Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran high school host club (Or Assassin's Creed…. I wish I did though)

A/N: I'm sorry it's been so late in coming ;_; Uh, if you don't like swear words… Uhm…. Look away now?

"FUCK YES!"

Tamaki pouted. "You said you'd go easy on me!"

Hikaru's victorious face became sheepish. "Oh yeah… sorry…"

The blonde grinned. He couldn't stay mad at Hikaru when he was being cute and shy like that. "I CALL A REMATCH!" He yelled happily.

They spent hours like this, side-by-side (admittedly very close together) on the couch in the Hitachiin's room.

"AH SHIT. C'mon Altaïr! Climb the fucking building!"

"Maybe if you go that way?" Tamaki said, pointing at a stack of barrels on the screen.

"Ah yeah, good idea!"

"Hehe~ I think I'm getting better at this" Tamaki grinned. It had only taken him six months.

"Yeah, you've certainly impr- AH FUCK. TEMPLARS." Hikaru tapped madly at the remote, but he had been greatly outnumbered, and soon died. "Ah fuck you AND your families." He growled.

Tamaki frowned at the now blue-y black game-over screen as Hikaru fell back into the sofa and sighed. "What do you want to play now?" He asked, then turned his head to stare at the blonde. "What's wrong?" He asked.

"Why do you swear so much?"

"What? I dunno."

"It's not very becoming of a young man."

"You sound like a grandma" Hikaru laughed.

"But…" Tamaki pouted.

"Then you want me to change myself?"

"NOooooooo! Of course not!" Tamaki's eyes widened.

Hikaru grinned. "Then swearing it is."

"Hmm… then what about a compromise?"

"Oh yeah? What kind of compromises?"

Tamaki frowned, he hadn't really thought this far ahead. "Uhm… If you don't swear… then I'll…"

Hikaru raised a quizzical eyebrow. "You'll…?"

"Uhmm…"

A thought occurred to Hikaru and he blushed slightly, turning away. "D…e" He murmured.

"Pardon?"

"Da.e" He said again, only slightly more audible.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear-"

"DATE!" Hikaru shouted. "Take me to a GameCon again." He said, pointedly looking away, his blush deepening.

A smile slowly spread on Tamaki's face. "Of course! Yes, we can do that!"

Hikaru's eyes widened slightly at the shock of Tamaki's enthusiasm. He hadn't really expected that the blonde would deny him, but he hadn't been sure whether Tamaki had actually enjoyed himself the last time, or if he was just playing along to make him happy. "Deal." He said, his lip curling up slightly, trying to cover up how ecstatic he was. Ah, fuc- darn it all. He thought, then grinned. "Thank you." He said, launching himself into a hug.

This time it was Tamaki's turn for his eyes to widen, but then he soon got over the shock and petted the younger boy's hair. "Hehe~"

Kaoru and Kyoya stood slightly off to the side, watching Hikaru concoct something in the Ootori kitchen.

"Uhm… Hikaru? What are you doing, exactly?" Kaoru asked, slightly worried.

"Shh!"

"And why're you doing it in my house?"

"Shh!" Hikaru hushed again, this time slightly blushing.

"Oho~ Blushing, eh?" Kaoru grinned evilly. "Has it got something to do with a certain sempai?"

"SHH!" Hikaru started whisking the mixture a little too hard, and the bowl went whizzing out of his hands and its contents spilt on the floor.

"FU-" Hikaru paused slightly. "FUDGE NUGGETS!" He growled.

"Fudge nuggets?" His twin repeated in question.

"What? I'm trying not to swear!"

"Hikaru? Not swearing?" Kyoya laughed. "What has the world come to?"

Hikaru blushed again, angrily staring at the half-solid half-liquid mixture on the stone floor. "Shut up. It's for a good cause." He said, bending down and scooping up some of the mess with a look of disgust.

"A good cause?" Kaoru asked. "Like charity or something?"

"No." Hikaru said simply, depositing the stuff into the bin before an agitated maid came in and took in the situation.

"Ootori-sama, we need to start cooking dinner soon." She said, a crowd of white-clad chefs starting to assemble at the doorway. She looked at the off-white stain on the floor, then back at her boss. "Vacate the area now. Please."

Kyoya shrugged. "Come on, you two." He said, grabbing the collars of the twins and dragging them out of the room.

"Oi! Kyoya! LET GO OF ME!" Hikaru said, squirming.

"Oh, just 'Kyoya' eh? No honorifics now?" He said, depositing the boys on the living-room sofa.

Hikaru growled, staring at his dirty hands. "You're my little brother's boyfriend. I can call you what I like."

"Oh really now." Kyoya said, slightly amused. Invisible sparks flew between the two as a war was about to be called.

