Hey everyone! This itsy bitsy story had been eating at my brain for an entire day. Whatever I did, I couldn't shake it off, it was calling for me to write it, pulling at my hand and urging me to sit at the computer and type type type. So I did.

For those of you who have me on alert and were hoping for a Songs of Our Life update, I'm sorry. It's coming! I just had to get this out of my system. As always for me, this story started out from a song on repeat and repeat and repeat. This time it was "Need You Now" from Lady Antebellum. I heard it somewhere and it just stuck with me. So play that if you want.

Big thanks to Anne (Northwomn) for betaing this for me. I love you, hon!

UPDATE: Due to a gazillion million (yeah, not that many, but still...) reviews and people that asked me to continue this story, I am announcing that I will write new chapters soon. The story line is still in the works for now, so it might take me a while to get to it, but I will continue it, nonetheless. In the meanting, check out my other vampire-Sookie story - Eternal Night, or my all-human one Songs of Our Life.

xoxo

Gaby

SPOV

I was a little tipsy tonight. Not drunk, just tipsy. I was all alone on New Year's Eve, so who wouldn't drink a bit, right? The workday hadn't been any easier, considering I knew I would be on my own tonight and seeing how everyone else had plans. I was wearing a t-shirt and a pair of boyshorts, prancing around the living room with a glass of red wine, swaying to some song on the radio.

I knew I could use some sleep after the day I'd had, but I also didn't want to go to bed. The image of Eric haunted me from the fireplace mantle and I felt the need to turn my back to the photographs. Such beautiful memories.

Eric and I had broken up three months ago. Well, rather, I broke up with him. I couldn't bear it anymore, all these supernatural troubles coming undone in my front yard. Or back yard. Whichever. I just wanted space. I couldn't have fairies and vampires dying on my grass anymore. I couldn't have Were blood on my hands anymore. I just didn't want to deal with any of it anymore. I wanted to be away from it all, so I ran. I made the decision that broke my heart and Eric's. It was for my own safety, I thought.

Closing the bond had been the hardest thing to do, especially since Eric's feelings had become such an integrated part of me. I knew we'd forever be bound like this, but I also knew we needed to be apart if I wanted to ever grow old. I sure didn't want to die at my age and with my streak of luck and habit, it seemed more and more likely I wouldn't be able to dodge the bullet forever. Since the past three months had been so quiet, I knew that it was working and the supes were either forgetting about me or avoiding me, or lurking for an opportunity.

So here I was, heartbroken, alone and completely unhappy. What the hell was I doing? I caught my reflection in the dark windows and I was not surprised to see my shoulders slumped forward. That's how I've been carrying myself lately. Even the tips were lousy when I wasn't smiling.

What the hell was I doing? I was staying away from the only person I loved so I'd get to live as a human and grow old. For whom? I thought I had been doing it for myself, but it seemed now, alone in my living room on New Year's Eve, that I had taken the decision for fear of what other's thought.

Everyone thought badly of Eric, but I knew better, right? Sure, he could be a conniving, manipulative, high-handed scary motherfucker, but he could also be gentle, generous and loving when he was with me. I missed him so much, especially since tonight would have been our anniversary of sorts. I couldn't keep my mind away from him. Everything reminded me of him. The red coat in the coat rack by the door, the old, fugly afghan on the arm of the sofa… even my own hair color made me think of him. He tried, he truly did try, to make me change my mind, but I'm too stubborn for my own good sometimes. I felt like slapping myself over the head. I knew Gran would have done it.

I wanted to crawl up the couch and cry myself to sleep, hoping I'd wake up from this nightmare I wove for myself; I wanted him to come running, swoop in and hold me in his arms; I wanted to go to him. All these urges at once were confusing me.

I slumped on the couch and watched the fire dance as I spun the blood-red wine in the glass, tears trickling down my cheeks.

I knew that if I stayed here, I'd probably be safe from the supernatural world and whoever wanted to use me next, for a while, but I wasn't stupid enough to really, really believe I was safe forever. They always came back. Always.

