AN: I'm still alive, I promise! I'm really sorry about pausing on this story for such a looooooong time! I've had major writers block, but thank you for those who sent me wonderful messages and reviews! As I should explain again, this story still has a few chapters to go, so I hope you enjoy this one! :D

I screamed in pain and clutched my growing stomach. Abbey ran into the room with a moist towel at hand and wrapped her long arms around my shoulders.

"Shh, hold still," She murmured and wet my forehead with the refreshing towel.

I closed my eyes and panted a few times before looking back at her worried face.

"Bad dream?" She asked in a whisper. I pressed my lips together and nodded. She hugged me tightly and patted my wet hair, "It's going to be okay, shhh,"

It was the first form of contact we've had all week. Her holding me; soothing me. It felt nice. I missed it. I clutched onto her like a last dying breath. Ever since I've had the notion of her cheating on me, I've been having terrible dreams. Dreams about the baby coming too early, too late, coming out retarded, without limbs, or with no face. The pain was so real that I felt it pulsate through me like you would've felt if a family member had died. But the comfort and smell of cigarettes calmed my nerves.

"I'm sorry," She whispered, "For whatever I did, I'm sorry."

I sighed and pulled her away from me. I examined her worried and scared expression and bit my lip. She was crying. I shook my head and dried her tears.

"You did nothing,"

"Then why are you sleeping out here? I didn't bother asking before because I thought you needed your space, but it seems like you need me as much as I need you," She said quietly and put her hands over her face.

"I thought..." I paused and took a deep breath, "Are you cheating on me?"

She quickly looked up with fear-stricken eyes.

"Like hell I would! Why would you ever think that, Santana?" She shrieked and got up from the couch.

I watched her pace for a few minutes and then kick a wall. I cringed when she cried again. I didn't know if she was being sincere or just fucking with me. I didn't know if I could trust her. I know what I heard. I heard the moans and pleasure of her with another person. I heard it. Didn't I?

"What made you think that?" She asked, looking at me, her dark eyes now rimmed in red.

I sighed and didn't make the effort to get up, "I heard heavy breathing on the phone that one night I called when you were running late... and you told me that you had a longer shift... was that Drake Larky?"

Abbey froze, "W-what?"

"Drake Larky. That guy who sent you the letter?" I asked. She didn't say anything, but she tried. I shook my head and laughed, "Who the fuck is Drake Larky? Your boyfriend?"

"He's my brother!" She screamed. I stopped talking immediately. She's never screamed at me before, "He's my fucking brother! When my parents split, my mom took me and my dad took him. He lives in fucking Germany now and I never get to fucking see him! And I did have a longer fucking shift and that was my boss! He has a fucking problem with his lungs! I would never lie to you Santana..." She started to cry, "I'm loyal to you, but if you can't trust me, then you can just leave,"

I couldn't speak. My mind was doing loops. My stomach was turning and I felt sick.

"Y-you..."

"Leave... Go ahead," Her voice broke and she walked over to the door and opened it. I looked into her eyes and my jaw tightened. "Get the fuck out!" She screamed and stomped her foot. I jumped a little but then nodded and forced my legs to move.

I walked out the door and turned around to see she had fallen to the ground. I sighed and wiped my tears onto my sleeve and left with my car.

Of course the only place now was at Kurt's. I couldn't have just kept my mouth shut? What's wrong with me? This always happens to me... why me? Out of everyone in the whole entire world. Out of all the Hispanic, lesbian, child-baring girls in the world and it had to be me. If I wasn't such a suspicious, sneaky loud-mouth maybe none of this would've happened. I wouldn't be pregnant with a gay man's child. I wouldn't be homeless. I wouldn't have any of these problems.

I pulled into Kurt's driveway and shut the engine off. I wrapped my arms around the steering wheel and broke down in a gasping cry. I didn't know if it was from the pain of the baby or the pain of my shattered heart. I needed Kurt. I needed someone.

I heard the front door open and then close. I quickly looked up and rubbed my eyes until the blurry vision was wiped away. Finn. I didn't want to talk to Finn. Where was Kurt?

