A/N: Hi! First I'd just like to say this is my first fanfiction, so try not to be too critical(: It's about the Gryffindor sixth years in 1976. This is a Marauder fanfic, about Sirius Black x Marlene McKinnon, and Remus Lupin x Dorcas Meadows.

Ships: Sirius Black x Marlene McKinnon, Remus Lupin x Dorcas Meadows, Mary MacDonald x OC, James Potter x Lily Evans

NEW A/N: I've decided that I'm going to bunch the chapters together by fours. This will make it less daunting when I get farther along in the story and it starts getting to chapter numbers in the 70s. This way it will be less clicking "next".

Enjoy!

The Express

(Marlene McKinnon)

I hate Sirius Black.

Why did he have such a power over me? I couldn't understand it.

I think it started back in 4th year, when he saved me from an evil Slytherin boy who had called me a filthy half blood and shoved me up against a wall. And ever since then we've been friends.

It's not like we'd never talked before. I mean, we're in the same year in the same house, but he's always with James and I'm always with Lily, and those two don't exactly see eye to eye right now. And before that, I was rather under the impression boys had cooties.

But it was foolish of me to think that we were anything more than friends. I mean, this is Sirius Black we're talking about. Sirius "Mr. Snog-Anything-With-A-Pulse" Black. He literally had a fan club around him everywhere he went. And I don't even know if he's a virgin anymore.

No. No more thinking about Black. This year will be different. This is my sixth year, my year to get everything fun out before having to be a stressed, annoying seventh year like my brother Jake.

"Marlene!" my mother yelled from downstairs, rousing me from my inner monologue.

"What?" I yelled back down the stairs.

"Hurry up dear, come down and eat so we won't be late for the train!"

I smiled. Finally, I was going back to Hogwarts. Not that I didn't completely love my family, but I missed my friends and was actually beginning to miss homework. I shuddered at the thought.

I clumsily pulled my trunk down the stairs and into the front hall. I walked into the sun-filled kitchen to see my dad and brother, sitting around our light-wooden table in the dining room. My brother was eagerly wolfing down his breakfast, as was my dad. I smiled. As much as I said I hated my brother, I knew he had my back and I had his, and I loved him.

"Well good to see you're finally up." said Jake disapprovingly, reading today's issue of the Dailey Prophet.

"I have been up, I was just thinking-" I started but Jake cut me off.

"About whom?"

"Nobody. Just things." I said, annoyed. I was in no mood for his "loving" teasing this morning.

"I wasn't sure you were capable of pondering actual intellectual things, so I just assumed." Jake said, returning to reading. Jake was a Ravenclaw and always took the opportunity to bring it up. But I was proud to be a lion.

"Oh like you're so much above me. Why don't you go back to day dreaming about your friend Kailey Pottsworth and we'll just be done with this little spat." I fired back. Jake's ears turned bright red and he hid his face in the newspaper.

"I don't know what you're talking about." he said quietly. I win.

"Are ya done bickerin' or do we have the pleasure of spendin' the entire mornin' hearin' this?" my dad asked.

"No." me and Jake both muttered.

"Good. Now Marley, come get somethin' in your belly."

After eating, we got to Kings Cross and went through the wall to platform 9 3/4 like every year. Then finally my mother and father thought they gave a sufficient goodbye and walked away. Then Jake ditched me for his seventh year friends.

Tosser.

"MARLENE MAUDE MCKINNON!" a voice yells from inside the train. I cringed at the usage of "Maude". Every since I was a child, I'd insisted on being only called "Marlene McKinnon", and Lily loved to use this to her advantage. Of course, she was Lily Evans, sans horrible middle name.

"Ugh Lily, you know I hate my middle name." I laugh as I tried to see where she is. I looked into a few compartments and around, but she was no where to be seen.

"In here you idiot!" She says, sticking her hair out from the compartment six from the end of the train merrily. She's always so happy to go back to Hogwarts, as I am. But I suppose she's always happy on September 1st, happy to get away from her wretched sister Petunia.

I throw my arms around her neck and pull her in for a bear hug. Lily Evans has been my best friend ever since we were nervous little first years and she found me wandering the hallway on the train and invited me to sit her compartment with Snape.

