Why am I doing this? I don't know. I just felt like writing RPF. 8D

Joey and Darren sat on a couch, determinedly hitting the 'F5' buttons on their separate laptops, while Lauren lounged casually next to them in a stark contrast, surfing through the channels.

"Chill, guys! It's only 7pm here. It's, what, 2am in the morning over there?" Lauren laughed.

Darren and Joey did not 'chill'. In fact, they felt like explaining to Lauren once more the absolute importance of what they were doing, but neither was willing to take the risk of missing the quill when it came out. Then, they spent about 2.6 nanoseconds wondering how Lauren knew that they were gathering this late because the quill came out in London time, and then spent 0.4 seconds reprimanding themselves for wasting a full 3 nanoseconds thinking about irrelevant things, and then hit 'F5' once more.

"Seriously though," Lauren continued in the same casual tone, "the quill's not coming out until at least 8am London time."

Joey was the first to take the bait. "Rumours, Lauren, rumours! Would you take the risk of missing the quill and listen to those rumours?"

Lauren muttered a hidden 'yes', but rolled her eyes and turned her laptop screen around to face them. "Work smart, not word hard, boys."

"The- the Pottermore Insider?" Darren stuttered. "Inside news from the Pottermore dudes?"

Joey dropped to his knees to worship the words that the Pottermore Gods had apparently brought to them.

Before Darren could join Joey as well, Lauren rolled her eyes once more and dragged Joey up, shoving the laptop in front of him and ordering, "Read. Now."

Sure enough, the Insider assured that the clue would not come out before London Time 8am, something that had been speculated on Harry Potter fansites for the past month.

Darren let out a sigh of relief and, for the first time that night, relaxed against the couch. Joey looked like his world was falling to pieces.

"But-but-IT'S A TEST. I KNOW IT. They're making sure only the most devoted will get in!" And he turned back to the laptop and pressed the abused 'F5' button yet again.

Lauren stared in slight disbelief, then remembered that this was Joey that they were dealing with, the guy who broke down when they went to Harry Potter theme park in Orlando for the first time. Granted, Darren broke down soon after, but Lauren was pretty sure it was because he kept getting distracted by everything and lost in the crowd.

Darren just shrugged and reached for the snacks. Lauren slapped his hand away, looking pointedly at the anxious Joey, who was getting visibly more and more distressed by the second as his refreshing pursuits bore no results.

"What am I supposed to do? I mean, I'm a major Potterhead as well, come on, I played Harry Freakin' Potter, but Joey is seriously obsessed," Darren pointed out.

Lauren scowled. "I don't know, do something! You're his best friend, you have bromance powers over him and if you don't do something, I bet you fifty bucks that he'll end up in the mental ward by the end of the day."

Darren just sighed, quietly thinking to himself that it was impossible to calm Joey down, and reached for more snacks, when something caught his eye, a flash of red and blue-

"Hey Joey. Joey. Hey, hey Joey," Darren said, and Lauren smirked at an obvious parody of what had been once her lines.

Joey reluctantly looked up, and Lauren was struck with the image of a wet, lost kitten.

"Wait, wait, don't go back, talk to me for a while, Joey."

"But- Pottermore- website- quill-"

"No. I promise nothing will happen," Darren assured Joey, who scooted over after a hesitant second.

"Question for you, Joey," Darren said, and Lauren saw a twinkle in his eye, and wondered what he was doing. "Favourite Aimee Mann song?"

There was a hint of a smile on Joey's face as he instinctively answered, "Redvines," and continued, "Favourite colour of vines other than green?"

"Redvines. Favourite way to say Redvines in a German accent?"

"REDVINES," They yelled in unison, and laughed, as Darren pulled out a Redvine and said, "So, do you want a delicious" –turn to an imaginary camera- "Redvine?"

"You bet I do!" Joey laughed and snatched the snack out of Darren's hand. As he munched on it, he contemplated, "You know, I hated this stuff before. But now it's actually pretty awesome. In fact, in AVPS, I switched out the Redvines for Twizzlers."

Darren already knew about this, but Lauren was horrified. "Never tell the fans that. They'd rebel. It'd change their whole world view."

Suddenly, Joey's face dropped again. "Pottermore-" he protested, but Darren simply said in reply, as if expecting this, "Why don't you get over here right now, and sit on my lap?"

Lauren had to struggle to stifle a giggle as Joey had the 'confused kitten' face again.

"Well, the world always looks a little bit brighter from the top of a lap," Darren announced grandly, and Lauren wished that she had videotaped it for Walker to see.

Joey reluctantly scooted over and sat on Darren's lap. As Darren reached over and passed him the Redvines, Joey seemed to visibly relax and Darren mimed letting out a sigh of relief to Lauren, who mimed an impressed applause back to him, while Joey munched happily on Redvines.

Darren had a twinkle in his eye again as he muttered to Lauren, "So, that 50 dollar bet you mentioned just now about Joey ending up in a mental ward by the end of the day – is it still on?"

Lauren simultaneously sighed, grinned and whacked his arm.

No, seriously, what did I just write?