Let it Be Me – Chapter 1

By MyNameIsCAL

So I believe it was flYegurl who suggested I write an Iggel fanfic, and here it is. It doesn't really take place after a book, it's really just, well, in its own little alternate reality. Of course, so things won't be so weird, they're all adults now. This isn't meant to be creepy at all. This is gonna be interesting, and I haven't got a clue what I'm doing really. Anyway, enjoy!

-Iggy's POV-

15 years later and here I was, alone. Well, at least I felt alone. I can't say living with Max and Fang really seemed like being alone. They had been good to me though, and I did appreciate it. But relationships always seemed to fall into place pretty fast as we got older. None of us had really been motivated to go to school or anything, so we filled our time with each other, especially after the crazy scientists and all those evil creeps were stopped from trying to kill us.

I knew that it was inevitable that Max and Fang would be together. Max was only a couple months older than me and she would always be my sister. I could never think of her anymore, but when she and Fang got married, it was hard not to feel disappointed, or maybe a little jealous about it. They've been married for about ten years now and had a son.

Nudge and Gazzy would be getting married in a couple of weeks. I was Gazzy's best friend and he was supposed to be mine, but I knew I couldn't handle living with him and Nudge after they got married. It hurt too much. For a while, I thought it should have been Nudge and me together, but you know, who wants to be married to a blind guy? Gazzy seemed hurt by me moving out, but I knew eventually he'd get over it. Although being sightless, I knew I couldn't live alone. Max probably wouldn't have let me anyway, as much as I wished I could get my own place. With the promise that I would cook for them every now and then, Fang and Max allowed me to move into their house.

As for Angel, well, I haven't seen her for a while. She went off on her own after convincing Max she would be okay. We received a postcard from her every now and then. The last time we heard from her, she was in Canada. Nudge and Gazzy's upcoming wedding would probably be the first time any of us had seen her in at least a year.

Like most mornings since I've moved in, I was the first one awake. I bumped into a few piece of furniture before finding my way to the kitchen. Their house was simple to figure out, I just felt like I had been losing focus lately.

"Are you hungry?" I asked Fang before he could even come in.

He gave me a half mumbled answer. "No, it's alright, I'll just warm something up from the fridge."

"You know, I really don't mind cooking," I told him.

He paused for a moment, changing the subject suddenly. It was typical of Fang. He wasn't really the kind of guy to hold a very long conversation, well, unless he was talking to Max or Oz, his son. "Max is going out today with Nudge to help with wedding arrangements. She said I should take you out somewhere."

I shook my head. "Nah, it's alright."

"C'mon, Ig, I know you don't like being cooped up at home." That might have just been the longest thing Fang has said to me since I got here.

That afternoon, I found myself in the car with Fang. Max drove a minivan, but Fang had a black sports car, one that got a lot of attention whenever he drove it. I always thought it didn't suit his personality, but either way, Fang put a lot of time into maintaining it even though he only drove it every now and then.

"So where are we going?" I asked, sliding my fingers across the dashboard.

"Angel is coming tomorrow," he told me. "Called last night actually."

"So we need food," I said.

"Well, yeah." Fang and his vague answers. I wondered how Max put up with him.

"Am I cooking? Or are you and Max going to try and not burn the house down?"

"You've seemed distracted lately." Fang started the car, moving to another topic of discussion. "Gazzy thinks that he marrying Nudge upsets you."

I let out a sigh. "It doesn't upset me."

"But it bothers you."

It bothered me because I finally realized I was going to be alone for the rest of my life, that I would always be dependent on the people that had everything that I couldn't have. Even if they could understand how I felt, I got the feeling that it wouldn't matter much.

"It doesn't bother me," I lied.

The rest of the car ride was silent, only the roar of the engine to keep me from my thoughts.

I wanted to drown myself in alcohol, but the last thing I needed to do was show everyone how unstable I really was. Sitting in the corner of the room, I listened to the band play as people moved across the dance floor together. There were too many people here. It was overwhelming trying to listen to everything. I finally escaped to the outside, the building I left behind seemed to be pulsing with life, unlike out here which was dark and cold.

"Iggy," I heard someone say my name. "Hey, there you are."

"Hey, Angel," I managed to answer. She sounded different now. I remembered when she was still six years old, tired of running, but still energetic.

Are you okay? She entered my head and I closed my eyes, still seeing darkness.

"Can't you find the answer yourself?" I asked, slouching onto the bench.

She took a seat next to me. "I know how you feel, Iggy."

I didn't say anything in response.

"You don't have to be miserable for the rest of your life," she said after a while.

"I've been miserable for the past fifteen years, Ange, do you really think things are gonna get better?" I let out a laugh. "I shouldn't complain though, I could be dead."

"I don't like being alone either." Angel let out a breath. "I thought leaving you all would make things easier on me. Traveling the world has been fun, but I just can't stand people. Believe it or not, but your thoughts and the rest of the flock's thoughts are easier to listen to. I guess because I'm used to it. I thought I'd find someone, but every time I start talking to a guy, I just can't stand their thoughts."

"What's your point?" I wanted to be left alone.

She read my thoughts. "That maybe, at least, the two of us could be miserable together instead of alone."

There was a moment of silence. Angel wasn't a little kid anymore, but even now I think all of us still saw her that way even though she wasn't. She had grown up and matured.

"It's cold out here," I muttered. "Let's go back inside."

I felt her take my hand, leading me through the crowd. We took a seat somewhere and we held a conversation through our thoughts for a while. I found myself opening up to Angel, telling her about all the things I had kept to myself over the years.

"You know, we should at least dance once," Angel said out loud.

Again she took my hand. I rested an arm around her waist, my other hand still in hers. We went around in awkward circles and I had to laugh after a while. To even think that I was blind and trying to dance seemed like a joke, but when the song ended, I found myself letting go of Angel slowly. It was late now, all of this almost over, but the time with Angel had seemed almost enjoyable.

After saying goodbye to Gazzy and Nudge, Angel and I took Oz back to the house for Fang and Max. Already asleep, we tucked him into bed and made our way back to the hallway. Angel's room was across from mine and we stopped between our doors, her hand finding mine again.

"Thanks for tonight," she said softly.

Before I could even respond, she leaned forward and kissed me.

Thanks for reading!