Snape. To be honest, I never really liked him. But I didn't dare tell Lily that. Even though they were not close any more due to the fact he's an ignorant Slytherin prat, I knew saying anything would cause some sort of reaction. Well, until last year after the OWLs with the "mudblood" incident. Personally, I never really cared about blood or heritage, and I didn't really think it mattered. Well, until I'd had the pleasure of meeting some of the Slytherins second year, who called me a "filthy half-blood".

I plop down next to her inside the compartment.

"I have to get to the prefect's compartment soon, but I just thought I'd say hi to my best friend whom I haven't talked to all summer." Lily said. She wore a green little sundress, which made me smile. I had missed her girly dresses, all summer I'd hung out with Jake and practiced Quidditch, and had missed her "feminine-ness" as Mary referred to it as.

"Really? You're going to leave and ditch your supposed best friend for a bunch of stuck-up pricks?" I said, pretending to be hurt.

"Oh shut up." She says laughing. "Unlike you, who is too cool to be a prefect, I enjoy the responsibilities and rewards that come with having the title. For example… I could… well I could snog anyone I want after hours because of that!"

"Oh yeah, like you would go snogging some random boy in the corridors late at night. Naughty Lily!" I said, jabbing her side.

"I could if I wanted!" she said back.

"Lily." I said. "You're even more of a prude then I am, so just shut it."

At that moment, I am greeted by the compartment door slamming open and coming face to face with James Potter. Behind him, I see Sirius and Remus.

"Hello Jelly!" says Potter, laughing and hugging me.

"James. Do. Not. Call. Me. Jelly!" I said, gritting my teeth. During 2nd year the first true conversation we had was about how much I loved grape jelly. I was too nervous around boys to be able to strike up a normal conversation between us, so I therefore embarrassed myself by describing the scientific compound of grape jelly. And ever since, James had called me Jelly.

"Whatever Jelly." He said, and turns to Lily. "Hello Lilypad!" He said merrily.

"Hello Potter." says Lily, not glancing up from her magazine she started to read the moment they walked in. I wish Lily wasn't so mean to James. Through all of the flirting, I can tell that he really likes her, and although he acts like it doesn't, I know it hurts him when she's so cold.

"We should be getting to the prefect's compartment." Lily says pointedly only to Remus, even though James is a prefect as well. With that, they all leave and I'm left alone with the world's most sexiest pair of eyes.

"Hey Marley." Sirius said, finally sitting down across from me. "Have a good summer?" For some reason, he seems a bit melancholy and surprisingly polite, which Sirius never is. This saddened me a bit, I wish there wasn't so much awkward air between us.

"Good enough, I guess. Though I missed Hogwarts." I said, failing at my plan to sound cool. He laughs in this short, clipped way. Fake, almost. "And yours?"

"Oh… um, great." He said, and changed the subject. "Excited for Quidditch this year?"

"Of course!" I said. I'm a chaser with James and a girl from 5th year named Amelia, and Sirius is a beater. "One of the things I really miss over the summer is Quidditch. My brother isn't on the team, but he practices with me at home. My dad never played it, and of course my mum is just confused about everything magical, but pretends not to be." I stop myself because I realize I'm talking too much, which is odd because sometimes I have no idea what to say to Sirius. My mind just goes blank occasionally when I'm around him.

We talked about trivial things for a while, Quidditch and classes and such. Eventually we fell into a comfortable silence, I reading my book and Sirius falling asleep. Casually, I looked to see if anyone was around. They weren't, so I closed my book and went to examine him.

I had never been actually this close to him before, and I'll admit it was rather unnerving. His black hair fell across his face, and I realized he had no dandruff or annoying grease. I wish I could say the same, I was plagued with the gift of dandruff from my dad, but luckily I learned a spell second year to cure it. His skin looked rough, but in a good way and his lips were soft and pink, begging to be kissed. I had to hold myself back from just kissing them right then and there, just to feel what they felt like.

The train suddenly stopped in front of the station and I scrambled to pick up my book and look like I was reading. I hoped I wasn't too red or that Sirius didn't notice.

