Truth Or Dare With Eragon REMASTERED V2.
Chapter One
Disclaimer: Blah Blah Blah...
This Chapter Is Rated: K+
Eragon was in a rather sour mood.
He had departed Alagaësia several weeks ago, and his final moments with Arya were still repeating in his head.
He just couldn't forget her.
After they had left each other on that gloomy pebble beach, the ship had sailed far down the Edda river.
They had passed many leagues of seemingly endless plains, and there was nothing remarkable at all about it. There were occasional heard of deer and other grazing animals, but besides that, the land held little life. It seemed to Eragon that Alagaësia had been far more interesting and lively than that empty expanse of land.
After the plains came a strange forest. It was full of mystifying sounds and plants, but all life seemed hidden from them. Occasionally one of the elves would spot a pair of yellow eyes peering at them through the humid fog, but then they would disappear. It was even hard for Saphira to find food among those woods, even with the help of Orik's magic ring.
And after the endless foggy woods came a sea. The river ended near the coast, and split into dozens of smaller streams, each of which dumped into the salty ocean.
The elves managed to pull the boat out of the water, and with the help of Saphira moved it across the shallow streams and into the ocean.
And then they started again. They sailed out into the expanses of the new sea, hoping to find an island, or other outpost before they drifted to far away from Alagaësia. But soon they became hopelessly lost, pulled into the green depths of the foreign ocean, many miles away from any land. What they would find there only the Gods new...
Eragon sighed as he stood upright. He had been leaning against the rail of the ship, and dreaming as his eyes took in the empty sea. He smiled briefly as Saphira swam by, but then he sank back into his depressed thoughts.
Little one... Saphira rumbled, It is not healthy for you to be feeling like this!
I know... It's just that I miss her so much...
Saphira hummed in response, and then was quite for a while as she tried to think of something to help lift her riders spirit.
I know you miss Arya, and I understand how you feel... I miss Fírnen just as much you know...
Are you sure you know what it feels like? Eragon replied, suddenly becoming upset, I loved Arya for much longer than you have loved Fírnen! And besides, that was a one night stand anyway!
Saphira grumbled defensively, and swam up next to the boat so she could look her rider in the eye.
It was not a one night stand! We might have mated, we were really in love!
I'm sure you were in love... I just wish I still had Arya... I wish I could have at least kissed her... just once...
Eragon grew quiet for a while then, and Saphira kept her peace. But it was not long before she was making suggestions again.
How about you go and make out with another one of the elf women? She suggested, I have a feeling that will make you feel better. How about the one with the blonde hair and the blue eyes? Or maybe the brunette with the nice curves?
I DON'T WANT TO MAKE OUT WITH A RANDOM ELF! Eragon screamed, I WANT ARYA!
Saphira growled at Eragon in a agitated manner, and splashed water on him with her tail. After that she swam away, and left him alone.
Eragon was quite for a while more, until he heard something. It sounded like music.
It was faint in the beginning, but it steadily got louder. Eragon looked around, and saw that the other elves were hearing it too. He felt his heart beat faster as the music became louder.
Glaedr! Eragon shouted to the old dragon, Do you hear this music? What is it?
It took the old dragon some time to respond, but when he did, Eragon could feel the fear emitting from the golden dragons heart of hearts.
It's the JAWS theme song! Eragon, you must find the source of the music, and stop it! The JAWS theme song attract Nidhwal's like crazy!
Eragon visibly whitened at the mention of the giant sea serpent dragon related monsters.
He immediately began running around the ship looking for the source of the music. And all the while, the music became louder and louder.
When he finally found the source of the music, he was in disbelief. There, under the deck, were three random minstrels. They were all wearing strange hats, that said 'mariachi' on them.
"HEY YOU GUYS!" Eragon shouted, "STOP PLAYING THAT MUSIC YOUR GOING TO GET US ALL KILLED!"
The mariachi band did not seem to understand him, and one of the guitarists said something in a foreign tongue.
"No entiendo su lenguaje extraño, señor, ¿usted habla Espanole?" the guitarist asked.
"I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR WEIRD LANGUAGE! JUST PLEASE SHUT UP!" Eragon replied.
The mariachi band looked insulted by Eragon's words, and they frowned angrily at him, and began playing faster and louder.
"cómo te atreves a insultar a nuestra cultura española! ir al infierno que el hombre blanco poco!"
Eragon tried to ask the band for forgiveness, but they just became more and more angry. Soon, the music was pounding louder than ever, drowning out all other sounds.
And out in the distance, and giant shape began to appear. A nidhwal broke the surface of the water, blasting a geyser boiling hot steam into the air through it's blowhole. It's depth less black eyes targeted the boat, and it began to swim over, moving faster every moment, closing in fast.
"ABANDON SHIP!" Eragon screamed, "EVERYBODY RUN!"
They made it just in time. The Nidhwal slammed into the elf boat, and smashed it to pieces while the elves, and the dragon headed cyborg jumped off. The elves cried in dismay, and Saphira whined as the boat slowly sank, all of the Eldunarí, and dragon eggs on board.
