The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: This is the final chapter of OFUD, ever. Finally, it is complete after a whopping two years! Oh, and this is Chapter 69 (quit sniggering at the back!) I think ff.net has screwed up my chapters. Or perhaps it could be a 'missing' chapter that could resurface some time in the future…who knows?

Quorky: You, obviously, since you are the author.

Shut up!

Quorky: 69…what an appropriate number for you.

Chapter 69

  Nadia sat outside Android Seventeen's office, glancing around at the organised waiting room anxiously. Normally, Nadia would not have been fazed by waiting to see the headmaster of OFUD, but given the circumstances in which she had been brought here she was becoming quite worried. It didn't help that she had no idea as to why she was here and she was almost certain that they had been keeping her waiting so long to psyche her out. Why, she did not know, yet she figured it could not be anything good.

  Her head snapped up at the sound of a door opening quietly. Seventeen stood in the doorway of his office and beckoned her in. Walking past him, she noticed his narrowed eyes and overall unpleasant demeanour.

 "Take a seat." The headmaster ordered monotonously and Nadia complied instantaneously. Seventeen walked behind his own desk and sat down in the grey, plush chair. "I take it you know why you're here." It was more of a statement than a question, which caused Nadia to hesitate before answering.

"Uh…no…" She drawled out.

"Go on, take a guess." Seventeen smiled for the first time since Nadia had entered the office, but it was not a pleasant smile. In fact, Nadia was sure she would have preferred him to continue scowling at her.

"You wanted to have hot, sweaty sex with me?" The dark haired girl grinned foolishly as she said this, realising it was the wrong thing to do and say as soon as she noticed Seventeen's deepened scowl.

"This is not a joke, Miss Goodyear! I hope you realise what you have done is entirely serious, even more so if it had happened in your world. You were given an excellent opportunity in attending this school, yet you continuously disregard rules-"

"But I haven't broken any rules!" It was lie, Nadia knew, yet it seemed small and insignificant. After all, she'd only broken a few rules, surely. Seventeen merely raised an eyebrow and opened up his drawer, rummaging through it for a short second. He produced a large, musty yellow file and dropped it onto his desk, where it landed with a deafening 'thud'.

"This, Miss Goodyear, is a log of all the rules you have broken over the duration of your stay at the university." He spoke as he flipped mindlessly through the often crumpled and creased pieces of paper with different scrawling on each one.

"Wow, I would've thought it…" Nadia trailed off as she realised she was thinking aloud, yet Seventeen had heard enough.

"Oh, does this not do justice for your escapades?" Seventeen snarled, obviously highly annoyed. "Well, let me tell you, this is just your file. We have had to put together an entirely different one for your united rule breaking with that crazy, red haired accomplice of yours."

Nadia thought it quite strange that no one had ever described Yoli that way, yet it was a perfect description of her best friend. She watched apprehensively as Seventeen pulled yet another file from his drawer, this one a deep red and much thicker than the yellow one. A large hazard warning sign had been drawn colourfully on the front, which offended Nadia slightly, before she realised it had probably been Vegeta. Upon thinking this, her opinion of the small picture changed dramatically, and she noticed how accurate and impressive it really was.

"Painting other students' rooms red, blackmailing pre-teens to take pornographic photographs, trespassing on the forbidden corridor, shouting obscenities in Bulma's, Trunks', Goku's, and Gohan's lessons, encouraging Miss Smelt to make sexual advances towards Cell, not to mention your cloud that often flies under the influence of alcohol…"

"George's alcoholism is not my fault!" Nadia said defensively. "Besides, he's sober now."

"Mhmmm." Seventeen didn't sound convinced. "Starting numerous food fights in the canteen, the huge war between the Vegeta and Goku clubs, wghich I know for a fact yourself and Yolanda were to blame for, almost poisoning Vegeta with some peculiar concoction…"

"Well he shouldn't have made me and Yoli into his personal slaves!" Nadia tried defending herself again, but the headmaster just sat backwards in his chair, a complacent expression on his face that seemed to mock Nadia.

"The fact is, you have had a blatant disregard for the rules since your first visit here. I am surprised that you have not been expelled up until now, but your recent stunt has simply astounded myself and the rest of the staff. We certainly did not expect it." Seventeen shook his head ruefully. "Except Vegeta, he seemed quite proud." The headmaster added in a slight undertone.

Nadia listened intently. 'Expelled up until now?' She thought, incredibly confused. 'Recent stunt?'

Seventeen stood and looked almost regretful. "Your belongings have already been packed, Miss Goodyear. Your cloud will be arriving for you shortly. Let's hope, as you said earlier, he is sober."

"What?" Nadia was still confused and felt she had missed something important. "Are you expelling me?!" She asked in disbelief, her dark eyes widening as Seventeen gave a curt nod. "Follow me, please."

"But I haven't done anything!" Nadia protested.

"Threatening a member of staff with death is a very serious matter, Miss Goodyear. We have solid proof. Lying will not help your case."

Nadia stood in front of the huge gates of the university. The last time she was here, she had been on the opposite side and it had been two years ago. The time seemed to have simply flown by. She had so many memories, yet they were all jumbled and ran together, making the time period twisted and dramatically decreased. The dark haired girl looked down at her luggage. Her life at the University of Dragon Ball Z had been packed tightly into two suitcases, which the headmaster was getting ready to put into tiny capsules.

"I didn't do anything." Nadia said quietly for what seemed like the thousandth time. Seventeen gave a resonated sigh. "Miss Goodyear, every single computer in this university has an individual, unique number. The notes were undoubtedly from your computer."

"But I told you…" She trailed off as a light bulb suddenly switched on above her head, quite literally, yet her mind was too busy to notice it properly. "Yoli!"

"We realised that yourself and your friend always work together, which is why we are waiting for her. She, too, is to be expelled."

"But it wasn't me!" Nadia repeated. "It was her!" Suddenly, her voice became very bitter as she noticed a familiar figure walking towards them, with Vegeta and Piccolo on either side of her.

"Nadia, I've told them it wasn't you, but they don't believe me!" Yoli said defensively, her green eyes watery with unshed tears.

"Yoli, I'm being expelled!" Nadia fumed. "Why did you do it? What was the fucking point?"

"To scare the shit out of him?" Yoli asked dumbly. "C'mon Nadia, it's Kakkarot." She shot a glare at Goku. "He doesn't care, he's used to it!" She added, oblivious to Goku's shocked and offended expression.

"Stop being a smart arse! I hope you realise what you've done? I don't want to go back! I haven't passed yet! I can't write fanfiction anymore!"

"Nadia, I'm sorry, but-"

"But nothing! You've screwed this up for me! You're so fucking selfish!" Nadia yelled, ignoring reprimands from Seventeen. "I didn't listen to you when you were headmaster, like fuck I'm gonna listen to you now."

"You think I wanna go back to my crappy home?" Yoli screamed back, equally as angry. Nadia didn't bother replying, she had noticed the familiar trail of George. Plus, they were zigzagging, which only meant one thing;

"'Allo Nadia me best mate man!" George's slurred words could be heard painfully clear.

"George, you're pissed." Nadia stated.

"Yah, I was boring sober. But now I is extra entertaining for ya journey home! Did I not tell you that you'd make an impact? The first person to ever be expelled! Beautiful!" George sounded positively delighted.

"Cheers, George." Nadia clambered onto her cloud, taking her capsules from Seventeen. It looked like he was going to say something, but decided against it.  Instead he nodded firmly. "The school will be notified of your departures in the morning. I'm sure you both will be missed." He spoke rigidly.

"Laters." Nadia said dismissively.

"Nadia-"

"Forget it, Yoli." The dark haired girl didn't bother looking at her former friend. "I thought we were friends. Best friends." Her voice became sad, quieter. "Home, George." She almost whispered, to which her cloud complied, whooshing away at an alarmingly fast rate.

A Week Later

  Sat at her computer screen, Nadia cursed AOL for a fifth time. It was being painfully slow. Plus, the past week, she had been in a foul mood. No one understood. They thought she had been excluded from a crappy horse riding school, not the best university there ever was, where she could interact with people she felt understood her. Where she was learning things she was really interested in, and where she had met the best people she knew she would ever meet.

   A soft 'ding' brought Nadia's attention back to the screen. She had received an anonymous instant message. She knew it was most likely to be an advertisement for penis enlargement, or perhaps a link to some 'college girl's personal porn site', yet she still couldn't help being curious.

SkittlesIsTasty: Hey

Nadia looked at the simple message for a good length of time. It was possible it could be a coincidence, then again…

ILuvSpandex: Yoli?

SkittlesIsTasty: Damn…the name gave it away, eh?

ILuvSpandex: What do you want?

  Nadia typed this response quite harshly. She still had not forgiven Yoli for being the cause of her getting expelled. In fact, she hadn't heard from her since then.

SkittlesIsTasty: To apologise.

 Nadia contemplated putting something such as 'It's too late', but changed her mind. Another 'ding' interrupted her thoughts.

SkittlesIsTasty: Had a brainwave last night. But first, I have a file to send you.

True to her word, Nadia was asked permission to be sent a file. She accepted and watched the loading bar, quite curious as to what it was. Opening the file, a huge grin spread on her face. There, emblazoned on her computer screen, was Vegeta, in all his wondrous, naked glory in the shower.

ILuvSpandex: Where did you get this?! It rocks!

SkittlesIsTasty: Thought I'd take a souvenir…

ILuvSpandex: Wow…

ILuvSpandex: So…brainwave?

SkittlesIsTasty: Have you forgiven me?

ILuvSpandex: If you can guarantee more nekkidness…

SkittlesIsTasty: It's a certain!

ILuvSpandex: Then yes!

SkittlesIsTasty: Well…I had this dream last night, and it just gave me the perfect idea on how we can smuggle back into the University! We'll need your alcoholic cloud, two orange gi suits and black hair dye for me.

   As Nadia read those words on her computer screen, she grinned widely. Yoli made her feel how she did back in the University and lifted her sombre mood. Typing away on her keyboard, the grin still stayed upon her face.

ILuvSpandex: No problem!

A/N2: And that's a wrap!