Author Note: Originally written for a prompt on comment_fic at livejournal.

Priority

"Hypothetically, Jack," says Ianto, hovering in the doorway to Jack's office, "what if I didn't make anymore coffee?"

Jack fixes a seriously expression onto his face before looking up from his paperwork, which contrary to popular belief he does actually do. Sometimes.

"Well," he says, "first I'd have to fire you, so then there'd be retcon, obviously. Then I'd set you up as the head of your own coffee shop and make you believe that was your life's vocation before writing into Owen's job description that he'd have to collect our usual order from you at the usual time."

He leans back in his chair and lets himself grin.

"I wouldn't stop dating you though."

"Ah." Ianto finally steps into his office properly and places a requisition form in front of him. "Better make this a priority then."

"A new coffee machine?" says Jack, frowning. "Why, what happened to the one we already have?"

"There were a group of idiots playing basketball in the Hub last night, sir. If you happen to know who the instigator was," says Inato, placing both hands flat on Jack's desk and leaning in, "I would appreciate it if you'd pass on how unacceptable the practise is. I know some people don't especially mind if the Rift Manipulator explodes and the world ends, but apparently damage to the coffee machine can get me fired."

"Right." Jack closes his eyes. "I'll have words."