They were at a motel room a state over from Missouri, fast to get out of St. Louis after Dean had shot a shape shifter that looked exactly like him. It had shaken both of them up, and they were tired, dirty, and worn out. Sam and Dean were just getting back into the swing of things, in working together, but they couldn't get over how much the other had grown over their time apart. Dean couldn't stop looking at his brother; he'd grown up so much, now taller than him and smarter than ever. He looked so good. Sam was astounded at how handsome his big brother had gotten, even though he always knew Dean was going to be gorgeous. He was gorgeous when they were kids. But now, more prominent muscles everywhere and he had stubble on his perfect jaw. So many feelings had stirred in him when Dean broke into his apartment, fought him to the floor, and when he heard his voice for the first time in so many years... The feeling was indescribable.
Sam stripped off his jacket and breathed a sigh of relief when he heard the click of a lock. They were alone, and nothing bad could hurt them now. Dean walked up behind him, clapping a hand on his shoulder, "You okay?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine," He looked down at him, nodding, "What about you? Your face looks a little..." Perfect?
"Beat to Hell? Yeah, I know. But I'm fine. What about you? You got a few scrapes, Sammy." It felt good to call him that again, to hear it roll off his tongue and see his little brother respond.
Sam looked unbelieving at Dean's response, and he reached out, setting a hand against an already forming bruise on his brother's jaw, watching him flinch away from the pain. He rolled his eyes, "Yeah, no pain."
"Never said there wasn't any pain." Dean told him, grabbing his hand before he pressed down again. Sam felt a jolt of electricity when their hands met, and he couldn't help the shaky breath he let out. The older man suddenly stopped, and looked at their hands, then up at his brother. He looked unsure; blank, almost. Sam begrudgingly let his hand slip from the other's, and he felt the callouses, remembered when Dean would run his fingertips along his stomach and it would feel so good. He bit his lip, and actually had to take a step back. Dean did the same.
"So, um... I think the shifter cut my arm when he grabbed me, so I'm gonna go fix myself up." Dean backed up, heading toward the bathroom before he bumped into the wall next to the doorway, then he finally took his eyes off Sam. He closed the door most of the way, and shucked away his jacket, and dirty shirt.
The younger Winchester took off his boots and made his way over to one of the beds, sitting down with a sigh. He knew he didn't have any serious injuries, accept for maybe a slight concussion along with the cuts marring various parts of his body, and he knew Dean was okay for the most part, too. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands, gingerly with his right eye, then set his head in his hands and stayed like that, thinking of what to do next. He heard the clatter of what he thought would be a first aid kit, and then Dean hiss.
Sam didn't know why he stood up, or why he walked to the bathroom. But he pushed the door open slowly, and he saw bare skin; the sun kissed skin of his brother's torso, rippled with muscles. He looked so strong. He was tending to a deep cut on his bicep, most likely given to him by some sharp, dirty thing in that sewer, and Sam was damned if it didn't make Dean look sexier.
"Are you okay? Do you need something?" That brotherly, but deep, voice cut through his thoughts and made him look up, into those green eyes that always stayed the same to him.
"I just, uh... Let me help." He moved in closer, arm brushing Dean's uninjured one as he turned on the faucet and washed his hands.
The older man watched silently as Sam grabbed a towel and dried his hands off, then went around, small bathroom making it difficult for them to not be touching as he got to his cut arm. He felt the brush of denim covered hips to his favorite pair of Levi's covered ass, and he swallowed hard, forcing back a few thoughts he really didn't want to come up... or anything else, for that matter. He couldn't deny that he still wanted Sam like he wasn't supposed to, still loved him like he wasn't supposed to, but his brother was normal now. He did not want to mess that up now.
The younger man stood next to him, putting a hand around his brother's bicep so he could inspect the wound, not being able to help when he squeezed just a little to feel how much muscle was under the skin. Dean licked his lips as he looked at his brother's big hand, which went unnoticed by Sam. He cleaned the wound, getting the potential infection out, and with a little whining from his big brother, he had gauze bandaging around his arm in no time. They stood there awkwardly for a few seconds after, neither of them wanting to move, or look away from each other, but wishing the other would, to show their chances.
"Thanks, Sam." He said, giving a soft smile.