He groggily opened his eyes and smiled. Oh god, he was so cute when he was away from other girls. When he was in the presence of his ridiculous fan club of fifth and fourth year girls, he was Sirius Black, resident bad-ass of Hogwarts. But right here, as he sat up from his reclined spot against the window and wiped the sleep out of his eyes… he looked beautifully normal.

"Sirius!" an annoying voice called. It was slaggy Hufflepuff Shannon Alister. Shannon and I were acquaintances back in first year, but then she randomly decided to spread a rumor around the school that I had back hair, and we haven't spoken since.

"Oh hello Shannon." He said, a little too flirtatious than I would have cared for. I glared at her as she pointedly ignored me.

"So me and the girls are having this party soon, only the coolest-" she sneered at me. "people are going. It's going to be smashing really, it's going to be a water themed party and everyone should wear their bathing suits, and we're thinking of getting some of the seventh years to conjure us up a swimming pool or something!"

Well, of course Sirius would go. A bunch of girls in bikinis? It would totally be his scene.

"I'll see." He said rather coolly. I tried to contain my laughter in watching Shannon's face attempt to hide the disappointment in the rejection of Sirius black, but unfortunately a snort came out.

But she just glared at me and stalked off.

"Hey, Marlene, there you are!" My other best friend Mary called to me. She stuck her head into the compartment, black hair flowing in front of her face. She quickly brushed it away and asked, "Aren't you going to get out?

"Hey. Uh, yeah." I said reluctantly, sensing that my time talking to Sirius was over for now.

He stood up, and muttered, "See you McKinnon." He smiled at Mary, and then left the compartment.

After he left, Mary turned to me and waggled her eyebrows.

"Oh shut it." I said, and jumped to hug her.

"Come on, let's get inside the castle before all the carriages leave you nutter." she said, laughing as she pulled away from the hug.

By The Fire

(Sirius Black)

Hungrily, I dug into the feast in front of me.

"Finally! I'm starving!" said Wormtail, sitting across from me. Of course he would be the one to voice his opinions about food.

I looked around the Great Hall. As much as I hated to admit it, I loved Hogwarts. It was my home.

Prongs was staring longingly at Evans who chatted to McKinnon and the other Gryffindor girls. Jesus, I needed to get him some ass, he was getting soft. Moony was reading that Muggle book about King Arthur quietly, and Wormtail was practically swallowing his dinner whole.

The Slytherins were being their usually prat selves, but I wasn't surprised. Slytherin girl Reina Doyle did wink at me, so I guess they can't all be horrible. But it's not like I would ever do that, she's practically a troll.

Dinner was boring, quite honestly, and after that all anyone wanted to do was sleep. I was disappointed in them. Though I let up, just simply thinking that we all needed our rest in preparation for all the pranks I was intending to pull this year.

Eventually, Prongs, Wormtail, and Moony left me and the common room was empty. I plopped down on the leather couch in front of the fire. I don't know how long I sat there, just staring into the flames, but I was derailed from my blank stare by none other then McKinnon, wandering down into the common room.

"Hello?" I asked, amused.

"Sha' up Jake-" she mumbled. "I jus' wanted some juuuice!" I was confused by this, but then I remembered her and Lily conjuring up some Muggle thing called a refrigerator, and getting some things from the house elves for a stash.

"Um I'm not Jake…" I laughed. Her eyes suddenly shot open.

"What? Wait… wh –" she said worriedly. Her eyes flicked around the room before landing on me. "Oh. Uh, hi."

"So why are you wandering down into the common rooms at night, well after bedtime? Not doing something naughty, are we McKinnon?" I teased, stretching my arms and putting them out across the couch top.

"Oh wouldn't you like to know." she said, smiling flirtatiously back at me.

"So aren't you going to get some?" Her face heated up. "Juice, I mean." I said innocently.

She let out a relieved sigh. "Yes, as I matter of fact I am."

"Do you always have this problem?"

"What are you talking about?" She asked, padding over to the fridge.

"Sleepwalking around the castle at night, frightening the tiny first years?" She just grinned at me and bent down.

Merlin, McKinnon had a better arse than I thought. Damn. She stood back up and walked over to the couch, carton of juice in hand.