"Hey, it's 3 in the morning," Finn yawned, "Your headlights sort of blinded me. I was in the middle of a game of COD with Puck..." Finn looked off into the distance with a wondering gaze, "You're here to see Kurt, right?"

I nodded, "Where is he,"

"He's sleeping... but come in, you can sleep on the couch," He said, turning and walking away.

What a strange guy. He didn't even ask why I was here. I shrugged and followed him in. The Hummel-Hudsen residence seemed kind of creepy at night, it being so quiet and all. Finn showed me to the couch and tossed a couple more pillows and a blanket from the other couches onto it.

"Umm," He looked around for anything else, "Bathroom is down the hall," He smiled and left.

I blinked reassuringly and propped myself up on one elbow as I lay down on the couch. I flicked on the TV and put the volume very low. I didn't really watch it to understand what was going on but it was Family Guy and that show usually made me happy. If Finn was one hundred percent awake, he would've got Kurt immediately to solve why I was here and what my intentions were. But he didn't. I respected that, but I really needed to see him.

And just like God willed it, I heard creaking stairs from down the hall. I quickly shut the TV off and waited patiently for Finn to come back and realize what he's done. But it wasn't Finn...

"Kurt, thank God," I whispered and my eyes filled with tears again.

He didn't look happy at all. He actually looked completely pissed so I stopped from getting up to hug him. I stared at him wondering what was going on.

"W-what's wrong?" I asked.

"Why are you here?" He asked, folding his arms across his chest.

I looked more closely at his eyes in the dark. They were glossy. Bags were formed under his eyes as well. He's been crying? And by the looks of it, it has been going on for a very long time.

"Kurt I... I need to talk to you,"

"I need to talk to you too, Santana," He said back, but the way he said it bit. Hard.

"You go first," I said and sat back down on the couch.

"Well 3 days ago I went on a date with Blaine and we were having sex and I screamed out your name, so he broke up with me because clearly he doesn't know how much I love and care about him now that I made you pregnant. I'm not going to deny impregnating you, Santana. This whole situation is ruining my life and everywhere I go people just stare at me. You know my friends at school don't talk to me anymore?" He said in a high-pitched voice and started to sob, "It's because I'm so fucked in the head about all this bullshit! I can't take it anymore, Santana!" He yelled and broke down, ugly sobbing.

I stared at him wide-eyed and then saw the living room light flick on. I turned around and saw Burt. His arms were crossed and a disappointed scowl was on his face. He heard.

"Is this true?" He said calmly.

Kurt quickly looked up and tried to wipe away his tears, "D-dad, I-"

"Is this true, Kurt? Did you get a girl pregnant?" He asked a little louder.

"What's with all the yelling?" Carol yawned and walked up to Burt. She went to put a hand on his shoulder but then paused when she saw the scene, "Hello Santana," She gave me a warm smile.

"Yes, dad, okay? I'm a big fuck-up!" Kurt screamed and started to sob again, covering his face with his hands.

Finn came in the room with his headset on, his mouth a big O shape as he looked at everyone's faces. I glared at him.

"What's going on?" Finn said, giving Burt a sideways glance.

"Kurt got Santana here pregnant," Burt sighed and rubbed his temples, closing his eyes.

Finn quickly looked at me with a surprised expression. Carol helped Burt to sit on the couch after he tore the pillows and blankets away. Kurt slowly took his hands away from his face and when Finn patted his shoulder.

"Is that what's going on?" Finn asked.

Kurt nodded but didn't open his eyes. Finn looked back at me and then down at my stomach.

"Wow,"

"Shut it," I snapped, trying to sound fierce but instead sounded as weak a toothpick. I turned to Burt and Carol, "I am so sorry, you don't understand how sorry I am,"

"You knew my son was gay," Burt looked up at me with an angry look, "You knew he was gay and yet you... you pressured him into doing this?"

I closed my eyes. Burt's words stung like ice. I opened my mouth to say something but Kurt interrupted me.

"Don't yell at her, dad!" Kurt snapped, his voice breaking, "It was me. I wanted to do it! If anything I forced her to have sex with me!" He yelled.

