Cowritten with Googlemouth.

This story happens concurrently with "Self Medication". We wanted to give you Maura's side of things, her point of view.

As usual (and always), the characters are not ours. We just borrowed them, but we promise to give them back (though Jane's outfit may actually fit better. Googs has a thing for making certain everything is altered to fit correctly. I don't know...) Your reviews are treasured and loved.

At first, she hadn't even realized that her feelings should be hurt. Maura never liked to assume anything, so she simply filled in the blanks with likelihoods rather than ascribe the behavior to any one thing. Jane could simply be tired out with her body's need to heal. She might be listening to her iPod and couldn't hear Maura knocking. Perhaps it had been a long day at physical therapy, and Jane just wanted quiet for a while. Maybe she was in the middle of a shower. She could even have a date over that Maura just couldn't see at the moment, and didn't want to be interrupted (that one started to occur to Maura only after Jane mentioned 'the Casey incident,' and persisted long after the point at which Jane's crankiness let Maura know that there was no way Jane was having actual sex, or she'd have been in a much better mood).

There were a dozen legitimate reasons why Jane might not answer the door or the phone. There were a dozen reasons why Jane's eyes might be bloodshot. There were dozens of reasons why Jane might socially withdraw to the point at which they only saw one another at crime scenes and autopsies, just as at the beginning of their friendship. There were a dozen reasons why she might not ask Maura over for movie nights or hanging out, why she might refuse Maura's invitations to exhibits, symphonies, dinners out, double dates, or any of the other excuses Maura made to spend time with her best friend.

But enough was enough. If Jane simply didn't want to be her friend anymore, Maura decided, she could at least have the decency to tell her to her face.

So Maura began calling or going by at different times of the evening, determined to get some response out of her.

After about a month of being ignored, Maura's freakish intelligence finally started to penetrate her own denial. Her best friend needed her and, for some reason, wasn't reaching out to her. Maura finally became willing to see the signs of alcohol use – by now, abuse – and once she considered it honestly, was ashamed that it had not occurred to her sooner.