This Is The Way…

…That I say I love you

Things hadn't been the same since Ultear had died. It was driving him crazy the way he kept thinking about her. Two years and the pain still hadn't faded. He hadn't been able to move on and it was affecting him in everything he did, especially his music. There was no soul or heart in his playing. He could play the piece perfectly and the notes would ring true but there was still something missing. There was a sense of lifelessness in his performance. It had been too much for him to take and he had quit and stepped out of the limelight, instead opting to devote his time to teaching at Fairy Tail Studios.

Jellal drained the rest of his coffee and stood up, tossing the cup into a trash can as he passed by. The sky was bluer than the ocean and the white clouds drifted by lazily, in no hurry to move along. He took a deep breath, savouring the fresh air, and a cool breeze ruffled his unruly blue hair fondly. Smiling slightly, the man ambled back towards the studio. It was a lovely day today. Maybe the wind would bring some brand new luck upon him.

When he stepped through the doors of the studio, a figure immediately pounced on him.

"There you are, Jellal! We need you now!" Laxus cried dramatically. "Natsu's taken ill today but he just called in and his student's on her way already!"

Jellal shoved the blonde away. "All right, all right. Breathe man. I'm free at the moment so I'll substitute for him."

"Awesome! Lesson should be in 10 minutes in room 4." Laxus beamed at him and glanced at his watch. He gave a yelp of surprise as he registered the time. "Gotta run! I'm late!"

Jellal rolled his eyes at his friend's antics and shook his head, bemusement flickering in his eyes. He made his way to his room to pick up his guitar. His eyes scanned over the two guitar cases lying side by side. One was a simple black case. The other was specially customized and was extra thick. Rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, Jellal knelt down and rubbed his hands over the customized case wistfully, the rough fabric smoothing under his touch. He hadn't touched this particular guitar since the accident that had claimed her life. Ultear had given it to him shortly before her death for his birthday and it was his most prized possession. Sighing, he stood up and grabbed the other case before exiting the room.

Turning the corner, he narrowly avoided a collision with a redhead. He raised a hand and mumbled an apology. She inclined her head and flashed him a pretty smile and Jellal couldn't help but smile back. As he turned to go, she called out to him.

"Excuse me."

Jellal raised his eyebrows and turned back towards her, looking at her questioningly.

"Do you know where room 4 is?" She asked.

He let out a small laugh. What were the odds?

"Is this your first lesson?"

She nodded and Jellal grinned, extending a hand in a handshake. She took it, clearly confused and Jellal said quickly. "I'm Jellal. I'll be your teacher for today since your teacher Natsu is ill."

She looked surprised. "I'm Erza, nice to meet you."

"Pleasure's mine," he waved a hand, "come on, the room's just around the corner."

He led the way, trying hard not to keep glancing at her. His heart was pounding furiously but he fought to keep his emotions under control. He just wasn't ready to move on yet.

Erza busied herself with the guitar equipment, plugging her guitar into the amp and adjusting the pickups. Jellal was already finished with his preparation and he took the time scrutinizing her.

She was beautiful. Her crimson hair fell down in waves over her shoulder and her onyx eyes were kind and glistened with happiness. She had a beautiful figure with curves in all the right places but what really attracted him was her passion. Although she hadn't started playing yet, he could see that she loved the instrument. The way she caressed the neck, the way her fingers flitted across the frets, the way she held it close to her. Jellal could feel his heart flutter slightly. It had been so long since someone had been so passionate about playing the guitar. It reminded him of happier times.

Jellal looked away with a forlorn expression on his face and Erza glanced at him briefly, sensing the sudden change of mood. He snapped out of his stupour quickly, feeling her gaze on him, and he took her guitar in his hands.

"So, anything specific you want to learn?" He asked.

He cast an appreciative eye over her white guitar. It was an Ibanez RG350DX, with a white body, a shiny pearl based pick guard and charcoal gray hardware. He fingered the neck and finger board.

"Maple neck and rosewood finger board," he murmured to himself, nodding with a satisfied smile on his face.

"Well, I want to learn how to play the blues," Erza replied.

His fingers tightened around the neck unconsciously and he bit his lip. The resemblance was uncanny. They were both similar in so many ways.

"The blues?" Jellal repeated uncertainly and Erza nodded determinedly.

"Do you teach the blues?" She asked him.

"I do," Jellal replied uneasily, "I just haven't played much of it for two years." His mouth went dry but he gave her a reassuring smile. "But it's not a problem, I love the blues."

Her eyes sparkled with delight and he felt his spirits lift ever so slightly. Maybe, just maybe he could get around this.

Jellal shouldered his Blacktop Strat HH Floyd Rose guitar, the silver chrome trembolo bar and exterior hardware glistening under the lights.

"Usually blues follow this 12 bar chord progression," Jellal explained, "and it uses a lot of string muting and the most important bit would be how you express yourself through the music."

