He Meant It
by Sleepy Raindrop
Summary: He meant it, he always did, it just took him a little while to realize it.
Important: Flashback, 'thoughts'
Disclaimer: I could never own the fantastic Vampire Knight series/animation, sadly.
AN:I love this pairing to death, but its sooo hard to find! After I saw 'The Azure Portrait' and I saw little Kaname and Hanabusa, looking sooo cute, I was like 'young love'. I've only recently been introduced to this fantastic series (about a month ago) so I was extremely disappointed when they didn't make season 3 so I started to actually read the magna which I'm about to read the 3rd volume right now. Anyway, back on topic, It's really hard to find Aido/Kaname fics/vids so after a little while I was just like whatever I'm going to write one. Apparently, I had nothing to do so I did. I saw a Kaname/Aido video that inspired this, but the plot doesn't go with it at all. I would put the link up here but the site would eat it sooo if you go to YouTube and search 'Kaname/Aido Behind These Hazel Eyes' you will find it. Watch it if you have time because it is amazing. Drop a comment by as well if you can :) I hope this is alright. I'm really nervous because this is my first Aido/Kaname fanfiction.
Aido looked out across the green field, glazed over with a dying light. The Sun didn't bother him as much as it used to. But as he aged, not visibly, he supposed it came with it. He no longer cringed at the sharp light that seemed to be a slight bothersome to every vampire. The light was welcome and warm despite his depressed mood.
The glass of the window felt cool and nice against his forehead. It helped numb his thoughts, his emotions that seemed to be getting the better of him now more than ever. He wasn't purposely trying to get frustrated or angry at every little detail, it just happened. Things weren't going well with him.
It was just…frustrating knowing that you are absolutely hopeless and useless. All he ever wanted to do was please him, Kaname Kuran, and yet it seemed to have the opposite effect. He just seemed to anger the pureblood more. What was he doing wrong?
He sighed and flicked his eyes down to the cracked blue marble that he was rolling between his fingers.
"So Hanabusa, did you really refuse to become friends with Lord Kaname?" A young girl with creamy colored hair asked.
Aido flicked his eyes up to her, looking utterly annoyed at being disturbed. Did no one understand that he was trying to do an experiment at the current moment?
"Huh?" He asked slightly startled at the accusation and wondering where she found out that information.
"Akatsuki told me you met Lord Kaname. What was he like? I've heard he's really handsome, smart, kind and admirable." The young girl gushed with excitement.
Of course it was his cousin who told Ruka that.
If it were possible, he got even more annoyed. He tried to resist the temptation to roll his eyes at her.
"Not really." He huffed out of annoyance.
He continued to run his hands through the sand and pack it down, trying to keep himself busy or at least give the idea that he was so no more questions would be asked about the 'precious' Lord Kaname.
Gentle footfalls could be heard as the neared closer. Everyone's eyes snapped up to see who the intruder was.
Aido was looking even more annoyed. Couldn't he just build a sand castle without someone interrupting, just once?
A few feet away stood a familiar pureblood. His raven hair was slightly long and his eyes looked like orbs of red wine. He was slightly taller than the blonde haired aristocrat and held more responsibility.
His eyes gentle locked with Hanabusa's, whose eyes looked like the ocean waters, and a soft smile graced his face, just for him.
At that point Aido's annoyance faded and his heartbeat seemed to speed up. It was scary knowing that someone could affect him in such a way, a way that he never knew off.
He didn't like the vulnerability, however, so he forced out whatever that had been and masked on the annoyance he held before.
"Good evening." The pureblood said softly as his eyes were still on Aido who had turned to look at everything else besides him.
"Good evening." Ruka said with admiration.
Aido tried not to roll his eyes for the second time that night.
"Hanabusa," The raven-haired vampire said with a gentle tone as he walked toward him.
He tried not to be startled by the way the pureblood said his name. He couldn't pinpoint what it held or indicated, but it was….different than the way he said everything else.
"May I have a word with you?" He asked kindly, still holding a soft smile.
That smile made his heart stuttered, but he slammed down the unfamiliar emotion and replaced it with annoyance.
"I'm doing an experiment to test the strength of sand materials, right now." He huffed out, looking at the sand 'experiment' rather than the pureblood.
He harshly dipped his hand in a bucket of light blue, his favorite color, marbles.
"I don't want you interfering." He said with an agitated tone as he tugged his hand full of marbles out of the red bucket and rolled them off his fingers. All but one went into the intended tube.
It rolled on the concrete ground, the moonlight casting a sharp glow as it hit it, and stopped at Kaname's feet.
He gently knelt down and picked up the marble between two fingers, his eyes wandering over the marble, inspecting it with soft interest.
His eyes changed to a soft worriment and sadness.
"It just appears to me that I've done something to make you angry." He said carefully as he flicked his eyes to the younger male's.
