These are purely for the sake of dumb jokes and bad parodies. Nia is my OC Orc from "An Eternal Bond". She is the only one mentioned here that I own. I do not own LOTR. (I wish I did, though.)

"Orc Love Story" sung by Nia to Shagrat

We were both young when I first saw you.

I close my eyes and the flashback starts,

I'm standin' there

By a river in the summer air.

I see the fire, see the dancing, the moon's out

I see you make your way through the crowd

And say hello.

Little did I know

That you were Aragorn, you were throwin' pebbles

And my father said "Stay away from my Arwen."

And I was cryin' in the doorway

Beggin' you "Please don't go."

And I said

Shagrat, take me

Somewhere we can be alone,

I'll be waiting

All that's left to do is run

You'll be the prince

And I'll be the princess

It's a love story

Shagrat, just say yes.

So I sneak out to the forest to see you.

We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew

So close your eyes

Escape this world for a little while

Oh, oh, 'cause you were Aragorn and I was the One Ring

And my father said "Stay away from my Arwen"

But you were everything to me

I was beggin' you "Please don't go."

And I said

Shagrat, take me

Somewhere we can be alone

I'll be waiting

All that's left to do is run

You'll be the prince

And I'll be the princess

It's a love story

Shagrat, just say yes

Shagrat, save me

They're tryin' to tell me how to feel

This love is difficult

But it's re-eal

Don't be afraid

We'll make it out of this mess

It's a love story

Shagrat, just say yes

Well I got tired of waiting

Wondering if you were ever comin' again

My faith in you was fadin'

When I met you outside Sauron's land

And I said

Shagrat, save me

I've been feelin' so alone

I keep waiting

For you, but you never come

Is this in my head

I don't know what to think

You knelt to the ground

And pulled out a ring

And said

Marry me, Nia

You'll never have to be alone

I love you

And that's all I really know

I talked to your father

Go pick out a long dress

It's a love story

Nia, just say

Yes.

Oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh

'Cause we were both young

When I first saw you