Kaoru sighed and straightened his shirt. "Hikaru, you know where the bathrooms are, why don't you go find one, wash yourself up, then you can come and explain why you're here, and maybe we can help."

Hikaru growled again but stood up, passing the raven-haired boy and resisting the urge to wipe his hands down the elder's shirt. "Next time." He muttered under his breath before walking off.

Kyoya raised an eyebrow before gracefully sitting down on the sofa next to the remaining twin. "You think it's for Tamaki's birthday?" He asked, knowing the answer anyway.

"Yeah… It's the 7th today though, what do you think he's trying to achieve before tomorrow?"

"I don't know…" Kyoya said. "Judging by what he was making earlier, it looked like a cake."

"A cake?" Kaoru asked. "Why doesn't he just buy one, it'd be a lot easier, and probably cheaper too, judging by the amount he's thrown away so far."

"Hmm… You know what Tamaki's like when it comes to these things… the commoner's way is the best way, I guess."

"I'm pretty sure commoners buy birthday cakes as well…" Kaoru murmured. "But I guess you're right… and anyway, he has the 'it's the thought that counts' angle if he fails dramatically."

"I'm not GOING to fail, little brother."

Kaoru bent his head back to see Hikaru entering the room.

"Right… so how're you expecting to make this cake when you have neither experience nor resources?"

"How the… duck should I know?"

"Duck?"

"I think he tried to replace a certain swear word with a similar sounding one." Kyoya said, opening his black book and scribbling something down.

"Look, is there something wrong with me not wanting to swear?"

"No, no, of course not. I was just wondering what brought about the change."

Hikaru sighed at his brother's persistence. "Tamaki."

"Yes… I think any fool could assume that- are you so madly in love that you would give up one of your most cherished habits?"

"Cherished habits?" Hikaru spluttered. "Maybe I just didn't want to sound…unbecoming?"

"Unbecoming?" Kaoru snorted. "Aww, Hikaru learnt a long word!"

"Shut up!"

"Make me." Kaoru grinned. "Or is fighting too 'unbecoming'?"

Hikaru's eye twitched. "Fine. Be like that. I just thought that my kind little brother and the all-knowing Demon Lord might help me in my pursuits." He said, turning to head for the door.

"Wait." There was the sound of paper being ripped from a pad, and Hikaru looked to see Kyoya holding up said sheet with one hand. "Here. It should be simple enough for you to follow."

Hikaru frowned at it from afar before taking a couple of steps. He reached for it tentatively. "What is it?" He asked.

"It's a basic recipe for a Victoria Sponge."

"Vic- What's that?"

Kyoya sighed. "A Victoria Sponge. A simple vanilla flavoured cake with a jam and cream filling. You should be able to find all of the ingredients in any kitchen. Even your own. You don't need to do much- you can either hand mix it or if you're feeling especially incompetent, you can put it all in an electric blender. Just keep watch of the oven once it's in, and don't be tempted to open the oven doors." He explained, turning back to his black book. "You can leave now."

Both twins stared at Kyoya blankly for a second. "When did you learn how to bake?" They asked simultaneously.

"I thought you hated sweet things?" Kaoru asked.

"Hmm… I didn't think there was any harm in knowing- I have a few simple recipes, all borrowed from Haruhi."

"Right…" Kaoru said incredulously. "And when were you intending to bake this?"

"Oh I've never intended to bake anything. I just thought that there was never any harm in having them in case." He looked up and smiled at Kaoru before noticing Hikaru's lack of departure. "Was there anything else you needed?"

Hikaru looked up from the piece of paper, his mouth still slightly agape. "I.. uhmm…" He closed his mouth "Uh…" Then he grinned sheepishly. "Thank you" He said before running off.

"Well that was adorable." Kaoru said in disbelief. "D'ya think he's that adorable at any other time?"

Kyoya shrugged, pushing up his glasses. "I think I can slightly understand why that fool Tamaki would fall for him."

"Hmm…" He smirked evilly. "You wanna swap me for him?"

Kyoya raised an eyebrow. "Good god, no. Imagine putting up with him for the rest of the time." He faux shuddered.

"That your only reason?"

Kyoya engulfed him in a hug. "Shush."

Hikaru beamed at the golden, spongey cake which had appeared from the oven. It was basically perfect. A little lopsided and a tiny bit too brown on one side, but that could be fixed with the cunning use of a knife and some icing, no doubt. "Hehe~" His face fell and he brought his palm to his face. "I just giggled." He said to thin air. "Good lord, I just giggled." He sighed and fiddled with the knife in his hand. "What has that idiot Prince done to me?" He muttered before proceeding to slice the cake into two.