Sam just nodded, running a hand through his hair to get it out of his eyes, only to have it fall right back into place. He grimaced to himself. Without thinking, Dean reached over and tucked the strands behind his ear, fingers brushing his jaw a bit when he pulled away. Sam caught his hand before it fell back to his side.
"Dean," He didn't meet his eyes, but stared down at their hands instead, "You might be mad at me for bringing this up, but-"
"Then don't bring it up." The older Winchester snapped before he could stop himself. His mind started to reel, and God, he didn't need this. He tried to tug his hand away, but Sam got this look on his face... This look he'd seen before, that night when he pulled away from him and said he couldn't follow through. That's what made him stop, "Sammy."
"Why did you come back for me if you knew this would happen?" He didn't let go of Dean's hand, and he squeezed it, to make sure he was actually still there, "Dean, after... What he had, I always thought of you. Always, all the time. Not because you burned it into my brain, not because you 'ruined' me for anyone else. Because I wanted to. Every time my boyfriend would ask me to..." A sigh, and a slip of tightness on Dean's hand, "I-I would think about you. Lost a couple guys because I said your name instead. But I just couldn't help myself."
"...Boyfriends? Y-You actually had real boyfriends? Real relationships?" Dean wondered about this when they had been apart. He was glad Sammy had someone, or someones over the years that cared for him. He wished he would have been there to help out, to make sure they were good enough and would love him enough. But he knew there was no one out there good enough for Sam... His Sam.
"Yeah, I did. All nice guys, but I couldn't take my mind off you. I-I... I still love you, Dean." He looked up from their hands, and saw suddenly more nervous, feeling the need to speak, to get out the truth, "And I'm not too young now. I haven't been ruined, either. It's my decision to love you, and I do. You don't have excuses anymore. D-Do you want me or not? ... God, did you ever want me? Did you ever love me? Maybe I did something wrong, I'm sor-"
Lips smashed against his, hand in contact with his suddenly gripping. It took his breath away when he realized Dean was kissing him; actually kissing him. Soft, plump lips on his, moving against his. He leaned down a bit, returning the kiss, hearing Dean start to mumble something. He pulled back just a fraction of an inch to hear him, lips brushing and his tongue running along the bottom one.
"I always want you, always love you. I love you, Sam. So much, and what did I tell you never to do?" His voice was rough and deep, deeper than Sam had ever heard it. It made his spine tingle and his head spin. He couldn't think straight as his big brother engaged him in a soft kiss while he waited for an answer.
"N-Never... Never forget to clean the guns after a hunt?" The taller man mumbled, sounding dazed. Dean would have chuckled if it hadn't been such a serious thing he was trying to get across.
"No, Sammy. I love you, and you love me. And don't you ever fucking apologize for it." Dean told him sternly before he was kissing him again. Hard, rough and fast, to try to make up for all the time they spent fighting and upset. "I love you"s were mixed with the kiss, both of them trying to get it out, let it out and let it be heard. Dean grabbed him by the front of the shirt and pulled them out of the bathroom, not caring if he hurt himself, too busy kissing Sammy to think about it.
Sam steered them to the bed, thinking it be a much safer place than the wall or the table. But Dean wasn't having it. He stopped them in the middle of the room and pushed his hips against Sam's, not being able to wait. He got a moan.
"Dean, please." The younger man whimpered, tilting his head back so his brother could have more room to bite and lick down his throat.
"No." He growled, biting a mark into the skin, getting a growl to match his. That was something he'd never heard from his baby brother, deep and primal and wanting. Sam wanted more contact, and he realized was strong enough to get it now. He leaned down quickly and grabbed the backs of Dean's thighs, taking his brother by surprise when he hoisted him up.
He pressed their bodies together and groaned at the rough slide of hips, backing him into the wall with force. He ground up against him, legs going tight around his hips. Dean's head rolled back against the wall as he let out a groan, and Sam smirked evilly, attacking the older man's neck with his mouth. Kissing, biting, inhaling the hotel soap and dirt from the hunt, the smell of the Impala interior carrying with him. He always liked the engine oil and old leather smell if it was mixed with the sweet, natural, home scent of Dean. His body spray had mostly wore off from the day they'd had, but Sam still managed to smell it; cinnamon and some sort of musk. Sam loved how much Dean there was around him, embracing him. He couldn't get enough of it. The older Winchester wrapped his arms around his brothers shoulders, blunt nails digging into his back, making Sammy press against him tighter. It felt amazing to be sandwiched in between a cold wall and a hot and heavy Sam.
