A/N: I'm sick. So I spent the day writing. Does this surprise anyone? And these thirty word thingies are so much harder than I thought they were.

Disclaimer: I don't own ze x-men.

1. Poky

"Mom!" Charles rubbed his temples. "Alex won't friend me!"

"Sean, if you want to poke your brother that badly, you can walk down to the hall to his room. Facebook is not necessary."

"Then why are you and dad married there?"

2. Wittingly

Raven smirked and sipped her orange juice. Alex stared at the table, carefully not looking at either of their parents. Hank held the paper in front of his face. Sean hummed loudly and off key.

Charles, did you really have to project the fact that we were having sex last night into all of their minds?

It beats actually telling them, and now none of them will ever barge into our room uninvited.

3. Mitten

Erik glared at the fuzzy blue objects.

"I wear gloves Charles."

"But Raven spent a week knitting them for you!"

"…Fine."

4. Persecution

The cries of the other Jews. The roaring smell of the firepits. The way his mother screamed his name as they dragged her away. The ever present fear that this will happen again, that someday it will be Charles who is being dragged away from him, Charles being thrust into the hands of people who hate him for being different.

Then Erik looks at the green meadows and the enormous windows and the children laughing, and thanks God for how safe this haven of Charles's is.

5. Prospective

"So, um." The woman's eyes dart nervously from him to Charles. "You think Bobby could qualify to go to this school of yours?"

"Yes." Charles smiles benignly at her. Her son sits hunched between she and her husband, looking very nervous. "He's very talented."

Yeah, like they want a freak like me.

Quite the contrary, young man. The blonde mutant's eyes widened at the voice in his head. You and your abilities will fit right in at our school.

6. Unscrupulous

Erik, is this really the best method?

Erik grinned sharkishly and beckoned the next student forward. She looked up from her whispered conversation with Sean, eyes wide.

Don't be silly Charles. Terror is a phenomenal motivator.

7. Ulceration

"Sean, Alex, stop throwing that-" Charles gritted his teeth. "If you two do not cease and desist immediately, you're going to be grounded until you're forty!" He put a hand on her stomach. "I swear these two are giving me an ulcer…"

8. Moss

Charles was really grateful for the plant. He never would've consented to sneaking away from the picnic for a quickie with Erik if they were going to be having sex on a plain rock.

9. Medulla

Slowly, very, slowly, Charles was replacing Shaw as the heart of his struggle. And Charles was golden.

10. No-Brainer

"Charles Frances Xavier, will you marry me?"

11. Furlough

"Here." Charles pushes a white piece of paper forward over the desk, and smiles at the commander. "For Sean Xavier."

The officer reads the words that aren't actually there, and nods.

"Relieved from duty."

Sean doesn't ask when Charles brings him home, having avoided the draft.

12. Crappy

Erik stared at the toilet. Charles stared at the toilet. Hank coughed in embarrassment and looked anywhere but the toilet.

"Well Erik, considering you're the father figure, it's your job to unclog this."

13. Moisten

Erik tossed the oil from one hand to the other. Charles gulped audibly. Well, now he knew why his lover had been so adamant about none of the children coming on their holiday…

14. Yardarm

"I can't believe that in all your Nazi hunting, you never learned how to do this."

"Nobody uses sailboats anymore Charles!"

"I can tell. Now Erik, kindly untwist the yardarm and we can all do our best to turn the boat back over."

15. Fulmination

"You know Alex, I can tell you dye your hair." Hank said.

"…Oh no you didn't, bitch."

16. Often

Raven sighed and glanced at her watch. They did this every time…

"Erik, seriously! Stop ravishing my brother in the shower and get him down here, we've got training!"

17. Mesdames

Erik stared as Charles came down the steps with Raven on one arm, in blonde goddess form, and Angel on the other. Alex was drifting along at his shoulder, and Sean in a tux was walking just in front of him.

"The French Ambassador is going to think you're a pimp."

18. Presidential

It's not really so bad, Charles convinced himself, as he moves the President's hand to sign the bill allowing for mutants to live free. As the President's secretary hands him another paper, this one for a war, and Charles manipulates the leader of the country's words to reject it, he reminds himself that this is for the greater good.

19. Trundle

It was hard enough for Charles to get around in his wheelchair on these crowded streets, let alone with a child on his lap and all that she owned in the word with her.

As Ororo clings to him, he finds that the difficulty is worth it.

20. Baptize

As they stand around the tub of water, where a priest is dropping oil on the blue mutant's forehead, while Raven and Hank watch with pride, Charles squeezes Erik's hand.

Thank you for coming anyway, Erik.

21. Upper Crust

Erik stared. Charles was at the door in his tux, greeting one of the visitors to their dinner party.

Erik, I told you, my family is from the upper class.

I didn't think that meant the Queen of England would be attending.

22. Germinate

Sometimes Erik wonders how this happened. How he and Charles's tiny little idea of a school turned into the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngster's, sanctuary for all mutants, political power unto itself.

Then he wonders how Erik Lensherr, coldhearted Nazi Hunter, became Erik Xavier, unofficial father to half the students here, and remembers that everything is Charles's fault.

23. Pb

There were many things Erik had seen. But this…somehow he had overlooked this goodness. And Charles had seen in his mind that he had never come into contact with what was perhaps the greatest force in the universe, and thought it only right to introduce them.

"Charles." Erik breathed. "What is this?"

"Peanut butter."

24. Fauna

"I can't believe that Hank slipping up and calling the children that got those parents to agree."

"Scientists are all strange."

25. Bindery

"Seriously, you have a room in the manor devoted to making books?"

"Yes." Charles restrained a smile as Hank's eyes glazed over. "Sure you want to go work for the government again?"

26. Masturbation

Charles winced and rubbed his temples. He really, really, really, needed to have a talk with the teenage boys in the mansion about projecting their thoughts.

27. Instrument

Erik closed his eyes as the notes washed over him.

"You never said you could play piano like that."

"My mother taught me." Charles voice was soft and sad.

28. Spiky

Erik thought that was the stupidest mutation ever, and henceworth called the kid "porcupine" in his head. That night, he slept on the couch.

29. Suffocation

Sometimes, in the beginning, Erik couldn't breathe. No matter how big the mansion was, or how sprawling the grounds were, it was too small, too confining. He could stand on the roof and stare out over the waves, and feel like he couldn't move.

Strange then, how he could be lying on a couch in the tiny little place fondly called "the book nook" with Charles on top of him, and feeling free as the wind.

30. Guard

Charles knew they were coming. He always knew. As they waited at the front door for the helicopters to descend, Charles in his wheelchair and Erik standing with spare change littered around him, the metal bender smiled.

Let Stryker come for their children. They were ready.

A/N: Whoa, that was harder than I thought it'd be. It was also really, really, really, fun. Totally took my mind off the nausea. Review please?