Ryuk hovered precariously close to the edge of the Human Realm since 2003 (I'm using the manga timeline). Since the last Kira was killed life had gotten a little boring for the rebel Shinigami.

"Oh, no you don't" said Sidoh. "Do we really need another Kira on our hands?"

But Ryuk never paid attention to that whiner. "Whoopsie" he remarked as the black book fell to Earth.

"That was your third Death note! No way are you getting another one!"

"Oh, shut up ugly".

Ryuk hovered to Earth to see where his notebook had landed

SPLAT!

A frozen rush of purple hit Kurt square in the face. It was his fourth slushy of the week from the same two thugs.

"O guuurl, purple is SO not your color!" The black one laughed. "You think he'd look better in orange?"

Karofsky pulled up his cup with every intent on giving Kurt a dose of his closeted affection but-

"Dammit, it's empty. I used it on the cripple earlier. Let's go, Azimio. Mustn't keep a lady waiting"

The two imbeciles ran off snickering.

"Idiots" Kurt said to himself as he walked to the bathroom to clean himself off.

Kurt was in the girls bathroom. It was after school, and New Directions and all the other clubs wouldn't start until tomorrow so it was pretty deserted. The school expected him to go in there anyway. After all, they elected him prom queen.

Kurt stood there and studied his face in the mirror. He wasn't very threatening looking, and the makeup was doing nothing for his masculinity. He sighed.

"Good, it still fits."

The young man almost jumped out of his skin. Who would be in there?

Brittany came out wearing her Cheerios uniform.

"Mr. Tibbles put my uniform in the dryer when he knows he's supposed to dry clean it. But he got his license revoked from having catnip in the car."

Kurt laughed for the first time since school started. "Cats, what can you do?"

thud

Kurt and Brittany jumped.

"Kurt, what was that?"

"It looked like a notebook fell from one of the classrooms upstairs. Let's go get it back."

The duo walked outside to see the notebook. It was black, leather-bound, and had the word "Death Note" written on the front cover.

"We should give that back to Kira." Stated Brittany.

Kurt almost laughed. He never believed in Kira to begin with. Kurt always thought that it was just some big media stunt and all the criminals were safely locked away in the alps or something. Besides, he'd seen fake Death Notes all over. Even Blaine had one. He picked up the notebook and screamed.

"Hello there, human. Wouldn't happen to have any apples on you, now would you?"

This figure was talking to him was simply unreal! It had a zombie head sewn onto the strangest body Kurt had ever seen.

"Aw, c'mon. Light wasn't afraid of me. These Americans are weird."

"Kurt, what's wrong?" Brittany panicked. Kurt was white as a sheet.

It was a good thing Brittany was dumb. "I uh...I cut myself on a blade of grass. Can you go get me a band-aid?"

"Oh sure, I keep them in my bra just in case. Do you want Spongebob or Barbie?"

"Uh...It looks pretty bad. Can you get me one of those giant ones from the nurse's office?"

"Ok, but I won't be back for a while."

Brittany headed off and Kurt took the opportunity to run off. He had the Death Note now. He was the new Kira...

SO THIS WAS CHAPTER ONE OF MY EPIC CROSSOVER. LEMON NOT GUARENTEED, BUT PLOT IS. PLEASE RATE AND REVIEW AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER. Mkay?