He took a fistful of shaggy hair and pulled his brother's head away from his neck. They met eyes for a moment before Dean sealed their lips, tongue slipping into Sam's already open and welcoming mouth. They both groaned and rutted up against each other, needy and not giving them time to think... Not that their thoughts would have been anything other than how good it felt to have the other close again. Sam broke the kiss suddenly, and Dean sucked in breath to protest, but Sam shushed him softly. He set him down, and the shorter man wondered why. Until Sam slipped to his knees.
His eyes widened as his little brother licked his lips, "Sam, you don't gotta-"
"I want to... I wanna taste you."
And Dean shivered at that. He'd been wanting to taste Sam for so long, and the kisses were more than satisfactory to his addiction, but he'd be needing more soon. Sam popped the button and pulled the zipper before he tugged the denim down from Dean's hips, fondling the bulge in his brother's boxers.
"Wanted this for so long, Dean. Wished you would've let me a long time ago." He said, voice dripping with sex as he looked up at his big brother. The older man pulled his lip between his teeth as he rocked softly into that big, strong hand. He'd wanted this, too. All the girls and guys over the years just hadn't done it for him; he loved Sam.
"I love you, Sammy." He whispered, and his brother smiled before hooking his thumbs in the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down.
Sam wet his lips and didn't waste any time, taking the tip of Dean's cock into his mouth, tasting the precome as his tongue swiped over the slit. The older brother gasped, one of his hands instinctively latching onto his hair, not guiding him just yet. He didn't know how much dick Sam had sucked, but he decided that he was damn good at it as he took more of Dean in, starting to suck. His tongue was slowly gliding down the underside, then stiffening as he pulled away, hollowing out his cheeks and gently moaning. He took him back in, bobbing his head slowly, just to get out more and longer sounds from his brother. Dean groaned and forced his eyes off Sammy so his head could rest back on the wall as he took a deep breath.
"God, Sam, that's good. Fucking professional cock sucker." He tightened the grip on his hair, and Sam moaned around him, most of him in his mouth. Dean's hips bucked a little, but tried to hold back. The younger man didn't seem to mind as he kept working, and Dean just went with it. He decided to talk more, remembering that his bedroom voice got his little Sammy off, "Gonna fuck you so good, like you need to be. How many good fucks you been given, baby?"
He looked down at Sam, expecting to see Sam slutty with a hand against his crotch, but he got his brother looking up at him, and he knew what it meant. He took a deep breath at the wave of pleasure that ran through him because of that look, and Sam moaned when he felt the heavy cock on his tongue twitch. He started to pick up the pace, wanting to taste Dean before he asked any more questions, but Dean wouldn't have that either. He pulled him off by tugging on his hair with a gentle hand. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and looked expectant up at his big brother. The older man held out a hand and Sam took it, standing up. His brother pulled his underwear back up but kicked off his jeans, then leaned up and attached his lips to the other's. Their kiss was short, but Sam still loved it. Dean's hands found the worn out hem of his shirt and pulled up, helping the taller man take it off.
"You're amazing, Sam." He ran a hand down the toned chest in front of him, feeling along the warm skin, slowly counting each abdomen muscle before his hand was on his brother's felt buckle.
Sam let out a shaky breath, "Take me to the bed, Dean. Please."
The older Winchester looked up at him, already moving away from the wall, leading Sam as he walked backwards to the bed, "I'm gonna make love to you. I'm gonna do it right."
The taller man went speechless and Dean smiled. He pushed Sam down onto the bed, eyes dark with lust and want. He climbed onto the bed, Sam opening his legs for him. He crawled in between them and immediately started kissing his chest, making his way down, tongue swirling down along the divots and valleys of his abdomen. Sam watched, hands balled into fists in the sheets at the sensations of that amazing tongue, his hips arching up for attention. He made a broken noise when a strong hand cupped him roughly through his jeans, rubbing him.
