Two Steps Forward

Zuko rolled onto his side and looked out of his bedroom window. There wasn't even the slightest hint of sunlight on the horizon. It felt weird to be sleeping in his old bed at their Ember Island home again, and he blamed that for his inability to sleep through the night, not the waterbender next to him. Sleeping. In the same bed. Fuckin Agni.

He sighed and shifted trying not to move too much and risk waking Katara. She got cranky when someone woke her up in the middle of the night, but right now was probably the best time to wake her up. He could feel her moving behind him, so she couldn't have been too asleep. The covers rustled and she sighed. That wasn't a sigh of frustration. Zuko swallowed, squeezed his eyes shut. Concentrated. He needed to wake her and sneak her back to her own room. Then he would go for a good, long walk and think about sad things, and all the danger they were in, and all the possible ways they could die.

"Mmmm, Zuko."

Holy shit, he knew that sound. His first instinct was to roll over and see what she was doing. But what if she was asleep and didn't know? Like hell she didn't, that's not something you do in your sleep. Which would mean she was awake. Did she think he was still sleep? Great sages, now she was moaning!

Zuko's heart beat fast, and his mouth was dry. They hadn't talked about going even this far. Sure, there'd been a lot of kissing and touching, sometimes full out grinding, but they had both acknowledged that they were hormonal teenagers in a stressful situation, and it's not like either of them had really gotten off. And sure, he dreamed about moments like this, and in those dreams, he would always roll over and do the job for her, and do it so spectacularly that she would never want to do it herself again, because, really, why would she? But those were silly boy fantasies.

"Ah!" She arched her back, and he felt her ass rub his, and he very clearly remembered the feel of it in his hands.

No, this wasn't some stupid fantasy. This was real.

Zuko tried to conjure any image that would blot out Katara. Shit, Sokka would kill him. The covers rustled faster, and there was no doubt that Katara was awake (wait, was that her hand on his thigh?), because now she was on her back, and really, this is the point where he should stop her because she was rolling her hips against her hand, clenching her legs together, pinching her nipples.

But it would also be rude if he stopped her now. He didn't want to be a prick.

"Zuko, yes!" She was breathing hard. He was thinking about Azula shooting Uncle with lightning. "Please! Oh, please…"

Fuck.

She came at the same time he jumped out of the bed, and they locked eyes, both breathing heavily.

"Ok! Ok," he said, hands out like he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have. "What the hell, Katara?"

She looked at him for a few moments, one hand down her pants. Fuckin Agni, he didn't wonder what she looked like without that shirt. He didn't. That was the truth. Honestly.

He closed his eyes, turned his back to her, concentrated on slow, even breaths, and coming up with reasons why this was so completely wrong. He could hear her moving behind him.

"We shouldn't…you…no." Zuko glanced over his shoulder. She was propped up on one elbow, her mouth hanging open.

"I'm, I'm sorry. I didn't think…well, we'd been…" She bit her lip, looked away. Slid further under the covers. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

Uncomfortable isn't what he would call it, and he wasn't even sure how to begin to have this conversation.

"It's just that we had rules, and I thought we were, you know. Planning on sticking to them." Zuko turned around, arms crossed, slightly embarrassed and hoping she didn't look too far down.

"Oh."

He was fucking it up again. "No! No, it's not that…not that you're not…" he gestured at her, smiled hopefully, knowing she wouldn't understand what he was trying to say.

He had no idea where their boundaries were, especially since she decided to push things. He'd always been careful to let her make the first move, and until now, those had been little moves. He never wanted her to feel like he was making her do something that she didn't want to do. But now? This was a huge move. He wasn't sure that she was ready. Hell, he wasn't sure he was ready.

"I'm glad about that," she said, her head tilted to one side. Zuko wasn't sure that his message got across, and had no idea what she was trying to tell him. Uncle would not be proud of his communication skills.

You should go ashore, nephew. Spend time in the town, nephew. Talk to people, nephew. No one has to know who you are, nephew. She's a pretty girl, nephew. Might as well take advantage of this trip, nephew. She's not a spy, nephew, she just likes you. Go on this date, nephew. Play nice, nephew.

Fuckin Uncle. Only now he wished he'd listened.

Katara pulled the blanket off, swung her feet to the floor. "I didn't mean…. I'll just go back to my room."

"No!" Now he was sounding desperate.

Katara looked at him now, from head to toe, eyes lingering. Shit. She smiled slightly, didn't move from the bed. Zuko walked over and sat down next to her. She put her hand on his thigh, looked at him expectantly.

"Is this ok?"

He smiled and nodded, put his hand over hers. On those few occasions where he did take the lead in pushing their boundaries, he'd always asked her if it was ok. If she hesitated too much, he'd back off, saving them both from that awkward "no." He squeezed her hand.

"It's just that we haven't exactly had that conversation yet, you know? And it's kind of a big step." He stopped and looked at her, hoping to judge her reaction. She was listening, nodding in agreement.

"I'm sorry that I made you uncomfortable."