The whole room was silent. Especially me. I was the one whomade Kurt do it, not the other way around. I knew that for a fact. I looked around and everyone was staring at Kurt in horror.

"Kurt..." Carol began.

"I told you everything, Carol," He shot a look at her, "I told you what was going on, I told you everything. Me and Blaine had a fight and I was feeling distressed... Santana was the only one who was there for me. You all saw that I couldn't eat or sleep and that I would cry for hours on end but none of you thought to maybe talk to me about my problems? Not even you, Burt? My own father!" He laughed humourlessly, "You knew I was having problems with Blaine but you never thought to ask me about it,"

"Kurt, please, can we talk about this some other time?" Burt asked.

"I want to talk about it now!" Kurt screamed.

I was taken aback quite a bit at this new Kurt. So different from the prissy Kurt or the sexy Kurt. This was Hulk-smash Kurt. It was downright terrifying. When he said he was having problems with Blaine though... was that the only reason why he had sex with me? To get back at Blaine? It hurt me. So he didn't love me at all then, huh? Figures.

"Than talk!" Burt yelled back and then clutched his left arm.

Kurt stopped being angry immediately and it quickly turned to worry when his father bent forward in pain. Carol quickly put her arms around Burt.

"Burt, honey? Are you okay?" She asked worriedly, "Finn call the ambulance! I think your father's having a heart attack!"

Kurt just stared at his dad as Finn ran into the next room to get the phone. I looked at Kurt and wanted to hug him so bad. He looked like he was going to collapse.

As the ambulance took Burt away, the whole neighbourhood came out of their houses to see what was going on. Carol demanded that me, Kurt, and Finn stay home as she disappeared with the paramedics. Kurt was sitting on the couch with tears spilling down his face. He just stared at the ground in fear with his hands clasped together on his lap. I slowly walked up to him and then sat down. He didn't move.

"Kurt..." I whispered.

He didn't look at me. I touched his shoulder and sighed. That was when he turned to look at me angrily. My head snapped to the right with a loud slap that echoed throughout the room. Tears froze in my eyes as I turned my head to look at him. He looked frightened again and he shook his head slowly.

"I guess I deserved that," I said, rubbing at the stinging spot on my cheek.

"I'm so sorry," He whispered and wrapped his arms around me, tightly squeezing me into a hug, "I'm sorry I hit you and I'm sorry about what I said,"

I nodded slowly and joined his hug, "So you only did it to get revenge on Blaine?"

He let me go and looked into my eyes, "Of course not," He whispered, "I did it the first time because, yeah I was angry at Blaine, but the other times were because... I felt something," He looked down at his hands, "I don't know what it was but it felt... good,"

I mentally sighed with relief and nodded slowly, "I felt something too,"

"What was it?" Kurt looked at my eyes again.

"I think it was love, Kurt," I whispered.

He stared at me a while longer and then shook his head, "That's impossible," He whispered.

I shrugged and then looked down at Kurt's trembling hands. I slowly clasped my hands around them and stopped them from shaking.

"You don't have to be gay to love a guy, and you don't have to be straight to love a girl, Kurt," I rolled my eyes, "I love you and I love Puck and... well maybe not so much Finn, but you get it," I shrugged. He laughed, "-but I know I'm a lesbian." He nodded and sighed.

Finn came into the room slowly and stared at us. I quickly let go of Kurt's hand and cleared my throat.

"So... how long has it been?" Finn asked me cautiously, probably scared I would kick his teeth in if he didn't use the right tone of voice.

"I thought you told me you knew about all of this?" I asked, folding my arms across my chest.

He shook his head, "No I knew about you being pregnant and Kurt secretly trying to help..." He pursed his lips.

"Wouldn't you have put the pieces together?" I asked, narrowing my eyes and wondering why I wasting my time with him.

"Of course not," Kurt mumbled.

Finn shot a glare at Kurt, "So how long?"

"3 months," I sighed.

He flared his cheeks and scratched at his forehead, "What are you going to do with it?"

