello Derek," The doctor said coming over to take the other side of the bed. Reid walked up behind Penelope standing closely behind her chair.

Derek noticed him return and his face once again lit up, "Hey Pretty boy."

Reid smiled.

"How are you feeling Derek?" The doctor asked forcing Derek's attention away from his friends.

"Ughhh, disoriented. My shoulder hurts like a son-of-a-bitch, along with my head and chest." He moaned. Penelope felt her heart sink at the sound of him in pain.

"The disorientation should ware off in a few hours. We can give you something to dull the pain, but you will probably feel some discomfort for awhile." The doctor said flipping through a chart he had in his hand and ordering a nurse to fetch some kind of meds.

With that though he was gone leaving just the nurse switching out IV fluids.

"I called the rest of the team they're on their way." Spence said walking back over to the chair he had been previously sleeping in.

"Baby girl," Derek asked using his good hand to brush the tears from her face. "Why are you crying, Penelope?" He asked.

"I'm just so happy you're awake, that you're all right. You scared me to death, Derek. I was afraid I might lose you." She whispered the last part, looking down at her shoes.

"I love you, you know that right." He questioned her gently pulling her close to him so he could kiss her forehead.

"I love you too, hot stuff. Forever and always." Penelope promised.

"You two are just to cute together. You make such an amazing couple. Are y'all married?" The nurse, whom they had almost forgotten was in the room, intrigued.

Penelope felt her cheeks turn red, and was at a loss for words. Derek though answered without hesitation, "Not yet,"

"Well don't put it off for too long. A love like y'all have is hard to find." The grandmotherly lady said as she walked out of the room.

"I didn't think you two were dating!" Spencer accused.

"Why aren't we?" Derek asked Penelope.

She was at a loss for words. It's not like she had never thought of dating Derek. He was amazing. He was attractive, caring. He understood her better than anyone,

She was also aware that they weren't in the same league. She knew she wasn't Derek's type. So she had been content to just be best friends. To have Derek just be in her life as a buddy, rater than run the risk of losing him in her life for good.

Never before had she ever thought that he might like her like that. That he might want to take their relationship to that level, yet here he was asking her just that. She felt her heart leap with joy as she answered.

"Because you never asked. But if this is you asking, then this is me saying yes."

Penelope stood looking in the mirror. She fidgeted with her hair and dress, even though everything was perfect.

JJ came up behind her holding something blue and frothy and white in her hands.

"Time for your garter," She said bending down and hiking Penelope's dress up too far revealing the lacy underwear she was concealing underneath her white dress, and helping her to slide the white lace and blue bead covered elastic up her thigh.

"Now you have your something borrowed, Derek's mothers pearl necklace, which is old so we can mark those two thing off. Your something blue with the beading on the garter, and your something new with this gorgeous dress. I think we have everything covered."

JJ stepped back to admire her best friend, a tear escaping down her cheek.

"Don't start crying on me!" Penelope demanded a sob stuck in her throat threatening to spill over and ruin her makeup.

"You just look so beautiful. I'm so happy for you." JJ said running over to pull her best friend in for one last hug as they heard the wedding march begin.

They both stepped out of the little room, and into the hallway, the double doors opened and JJ walked down, she was her maid-of honor and only bridesmaid. She had made the offer of bridesmaid to Prentiss whom had thanked her but admitted that frilly dress and heels weren't really her thing and she would rather watch the festivities from her seat.

"You look gorgeous kitten. Derek is one lucky man." Rossi said walking over to take her arm and lead her down the isle.

The doors opened again and this time Penelope walked through them, Rossi at her side. Everyone stood staring at her, but she only noticed the dark skinned man standing at the end of the isle.

When she made eye contact with him, she was surprised to see a tear run down from the corner of his eye, as he mouthed the words "So beautiful".

They finally reached the end of the isle. Penelope's heart nearly leaped out of her chest this was really it. She was about to marry, her best friend and soul mate Derek Morgan. She thought back to that day in the hospital.

Taking their relationship from friendship to the next level had been as easy as laughing and talking. Being together like this was obviously right.

"Who gives this women to this man?" The minister asked Rossi.