"All I wanted was to apologize so I asked to come back here." He leaned over the distance between them and gently took Hanabusa's hand in his and slipped the marble into the palm of his hand. The contact, though small, affected him in that unfamiliar way again. He felt himself grow slightly confused as Kaname's hands lingered, one cupping the back of his hand to maintain the contact and the other was slipped over his, the marble nestled between them. The pureblood's fingers softly brushed his palm.
"I'm truly sorry." The pureblood said with honesty.
'Is he stupid?' Hanabusa thought, 'He didn't do anything wrong.'
He felt a dull ache in his chest at Kaname's statement and accusation. It was guilt.
He turned his head to the side, trying to mask the rising guilt bubbling in his chest before he saw a shadow lurking in the corner. He turned his head fully to the shadow and saw that it was a man. He was leaning against the brick wall, eyes focusing in on the pair.
"Um."
Kaname followed his line of sight and saw that it was his bodyguard watching over him with intent.
"Oh him, no need to worry about him." Kaname said remembering that he did in fact have one lurking in the back, watching his every move. He supposed he forgot about it. He was also slightly annoyed at the bodyguard for no apparent reason.
Aido's eyes narrowed slightly.
'A bodyguard' Hanabusa thought, 'No, a watchdog.'
He felt somewhat angry knowing that someone, Kaname's personal 'bodyguard', was listening in on their conversation. Hadn't anyone heard of privacy? Not that it mattered. Hanabusa was annoyed with Kaname's mere presence.
He broke the contact, instantly feeling a long for warmth coming from it again (not that he would ever acknowledge it), and turned his head down, afraid to look the raven haired vampire in the eyes.
"You don't have to apologize." He said, wincing at how small and weak his voice sounded.
"I just hate you, that's all." He said, wishing the ache in his heart would go away. He felt guilt at saying such an immense lie and something more that he didn't know of. Not that he would ever think such a thing.
He turned and started to walk away.
'Even though he terrifies everyone, I still expect a lot from him,' Hanabusa thought, 'He cares for others.' He thought as he looked at the cracked marble that was still in the palm of his hand.
He stared at the light blue marble, the color oddly the same as his eyes, and thought about how he first got it. He rolled the marble between two fingers, looking at it with recognition and familiarity, as if it was a part of him.
There was an ache in his chest, one that never seemed to leave ever since he had first met the Kuran.
He still didn't understand it, it confused him, but he tried to pass it by.
He felt a sharp groove in the marble, a non-perfect line. He ran his finger over it, remembering when the marble had dropped from his hand and cracked.
He kept the marble for some odd, unknown reason that if he did know he wouldn't say. He felt oddly attached to the marble, something that was new to him since attachment never really seemed to be a problem.
He rested his jaw in his hand, occasionally glancing at the balcony which he was currently leaning against or the dark sky, dotted with light.
He didn't bother to go inside. He was already depressed. He couldn't imagine what Kaname had been going through. His parents had just died. He felt as if he wanted to see Kaname, to make sure that he was doing okay which he doubted he was.
He could hear the murmurs of pity for the young pureblood. Some were paying respect and others were trying to imagine what he was going through.
Then, suddenly, Kaname stopped in his tracks and looked straight at him. Aido's heart did that thing again, but it was mixed with sadness and worry at the other's expression. He looked so sad and…..lost. His chest contracted with sadness, wishing there was something that he could do to comfort the pureblood.
"Um…I…I just." He said, turning his head down, not sure what to say.
He could hear soft footfalls on the stone ground. But he couldn't bring himself to look up, to see that tormented expression on his face. It would shatter him.
But he did and it did.
"So you're old enough to attend the swarays now."
Aido didn't know what he expected to her from the recently orphaned pureblood, but it hadn't been that. He knew that maybe he didn't want to talk about his parent's death.
But he needed to say something.
"My deepest condolences. " Hanabusa said gently. He wanted to do so much more than offer simple respects. He wanted to comfort.
Those wine colored eyes still held the same sadness and grieving in them, but he could've sworn he saw his eyes lighten, just a smidge. Kaname gave the smallest smile, but still it was one.
"Thank you." He said, his tone matching the emotion in his eyes: still very much sad, grieving, lost, but somewhat lightened.
He walked slowly over to the balcony, right beside Hanabusa, and placed his elbows on it, looking out at the beautiful night sky.
"Yes, you had met my parents." He said, his eyes casting downward.
Aido felt another pang in his chest.
"Yes, I did. I'm so sorry. They seemed quiet affectionate."
"Hmm...Yes, they were." He stated thoughtfully.
Kaname turned gently to face the younger boy.
"If that is all, Hanabusa, goodbye." The pureblood stated before he started walking.
But that wasn't all. There was more he wanted to say. He just wanted to talk to the young pureblood in general, in hopes that it would help him with his tormented mood, to comfort him.
"Wait."
His footfalls stopped and he stood, patiently waiting for whatever it was that the younger wanted to say.
Aido's thoughts scrambled, trying to think of something to say-the right thing to say.