She tipped her head back and brought her lips to the spout.

"How unladylike of you." I said. She snorted and put down the juice.

"You know me." A long pause went by before she said, "Well, what's up?"

"Nothing! Can't I just want to talk to you?" I asked, mockingly offended.

"Well… no, I suppose not. What would you like to talk about?" She asked, bringing her legs up onto the couch and crossed them. She wore a gray t-shirt and navy athletic shorts, hair sloppily up in what looked like a bun.

"Everything. Nothing. I don't really care." I said, turning back to the fire.

"How very poetic of you." She said, grinning. "When did Sirius Black become such a pansy?"

"Hey! Excuse me for wanting to talk to you!" She threw her head back in laughter, and it was then I realized how late it was.

"Are you always this loud?" She nodded vigorously. "Must be a terror to live with you."

"Ask my brother." She said. "On second thought, don't."

I laughed easily. It was nice, being like this with her. She always confused me. I thought we were friends, but then we wouldn't speak for a while. Then, the next time we did, it was slightly awkward.

But, she was one of the few people I could actually talk to.

I turned to leaning back on the couch. For a while, Marlene and I just sat comfortably in silence. Her slight breathing was a nice change from James' snoring.

I felt my eyes droop.

I woke up the next morning to the sound of Moony's laughter.

"Oi, Padfoot! Had an interesting night?" Prongs said, also laughing.

I looked down to see McKinnon, passed out on my chest. Her blond hair fanned out over me, and her body was curled up facing mine. My heart took off like a rabbit. How could she look so pretty waking up? No. McKinnon was not pretty. Sure she had really soft hair and nice eyes… but she wasn't the kind of pretty that GIRLS are. I watched her wake and quickly get up and run to the girl's dormitories. Her face was red as a beet.

"Padfoot, what the hell was that? Did you shag McKinnon last night?" Prongs asked, a giant grin on his face.

"We were just talking and she fell asleep on me. That was it." I said, sitting up. I was still reeling about the reaction my body had had when I saw McKinnon's angelic face…

What? Angelic? Who uses that word? Mooney?

"Sure. A hot girl falls asleep in your arms and all you do is sleep. Right Padfoot." Moony says, laughing. He crossed his arms and looked at me disapprovingly.

McKinnon? Hot? No way. She was just… McKinnon! Awkward, Quidditch-Obsessed McKinnon! She was not hot. Not hot at all.

Then why was your heart beating so fast when you woke up next to her? A little voice inside my head said. I quickly pushed it out and denied it.

Marlene McKinnon was not hot.

Cream Cheese

(Marlene McKinnon)

As Lily and I hurried to get to Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws, I began to think about the little incident that happened this morning.

How could I have fallen asleep on Sirius' chest last night? I knew from the train ride he looked gorgeous as he slept…

But I was the exact opposite! Knowing me I probably disgustingly drooled all over him.

Oh Merlin. Why am I even worrying about this? I said I was over Black. I said I was going to stay away from him.

I didn't even last a day!

"Marlene, are you ok?" Lily asked. I bet she looked perfect waking up.

See, Lily was the kind of flawless girl who would look good waking up. I mean, not flawless, but you know those girls in school that are beautiful in this really natural way? And they can be angry and riled up and still stunning? Yeah. That's Lily.

But see, unlike other girls, Lily was too kind to be hated for it. She was one of my best mates.

She definitely wouldn't have drooled though.

"Yes, fine. Just thinking, I guess." I replied, smiling. I adjusted the bag on my shoulder, and started to continue my way down the corridor.

"About Black?"

"What?" I practically yelled, whipping around to face my best friend. She grinned.

"Sorry, you just seemed so embarrassed when you came into our room last night and then I walk downstairs and I hear a story from Potter about you falling asleep on Black's lap! So I had to ask." She said. Merlin, she could see right through me.

"Fine. Yes, I have a crush on Sirius Black. But it's a tiny crush, and it'll probably be stamped out soon." I hissed, walking swifter down the hallway. But I knew that wasn't true. That's what I'd thought almost two years ago, and since then it's only swelled.

We rounded the corner and into the classroom. Most of the Ravenclaws were already there, so we had to take a seat near the back to Lily's dismay.