I shrugged, "Probably keep it, I haven't really decided what to do yet,"

"Maybe it's best to give it away," Finn said silently. I looked up at him in disbelief but he put his hands up in surrender, "Hear me out,"

I looked at Kurt's large eyes and then loosened up a bit, "Fine,"

"When Quinn was deciding whether to give up her baby, I actually convinced her it was a good idea. Santana you're too young to be a mom and someone out there is not able to have children. You'll be doing a favour for them, yourself, and not to mention our families. I'm not trying to sound unreasonable, I just want what's best for you and my brother,"

I pressed my lips together and raised my eyebrows.

"Wow, Finn, that's the most sensible thing that you've ever said since God-knows-when," Kurt nodded slowly.

"Thanks Kurt, that mean a- wait, what?" Finn looked hurt.

"Thank you, Finn," I smiled, "I'm going to have to give it more thought though..." I looked down at my stomach.

Finn nodded and then took his phone out of his pocket when it started to ring. He put the iPhone to his ear.

"Hey? Oh, yeah? Oh I'm glad he's doing good. Okay mom, we'll be there soon," He hung up and looked at us, "Come on, let's go see how Burt's doing,"

I looked at Kurt and he was looking at me too.

I haven't been in a hospital for ages, ever since I got my tonsils removed. It always scared me hearing the screams of pain and smelling the sanitized air of such a large place with a bunch of people running around with scrubs on. When we were able to see Burt, Kurt held my hand tightly. I looked up at him. He looked frightened as hell. I hugged him tightly and led him into the room.

The last time this happened to Burt everyone tried to pray, and I remember the pain in Kurt's eyes when he saw it. Getting to know Kurt and seeing his father conscious and in a hospital bed attacked to a whole bunch of machines made me scared.

"Hey dad," Kurt whispered, letting go of me to grasp onto his dad's hand, "I am... so sorry for everything," He began to cry.

Burt just patted Kurt, "No son, it's not your fault." Burt gave a shake of his head. He looked at me with deeply sincere eyes. I pressed my lips together and looked down at the floor.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

"Everyone, just stop apologizing, I understand," Burt said. I looked up at him in surprise, "Kurt, I'm very disappointed in you... I thought you knew better then this,"

"I do, dad," Kurt said and pressed his forehead against the back of Burt's hand, "I know you're mad at me,"

"No, I'm not mad, just shocked," Burt assured him. He looked at me, "And Santana... if you have nowhere else to go... you can come stay with us,"

Kurt looked up at Burt quickly. My heart skipped a beat and I blinked. Burt gave a little smile.

"A-are you serious?" I asked in a terrified whisper.

Burt nodded, "I heard from Mr. Schuester about all of this earlier," Burt said. Kurt closed his eyes tightly and pressed his lips together, "I knew you about this for almost a month now but I didn't want to believe it, but somehow I knew it was true and knowing your parents, Santana, I knew you wouldn't have anywhere else to go."

"W-well actually -"

"Burt," He smiled.

"Burt," I nodded, "I didn't get kicked out... I didn't tell them yet,"

Kurt didn't react because he already knew, but Burt took a deep breath and sighed.

I knew what was next, I had to tell my parents. As I spoke with them on the phone, everyone was settled back at the Hummel-Hudsen house except for Burt, he had to stay in the hospital for other stuff. Carol stood by me, almost hugging me as my parents yelled at me through the receiver. I was crying, but not that hard because I knew they wouldn't understand my situation. I was just so thankful that Burt knew beforehand or my life would've been a living hell. Carol stood by me the whole time and comfortingly pet my hair or rubbed my back as I tried to explain myself to my parents.

"We're so disappointed in you, Santana," My father's deep voice hummed through the phone as I heard my mom wailing and crying in the background.

"Well you know what, I'm disappointed in you too," I said softly but hung the phone up in fury.

I burst out crying and clung onto Carol for support which she gladly supplied.

"Let me set up your room downstairs." Carol said.

"No, let her stay in my room, it's big enough," Kurt exclaimed.

"Kurt, honey, I don't think your father will be so happy about that. For now she stays in the basement,"

"I'll be fine, Kurt," I assured and gave him a smile.

He sighed and pouted. I rolled my eyes.

AN: NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE SOON! Hope you enjoyed! (: