Chapter One

"Hey, Lily!" James shouted across the common room. I ignored him and kept talking to Marlene, looking determinedly anywhere but him.

"—so do you think Sirius will ask me out soon?" Mar asked in a hushed tone. Exasperated, I set down my quill and looked at my best friend. She's been asking that for the past ten minutes and it's not making my History of Magic essay (that's due the next morning) any easier. "Well, do you?" Marlene tugged at the sleeve of my robes.

"Why don't you just ask him?" I tried my best not to sound impatient.

"NO!" Marlene squealed. Well, can't blame me for trying.

"Mar, look, I love you, but I need to get this essay finished. I still need twelve more inches!" I brandished my almost-blank piece of parchment at her to emphasize my point. "So, I'm just going to get this Sirius business over with then we're all happy."

Without waiting for her answer, I dropped my roll of parchment on the table and marched over to where the Marauders sat within a circle of admiring girls. Remus was trying to do his Transfiguration homework, but a blonde girl kept stroking his hair. James wasn't looking at any of the tittering females that surrounded him, but rather was doodling on library books as usual. Peter was left unwanted out of the circle, but Sirius was enjoying the attention. Though I despise Potter to death, Remus, Sirius, and Peter were some of my best friends. To this day, I still can't figure out how such an arrogant prat like him managed to snag such good friends who stuck with him for three years.

"Lily!" the idiot yelled as I approached and carelessly pushed a skinny brunette aside. Giving me a dirty look, she and her friends flipped their blonde or brown hair and pranced off; I shook my own dark red hair out of my eyes and dared them to make fun of it. I pulled out my wand and poked James squarely in the chest.

"Out of my way, Potter," I growled. No one messed with Lily Evans when she's got her wand out. I turned to Sirius and just for the pleasure of seeing Potter's reaction, said sweetly, "Paddy, c'mere. I need to talk to you about something."

Remus and Peter stared; James glowered at his best mate as I led him to a secluded spot where no one can overhear us. "What the hell was that about, Lily?" he scratched his head as he hoisted himself up on a table. "You never call me 'Paddy', it's more like 'Black' or 'Sirius' or 'stupid git'."

"Very funny, Black," I replied. "I did that to make James jealous."

Then, I knew I said the wrong thing because Sirius got this sly smirk that only came up when he was up to no good. Which is most of the time. "Make him jealous, eh? Gonna have a little affair, are we, Evans?"

I shoved him away, well aware of the burning lasers that were the eyes of Marlene McKinnon and James Potter, watching us like hawks. "Be serious, Black." I hissed. Before he had time to reply with the overused pun, I cast a Silencing Charm. "Just listen to me!"

He nodded mutely.

"Will you effing ask Marlene out already? She's driving me mad!" I dropped the bomb without warning. He pointed to his mouth and I performed the counterspell.

"Okay, sure. What date?" he asked. "Do we have a Hogsmeade trip this week?"

My eyes widened. That was a lot easier than I thought it would be. "There's a Hogsmeade weekend this Saturday, so you better ask her soon. You do like her though, right?" I asked cautiously. Sirius was a well-known player.

He nodded in what I like to call the duh manner. "Duh, great hair, nice smile, even nicer body. What's not to like?"

"And this time you're not just looking for a snog, right?" I pressed Sirius, who nodded again.

"And you won't see other girls behind her back, right?"

Sirius tried to look innocent. "What other girls?" he gulped visibly.

I pulled out my wand a third time. "You know what other girls I'm talking about, Black." I snarled. "For instance, your fan club over there—" I pointed to the group of girls that had encircled the Marauders earlier. "—and I saw that slutty Ravenclaw Maria batting her eyes at you today at dinner." My wand was getting dangerously close to the bridge of his nose.

"I promise I won't! Geez, woman, relax!" he spluttered. I tucked my wand away, satisfied. As much as an idiot and a git as he is, I've never known Sirius Black to break a promise before. "Now, what about that affair?" he wagged his eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes and gave him a bright red lipstick stain on his cheek. He barked like a dog and pranced over to Potter.

"Lookie here, Jamie boy!" he yelled, twirling around like a ballerina, minus the grace factor. "See this? It's from Evans, mate!"

James stared, apparently too stunned to reply. Remus and Peter turned to look and promptly fell of their chairs. I giggled quietly to myself. The "lipstick stain" I'd given Sirius had morphed into the words "I am a slick git" and was flashing in Gryffindor colors. I could hear Remus howling with uncontrolled laughter under the table and James turned to me with a huge grin on his face. "That is amazing, Lily!"

Giving him a two-finger salute, I returned to my table where Marlene has tears of mirth running down her cheeks and our other best friend, Alice, was rolling on the worn carpet laughing, just like everyone else in the common room. "Dammit, Lily!" Sirius roared, trying to scrape the letters off without success. "I'll get you back for this!"