It wasn't long until the Marauders ran in with less then 30 seconds to spare. Professor McGonagall looked at them disapprovingly before Sirius and James sauntered to a table in front of ours, and Moony and Peter took the one far to the left.

Class started. James and Sirius wrote notes to each other and laughed the entire time like usual, and I longed to know what those notes said… also like usual.

Merlin, what I would give if a note just accidentally fluttered onto my desk…

I really needed to get over him. I mean… I was bordering on obsessive. I'm Marlene McKinnon for fucks sake! I am not some silly little schoolgirl who obsesses about some dumb boy.

I watched as Lily scribbled down notes and McGonagall turned a large wooden box into a giraffe. Class ended uneventfully and I gathered up my books and went back to the common room.

Then I went to Herbology and attempted to harvest plants with Lily, but ended up with her just yelling at me to sit down and let her get them.

I sat on a stool next to the long table and buried my face in my hands. What was wrong with me? Sirius obviously only saw me as another girl, in a parade of girls. I couldn't be that, it would kill me more than not being with him at all.

"Marls!" Lily practically shouted at me at dinner that night.

"What?" I asked, roused from my inspection of my pudding.

"Black keeps looking back here." Lily said smugly smiling at me. "Are you sure nothing happened last night?"

"Nothing happened!" I protested. "And he's not looking back here."

But she was right. The rest of the dinner I had my eye on him and he kept looking at me. In this way that I've never seen.

Back in bed that night I considered those looks. I mean, they couldn't have meant anything… could they? And even if they weren't random glances, he was probably just considering whether I was worth a snog this year or not. Sirius Black was not capable of thinking of girls in any other way.

Sadly, I lay down in my bed and attempted to go to sleep.

Unfortunately, a certain pair of grey eyes kept flashing through my head every time I thought I had achieved some peace.

I wondered if Sirius was down in the common room again. I had an internal fight with myself about whether or not to go downstairs. I mean, its was really awkward waking up next to him this morning, and he probably was disgusted by me and thought I was trying to act clingy or something. Trying to trap him, or something. I wouldn't put it past some of the other girls…

But the other half of my mind was longing to see him. So I acted on impulse.

He wasn't there. Just an empty common room with squishy couches, tables, windows, Lily's refrigerator and a dying fire.

It was now the second week of school and besides quick glances in the hallways, I had not seen Sirius at all. I spent most of my time doing homework and hanging out with Lily, who was pining after a seventh year Hufflepuff who I forgot the name of. I'd missed our boy stalking.

But I finally saw him yesterday after Transfiguration. He had a black eye that almost looked like it was from getting hit with an antler, and scratches on his face. He was also limping. Of course his fan club was doting on him everywhere with "Siri, are you ok?" "Oh you poor dear!" "You're so brave".

He glanced over the other girls' heads at me, but only for a moment, before returning his attention to Natalie who insisted she knew how to 'make it better'.

I decided to sit in between Remus and him at breakfast today, much to Lily's protests. She was forced to sit next to James, which he was quite pleased about.

"Marlene!" Remus said amicably.

"Hi Remus." I said, hugging him from behind as I sat down.

"Hi Sirius." I said, turning to him. He still looked a bit nattered, but he was acting his old self, taking the mickey out of Lily for sitting next to James.

"Oh hey McKinnon." He said distractedly.

"What's with the black eye?" I said cautiously.

"Um… guess the birds at this school are getting to me!" He said fakely.

"Uh, ok." I said, sensing that he didn't really want to talk about it. What could have happened? His eye up close was definitely hurt and there were a total of 6 different scratches on his face. I noticed that James too had a few scratches, and Remus looked like hell.

"So what's up?" Sirius said, turning to me.

"Nothing. We've got double potions today though, so I expect not to be too pleasant for long." I said, biting into my bagel.

"Bullocks. I'd almost forgotten about that. I still don't know how I got into advanced potions." He said.

"Oh well-" I began to say before Sirius interrupted.

"You've got a little cream cheese on your face." He stated before putting his thumb inches from my lips. My breath hitched in my throat as he caressed the skin the cream cheese had been on.