There was no time to save them, as the giant sea monster was searching the ruins for food.
So Saphira picked Eragon out of the water, flying him up high where he was safe from the sea. From up there they watched as the elves were pulled under the water one by one. Soon the entire boat was gone, and only debris remained floating on the surface of the water.
Saphira circled for a time more, until they felt a mind touch theirs. It was Glaedr.
Eragon did you make it out?
Eragon was shocked to hear his old master speaking to him. The boat had all but disappeared under the waves, and he presumed that everything on board had perished.
Master, where are you?
I am under the water, along with the rest of the boat. Some of us already floated to the surface, but it will take a while for the rest of us.
Eldunarí float?
As a matter of fact the eggs will also float, but most of them are still trapped on the boat. I will use my energy to pull us up tot he surface, but it will take a long time. It is difficult to find anything when you have no body.
Eragon thought over his masters words, and it soon dawned on him that Saphira would only be able to circle in the air so long before she became exhausted, and had to land again. Glaedr noticed this two, and told them they had to leave.
Master are you sure? Saphira asked.
I am sure... You can't land near hear with that accursed sea monster around, and you must find some place to land far away from here. We will get the eggs to safety somehow.
So reluctantly Eragon and Sapphira left the wreck of the once proud elven ship.
They flew for what seemed like forever, but eventually Sapphira became tired. Eragon began to feed her with his own strength, but soon he was exhausted too.
Eragon was barley conscious when they hit the salty water, but he was to tired to do anything about it. For what could he do? They had flown for leagues, and leagues, seeing no sign of land anywhere. And so Eragon let the ocean swallow him, losings his breath as the water took it from him.
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When Eragon finally opened his eyes, the first thing he noticed was how warm it was. It was warm, and soft, and very comfortable indeed.
Is this heaven? Have I passed into the void of the dwarf gods?
Not quite... A familiar mind said, but you had a rather close brush to going there...
Eragon wondered who could be talking to him. So he decided to open his eyes and find out.
A mass of curly brown hair entered his view, accompanied by the clicking of six needles all knitting at the same time.
Well, if Angela is here I must have gone to hell...
Angela frowned at Eragon, and then squinted her eyes.
"Your not suppose to be hear you know... my prophecy clearly said that you were to leave Alagaësia, and never return!"
"And your upset that I have returned?" Eragon asked.
"Well, not upset, not really, it has been rather boring around here without a dragon rider running around and stirring up trouble... and I suppose we will have to cancel the 'no more Eragon in Alagaësia' party, but bedsides that, I suppose everyone kind of missed you... kinda..."
Eragon nodded slowly, only able to take in about half the words the herbalist had said.
"How did I get back here anyway?"
"Well, apparently, you and the other elves went so far west, that you circumnavigated the world, and ended up back on the other side of Alagaësia. You should have seen how upset Arya was when she found you guys washed up on the shore!"
He sluggishly reached out from his mind, and searched for Saphira.
He found her soon enough, but her mind was blocked. He tried to gain entryway, and when he did, he found that her thoughts muddled, and fuzzy.
Saphira... Whats wrong with you?
Ohhhhhhhhohhhhohhhhhh... nothing... little one... The dragon slurred, I'm just enjoying someee of this meaad that Nasud...aaa... gavie meee...
Eragon frowned as he realized that his dragon was drunk. Bad things happened when dragons got drunk.
Saphira sensed these thoughts, and disapproval emanated from her. She was about to say something else, but in her drunken haze, she cut the connection between their minds.
Angela seemed to understand what was transpiring between them, and gave Eragon a knowing look.
"You better get down to that dragon of yours... a drunk dragon in a flammable city always means trouble..." She muttered, "And don't get yourself hurt, drowned, burnt, or do anything else stupid... I've patched you up far to many times now..."
Eragon nodded his head in agreement, and rolled out of the bed. The room titled around him, and he almost fell back down. Eragon frowned as he realized how sick he felt.
I could do with a good drink right now... Alcohol always solves everything...
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AN: Hey everyone! How do you do? Do you do do good? Do you you do good?
Good I hope.
Anyway, I dedicated to redo my original truth or dare story! It's not an EXACT copy of the first one, But It has been updated so that it makes sense in our post-inheritance world. And also, It just felt like this little subsection of the fanfiction world needed a little cheering up after that terrible ending of book 4. (Review if you are one of the many infected with post-inheritance-depression-syndrome!)
Also, I bet your wondering why I didn't just update the original story.
Well, that is because, I have plans to make this version much grander and funnier than the original version. And so, instead of getting rid of the original, I wrote up this brand new chapter, and am going to re post all of the original chapters, along with some extra bonus chapters, and some other stuff! I will try to update every five days, so you can expect the next chapter on the 25th.
So I hope you enjoy, and Don't forget to review!
'YO DAWG WHAZ FRILL?..." Sorry, I don't speak stupid.