"Be my guest," I replied, picking up my quill once more. Without Marlene pecking at me every few seconds, I finished the 14-inch essay easily. She even got up the nerve to go and talk to Sirius for a while, albeit with Alice at her side.

Soon, it was around ten forty-five and people were drifting off to bed, some still coming up and high-fiving me for the prank on Sirius. I was reading a Charms assignment when I saw a shadow over me. It was James, as usual. I closed my eyes and groaned to myself. "Hi Lily, that's was a pretty sweet prank you pulled on Sirius," he grinned and sat down in an armchair across from me. Marlene, who was drawing a diagram of a bowtruckle for Sprout before Potter arrived, nudged Alice and they took their books and left for the dormitory, winking at me. Such nice friends I have.

"What do you want, Potter?" I snapped, reminding myself of Professor McGonagall. He looked hurt and a tiny prick of guilt rose up inside me.

You didn't have to be so mean, it whispered.

Shut it, I snarled. "James, just spit it out." I sighed.

"Well, I was wondering if you'd come to Hogsmeade with me—"

I cut him off. "No."

His eyes took on this wide-eyed, puppy-dog look.

See how sad and depressed you make him? That goddamned voice spoke again. I imagined cursing it into oblivion.

"Why do you always say no to me, Lily?" He did look sad and depressed.

"Because I don't like you, Potter," I snapped.

"You like Sirius well enough. And Remus. Even Peter," he countered.

"First of all, you shouldn't be insulting your friend like that. Peter is really nice, just a bit slow at times. Second of all, none of them come up to me every effing day, when I'm trying to work or relax, asking me to go out with them!" I snarled and slammed my book shut. Grabbing my bag, I stormed up the girls' staircase but made the mistake of looking over my shoulder. James hadn't moved, but still sat where I left him, gazing dejectedly at me. Green eyes met hazel, but I looked away quickly and fled to the dormitory.

Alice, Marlene, Dorcas Meadowes, and Mary MacDonald were all sitting on their beds, looking expectantly at me. "Well?" Mar demanded.

"Sirius said that you had nice hair—" I began but Alice interrupted.

"No one cares about Black, Lils—" Marlene pouted at this. "Tell us about your little chat with James!"

"What's there to tell about?" I dumped my bag under my bed. "He asked me out again, and I said no. It's the usual routine." At this, all four girls exchanged looks. "What?" I demanded.

Brave Dorcas spoke up. "Lily, you've got to put him out of his misery. He doesn't even play Quidditch well anymore!" I groaned.

"That's just the problem, Dor! I can't! He's such a spoiled brat, he gets everything he wants. Except me. And I am not going to give the satisfaction." I changed into my pajamas.

"Lily, you think this is like a game or something for him." Mary chimed in.

"That's because it is!" I threw my hands up, all patience gone. "Pester Lily until she gives in, snog her a few times, then a week later, toss her aside and start flirting with another girl."

Alice put down her diary and looked at me, sighing. "Lily, I've told you before and I'm going to tell you again: James Potter truly loves you. You're not a prize for him to win; and after he's got you he won't throw you away."

"Oh please, Alice. We're fourteen, for Merlin's sake, how're we supposed to know what love is? Besides, he's a player. He just likes me because he thinks I'll be good to snog, that's all." I answered. Dorcas pulled back her covers and sat up with a determined look in her dark eyes that I didn't like.

"First year, he gave you his mandrake to work with when Professor Sprout accidentally ran out." She said.

"Like that was a treat. Those bloody mandrakes are nearly as ugly as he is," I snorted.

"He wanted you to have a good grade," Alice reasoned, getting into bed.

"Second year, he lied for you after him and you and Black and were caught smuggling candy from Honeydukes." Dorcas continued.

"It was his stupid idea to go to Honeydukes in the first place! But none of them could perform the spell to open the passageway so they dragged me along too." I argued.

Mary shrugged. "So? He could've blamed it on you but he said it was all his idea and had to do a detention with Filch."

We all shuddered, knowing full well Filch would love to hang all misbehaving students by our ankles with a metal chain from the ceiling, and it was only Dumbledore's power that protected us from that.

"And last year, remember? In Slughorn's class you forgot to do your essay and he covered for you by saying he kept you up all night begging you to go out with him. That was funny, that was." Mar ended with a chuckle.

My cheeks became as red as my hair. "That was embarrassing!"

"Hey, old Sluggy bought it." Dor inserted. "And you know that he's got this strict rule of detention every day of the week if someone's missing his homework."

"Not that he would've handed a week straight of detentions to his Lovely Lily, he loves you nearly as much as James," Marlene joked, which earned a round of high-fives from our friends and a glare from me.

"James Potter is a vile, arrogant toerag," I exclaimed. "I can't believe you guys are sticking up for him and not me."