"Her family," By this he didn't mean her actual blood relatives no what he meant was the family she had chosen for herself here at the BAU.

With that he turned kissed her cheek and handed her off to Morgan.

Penelope stood holding Derek's hand looking into his eyes, not really hearing what the minister was saying. She could only focus on the fact that in a little while she would be Mrs. Derek Morgan.

She was pulled from her thinking as the preacher explained that she and Derek had written their own vows to each other.

Derek turned behind him to get his vows from Spencer—his best man. Opening the folded piece of paper he stared right at her and Penelope was sure he could see straight into her soul.

"Penelope Garcia, Baby girl, today is no doubt the best day of my life. You look so beautiful. I feel like the luckiest guy in the world. I am so lucky because today not only am I getting a wife, but I will also get to spend everyday with my best friend.

As your husband I promise to hold your hand wherever we go to let the world know you're mine. I will wake you up with kisses every morning. I'll kill all the bugs, and protect you from anything bad. I'll call you Baby Girl and you can call me Hot Stuff. When I go away on cases I'll call you every night and talk to you on the phone until you fall asleep. I'll calm you down when you're stressed out. But the most important thing that I'm promising you today is that I will love you through anything. If we're having good times or bad times, if you're grumpy or happy, if you are tired or annoyed with me I'll love you through it all.

Penelope you make me a better person. You have helped to mold me into the man I want to be. I'm lost without you. When you're not with me something inside me is just not right. That's why today I'm taking you as my wife. So that I claim you for my own for the world to see for the rest of our lives."

Penelope felt the tears slide down her cheeks and quickly tried to wipe them away before the ruined her make-up.

"Penelope Garcia, keeping these promises and words in mind do you take Derek Morgan to be your lawfully wedded husband?" The preacher asked her.

"I do." She whispered almost inaudibly.

JJ tapped her on her shoulder and handed her, the sheet of paper with her vows typed on them. Not that she really needed them she had the words pretty much memorized.

"Derek, Today starts the rest of my life with you. I'm so happy I can barely stand it. My relationship with you is so easy. It's like laughing or breathing. I can be my full self around you, and feel totally at ease. Which makes me feel like a very lucky girl. They say in life you have a lover and a best friend and if you're really really lucky then you'll have one person be those two people. With you I've found that.

Hot Stuff as your wife I will kiss away your tears and be your shoulder to cry on. I will support you in everything you do. I'll do my best not to steal the covers in the middle of the night. I'll tease you and please you. I'll probably make you laugh, and every once in a while I might make you angry. I'll stay up late watching football games with you on the couch. I'll try to learn to cook, so that you won't have to every night. And while I'm learning new things I'll try to learn a little about sports too. As Mrs. Derek Morgan I promise to love you everyday, and to fall more in love with you everyday.

Derek Morgan you are my soul mate. I am one hundred percent certain God made us for each other, and I thank him for you everyday. You make my world a better place. You help me to be a stronger person and help me to take life less seriously. As I take you as my husband today, I hope that you and everyone here knows that I love you so much. I value your life just as much as mine, and I don't know where I'd be without you. In plain I'm hoping that everything I have said here today shows how much I love and care about you."

"Derek Morgan, keeping theses promises and words in mind do you take Penelope Garcia to be you lawfully wedded wife?" The preacher asked Derek.

"I do." Derek said loud enough for the whole church to hear.

"With that I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Derek Morgan. Derek you may now kiss your bride."

Derek needed no more encouragement. He leaned forward attacking Penelope's lips with his own. The kiss was sweet, but filled with emotion. Showing each other how they felt. Showing and not just saying how they felt about each other.

In that moment Penelope was content, she was sure life could get no better. That awful phone call in the middle of the night had forever changed her life... for the better.

Wow! This is my first fanfiction so I hope y'all enjoy it. I've worked really hard on it.

I've tried my best to be grammatically correct, but I am human and I do make mistakes.

If it's too bad though I might be looking for a Beta so if anyone wants to help me with that let me know.

If you enjoyed this story let me know in a comment.

If you didn't let me know in a comment why you didn't.

Thanks so much for reading. :)