Dean chuckled softly and let go, both hands quickly undoing the belt buckle, then his jeans. His little brother lifted his hips and he tugged them off, along with his boxers, leaving him exposed. He looked at Sam's bare hips and strong legs, then his eyes fell on his cock. Sam was huge.
"Damn." He mumbled, and his brother chuckled. He looked up, seeing how amused he looked.
"I grew up, and so did you." The younger Winchester licked his lips, grabbing onto his brother's boxers and yanking them down. Dean kicked them away and leaned up, pressing their naked bodies together, both of them gasping softly. Sam's arms wrapped around him, as did his legs, and the older brother dipped his head down, capturing his lips. The younger man rocked his hips up into Dean's, listening to the noises that were made against his mouth.
"Dean," He ran his hands down his big brother's back, onto his ass, remembering the first time he saw it. Dean lurched forward slightly, but relaxed almost instantly, "My duffel."
He let go of his brother so he could get up, and the older Winchester reached over, keeping a hand on Sammy's inner thigh. His fingers glided across a scar that hadn't been there the last time he'd seen the other naked, and he felt protective instantly. He dragged his brother's bag over and grabbed the lube out of the bottom of the bag before leaning down and placing a kiss to the scar. Sam whimpered softly. Dean shushed him quietly, popping the cap open and squirting some onto his fingers.
"Don't be nervous... I'm already a little stretched." The younger brother said, blushing at the falter in Dean's movements when the words reached his ears. Dean composed himself and got close again, giving a smile to Sam before running a slick finger along his entrance. He licked his lips at feeling that his baby brother's hole was stretched, and it gave him assurance that he wouldn't be hurting him as he slipped a finger in.
Sam hummed in approval, head resting back on the pillows, ready to let Dean have him any way he wanted; every way. He licked his lips and gently inserted another finger next to the first, loving the way Sam's hips rocked up for more. He thrust them shallowly, listening to the soft groans his brother let out, and Dean thought maybe he meant to look as hot and slutty as he did.
"Oh God, Dean. Hurry up, I need you." Sam let out a breathy moan, and the shorter brunette crooked his fingers, watching Sammy's hips buck before he pulled the digits out.
The other man gave him a look, but he smirked, applying more lube to his palm to rub over his cock, "You ready for me, baby?"
"Please." The younger brother spread his legs wider, giving Dean all the room he needed, shivering as he pressed the slick tip against him. He leaned over his little brother, grabbing his wrists and pinning them against the mattress, making Sam chuckle softly and give an experimental tug.
"Mm." He relaxed and let out a deep breath, completely trusting. Dean smiled and kissed him as he carefully pushed his hips forward. Sam gasped at the feeling of his brother entering him, and the older Winchester pulled away to look at his face, one hand moving to push strands of hair from his face before it was back to his wrist. He stopped when he was fully in, placing soft kisses all over his brother's face, whispering about how good he was doing, how much Dean loved him. Sam felt loved, felt it blooming right in his chest, and it almost hurt at how good it felt.
He tugged against Dean's hands and shifted his hips up, letting him know it was okay to move. The older man gently rocked out then back in, both of them sucking in sharp breaths. Their first movements were slow, careful, Dean giving Sam room to tell him to stop if he realized this wasn't what he wanted. The younger man was reveling in the feeling of being filled up all the way for the first time. He felt complete with Dean, opposed to feeling like a freak deep down while he was at school. He felt like a piece of him was missing at school, and he knew it was his brother.
"Oh God, Sam. You're still so tight." The shorter brunette felt so sensitive, and Sam probably was feeling it too, and his heart was hammering in his chest for more than one reason. He squeezed Sammy's wrists as the other pulled and tugged, moaning softly.
"D-Dean, just a little faster. Please, I-I just... Ohh." Dean's hips bucked into him without permission from the owner and the taller man whimpered, closing his eyes at the too sudden movement. The other Winchester caught himself, cursing silently that his brother's voice could do that to him. He looked up at his little brother and his eyes widened.
"Oh, baby, I'm sorry." He placed kisses to his lips, getting soft ones in return, "I'm so sorry. You okay?"
"Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I'm fine." Sam nodded a little, taking a deep breath, opening his eyes to see Dean's concerned ones, "Keep going, I'm okay. I want this."
The older man took a moment, the nodded, reaching down and taking a hold of the backs of his brother's knees, bringing them up to hook around his hips, listening to the soft gasp. Sam wrapped his arms around the other's neck, letting his hands go into that short brown hair. Dean looked nervous as he started to rock again, and the younger man clenched around him, moaning quietly with his eyes on Dean. He leaned up and kissed him, catching him by surprise, but feeling it returned in seconds. Dean moved his lips slowly, trying to tame his hunger so his baby brother would be comfortable. Sam slipped his tongue into Dean's mouth, wet muscles rubbing against each other, the tip of the younger Winchester's swirling at his, enticing him into his own mouth. The shorter man took the bait and tasted his brother, groaning as he pushed forward again.
The younger man gripped harder to the other's hair, eliciting another groan. He wanted to make his big brother growl. He loved when he did that, and with Dean's deepened voice... Oh God, yes. He needed to hear it, but his brain momentarily stopped working when his hips were angled a bit differently and he saw stars. He gasped and moaned, hips bucking up for more of that amazing sensation. Dean chuckled against his lips before pulling away, mouth moving to suckle on Sam's jaw and neck, thrusts getting faster. His hair was tugged again with a whimper of his name, making him roughly shove his hips forward, hitting that spot inside Sammy. The other Winchester threw his head back onto the pillow and made a loud, deep, ragged sound that had Dean's spine tingling.
He breathed harshly against his brother's neck, "Oh, I love those sounds, Sammy. That's so good."
Sam whined softly, trying for more, "Dean, please. Fuck, I need-I need it harder."
The older man obliged, snapping his hips harder, sitting up slightly for more force. Sam laid his arms back on the mattress, looking up at Dean's sweaty and toned body, muscles in his stomach clenching with every thrust. His face was flushed and determined, but also so full of pleasure. Sam had the urge to kiss him again. He was about to reach up when a violent hit to his sweet spot made him cry out. Dean watched him closely, listening to him pant and moan for him after, loving every sound he made. He felt on edge, but kept going, holding back his own release until Sam came apart. He wrapped a hand around his brother's cock and pumped quickly, trying not to get too excited from the whimper of his name. Sam couldn't think straight with all the pleasure coursing through his system, but he tried to. Tried to get out what he wanted, seeing as he wouldn't last much longer.
He managed "Dean" and "closer" and "so close". Dean seemed to understand. He leaned back down, reluctantly taking his hand away from his little brother's length so he could support his weight. Sam moaned and tightened his legs around him, feeling as his big brother buried his face in his neck. He pinned the taller man's hands and laced their fingers together, pounding his hips into Sam with a growl. The younger Winchester faltered, body tensing as he let out a long, deep groan, spurts of white suddenly covering their stomachs. That threw Dean over the edge, voice scratchy and wrecked as he groaned, mumbling Sammy's name over and over again, filling his brother up. The younger man moaned softly, voice crackling softly around the edges, rocking his hips as they both rode it out.
They took a moment, hips slowing. The older man sucked in a deep breath, "I love you so much, Sammy."
He managed a very breathy chuckle, smiling with his eyes closed as Dean squeezed his hands before letting go, "I love you, too, Dean."
"You really didn't let anyone do this to you before?" The shorter man asked softly, although he had a feeling it was true.
"I always topped," Sam opened his eyes and took a deep breath, let it out, then took another, "I wouldn't let anyone else."
"Just me?"
"Only you. I only wanted you."
Dean picked his head up, smile gracing his features, Sam loving the crinkles around his eyes, the joy spread across his entire face, "Come here, you."
He pressed their mouths together, a soft, happy kiss, both of them sighing as they calmed down. The other's legs dropped carefully to the sides, and the older Winchester took the moment to gently withdraw his softening length from his little brother. He kissed away the whimper of loss, and kissed some more before they needed to breathe again. He pushed the damp from sweat hair away from Sam's face, and asked him if he was okay, happy when he nodded. They got up and went to the bathroom, making the shower warm before they stepped in, not wanting to be apart even though the space was cramped. They washed each other off, getting nice and clean before Dean got out early to take the sheets off the bed. He put new ones on, even though there were two beds in the room, actually smelling the cleanness on them, then got clothes for him and Sam, about to put them on when he entered the room.