Dorcas piped up. "Actually, he's not that bad on the Quidditch pitch,"

Grudgingly, I had to agree with her. As stupid as he is, Potter has a surprisingly caring side for his teammates. "But we're not talking about Quidditch, we're talking about I'm a prize for him," I reminded everyone.

"Oh yeah," Mary remembered.

"Lily, can't you see?" He's never gone out with a single girl before, surely you've noticed?" Alice said.

I squinted, trying to recall my first two year at Hogwarts. Even back then, a girl was always on Sirius's arm and all the Marauders were swarmed with fans (much like now, nothing's changed much), James never had a girlfriend in his three previous, glorious years at Hogwarts. He pays as much attention to his battalions of admiring girls stalking him as an extra-large box of Cockroach Clusters.

"Okay, so you guys have a point, but Potter will never get to me," I vowed and climbed underneath the warm covers. Following my lead, the others did the same and distinguished their wands and bedside candles.

"G'night, everyone," I whispered into the darkness.

"Night," Dorcas whispered back, and after the flurry of "Goodnight" and "Sweet dreams," we all fell silent. Soon, a soft snore signaled that Mary was already deep in dreamland, but I was still wide-awake, thinking about the things that my best friends had said. Then, that annoying little voice returned.

Think about it, Lily, it hissed.

Go away, I yelled in my brain. To avoid my conscience (Oh, so that's what the voice is), I turned over and tried to force my brain to shut down and sleep. It worked, as I soon fell into a very restful sleep. It seemed like only a few seconds, however, because the next I know, bright sunlight was streaming through the windows, and Marlene was shaking me awake.

"Lily, get up! We're going to be late for class!" her voice was a tad loud and I winced as I slowly got up and rubbed my eyes.

"What time is it?" I asked groggily.

"Eight-forty something," Alice answered, pulling on her robes.

"Damn it!" I yelped. "Eight-forty! Sweet Merlin, guys, why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

"We tried, but you kept pushing us away and mumbling 'go away'." Dorcas rolled her eyes.

Frantically, I jumped out of bed and pulled on my robes and grabbed my tie and hat. Then, after shoving my quills, parchment, and books into my bag, I yanked a brush through my sleep-tousled hair and ran down the staircase, yelling over my shoulder, "Thanks guys!"

I charged through the common room and out the portrait hole, thoroughly alarmed by the fact that no one was there and all were either eating breakfast or heading for their classes. Was I really that late? As I ran, I put on my tie and jammed the pointed black hat onto my head. Out of breath and panting, I reached the Great Hall. It was empty. Save for a couple of plates with some leftover bacon. My panic amounted. I've never been late for a class before, in all my three and a half years at Hogwarts. I scanned the entire Hall, but not a single student was there.

"HAH!" Someone screamed from behind me. I spun around, and my hand flew to my heart. James and Sirius stood there, looking snarky and triumphant.

"Told you I'll get you back, Evans," Black said coolly, though I noticed that his face still had the letters "I am a slick git" flashing feebly. He noticed me looking and scowled, covering the cheek with a hand.

"How does the damned thing come off, anyway?" He growled.

"It comes off when you stand up at dinner and yell 'I am a slick git' for the whole school to hear. And what do you mean, 'get me back'?" I asked.

He snorted. "As if I'll ever fall for that one," but didn't answer my question.

"See for yourself, and in the meanwhile, enjoy being a slick git. Now if you two would excuse, I'm going to class." I turned on my heel, but haven't walked two paces when I heard Sirius roaring with laughter.

"Oh, my dear, stupid Evans. I always knew you were an overachiever, but not to the point of this!" He doubled over and clutched his stomach. I crossed my arms and looked at him.

"And exactly what do you mean by that, Black?" I said coldly.

Looking torn between sympathy and mirth, Potter compromised my holding his watch out for me to see, all the while trying not to laugh. The hands read seven-thirty. Slowly, realization dawned on me.

"I assume that the girls are in on the plot as well?" I tried to state the question as dignified as possible, already planning revenge.

"You assume correctly," Sirius answered haughtily.

"This means war, Black," I growled.

"Bring it on, Evans." He growled back. "Jamie boy here will help me, won't you, James?"

James looked torn. "Er, yeah, of course."

I started back the way I came, calling over my shoulder. "By the way, Black, the spell to get rid of the letters is Espitolios Dulicies."

"HA! I knew you were lying to me, Evans!" Sirius yelled after me.

I smiled to myself as I heard him cast the spell.

"So…is it off?" he asked James. I prayed that he would play along.

"Yeah, it is." I heard Potter say, and made a mental note to thank him later.

I sped back to the common room and ran up the stairs. "ALICE! MARLENE! DORCAS! MARY! YOU GUYS ARE DEAD TO ME!" I screamed when I got near the dormitory. I heard a muffled "Oh no" and some scuffling sounds. I smiled again and pulled out my wand. Watch out, world, I thought. Lily Evans is about to happen.