Wildly, wildly, beats the heart
With a rush of love like a mountain stream.
Wildly, wildly, play your part
As free as a wild bird's dream.

A waning half moon shone through the window of Sirius's rented room, illuminating the travel journal, open against his knees. Although it was only the first week of August, Sirius thought he could feel the season beginning to turn. Lughnasadh, Remus had called the day; the halfway point between solstice and equinox, when the summer began its long, slow slide into autumn.

Sirius's pen hovered over the last blank page of the journal. More than two months of thoughts, notes, sketches, and drafts of letters filled its pages - a magpie account of his strange and wonderful journey into unknown territory, and the marvels he had found there. A smile touched his lips as he wrote down the thought that had occurred to him earlier that day while discussing possible meanings of Pictish symbol stones with Remus over lunch. All that remained was to tell Remus about it.

Here I go, he wrote, and closed the journal, caressing the leather binding briefly before setting it beside the granite pebble on the nightstand.

He dressed by moonlight, nervous excitement fizzing in his belly, and hurried down the stairs, into the night.

The window of Remus's room was open, but no light showed.

"Remus!" Sirius called up in a loud whisper. "Remus! Are you awake?"

The Scot's face appeared, framed by the window. They shared a grin before he vanished again. After a moment, the front door opened, and a shadow slipped out to greet Sirius on the garden path with a kiss.

"I thought you might come tonight," said Remus. He had recovered from his recent bout of illness, and was looking and feeling much better.

Fingers laced together, they hurried through the darkness, exchanging smiles but few words. There was no need; they both knew where they were headed. The Den was a patchwork of silver light and deep shadow. They had to feel their way carefully down the stone steps and into the hollow. The rushing sound of water and leaves surrounded them as they tumbled onto the grass at the foot of the prayer tree, kissing and laughing.

"Stop for a second," Sirius said breathlessly. "There's something I need to tell you."

Remus blinked at him expectantly, and another volley of giggles burst from Sirius's lips. He could not seem to stop. His facial contortions as he tried to control his laughter set Remus off again, and they gave themselves up to a moment of helpless mirth.

"You've already told me you're queer," chortled Remus. "But I would have guessed that by noo, anyway. You arena pregnant, and I dinna think you're going to propose. What's left?"

Sirius rubbed a hand over his face and gave up. Important as the moment was, it seemed his choice was either to speak his mind in spite of the giggles, or not to tell Remus at all.

"Fuck it," he said, gazing up into Remus's eyes as his chest quaked with nervous laughter. "I love you."

Remus's eyes widened. "What?"

"I love you, Remus," Sirius repeated, sobering.

Remus did not say anything, but his eyes went soft with affection. The kiss he gave Sirius was filled with tenderness, and went on for a very long time.

"I've been thinking," Remus murmured as they broke apart. "Perhaps it's time we rethought this 'no shagging' business."

"Are you sure?" Sirius searched his face. "It's all right if you're not. I can wait."

In answer, Remus rolled on top of him, pressing his hips down so Sirius could feel how hard he was. Sirius moaned into his mouth.

"I'm tired o' waiting," panted Remus. "I want you. Let's go back to your place. We dinna want to wake Auntie Fiona."

"No." Sirius kissed him fiercely. "No, I want to do it here. In the Den."

A slow smile spread across Remus's face, and his hands went immediately to Sirius's fly, unfastening the button as he nibbled at his throat. But Sirius had spent a lot of time and countless self-pleasuring sessions over the past weeks fantasizing about what he would do if he ever again had access to a willing and eager Remus.

"Let me," he whispered, pushing Remus away.

He sat up, back resting against the thick trunk of the prayer tree, and stripped off his shirt, stretching luxuriantly, as Remus's hungry eyes roved over his body. Sirius's hands fell to the zipper of his jeans, and he raised his hips to slide them off, along with his underwear. He sat naked under the tree, legs apart, stroking himself as he stared into Remus's eyes.

"Come here," he said softly.

Remus grinned and crawled toward him on hands and knees, until Sirius told him, "That's close enough. Take your clothes off."

The Scot knelt between his splayed thighs and drew his shirt over his head, pushing his pants down to his knees. Sirius allowed himself a moment to revel in the sight of Remus's parted lips, heaving chest, and erect cock, before reaching for the other man's hand, drawing him close and turning him to sit with his back to Sirius's chest. His own erection rubbed delightfully against the small of Remus's back, but that was not the point of the exercise. He ran his hands down Remus's thighs, urging him to kick his jeans off, then back up his sides and over his chest, enjoying the skin-to-skin contact and having free access to Remus's body for the first time in two months.

Sirius touched him slowly and lightly, all over, kissing and nuzzling at his neck and murmuring in his ear as Remus's head tipped back with a sigh to rest on his shoulder. His fingers trailed up Remus's arms and over his shoulders, gliding down his chest and belly, making him shiver. When at long last he wrapped a loose hand around Remus's cock, feeling the slide of his foreskin on his palm and the slippery bead of precome that leaked from the slit, Remus made a needy, sobbing sound, thrusting up into his fist, hands clenching convulsively at Sirius's thighs.

"Do you like this?" Sirius asked, tongue teasing the shell of Remus's ear as he lazily jerked the Scot off.

"Aye," Remus sighed. "But w-what about you?"

"Hmmm," Sirius mused. "That's a good question. I'll be very interested to see what you feel inspired to do to me in a bit. But for now -" he continued, planting a soft kiss on his boyfriend's shoulder, "- give me a minute to appreciate what I almost didn't have."

He watched the play of expressions across Remus's face, listening to the small sounds the man made at his touch. This was what he had been wanting - to see Remus in ecstasy, without the distraction of seeking to satisfy his own physical desires.

"I want to draw you like this," he murmured. "You're so fucking beautiful, Remus. Been thinking about having you like this for weeks."

Remus squirmed against him, moaning, and Sirius grinned, realizing that his words were having almost as much of an effect on the other man as his touch.

"Just imagining your cock in my hand gets me so hot," he whispered in the Scot's ear. "Fuck, everything about you gets me hot. The other day, when we were making out on the sofa, did you know I came? I did. You slid your hand down over my ass, and I had a fucking orgasm."

Sirius was rewarded with a desperate whimpering sound.

"Mmm, you're close, aren't you? You're going to come in my hand, and I'm going to watch you."

"Sirius -" Remus moaned shakily, thrusting against his palm.

"I love it when you say my name like that. Come for me, Remus."

He tightened his grip, stroking quick and rough, eyes fixed hungrily on the Scot's face.

"Oh! Oh! Sirius!"

Remus's body convulsed as he climaxed. Sirius held him tightly until the spasms passed, an arm locked across his chest, mouth pressed to Remus's shoulder. When his boyfriend's body relaxed against him in post-orgasmic bonelessness, Sirius sighed in satisfaction and nuzzled Remus's ear.

"So beautiful," he whispered again.

It took Remus a moment to recover, for which Sirius was grateful. The sight and sound of Remus losing control had brought him very close to the brink, and he did not want to finish too quickly, should the Scot feel inspired to reciprocate. They reclined against the smooth bark of the tree, breathing together, Sirius's fingers laced with Remus's over his boyfriend's pounding heart.

"I wasna expecting that," sighed Remus.

"Was it good?"

Remus laughed softly. "Aye, it was."

Sirius grinned. "I hoped you'd like it. It's the one kind of sex I know I'm good at. You'll have to teach me everything else."

The Scot gave a bawdy chuckle, turning over on hands and knees to kiss him, biting and nibbling at Sirius's lips. "I look forwards to the challenge. You have a mouth that looks made for sucking cock. I could teach you a little about that right noo, unless there's something else you'd like?"

Sirius ignored the pleasant shiver that the words sent through his belly, and gave Remus his best come-hither look. "Surprise me."

Remus sat back on his heels, looking thoughtful for a moment. Then a wicked gleam lit his eye. "Turn around."

Sirius raised his eyebrows.

"I want to test something. I promise it willna hurt."

Mystified and slightly nervous, Sirius turned and allowed Remus to position him, kneeling, legs apart, hands braced against the trunk of the tree. He felt very exposed. But then he felt the warmth of Remus's body against his back, and his eyes fell closed as the man's fingers ghosted down his sides, making him shiver. He started much as Sirius had, touching him softly everywhere except between his legs. Sirius moaned. It felt glorious to have Remus's touch on his bare skin after so long.

Nails raked slowly up the backs of his thighs as Remus blazed a trail of kisses down his spine. Then Remus's hands were massaging his ass, and he was nipping and biting playfully at the firm flesh, making Sirius gasp and squeak with pleasure. But that was nothing compared to the startled yelp Sirius gave a moment later when Remus's tongue swept down the cleft between his buttocks.

"R-Remus?" he gasped.

The Scot did not stop, and soon he was lapping and teasing at Sirius's anus as if there was nothing in the world he would rather be doing, busy tongue playing havoc with Sirius's senses. Sirius had never imagined such a thing - could not believe that Remus wanted to do it - nor could he believe how incredible it felt to have such a filthy, forbidden thing done to him. He moaned and whimpered shamelessly, pushing back against his boyfriend's mouth.

After a few minutes, Remus pulled away. "I thought so," he said smugly. "You're verra sensitive there, are you no?" He ran a finger over the saliva-slicked pucker, making Sirius shiver. "I think you could come just from me touching you there."

"Oh!" Sirius gasped as Remus bent to his work once more, this time pressing the bead of his tongue stud right up inside the tight ring of muscle and flicking it in and out. Sirius clung to the tree, eyes squeezed shut, desperately hoping that Remus was right. He could not remember ever coming before without some touch or pressure on his cock. Remus's teasing tongue had brought him right up to the edge, and Sirius felt if he did not come soon, he might die of pleasure. "Please -" he begged.

Perversely, Remus stopped what he was doing, leaving Sirius panting and dizzy. He heard the Scot move away, and turned his head to see Remus rummaging for something in the pocket of his jeans. Then he was back, kneeling behind Sirius, arms wrapped around his chest, nuzzling his neck, as his well-lubed erection ground against Sirius's ass.

"My mouth was getting tired," Remus murmured in his ear, "and all those sexy sounds you were making made me hard again, so I thought we might try something else for a bit."

"Remus - I - um," Sirius's voice quavered with sudden uncertainty.

"Dinna fash," Remus soothed, kissing him just below the ear. "I willna fuck you unless you ask me to do it, and I willna do it without protection." His voice dropped to a low growl. "But gods, I want to."

A thrill of excitement and fear shivered through Sirius's belly as Remus's cock rubbed against him, foreskin dragging deliciously across his hole.

"Is this all right?" asked Remus.

"Yes," Sirius hissed. "Please, Remus -"

"Please what?"

"Need to come," he whined.

"Mmmm, soon, love." Remus nuzzled him some more. "If I canna get you off this way, I'll suck you, after."

Sirius was lost to anything but the hot hardness pressing and sliding against him, and the sound of Remus's increasingly ragged breathing in his ear, his vocalizations reduced to a babble of semi-coherent pleading.

"Need - Remus - please - now - god, please!"

"Christ, Sirius," Remus groaned. "You're going to make me come, if you keep that up."

The thrust of his hips against Sirius's increased, and Sirius could feel himself teetering on the knife-edge, but he just - could - not - get - over.

"Please - need more -" he begged.

Remus swore and jerked back, wrapping a hand around his own cock. Sirius felt the blunt, slippery head nudge his anus. The breath caught in his throat and time seemed to stop, poised so close to the brink of an act which filled Sirius with both terror and burning lust. And then Remus was coming, moaning his name. Sirius felt spunk spurt over his hole. It was exciting. He wanted more. Instinctively, he thrust his hips back.

The pulsing head of Remus's cock breached him, and with a startled cry, Sirius came, hard, against the tree and onto the grass at his knees. Remus made a guttural sound and grasped Sirius's hips, holding him still to prevent any deeper penetration as waves of pleasure shuddered through them both.

When the spasms passed, Remus carefully eased out of him, turning Sirius in his arms and gathering him close against his heaving, sweat-slick chest.

"Shite. I'm sorry, love," he panted. "I didna mean to - We should've used protection for that. Did I hurt you?"

Still feeling stunned, Sirius shook his head. "It was - you made me come."

"I felt you." Remus sounded awed. "I didna ken it would feel like that."

"But - haven't you done it before?" asked Sirius, surprised.

"It's been done to me," he admitted, "but I havena done it to anyone else."

Sirius nuzzled his shoulder. Up until that night, he had thought of being penetrated as something shameful, scary, dirty, and more than likely painful as well. But now - "We could try it again sometime, if you like," he said shyly.

"I'll bear that in mind," Remus murmured before capturing his lips in a prolonged kiss.

They lay on the grass in the faint moonlight for some time, kissing and touching and whispering soft words to one another amid the sounds of flowing water and rushing leaves.

"What happens now?" asked Sirius quietly as Remus dropped tender kisses onto his collarbone. He already knew the answer. Summer would be ending soon. His time with Remus was growing short. By the time the moon was full again, he would be home, and a month from today, he would be starting at Harvard. It seemed like part of someone else's life.

The Scot lay back in the grass, pulling Sirius close in his arms. "You'll be away home soon."

"Yeah." Sirius sighed regretfully. "Don't want to, though."

"Well, you have things to sort out with your family and uni, and you canna do that from here. But you'll come back, aye?"

"Of course I will." Sirius kissed him fiercely. "You think I wouldn't? If I can't transfer at the semester, I'll still come visit for Christmas."

Remus sighed. "It seems like such a long time from noo."

"I know," said Sirius. "I'll miss you. When I come back, I probably won't let you out of bed for a week."

That made Remus laugh and kiss him again. "Well, there isna so much else to do in Scotland in the winter. I dinna ken what my parents will say, though, if that's how you mean to keep Christmas with them."

"Don't worry," Sirius grinned. "Your family will love me. I can be very charming when I try."

"Aye, that you can," Remus said fondly. "I dinna ken what my family will make o' you, but -" he hesitated for a second, looking as if the words teetering on his tongue frightened him a little. "I love you, Sirius. At least, I think I do."

Sirius's grin softened, and he kissed him. "Say it again?"

"I love you, you wee fool," Remus chuckled, returning the kiss with interest. "Now can we go back to your place? I'm freezing my bollocks off out here, and I dinna think either of us want that."

"Definitely not," Sirius laughed, getting up and holding out a hand to help Remus to his feet. "Don't worry; I can think of a few good ways to warm them up."

Glossary:

Lughnasadh (lu-na-sa) - pagan holiday marking the beginning of harvest season

Song: "Golden, Golden" by Andy M. Stewart

The author, viewing a misty Highland village, on the way to a small distillery. (July 2008)