"Hi." The taller man smiled, rubbing a towel over his hair while another was wrapped around his hips. Dean beckoned him over with the wave of a hand and a smile, handing him the clothes. They got dressed, feeling sated and sleepy, both of them just about falling into bed together, facing each other.
Sam cuddled, as well as a man his size could, into the warmth of his brother's arms, head settled against his chest, almost tucked under his jaw. He had one arm around Dean's waist, and Dean's were supporting his head and around his shoulder. The older man shifted himself just a little closer, leg wrapping around Sammy's, feeling the chuckle against his shirt. He placed a kiss to his hairline and smiled, mumbling a goodnight and i love you before shutting his eyes. He faintly heard Sam do the same before he drifted to sleep. It was perfect; they were complete.
After a few days, they went to see Bobby, and parted hands as the door swung open. They smiled, and Bobby inspected them, smiling as he noticed how close they were standing, "Hey boys, come in."
They both mumbled a word of thanks before entering the house, "We thought we'd drop in, say hi." Dean said. Even though he wanted to find Dad, Bobby was important, too.
Sam followed his brother into the kitchen, noticing the small mess of bowls and pans, "Been cooking, Bobby?"
"Yeah. Was making cobbler when you two came knocking." The elder hunter went over to the fridge, taking out a few beers and passing one to each of the brothers before opening his own.
"I can finish it if you want." Sam offered, opening his drink and taking a sip. He almost chuckled at how he could still taste Dean on his lips from when they kissed in the car.
"Sure, Sam. Thanks." Bobby smiled, sitting down across from the older Winchester, "So, how have you boys been? Heard about your funeral, Dean. 'Bout scared me half to death."
Dean chuckled, "Yeah, kind of a crazy hunt. But we're all good."
Sam turned his head just so, catching his brother smile at him, and he grinned back. Bobby noticed. He was starting to wonder when the kids would just tell me already; he could tell they were closer again, warmer to each other, more than when Sam left for college. It broke his heart to see the boys hot hug, not look each other in the eye even though they took in the other's appearance like they were about to die. He was more than happy to see them happy, especially with each other.
"So, anything you two wanna talk about?" They both shook their heads. Bobby scoffed, "Come on, I ain't an idiot. I know about you two."
"Well... I know you know about me." Sam spoke up cautiously. He'd talked with Bobby over the years, on and off, and he had been told about Sam being gay. He hadn't told anyone, kept up the silent promise he'd made to the boy, because it wasn't his secret to tell.
"Yeah, but..." He looked to Dean, who was downing half his beer, eyes not on either of the others. He looked nervous of being pushed away, of being written off, and that made Sam nervous.
"Son, you can tell me," Bobby coaxed, taking a moment before looking up at Sam, who had stopped cooking, "I don't have anything against it, I didn't when you two were kids, either."
Dean faltered slightly, almost choking on his beer, thinking that all these years that they had hidden it quite well. Sam was at his side, patting his back as he coughed, "You knew?"
The elder hunter nodded, "Knew something was up with you two. Dean came to me about a promise he made but was scared, then I heard both of you fighting that one day. I thought everything was gonna be fine after that, seein' as both of you were so close. But I guess not. It's better now, right?"
Sam nodded even though Dean was a little hesitant, "You don't hate us?"
"'Course not. You two never had normal lives, why should you two being together be banned?" He said, honestly not minding. He always knew that they'd need each other, and if they had each other in this way, then he was fine with it. Sure, he didn't want to see them freely making out on his couch, but he still loved them like his own and wanted them happy.
"Did you tell Dad?" Sam asked, hating to think there would be fatherly wrath when they found him. He was always scared Dad would find out about him, hate him, not want him anymore. He stilled loved his father, no matter how much they fought or disagreed.
"Nope, kept my mouth shut. I thought I'd wait until you were ready, but it's right in front of my face now, so I thought I'd say I accept 'ya."
The brothers took a moment, giving a look to one another before thanking their father figure. They wouldn't have to hide from at least one person, and when they found Dad, they hoped it would be the same way.