I am pretty much the worst updater in the entire world and I am super (!) sorry to all of you! I'll try to be better in the future, I promise.

Also, thanks for all the reviews and support I'm getting, I never expected so many people to like this!

wow super short chapter is short but i'll probably get back on track with this soon? please don't give up on this thing just yet!

John doesn't sleep often. He makes excuses about it to Dave, Rose and Jade all the time, saying he needs to study, telling them that there's just one more thing he needs to do. They know it's a lie. They're worried about their friend but they don't ever say anything because they know what it's like. They know because they're having the same problem. The four friends have been having sleeping problems since they were thirteen years old because as much as they try and forget during the day, and as much as they try to move on, nothing can erase all of the things they had seen and experienced in the game. Nothing will get rid of the memories, and nothing will make John forget what it was like to see his dad sprawled out beside Rose's mom on the cold stones, blood pooling around them mixing with the black rain falling from the sky.

Especially if those memories are relived every night.

And as john climbs the steps onto the damp roof, the wind and rain hitting his face, he knows what's coming. Knows that when he looks down he'll se his father exactly like he was the first time.

Then suddenly It all becomes a blur and John isn't on the stones anymore and he's flying through space and there's a little nagging voice in the back of him mind telling to go faster go faster oh my god he's coming he's going to kill everyone oh my god!

He's faced with another dead body, but this time he recognizes the purples and blacks of matted, blood soaked clothing as Rose's and she's dead in front of him how did he let this happen she was his responsibility he was the leader this is all his fault.

It changes again and John immediately panics as he's faced with the mangled, bruised body of his ecto-sister and her skin is split open everywhere and she's oozing out blood and John drops to his knees because he can't take it and they're all gone and dead and no no no this isn't real!

The body is changing faster now but john can hardly see behind the tears that he can't hold back and there's Karkat, Vriska, Terezi, Dave-

John took a deep breath of air, his lungs stretching from the sudden action. He could feel tears falling down his cheeks but couldn't wipe them away because of his shaking hands. A terrible feeling was stirring in the pit of his stomach, spreading throughout his entire body and leaving a bitter taste in his mouth.

He laid in his bed for a moment in the dark, trying to calm his erratic heart-beat (which he was pretty sure beating a permanent tattoo against his throat) before everything turned a blinding shade of white. John closed his eyes, pulling his eyebrows together in an attempt to keep out the light.

He couldn't feel what was happening, body completely in shock. All he knew was that one minute he was huddled by himself, and the next he was sobbing into Dave's shirt, clutching the white fabric at his back and shoulders, desperate for some kind of comfort.

Once John had slowed his breathing and his heart, he could hear Dave whispering reassuring words into his ear. He could feel him slowly tracing circles into his back, running his hand though his hair.

They fell asleep in each other's arms; the light still on, but neither of them caring.