HOLY. SHIT. Sirius Black is touching my face. Next to my lips…

He looked into my eyes for a second and then moved his thumb away and continued eating breakfast like he hadn't just sexily touched my face.

I took a breath and tried to regain my composure, and cool my burning face. Luckily, nobody but Remus saw this happen and tried to make the situation less awkward.

"So when's Quidditch tryouts?" Oh smooth Remus. Everyone knows you don't care about Quidditch.

"I'll check with Fabian, but I think they're soon. I'm sure we'll be on the team again but still we ought to practice some more, don't you think Padfoot?" James blabbered on.

Fabian was a seventh year, captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, and resident heartthrob of Hogwarts. Him and his twin brother, I mean. They're both quite attractive gingers, and I think Mary was completely in love with him in fifth year. But then he got a girlfriend, and she stopped coming to watch Quidditch practice.

"Err, yes." said Sirius, uncharacteristically quiet. Why was he being so quiet? Had he been disgusted with touching my face? Was there something else on it besides cream cheese?

I had to get out of there before I blurted out anything awkward.

"Uh, Lily, I, er, I mean… we need to… come with me now." I said, standing up and walking out swiftly, with her following a few paces behind.

"What the hell Marlene?" Lily said, thrusting her books into her bag as we walked up the stairs. "I mean, thanks for saving me from Potter, but what made you run out?"

"Nothing. I just… I just want to get to class early." I lie as we walk up the steps. Lily knew it was a lie but I'm grateful that she didn't bring it up.

10 Days Until The Full Moon

(Sirius Black)

I was bored to tears. I mean, honestly, History of Magic is almost designed for day dreaming and thinking up pranks. Like… blowing up the third floor broom closet just to piss of Filch!

No, I used that closet to often for my... meet-ups. It would end up being a bother.

How about turning Dorcas' hair green? Or making Snivellus fall in love with his reflection? Or at least teasing some firsties!

But those were all just idle ideas. It felt like I had already done all of those.

My mind drifted back to McKinnon. How she'd gotten nervous when I touched her face… how soft her cheek was… how soft her LIPS were…

Get a grip Black! I told myself. You'd decided before. You could not snog Marlene. I mean, McKinnon! Prongs would never forgive you for pissing off Evans' best mate. It would ruin the Gryffindor friendships, because she would want a relationship like most girls did, and you wouldn't.

Right?

"…Black?"

"What?" I said, waking from my reverie. Mary MacDonald was staring at me expectedly. "Sorry, I wasn't really listening." I said, shooting her one of my signature grins.

"Well, ok slacker." she said, unphased. I was a little hurt.

"Slacker?" I said. "I've got just as much work as you do, and I get it together on time just like you do!"

"I suppose that is true." she said, seeming to wave the discussion away. "So. Let me fill you in. You and I are supposed to do research on our family trees, for as far back as we can get information for, and even the muggle borns have to do it. Personally, I think it's just going to lead to a whole lot of rubbish from the Slytherins about blood traitors and family pride, but nonetheless…"

"When's it due?" I asked.

"Two weeks." She said absentmindedly, digging for something in her bag. When you really took the time to study her, Mary MacDonald was quite pretty. She's got the same shade black hair as mine, and a nice face. Her eyes reminded me too much of my father though, which made me almost shiver.

"You and I are supposed to help each other with research and things, I suppose. It's not like we'll have any similarities, so I can't see why he would have us have partners…"

"10 days until the full moon." Prongs said, laying on his bed after dinner and playing with that bloody snitch again.

"Don't remind me." Moony said. He too was lying on his bed, looking up at the ceiling. I felt bad for him, really. I knew how hard the full moon was on him, and it took quite a lot of arguing each time to make him settle on the fact that we were coming with him.

"I quite like it!" Wormtail piped up from his place on the floor, surrounded by food. Like usual.

"That's because you don't have to become a complete beast and endure a horrible transformation." Moony snapped. He exhaled. "Sorry Wormtail, I'm a bit tense lately. I'm taking an extra class this year, and I guess it's been getting to me."

"Oh, It's OK Moony." said Wormtail, feigning cheer.

