I must admit that I do not own anything involving Transformers or Monty Python.

This chapter should take place just before the episode "Speed Metal".

Why Knockout Is Not Allowed to Command Troops

Starscream strutted down the halls of the Nemesis with a smug look on his face. He'd caught Knockout racing amongst the fleshies when he should have been attending to his medical duties. As punishment for being so neglectful the seeker had commanded him to temporarily take charge of a new group of Vehicons, and to leave all his normal duties to Breakdown. Starscream knew that muscle car hated the strict military life, and loathed having to abandon his racing and preferred work for something so mundane. Right now the seeker was on his way to inspect Knockout's troop. He was enjoying the thought of making the medic squirm under inspection.

He walked into the hangar where he'd told Knockout to assemble his Vehicons. The troops were arranged in two lines of four, their servos clasped behind their backs and pedes spread apart in a proper military stance. Knockout stood in front, his white face impassive as Starscream approached.

"Well, I see you've managed to get them to stand correctly at least. Now let's see if you were able to teach them anything else." The silver seek spoke mockingly. Knockout said nothing, though his face twitched slightly. Starscream turned to the new recruits.

"Let's try a drill, shall we? Squad, camp it, up!"

The Vehicons brought their pedes together, a good start. Then started to march forward.

Ooh, get her! Whoops!

They turned right, put one servo on their hip, held another straight forward, and put swung their hips as the walked.

I've got your number ducky.

They switched servos.

You couldn't afford me dear. Two, Three.

They gestured to themselves and then turned forward again.

I'd scratch your eyes out!

They placed a servo on the shoulder of the person to their right, and at the next word started kicking like they were in a chorus line.

Don't come the brigadier bit with us, dear,

We all know where you've been, you military fairy!

With the last few words the troops saluted and then pirouetted to face backward. They quietly counted as they pranced, then spun forward. Once again they had their a servo straight out and swayed as they walked.

Whoops, don't look now girls,
The major's just minced in
With that dolly color sergeant,

They turned right again.

"Two Three!" Knockout shouted.

Ooh!

All the troops did a little dip, turned forward, and resumed their beginning stance.

For a minute, all Starscream could do was stare in shock. His jaw was dangerously close to coming off it's hinges. He sputtered for a few moments before turning his gaze to Knockout; the insufferable medic wore a mischievous smirk.

"Good job boys." He clapped a few times. The seeker closed in on Knockout, invading his personal space.

"You are going to spend weeks on cleaning duty for this!" He hissed at him, before storming away. The medic cringed at the thought of what that would do to his paint job, but at least 'Lord' Starscream would never assign him to training duty again. He turned to the very confused Vehicons.

"Don't mind him boys. He's just jealous that he can't inspire such enthusiasm in the troops."

Well, there's the first chapter! I hope you found it amusing. :)

This is my first official story on here, so I'd appreciate any feedback you might feel like giving. Thanks for reading!