"I'm sorry." Jim whispered, desperate to break the tense silence that had engulfed his room since his first officer had entered unannounced and sat meaningfully on his bed next to him.

Spock said nothing in return and waited patiently for Jim to continue.

The blonde ran a hand though his hair in poorly concealed aggravation, both at Spock's silence and at himself, before speaking again.

"I'm sorry I kissed you. I'm sorry I ran away and didn't explain myself. I'm sorry if I messed up whatever tentatively fragile friendship we were starting and affected your relationship with Uhura in any way…Please just know that I'm really sorry."

Jim felt his eyes water for the first time since his brother ran away and he internally cursed his own weakness.

"I don't love you." He clarified, not wanting to give Spock the wrong impression.

But before his first officer could answer Jim grabbed his wrist and turned to face him instead of the wall.

"But only because I know that if I do we'll both get hurt. I saw it in Prime's head. How he loved his Jim with all his soul and his Jim loved him back. But Prime denied his feelings and his Jim denied his and they ended up never getting together. They had a great friendship and I want that for us, I don't want to ruin everything. Can we forget this ever happened? Just forget I ever said anything. Things don't have to change between for us-"

Spock pulled his wrist free of Jim's grasp and pulled the shorter man over to him in the same flash of movement.

"May the mistakes of our elders not be our own. I cannot forget. I refuse to forget. I will not accept that the shadows of what could be are set in stone. Our future is our own. I am thankful for your honesty and appreciate your consideration, but I welcome this change. I have denied what I feel for you and might have always done so if not for your kiss."

Spock pulled back just enough to meet Jim's gaze and the fire in his eyes burned brighter than he'd ever seen before.

"I do not love you. But I know that I will. I feel it more and more each day. When your gaze meets mine my heart beats at a higher rate than normal. When you say my name I force myself not to flush. With every chess match and mission the feeling grows stronger. I cannot conceive a world without you at my side. Whatever happens from here I will accept."

Spock reached out to place his hand on Jim's cheek and the lukewarm feel of Spock's touch sent shivers down his spine.

"If you ask it of me I will walk out of this room and never mention this again. I will be your friend till the end of my days with a smile on my face. I will never mention our kiss, our talk or our embrace. If you can make me believe that you honestly want to be nothing more than we are now, I will accept it. But I will never forget this night. I will treasure it always as something incredible precious but was not meant to be. Is that what you truly want?"

Jim closed his eyes and leaned into Spock's touch. Unable to articulate his thoughts.

"Would you let me stay Jim? Would you let me love you as it should have been in Prime's universe? Will you let yourself love me?"

Jim made a whimpering noise at the back of his throat and allowed his eyes to open, stunning Spock with their vibrancy all over again.

"What if we aren't right for each other? What if this mess us up?" I don't want to loose you."

Spock smiled his barely seeable smile and brought his face only a breath away from Jim's face.

"You never could."

Then they were kissing like they had done so a million times before and nothing was more natural. Their hands threaded together without a thought and squeezed tightly.

There was no running away, no apologies and definitely no regrets.

Their future wasn't set in stone.

I did this in like 15 minutes. I had no idea where I was going with this but I had a really strong urge to write a Spirk oneshot. I really should be doing my homework. Reviews would make me feel better about ignoring my school work.

Yours truly,

Jessica499499