I lie awake
waiting for that last shred to fall apart,
and leave me open and bare
for it to fill with dirt
and make me feel dirty.

But it never came
my door never opened
for mean eyes stare.

I lie awake
waiting for someone to say he left
that he didn't love me
like I love him.

But it never came
the haunting words never made it to my ears
no one let light into my dead room.

Until...
it finally happened
the light flooded my room
making it shine.

Someone stepped in
their steps silent.
They closed the door
leaving the room in darkness once again.

It's the one I love,
I can tell,
I can always tell.

There are no anger to his steps,
only a calmness only he can achieve
A blank spot
where emotion never seems to come
leaving him bare.

"Why come,
when you feel
nothing for me?"

A light question
as it passes my lips,
but it holds
more meaning then even I
can comprehend.

"Foolish,
you know nothing of how I feel.
So why even guess
when you have never
gotten it right before?"

His words
like ice
waft across the dead room
filling my heart with pain
and my brain
with ice.

"I guess,
because one day
I hope to get it right."

My head turns,
in this darkness
I cannot see his skin,
his brown eyes.

"Am I right
for once,
or did I
guess wrong,
again?"

There was a shuffle
no steps were heard as he crosses the room
only pressure when he reaches the bed.

"You haven't guessed right,
not today
or tomorrow."

A hand rests on my forehead,
burning my skin
with the heat
coming from it.

"So what is it
that you feel
for me in this
moment?"

I turned my head back
facing the ceiling
once again.

He bends down
his breath fanning over me
as he reaches my ear.

"I meditated,
trying to find
something I was missing.
When I found it
it opened something
buried deep in me."

His hand trailed over my cold skin,
burning it with fire
that he always has.

"For you Raphael,
I care for no one more
or for anyone less.
I feel happy with you,
loved, and
I wish to love in return."

My head turns back to him,
he missing me by mere inches.

I don't see his face
but I feel
as if he is telling the truth.

I see white.
His teeth shining
even when it is dark,
glowing in the nothingness
of my dead room.

"Say it.
I wish to hear
how you really feel
about me."

Fire trails down my shoulder,
over my collar bone
and on
my cold heart.

"I love you."
He whispers,
the fire on my heart thawing me.
"Raphael."

A sigh fills the room,
as I feel
my long winter is over,
finally.

He burned the snow
that rests on me,
and in me,
with his blue flames.

"I love you."
I whispered.
Spring meets us,
giving us balance,
finally.
"Leonardo."