Written Kitten

By: 1000th Ghost

Once upon a time, there was Arnold and there was Helga. They were so freakin' awesome. One day, they went to an ice cream store. They ate ice cream. Of course, as any Hey Arnold! fan knows, "ice cream" is a total euphemism for ARNOLD. So, if Helga ate ice cream, that implies something quite different than her eating a delicious frozen treat. Although it might in fact have been delicious. Don't ask me. I wouldn't know. After the consumption of said ice cream, they went for a walk in the park. Arnold got down on one knee and was like, "Marry me, yo". Helga was like, "Omg, okay, I luvs you football head". Some random person (let's say...hmm...Chuck Norris) walked by and was like "You can't get married! You're nine!" Helga and Arnold were like "Neah!" and Chuck Norris exploded. That's right, because Arnold's and Helga's love is more unrealistically fantastical than Chuck Norris. Then it was Thanksgiving (or, like, close enough, it'll be Thanksgiving a week from today), so they decided to go bother Mr. Simmons. Mr. Simmons was like "I'm gay!" and Helga and Arnold were like "We're not!" so they hid in the little room under his stairs and screwed each other senseless. Until Harry Potter was like "Get out of my room, yo."

The End