Kaoru arrived home to the rank smell of burning. "Oh god." He said, quietly thankful that his brother hadn't actually burnt the whole house down, but not expecting the kitchen to be fully intact. He peeked through the doorway to find what could only be described as a pit of hell. Cakes more synonymous with charcoal littered the table tops, unwashed bowls were piled in stacks, and all surfaces were covered in a thin layer of some white powder, hopefully flour. He saw a flash of red out of the corner of his eye. "Hi-Hikaru?" He asked.

"Yup! I'll be with you in a sec!" Said boy called cheerily. "DONE! It's a masterpiece!"

Kaoru raised an eyebrow, more than slightly worried about his brother's sanity, or lack thereof. "Uhmm.."

"Hehehe~" Hikaru stood, masterfully manoeuvring around the dangerous-looking piles of crap and held out a plate. "Look! It's amazing!" He said, sounding extremely awestruck.

"Wha-Wow. Wow! Hikaru? You made this?" Kaoru asked, staring at the beautifully adorned cake. The sponge could still be seen, and it looked a beautiful golden colour- just perfect. It was filled with cream and strawberries cut into halves, then on top was another layer of cream with more strawberries and what looked like fresh flowers on top, with chocolate writing reading: 'Happy Birthday Rene!'

"Yeah, I didn't like the jam; it looked too flat for a filling, so I cut up some strawberries. Then I decided that that would look pretty on the top, so I used the same for the top with the left-over cream. Then I found this stuff in a cupboard called 'rice paper', which you can use to make these!" He picked up a small flower from the table. "Don't they look real? All you need is a small paintbrush and some food colouring. I tried roses, daisies, violets, pan-" He paused mid-word, his eyes leaving the flower to look at his brother's face. "Shi- sugarplumfairy. I did it again. Dammit!" He sighed. "Sorry, I don't know why I go into this raving fanboy mode. It's just… It's so much better than baking cookies. They're so monotonous. With this, the possibilities are endless!" He smiled childishly.

"Hmm…" Kaoru laughed. "I think it has more to do with your motive than what you're cooking."

"Motiv-" His cheeks turned the same colour as the Rose adorning the cake.

"See?" Kaoru smiled. "Ahh, young love is such a beautiful thing!"

Hikaru hastily put down the cake so that he wouldn't drop it, covering his face with both hands and crouching down so that he was as far out of view from his brother as possible. "Be quiet."

"Aww, Hkaru's getting shy~" He teased as a maid walked in.

Unlike the Ootori maid, she wasn't quite as confident in herself and wouldn't ever dream of ordering her masters. She remembered what the dastardly twins had made the last time they had stepped foot in the kitchen with fear. The sight of it still haunted her dreams. She took one look around the room, her eyes widening and looking as if she were about to swoon. "I QUIT!" She screamed as she ran away.

Kaoru sighed and rolled his eyes at the woman before turning back to the kitchen. He had to admit, she had a point. It was dirty enough to make anyone turn and flee. "Oi, Hikaru. Clean up your mess." He commanded.

"What? Why?" The twin replied, his embarrassment receding enough for him to stand up, although he still couldn't make eye contact. "We have maids to do that!"

Kaoru sighed. "If you want the full-on commoner experience, you have to tidy up as well as bake. It comes as a package."

"But-"

"No buts. Get. On. With. It." He said, pulling out his phone. "I need to go and hire a new maid- they're rare to come by, nowadays." He said, leaving the room. "And I'm hungry, so hurry it up so that the remaining cooks can… cook."

"Just like the Demon Overlord." Hikaru muttered before turning to face the disaster zone. "For fuc-Fumblemore's sake, this is going to be hard." Inside his head he debated whether he could go an evening without food. It was certainly more appetizing than having to clear up the mess. But eventually that side of his mind lost as he looked to his cake. He grinned again and carefully took it over to the fridge before rolling up his sleeves and tightening the knot on the back of the apron he had found. "Right. Let's do this thing."

Tamaki stared at the beautiful creation with wonder, listening to every word as Hikaru recounted how he had made it. "Wow… you did all of that by yourself?" He asked.

"Yeah… well I was given the recipe by Kyoya." He paused briefly. "-Sempai." He added.

"By Kyoya? He bakes?"

"Hm… I think he's trying to learn on the sly without Kaoru noticing." He grinned. "Ah young love." He said, definitely feeling that that line was enough revenge against his brother.

"Oh, wow" Tamaki said, shaking his head with a massive grin. "That's… you're amazing Hikaru! Thank you!"

"Hahaha! Yes I am!" He said, puffing himself up. "Exceeeept… I don't have anything else planned for the rest of the day." He admitted. In all of the excitement of the cake making and clearing up, he had forgotten to organise anything to do.

"No matter." Tamaki said, still entrapped by the cake. "I'm happy just watching you play video games!"