"I was just wondering, did something else happen?" It might've not been the right thing to say, but he couldn't help the curiosity that came over him.
For a short moment the only sounds were the murmurs of the people in the party, the wind whistling, making the trees tremble, and soft but audible breathing.
"And just why," he turned his head slightly back, to gaze over his shoulders at the younger aristocrat, 'do you ask?"
Curiosity clearly wasn't the best thing to show at that time and yet he voiced it. It was going to be the death of him.
"Um nothing, "he turned his head down, feeling slightly angry and guilty at himself for bringing up such a question at an inappropriate time, "No real reason."
"I expect an answer." He said, eyes narrowing, voice low and strong.
Aido trembled under his gaze wondering if he was ever this way before now.
"Um...You seem different now." He said observantly.
He wondered if Kaname was just trying to mask up his emotions.
The pureblood studied him for a second.
Kaname gave a soft, sad sigh before walking towards Hanabusa. He came to a stop right in front of him and bowed his head. His hand slipped over his shoulder.
"Oh, that was all."
Kaname's hands slipped around the younger's shoulders. His head rested on his neck, his breath warm against the sensitive there.
Aido could hear his heart slamming against his ribcage. That vulnerability, that ache in his chest expanded. The need to comfort the pureblood, desire to be close to him both physically and mentally was becoming potent, very evident.
"Thank you." He mumbled into the skin of his neck.
"Lord Kaname, if you don't mind, there are people here who would to offer you there sympathies." A man said gently leaning against the doorframe.
Kaname pulled gently away from the hug, his hands still on the younger's arms.
There was something in eyes, mixed in with all the grief and sadness. It was lightly coated every other emotion, but if Hanabusa would've guessed he would say that it was…..light?
He turned his head toward the elder.
"Of course, I will be right there, Ichijo." He said as he slipped his hands off of the Aido's arms and started toward the door.
'Sympathies?' Hanabusa thought.
His eyes looked into ballroom through the doorway and saw people in small crowds talking. One particular person stood out, a young beautiful girl with black silky hair, holding roses, looking straight at them or rather Lord Kaname and giggling.
For some reason that set him off. He felt anger bubbling in his stomach for a reason, emotion that he couldn't clarify, didn't want to.
"Lord Kaname, if you don't want to do something just say so. Just tell them." He blurted out before he could stop himself.
He longed for the warmth of the hug that he had experienced just a few moments ago. He was getting confused with himself and…conflicted.
"Tell me why do you care?" His voice was low and sadness rippled through his voice. His eyes were staring at him with curiosity.
That was a good question. Why did he care? He was supposed to be annoyed with him, just as he was when he first met him. He was supposed to hate him. But Kaname was so different, so kind and caring. How could he ever hate such a person?
He wasn't supposed to feel his heart slamming against his chest and his breath quicken whenever Kaname Kuran touched him nor was he supposed to feel an ache in his chest for him.
But he did.
"Because, "His fingers tightened around the light blue marble, feeling the crack in it and hoping for some strength," Because I'm your friend that's why."
Kaname's eyes tinged with hope and sadness at the same time.
"Really? Because I thought you told me, you hated me."
Panic and worry struck Aido's core. He had said that and he was supposed to be feeling it, but he didn't.
"I lied," He said rubbing his thumb over the crack in the marble and hoping to gain strength to say the things he needed to, "I hate myself for not being able to admit that I really like you. " He blurted out.
He instantly, covered his mouth with his arm once he realized what he said. Panic overtook him, was the last part really necessary?
The marble dropped from his hand and rolled across the ground, stopping at Kaname's feet. He was reminded of when that first happened and felt a sense of déjà vu overcome him.
Just like before, Kaname knelt down and picked the marble up. He looked at it with general curiosity, interest, remembrance, and joy.
A small smile adorned his face, bigger than the last and he walked over to Aido. Hanabusa's hand was already held up and Kaname's hovered above before dipping slightly and dropping the marble in his hand, not forgetting to brush his fingers against Hanabusa's palm.
He turned around and started toward the door.
"Lord Kaname, please I…I love you, Lord Kaname!" He blurted out, unable to help himself.
He really did it now. He just told Kaname that he loved him. Was that what it was, the aching feeling in his chest?
Kaname stopped dead in his tracks; his breathing was shallow and audible. He turned his head down for a moment, sucking in deep breaths before he lifted his head.
"Do you even know what love is?" His voice sounded hollow and sad.
"I..I….Um."
"Exactly." He said his voice sad and hollow before he walked without another word into the ballroom.
He sighed, running his fingers over the sharp crack in the marble.
He did know what love was and he wasn't lying when he said that he loved Kaname Kuran, it just took him awhile to figure it out.
Okay after rereading over the last part, I do that to make sure I kept the mistakes to a minimum because I don't have a beta, another idea popped into my head. I'm thinking about making a multi-chaptered sequel to this, but I'm not sure if I will. I might if people like this enough. Comment if you want!