I knew Eric wouldn't come running to me now, not after the way I broke his heart. And it didn't help that I took back his invitation. He had trusted me… the first person in a millennium he trusted with his heart and I went and stomped all over it. And for what? To stay with my friends and family here, in Backwater, Louisiana. I had refused to move in with him so I could stay here, in this musty, rattling house by myself, refused his gifts so other people wouldn't think poorly of me, refused his job offer so Sam wouldn't consider me a whore and I rejected him when all he ever wanted was to care for me. Me, a telepathic barmaid in a place you had to use a magnifier to find on a map.

I wanted to go after him, find him, make him mine again, but I didn't think he'd take me back. There I was, talking like a vampire. "Mine". One little word that got me all ruffled up whenever he had used it, somehow refusing to see what an honor it was to be his. It wasn't just that I was his, he belonged to me also, but I never saw it like that. I guess I never really believed he could love me.

Also, I knew if I did go after him, it couldn't be like it has been until now… I had to give myself completely. I had to move in with him, accept his job offer and, most importantly, really let him love me. I had to forget anyone but him. He had done that for me time and time again, and he was seen as weak by other vampires because of his feelings for me, but he didn't care.

Was I ready to do that? Or could I just stay here, away from it all. Why did I always have to have the last word in everything? Relationships should be about giving and taking. Both ways. I saw now, he had always been the one to give. I had done all the taking, never giving anything back. I never even actually told the man I loved him, for God's sake. I needed him so much.

The fact that no one had invited me to a New Year party told me a lot about the people I was sacrificing my love for. The fact I was alone tonight told me even more. There had only been one invitation in my mail box and that was with the Fangtasia logo all over it. I thought it was from Pam. Eric couldn't have sent it after the way I acted with him. Could he?

Goddamnit! I was miserable without him. Was I ready to give myself to him completely? Would he even take me back?

I glanced at the clock and I saw it was a little after one o'clock. I wasn't even tipsy anymore as my glass had gone forgotten during my mental drabble. I wanted to get ready and leave the house, drive to Fangtasia and jump him; give myself completely to him. This was no way of living – unhappy, sorrowful, unloved. I wanted more. I wanted to do what was right for my heart.

For the first time in all these months I did something I had vowed to never do again. I opened the bond and felt for Eric.

He was just as miserable as I was, it seemed. Bored. His mind perked up all of a sudden. He felt me. I knew it. He must have sensed my sorrow, because his side of the bond enveloped mine. Caressed it. It seemed like he was giving me a hug, the hug I had been longing for.

Without another thought, I got up and went to my bedroom, picking out a dress. I went to the bathroom and fixed my hair and put on a little make up. I was freshly waxed all over, so at least I didn't have to bother with that tonight. I felt like I was in a trance as I got dressed and ready to go. I was only now realizing how much I had missed Eric's presence in my mind.

The dress I picked was a one-shoulder, silk, burgundy, flowy gown. There was a big brooch on the shoulder and a black sash over my waist. I pulled out a pair of black pumps that Pam had gifted me with last year and I never got to wear. I switched my cellphone and keys to the matching clutch, got something from the back of my dresser and headed for the door. I remembered to put out the fire and get the invitation from the kitchen table before getting back to the door, picking out my burgundy coat and heading out.

I realized I had a smile on my face as I took in the fresh air of the night. I felt free. Liberated. I had made my decision and as far as I felt, Eric had only encouraged me to go meet him. I was done trying to keep my feelings in check.

I got in my car and drove to Shreveport. I gnawed on my lip and thought about what I was about to say to Eric. The road was clear and I soon found myself in front of Fangtasia. I knew he was inside. I felt him. There was a mixture of boredom and excitement, warmth and longing coming from him. I took a deep breath and got out of the car, careful not to dirty my gown.

I walked pass the fangbangers waiting to get in, even tonight. At least they were dressed a tad more formal than usual. Pam was manning the door and she smirked when she saw me.

"Oh, thank fuck you're here. He's inside," she told me and I smiled at her.

"I missed you too, Pam," I told her and she winked at me. I knew she couldn't say anything in front of so many fangbangers, but she squeezed my arm as I passed her and I knew she had missed me too.