Hikaru frowned. "But that's no different from what we do every day."

"Yup! It means I get to spend time with you alone!" Tamaki grinned.

"Hmm…" Hikaru tried to cover up the blush with his fringe. "If that's okay with you."

"Yup!"

Hikaru sniffed, still not sure. "Okay… well let's go up to my room then."

"Okay!" Tamaki said, jumping up.

"You can put the cake down, you know. It's probably best to be left in the fridge until tea time anyway."

Tamaki held the plate protectively. "Mine!" He whined like a kid.

Hikaru laughed. "Fine, I'll get some plates, you go up."

"Okay!" He said, bounding away.

Hikaru got the plates and jogged up the stairs. As he reached his bedroom, he heard a large yelp, a thud and the sound of a plate crashing. Wide-eyed, he sprinted the last couple of steps and flung the door open. "Rene? Are you okay?"

Tamaki was sprawled on the floor, his feet tangled in various wires from one electronic product or another. "I'm really sorry!" He cried.

Hikaru followed Tamaki's eyes until he was staring at the mess on the floor, which had once been cake-shaped and now looked like an elephant had trampled on it. Then he looked back at where Tamaki was lying and ran over to him, depositing the plates at a safe distance. "Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself?" He asked

"Sorry! I'm so sorry! I'm such an idiot!" Tamaki said, tears springing up in his eyes.

Hikaru looked down at the cake once more before laughing. Not an evil laugh, nor an angry one, but a genuinely happy laugh.

Tamaki stared at him through his tears. "Hika-Hikaru… are you okay?"

Hikaru grinned. "Hey, Rene, wanna learn how to bake a cake?"

"But…"

Still smiling, he dipped a finger in the cream/cake and then licked it. "Hey, it actually tastes nice!" He laughed again and took another fingerful, offering it to the stunned boy, still tangled up. "Want some?"

Tamaki nodded, unsure of what else he could do, before licking the offered finger. "It tastes as good as it looks!" He said, shocked.

"I know, right? I must be a genius!"

Tamaki nodded again but more enthusiastically.

"Maybe if I try again, it'll be better!" the redhead said. "See? Now I need to know! So help me make another." He offered another fingerful to the older boy.

Kaoru walked past the open door. "Hikaru? I'm just going out, don't burn the house down before I come bac-" His jaw dropped as he saw the scene- Tamaki on the floor entangled by wires and licking his brother's finger. "Woah… you two have some weird fetishes… S&M, much?" He muttered before turning away, mumbling something about cleansing his mind. "CLOSE THE DOOR NEXT TIME!" He yelled from the bottom of the stairs before slamming the front door.

Both avoided each other's eyes until they heard the door closing. Neither had realised how awkward they had looked before then, both caught up in the moment in more ways than one.

"Um… Let's free you from there." Hikaru said, wiping his finger on his jeans. Hell, they would be covered in flour later, anyway. He stood up and untangled the large knot of wires, mentally reminding himself to tidy up properly next time. "Right, there you go." He said, removing the last one.

"Thank you" Tamaki said, standing up. "What do we do about the cake?"

"Uhmm… It's a wooden floor, so I guess we just chuck away the big bits of cake and plate and mop up the rest?"

"Oh, okay." He said, still staring at the mess. "Uhm… what's a mop?"

"You don't know what a mop is? Even I'm not that bad, and that's saying something!"

"Is it… uhm…" He shook his head as nothing similar came to mind.

Hikaru rolled his eyes. "Okay, just sit here. Don't. Touch. Anything."

"But I wanna help!"

"No. You're the birthday boy, I won't allow it." He said, not wanting to admit out loud that Tamaki would probably hinder more than help.

"…But…"

"If it were my birthday, would you let me do anything?"

"No!"

"Right. So shut up and look pretty."

After clearing up the mess and making a cake twice as good as the one before, they spent the rest of the day playing videogames until evening when Tamaki had to leave, having promised his grandmother that he would have dinner with her.

"Thank you, Hikaru."

"For what?"

"For making this one of the best birthdays I've ever had."

"What? I only botched two cakes and played Assassin's Creed… not really praise-worthy."

Tamaki smiled kindly. "Thank you anyway." He said, leaning in and kissing Hikaru who raised an eyebrow.

"You're going to be late for your grandma."

"Nope." Tamaki said, not moving.

"What do you mean, 'Nope'? You're going to be late."

"Nope, that was the incorrect reply."

"Heh?" He said before he realised. "Ooh…" He grinned. "Chez nous, c'est quatre"

"Yup." Tamaki said, kissing him three more times.

"Yup."

A/N: Awesome. Nine pages long. Heh. XD Except most of that is the gaps…. /shot.