His fingers danced on the strings as he explained and he stopped for a second. "You can play the guitar, right?"

Erza grinned with excitement. "I can. I know all the techniques really but I don't really know how to express myself through the blues genre, that's all."

Jellal cracked a smile at her enthusiasm. She was amazing. "Here, let's just try this little piece, shall we?"

She was a brilliant guitarist. She had gotten the piece down after a few tries and Jellal could see that she had all the techniques. Now all she had to work on was the way she played the song.

"Hold on," Jellal interrupted her. She paused and stared at him. "You're doing great, your technique is perfect but," he gestured in her direction, "you're playing the piece too…well how should I say this?" He scratched his head. "You need to feel the meaning behind the song. You have to mean what it's saying. There's some soul behind it. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Erza looked at him uncertainly and shook her head. Jellal smiled.

"Here, why don't you play the song once more first?"

She complied with his request. After she had finished, he played it once himself.

"Can you hear the difference?"

Erza gave a small laugh and Jellal chuckled. "Try it again," he said.

And this time, he corrected her and gave her tips as she played while he accompanied her with an improvised solo.

"Bend the string just a tad bit more, release it gently. You can feel the bits where you should strike down harder, can't you?"

To say that she was impressed would be an understatement. Although she had only known him for such a short while, Erza really admired Jellal. He was not only amazing with the guitar but he clearly loved playing it more than life. She smiled to herself as he moved closer, trying to feel the music even more. It was a wonderful feeling playing music with someone equally passionate about it as she was. Still, she couldn't shake off the feeling that there was a certain restlessness and sadness in his style of playing. The tone was sorrowful, almost as if he were mourning someone, and his eyes seemed to stare into the distance, reminiscing years ago.

He finished the song with a little trill and slap on the strings and found her staring at him thoughtfully. Jellal looked away, his heart sinking. The lesson was over now but that little session had brought back memories of happier times and his heart ached for her now. He had felt the difference. He had, for the first time in two years, played with his heart and soul. It was not perfect, but he had regained some of his passion and he craved more. Maybe his heart was finally healing after all this time.

"Jellal."

Jellal looked up at the sound of her voice.

"Sorry, that's the end of our lesson." He said, trying to regain his composure. "You did well today. Just work on the feeling behind the piece and you'll be a lot better. I'm not sure what Natsu will be doing with you next lesson but you can show him today's piece if you want."

"About that," she replied, "I was hoping that you would be able to remain as my teacher."

Jellal nearly dropped his guitar in surprise and he stammered out a response, "Yeah, yeah of course. That'd be great. I'll speak to Natsu about it."

Maybe his luck really was changing.

They picked up where they left off last week and over the next few lessons, they went through different pieces and he taught her to add in little bits of improvisation to make the piece sound more personal. They added in a few extra chord progressions and notes as they sought to express themselves. After Erza had run through the improved piece a few times, Jellal stopped her suddenly.

"Ok," he said, excitement welling up in his chest. "How do you feel?"

"I…"

"Don't tell me," he interrupted her. "Show me. Show me through your music. Express your feelings through it. Play me the whole piece all the way through."

Erza nodded slowly and started playing. Jellal stared at her as she played. He could hear the passion behind it and he could feel himself tremble with anticipation. The piece started slowly, almost wistfully, before its pace quickened and delved into the climax. He could hear the longing and affection underlying the notes and he let out a breath that he didn't know he had been holding as Erza finished.

Jellal gestured with his hands as he tried to express himself through words and grinned broadly.

"Perfect," he breathed out. "That was incredible."

She smiled. "Why don't you show me how you feel?"

Jellal laughed. "Let me just go get something." He returned swiftly with another guitar case and he unzipped it, taking out a Black 1 Fender Stratocaster. It had a white pick guard and gold hardware and trembolo bar. The neck was made from the finest maple and the fretboard was made from rosewood. His fingers trembled slightly as he stroked the guitar body lovingly.

"This was given to me by a very dear…friend of mine," he murmured sadly. "I haven't touched it for 2 years."

Erza nodded sympathetically but she did not question him and Jellal shook his head, his fingers ghosting between the strings. Slowly, he began to play and Erza's eyes widened in surprise. It was the first time she had heard him play a whole song and his playing was very different from the first time he had played her a small extract during their first lesson. It was more passionate and for once, Jellal seemed happy. He caressed the guitar with the utmost care as he strummed and slapped on the strings and his eyes softened as he gazed at it tenderly.

Erza tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear shyly and her eyes locked with his as he looked up at the end of the piece. And at that moment, she knew that he felt exactly the same way as she did.

5/8 of today's update! For a longer explanation, go read the author's note in chapter 17 of Retribution

Next chapter: Natsu X Lucy

Note: Does anyone get the song for the story and chapter titles? It's from Learning To Breathe by Switchfoot