"Whatcha' got there Wormy?" I said, bounding off the chair I was sitting in to the floor.

"Mine!" He yelled, grabbing all the food he could and attempting to run from me.

"Nevermind him." said Prongs. "Padfoot, we've got to start focusing on Quidditch. We've got to-"

"Prongs." I stopped him. "All you talk about now is Quidditch and Evans. When are we going to get back at Filch?"

"What's there to get back for?" Moony asked.

"Existing." Prongs and I said together.

"You know… Halloween is coming up!" said Prongs happily. We both grinned. I remember when we were younger at Hogwarts, we were the only kids that did some muggle thing called "trick and treating" or something that Moony told us about. Now Halloween consisted of girls in slutty costumes hit on us and drinking a shitload of firewhisky. And the party of course!

"Yes, one of the many nights a year where you and Padfoot get pissed drunk and grope fifth years." Moony said sarcastically.

"No, no no my dear Moony!" I said, flopping onto his bed next to him. "Halloween is not just another night. It's a night of costumes, random hookups without much consequence, and enough darkness to do just about anything. Plus you can't beat the chocolate! Come on Moony, everyone knows you have a thing about chocolate."

"I suppose that's the one upside…" he said sarcastically.

"Prongs, we've got to get Moony some ass." I said, getting up and sauntering over to where I was previously sitting.

"Oh definitely."

"Not that I don't appreciate the thought…" said Moony.

"Come on Moony, you really do need to go get some. Think about it… a hot girl to snog for one night, no strings." Prongs pushed.

"What about Lily? Aren't you completely loved up with her?" Moony asked.

"Well… I've been after her forever, and it's obvious she doesn't return the thought. It's about time to get over her." He said, not really meaning to convince us, but more himself.

"Whatever you say mate." I said.

I saw McKinnon exactly 4 times this entire week.

Oh Merlin, how do I know that? Usually I can't even remember how many times I've snogged certain girls.

Whatever. McKinnons hot. She's like…forbidden fruit or something. I know I can't have it so I want it more. That's all it is.

Hopefully.

Last night I'd been snogging Anna Daley from Ravenclaw, and McKinnon's face couldn't get out of my mind. I couldn't stand this.

I didn't even know her well! Just friendly conversations and a shared love of Quidditch! I just needed to find someone else to focus on.

"Hey! Black! Can you come back to earth please?" I heard Mary say.

"Oh, what? Sorry." I said uncommittedly. I couldn't stand hearing more and more about the different designs we should use for our family trees in History of Magic. Honestly, I'd done no research, and I wasn't looking forward to it.

See, my family and I don't see eye-to-eye. To put it more simply, my mother is a heartless bitch, my father is a cold, black-hearted (no pun intended) man, and my brother a wimp. And don't even get me started on my cousin Bella.

"Don't worry." Mary said, seeming to hear my thoughts. "I haven't done much research either. How about we meet in the library at… right after dinner tomorrow? Sorry if that spoils your evening conquest." she joked.

"Yeah. I did have a threesome set up, but no matter." Her eyes bulged at that. "I'm kidding." I added, her not seeming to get my joke.

She laughed. "Yeah. If it had been anyone else I would have known… but with you I'm never quite sure."

"It's OK MacDonald, I know you're just jealous." I sniffed.

"Jealous? Maybe you are jealous of me!" she said. "At least I'm not infected with diseases from the whores that agree to snog you!"

"Language please Miss MacDonald. Aren't you two supposed to be choosing a design for your trees?" Professor Bins asked. Mary's face flushed red.

"Yes sir. Sorry." She said and glared at me.

"Yes Miss MacDonald, I didn't think a saint like you could have ever uttered those words!" I added.

"I was surprised with you too." She fired back. "I thought you could use that mouth and tongue that I've heard so much about could actually be put to use for an intelligent conversation, but I guess I was incorrect."

"Well… you're a buttface!" I said back.

"Mature." She said before getting up with the rest of the class and exiting the room.

I'll admit… it wasn't my best comeback.

"What was all that about?" asked Moony, waiting for me after class.

"Just regular MacDonald."

He laughed. "I swear, you two fight just like sisters."

I glared back at him. He grinned.

Prick.

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