He perked up in his high chair when he sensed me in the bar. The dance floor was packed with vampires and humans, moving in the dim light. He rose to his impressive height and his eyes searched for me through the crowd. I opened up my coat as I made my way to him, the air stale with sweat, blood and cigarette smoke. I felt hot all over and I had no idea if it was because of the temperature in the bar or Eric's presence.

A small smirk played at his lips as he approached me and we met halfway on the dance floor. He offered me his hand and I took it and he pulled me close as we started dancing. It was the same song I had been swaying to at home.

His arms came around me and I let out a small sigh. I was home again. We hadn't gotten to talking yet, but even if he would reject me I'd at least have this to remember on my lonely nights. As soon as the dance was over he looked into my eyes and motioned for the offices with his head, a question in his eyes. I nodded and he dragged me onto the corridor. Instead of walking into his office I tugged on his head hand and motioned for the back door leading into the parking lot.

He smiled and followed me to his car instead. He opened my door and helped me settle in before zooming to his side. He put the car in drive and headed for the main road. We stole glances at one another, each probing the bond for the other's feelings. We had yet to speak when he was almost to the road leading to Bon Temps.

"Where to?" he asked.

"Home," I answered softly to him.

He made a move to pull to the right, but I put my hand over his.

"Home, Eric," I repeated and realization dawned on him. He smiled at me and continued driving to his house in the outskirts of Shreveport.

He held onto my hand until he parked in his driveway. He came around and swooped me up, bridal style and he carried me to the door. He opened it and crossed me the threshold as I got myself lost in the way he smelled, my face close to his neck. He closed the door with his foot and carried me to the den where he settled me on the couch. I shrugged off my coat and put it on the back of the couch before my eyes found his again.

He sat on the floor, next to the sofa and kept looking at me, his thumb running circles over the back of my hand. Eric opened his mouth to speak, but I put a finger on his lips to shush him.

"I need to talk and I need you to listen, ok? I need to get this out.

"First of all, I'm sorry, Eric. I'm terribly, terribly sorry for everything I've said and everything I've done. It's been very childish and stupid of me. I shouldn't have thrown you out, I shouldn't have asked you to never think of me again, I never should have done what I did. I thought I was doing the right thing, but the only thing I managed to actually do was break both our hearts.

"I love you. I love you so much it hurts to breathe when you're not around. I love you so much it hurts to even think of you. I love you so much that I can't even look at a picture of you, of us, without wanting to burst into tears. I miss you and I need you. I've nearly called you so many times, I was just so stubborn. I'm done running. I want to be yours again and I want you to be mine. I'm finally ready to give myself to you completely. If you'll have me, that is…" I poured my heart out.

He had been quiet through my entire declaration, rubbing my hand softly. He was smiling now and his hands lifted to my face slowly. He leaned in and his lips brushed mine lightly, before pressing more fully. I let out a happy sigh, content to feel his lips once more, content with having him so close to me again. I wanted to feel all of him, but he pulled away.

"Your apologies are accepted, Sookie. I have been waiting for you and I'd have waited for you forever if that's how long it took you to realize your feelings. I've spent a thousand years without you and yet, these past few months have seemed the longest in my existence. I love you too, dear one, and I'm happy to know you feel the same. Of course I'll have you. You're all I ever want," he told me and I thought I wasn't hearing right. He had really forgiven me. I knew there was a big smile on my face cause his smile was just as big.

"I meant what I said. I'm done running. I'm getting my stuff tomorrow if you'll make room for some clothes of mine. I'll quit my job at Merlottes cause I know now you didn't want me to do it because you hated Sam, but because you wanted us to have more time together. If I work at Fangtasia we'll have just that. I love you, oh how I love you," I told him, like I couldn't repeat it enough times to make up for the lost time.

I reached into my purse and brought out the little tissue that kept the bullet he'd taken for me in Texas. I handed it to him and his eyes widened. His nostrils flared as he took his own scent over the metal.

"Even then, I knew I should be yours. I kept that because I knew I'd need reminders when times got rough. You sacrificed so much for me, you've given yourself to me and now I'm returning the gesture," I told him.

"I did not know you had kept this. Oh, Sookie. I don't know what to say. I'd say I'm sorry I tricked you into taking my blood that night, but I can't," he said.

"I'm not either," I interrupted. He really did not need to say any more.