She's just a girl, nephew, they only bite if you want them to.

Zuko smiled. Stupid Uncle. "Uncomfortable's not the word I would use."

She blushed, then he blushed, and he felt like a fumbling kid all over again.

"I mean, it makes sense why you chose me. Sokka's your brother, Aang's twelve, so that'd be kind of sick if you were fantasizing about him… Shit." Zuko wilted. "I mean, not that… I'm not saying you're weird or anything, because I know Aang, and you, and. And…"

Katara was looking at him, her mouth open. She huffed, then slowly crossed her arms, and he tried not to notice how more skin peeked out of her loosened shirt. He took a deep breath and kept going.

"I mean, kissing you is really nice. Really, really nice, because you're not a dead fish or anything—it's a fucking compliment!—because Mai's not really the passionate type, and you're nice." Now she was scowling at him. "You're passionate, and I'm passionate, and together, and we're like opposites, but we have so much in common." He wasn't making any sense, and now he could see her starting to smile. Fuck her. But not literally, because he didn't think they were there yet.

"You're sitting there all smug, letting me make a shit of myself, and I'm trying my hardest to tell you…I don't know what. That we need to have a talk about where this is all going, about what we are, why we're even bothering." He nodded. "So there."

She uncrossed her arms and absently started rubbing his thigh while she looked at him.

"Please don't do that," he said, gulping.

"But I thought—"

"Not right now. I can't…I won't be able to concentrate on what you're saying."

She smiled, kissed his cheek. "What I'm saying is that I wouldn't mind if we took things a step further. But I don't think I've been completely honest with you."

"I know."

"It's just… Wait, what? What do you mean you know?"

"I've seen you weighing us against each other. Me and Aang. Everyone knows he likes you."

Katara winced. "Even Sokka?"

"He might have been the first. Sokka's not as dense as you think he is. Well, not all the time, at least."

They sat in silence for so long that it wasn't their usual comfortable silence. It was awkward and heavy.

"It's ok that you don't know."

"Why do we have to call it anything?"

"Because! That's just the way things work."

"Can't we just call it a thing?"

"A thing?"

"Yes," she said, nodding emphatically. "You and I have a thing, and no one has to know about it. It can be ours." She looked at him earnestly, and Zuko really wanted to know when his life started turning in this direction. Suddenly, he was having a thing with the Avatar's would-be girlfriend.

While he was busy contemplating everything, Katara straddled him, lowering herself right on top of him and sending most coherent thought out the window. And dammit, it's not like she was sitting still on his lap, either, and he could still remember her moaning his name.

"I like you, Zuko, I do. You're easy to talk to, you understand that sometimes it's best not to talk. You don't judge me or take me for granted. For being a spoiled prince, you complain the least when I expected nothing to be good enough for you. I can think of worse people to have a thing with."

He wasn't sure if she'd heard him when he said he wanted to concentrate on what she was saying, because now she was wiggling, probably trying to get comfortable, and his main focus was trying not to thrust against her, or throw her on the bed. He opened his mouth to tell her so, but she started moving her hips side to side, and fuckin Agni that felt good.

"Mmmm, again."

When she quickly caught on to his meaning, moving from side to side again, he couldn't help himself. He pushed into her, and she gasped. This went way beyond any grinding or rubbing they had done before. They'd agreed never the sleep in their regular pajamas when they shared a bed for exactly this reason. The more clothes they had to take off, the longer they had to come to their senses.

He ignored rational impulses, grabbed her hips, and began guiding them into a rhythm. She got it. Of course she would. She's a waterbender, and waterbending's all about rhythm and flowing.

Zuko leaned his head back, away from Katara, and breathed from his mouth. The night was warm, but steam came from him anyway. Taking advantage of his exposed neck, Katara leaned down, began kissing and sucking as he had done to her earlier that day (or was it yesterday?). Zuko's breathing quickened, and he could feel the fire travelling from the pit of his stomach and up his throat. The air heated around them. She began moving against him faster, and his hands moved down until he was grabbing her ass, helping her get more friction.

"Bite me," he commanded, and she did, taking the skin of his neck between her teeth. Great Agni above, she had him spitting fire, now.

"So," she said, her lips trailing down his neck. "We have so little to ourselves." Kiss, kiss. "No one would have to know." Bite. "Just you and me." Fuckin Agni, now she was sucking on a spot just below his jaw. At some point, his eyes rolled back into his head. "I do like you, Zuko. You make me feel wanted."

When she started moving in circles, he lost it, and at the moment when he would have agreed to anything, she asked if it was ok, and he said yes. He was pretty sure he said it several times, and that she had smiled in triumphant satisfaction. And had still looked triumphant and satisfied as she quietly went back to her own room. What. The Hell.

Uncle would laugh at how he'd just been played.

A/N: Wow. I can't believe I never uploaded this to . This is actually one of the first fics I wrote for Avatar. It's fun to see the way my style has changed as I've settled into a voice for both Zuko and Katara. Timeline wise, this would fit somewhere in chapter 3 of When We Were Young.