The Water

By Jokers

As the Leviathans waded into the water, Castiel watched. It was an unpleasant feeling, watching but not being in control, and the Angel of Thursday suddenly felt an immense sympathy for Jimmy Novak. The disintegrating body took an unnecessary breath and dove under the water, sending a cloud of ink shooting out of it as it dissolved. A trench coat floated towards the Winchesters.

Castiel opened his eyes, then realized he had no eyes to look with. Jimmy's body was gone, leaving him floating under the water in his true form. The angel attempted to teleport, but found he was too weak. And really, where would he have gone anyway? He had betrayed the Winchesters, he had fallen from heaven, and it was unlikely he would be able to quickly find another vessel. No, it was better just to stay under the water. Perhaps if he didn't move, it would eventually purify his sins. Or kill him. It didn't really matter.

His head was so foggy. For a moment he thought it might be a lingering effect of the leviathans, but then all he could think about was how much he hurt. He felt like his entire being was falling apart at the seams, and wished it would hurry up already.

The water was changing color. At first, he hadn't noticed the clear, sterile water of the reservoir giving way to the murk of a natural body of water. Then small fish began to flit across his field of vision, racing between pond plants, in a hurry to get nowhere. He wondered what had happened, but the thought slipped away before it even fully formed. Castiel's awareness flickered, and he welcomed the sensation. He slept.

A presence woke him, its light twirling around him, curling around his grace and pulling him forward. The small part of his mind that could still think registered it as a soul, a soul from a holy bloodline, and wondered at the power of coincidence. He reached the soul, mentally cocking his head to the side as he examined the human before him. It was wearing a bulky white suit and helmet, one that he had seen while watching a TV show when….he couldn't remember. He just remembered that the man wearing it had been able to jump very far and play a strange game involving a long metal stick and a small white ball.

This, however, was not a man, as Castiel discovered when he leaned in close. The figure in the suit was a woman, probably nearing fifty, with a mane of dark blonde curls and green eyes. She looked…the angel struggled to remember the word. Sad. That was it, she looked sad.

"Hello," he said. She didn't move. The angel remembered belatedly that his voice could burn her eardrums. He was silent. They stayed that way for a few moments, him staring at her. Her not acknowledging his presence. Then she blinked once, twice, three times, and opened her mouth.

"Who are you?"

"I don't remember." It was true. He remembered some things. The man in the white suit jumping, a black vehicle, a rough hand pulling him up. Himself pulling the man with the rough hand up, in the exact same way. And pain, so much pain, pain and blood and a viscous black liquid that seeped into his very core, "Who are you?"

"River."

"But," The angel paused, confused, "We are in a lake." The woman looked confused as well, but then that dissolved into amused understanding.

"No, silly, that's my name." The angel blinked.

"Oh."

"Why are you here?"

"I…I need a vessel. I don't know why, but…"

"Do you want to know why I'm here," Castiel made a noise of affirmation, and she continued, smiling slightly, "I'm here to kill a good man."

"Why?"

"It's what I was born to do. I can't resist the urge when I'm around him."

"You do not seem pleased by this."

"I'm not. This man, the Doctor, he is a very good man. He is a very good man and…I think…I think that I'm supposed to fall in love with him. In the future, I mean."

"But…if he's dead…"

"Ooh, sorry. Time travel. His past is my future, so our relationship is rather messy. I just…I wish this didn't have to happen." The angel contemplated for a moment before reaching into her mind. He found a blemish, a compulsion, and examined it. It was strong, to strong for a human to overcome, but an angel should be able to move around it.

"I can make it so you don't have to kill the Doctor."

"How?" River seemed eager, so much so it almost hurt the angel thinking of what killing the Doctor would have done to her.

"I need a vessel, and you apear to be of a suitable...bloodline. If I possess you, I should be strong enough to ignore the command"The words simply flowed, he had no foreknowledge of them, they just appeared in his mind and were voiced almost before he could process them.

The woman hesitated for only a moment before nodding. The angel puts his non-corporeal hands on her head, and feels himself flow into her, ever so slowly. It is a comforting feeling, one of becoming whole.

The angel blinks, and when he opens his eyes he is fully within River Song. The pieces within his mind begin to settle and, though he knows he is by no means healed, at least he could think again. And he has a name. It was echoing in his head, sometimes a whisper, or a silent encouragement, in many different voices. But one was louder, more frequent than the others: A man, his voice cracking with betrayal, pleading, sorrow. Cas. Cas. Cas. His name is Cas, or Castiel, but Cas feels much more…right…

Cas smiles, aware in the back of his mind that he does not often smile, and takes a deep breath. Focusing on the dim grace within himself, Castiel breaks the bonds holding him to the bottom of the lake, and feels himself begin to float toward the surface.

The Doctor was ready to die. He had known it was coming for quite some time and had finally, finally, made peace with it. He stood on the beach, knowing he was going to die, and his only regret was that his friends would see it as well. An impossible astronaut rose from the depths, causing Rory and Amy to look startled. River, however, was unsurprised. Of course she was, she had been here before.

The astronaut moved forward, and the Doctor took a deep breath to quell the sudden fear rising in his throat. This had to happen. Had to…

The astronaut stopped. The Doctor looked at her and smiled. "I know who you are." River. This was the last time he would see her, but one of the first times she would see him.

"I don't believe you do." The astronaut removed her helmet as she spoke and, though it was River's voice, it was not River speaking. This was something older, something sadder, than River Song. Even older and sadder than the River who he had first met, the one about to die.

"Who are you?" The Doctor asked, putting a hand on River's forehead and reaching toward her mentally. He had expected something odd: a shape shifter, or flesh, or perhaps a death-bot filled with miniature people. He hadn't expected what he got however. The mind of not-River was filled with scattered thoughts and memories, and it took a moment to sort through them. When he did he just stared at the person in front of him. Behind the shattered bits of the mind before him was a genuine angel of the Lord, or at least an angel of something which considered itself to be God.

"Scratch that question, I have a better one. Why are you here…and why are you River?"

The angel wearing River's face tilted its head to the side, looking genuinely distraught.

"I…am lost."

A/N: This fic was inspired by a combination of Tumblr and Facebook discussions. Obviously AU.