"I missed you, Lover," he said before leaning forward and kissing me again.

My arms linked around his neck, praying he didn't pull away again. He didn't, but he scooped me up and took the stairs to his… our, bedroom. Our kisses grew in passion and his hands started traveling my body frantically when he put me on my feet at the end of the bed.

He untied my sash as I started unbuttoning his black shirt. His hands found the brooch on my shoulder and opened it and the dress fell to my feet. He broke the kiss and took a step back, taking in my lingerie. I had a strapless push up bra on that made my boobs look even bigger than they were and a small thong that matched the bra. I had on black thigh-high stockings that made him lick his lips.

My hands went to his shoulders and I helped him shrug off the shirt he had on, before fumbling with his belt and zipper, dropping his pants. He had gone commando again and my breath hitched as I saw how hard he was for me. He walked me back until my knees hit the bed and I fell onto the soft mattress with him over me.

"That dress is wonderful, by the way," he told me as he licked my neck.

My back arched off the sheets and our chests came in contact. I felt like I was wearing too many clothes.

"I was thinking of you when I bought it," I told him honestly.

"I know. I can tell," he said and he lifted off of me and his hands trailed my chest, joining between my breasts and ripping off my bra.

I was about to protest, but his lips closed around my nipple and I forgot anything I wanted to say.

"I've missed you so much, Lover," he said and I moaned as one of his fangs nicked my breast.

"Eric," I breathed out. I wanted nothing more, but to be his tonight and forever. Forever. I breathed out the last word and he growled into my skin.

"Yes. I would keep you forever if you will let me," he said and started traveling down my body as his hands caressed each surface he found.

"Forever," I moaned again as his hand swiped over the front of my panties.

He stopped altogether and I opened my eyes, finding him looking at me with a question in his gaze.

"Mine or yours, Lover? I need to know," he pressed, his voice so deep it made me shiver.

"Yours. I want it to be mine as well. Ours," I told him, caressing his cheek.

I had decided I was done running. I had decided I was all in and I knew this was the most important decision I needed to make. None of those who I was trying to preserve my humanity for were close to me anymore and those that truly loved me would still be there for me after the change. Sure, I could remain human and be with Eric, but why make him suffer through me getting old and dying? So many vampires had been driven to insanity when their bonded died… I did not want that for Eric. Plus, it was a safety advantage as well, since I'd be able to better protect myself if someone came for me. That is, if I would keep my telepathy through the change. But 99% of my decision, centered on Eric. I wanted him, needed him, forever. Our time apart had taught me I really couldn't have enough of him. It had been hell and I never wanted to feel that way again.

"Lover, don't joke," he said, his side of the bond sending contradicting vibes. He felt exalted and thrilled and happy, but he was also trying to restrain himself, it seemed.

"I would not joke, Eric. Not about this. I want to be yours in every way. Your lover, your bonded, your pledged, your childe…"

His lips crashed on mine and the passion and love he was sending me had me dizzy. His thumbs found the sides of my panties and he snapped the elastic, leaving me bare. He drew circles around my clit and he had me moaning his name in between kisses in no time. He plunged a finger in, fucking me slowly, and then added another and another, preparing me for his size.

"Eric, please, don't tease," I begged, not even caring at this moment.

He settled between my legs and plunged in before I could say anything else. A deep moan escaped my throat and my eyes rolled in the back of my head. He went slowly at first, reacquainting ourselves with each other, but it was like riding a bicycle. It seemed that no time had passed. He picked up speed and fucked me as his hands kept reaching for any piece of skin he could reach. His lips were on mine, on my neck, on my chest and shoulders, on my nipples and in the valley between my breasts.

I felt my orgasm closing in and my nails dug into his shoulders.

"Do it now, Eric. Jag älskar dig," I moaned out and he growled into my neck. He bit down and I came, constricting around him, pulling him with me into bliss. He drank deeply and kept on pulling from the wound until I was barely conscious. I felt something wet against my lips and instinctively opened them, letting Eric's blood pool down my throat.

"Come back to me. I need you, Lover," he whispered, before darkness took me.

Leave me some reviews and tell me what you think of it. Pretty please with a Viking on top!

xoxo

Gaby