Don't Blink, Don't Squint
Word Count: 1,156
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Nico/Dani, with reference to Dani/Matt and Dani/Ray
Spoilers: up to 1x05, definitely from 1x05.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I just break things.
Summary: Dani wasn't the only one squinting.
Author's Note: The start of this nagged at me after seeing the episode, and then it turned into this complicated thing where I did some analysis of Dani/Nico and Dani/Matt through her eyes and the whole thing just kind of got away from me...
Don't Blink, Don't Squint
"You were squinting."
Nico looked over Dani with a frown. "Squinting. That is a crime I cannot deny committing, though I am not certain which incident you're referring to...?"
She left the doorway and walked over to his desk, leaning over it meaningfully. "You said I squinted when I saw something I didn't like. I said you were squinting."
"I believe, in your profession, you call that a classic deflection," he began, placing his hands on the desk and getting as much into her face as she was in his. "You were avoiding the subject, trying to deny the observation. Still, you didn't like what you saw. Or rather, who you saw her with."
"But I wasn't the only one squinting. You didn't like what you saw, either. And it wasn't about the PR manager. It was not about the trainer. It was about me."
"Are you saying that I didn't like that you were squinting?"
She hesitated a little, almost backing off. In the face of that stoicism, she was no longer as sure about this as when she walked in. She had been convinced that she was on the right track. The epiphany she'd had about Nico's comment had surprised her, but the more she thought about it, the more it made sense.
Until now. Now, with him giving her that look, she faltered. She did not know if she should try and push this any further. She took a deep breath, figuring the hell with it. If she was wrong, she would deal with it. She'd been wrong before, and what could be more awkward than her situation with Matt?
"Yes," she answered with more confidence than she currently felt. "You didn't. You don't."
"Your relationship with Donnelly is less than professional, despite your efforts to the contrary. It is a concern for me."
"For you? Interesting phrasing. I would have thought you'd say it was for the players. For the team. Not for you," she remarked. "That's a bit too... overt for you, isn't it?"
"The team is a concern for me. The players are a concern for me. You, as their therapist, are a concern for me. Donnelly, as their trainer, is a concern for me. If you two cannot work together, the team has a problem. If the team has a problem, I have a problem."
"And that is all there is to it?"
"Your conflict of interest is with him, not with me. This conversation is a complication that no one needs."
"You're getting overt again. You almost said no, didn't you? You're getting close to opening up, aren't you?" she pressed, feeling a rush of power wash over her. She was close. She was really onto something now. "What is about my so-called conflict of interest that bothers you so much? Is it really about the team?"
Nico just looked at her. "You wantit to be about something besides the team, Doctor Santino."
"Now who's deflecting?"
"How good are you at staring contests?"
She didn't know what to think of that. "Excuse me?"
"Do you usually win? Because I do. And if this is a staring contest or if you think that you will really get me to talk, then I should remind you that all military personnel undergo training to resist interrogation. You will blink before me. And I will not talk."
She shook her head. "You already gave yourself away."
"And so did you, Doctor."
"I did?" she asked, surprised. "How did I give myself away?"
"You squinted."
"No, I didn't," she objected. "I have no problem with what I'm seeing. Or hearing. Or suspecting."
"As I said, you want it to be about something besides the team."
"And you can't look me in the eye and say it isn't. Go ahead, try. Even as good as your poker face is, there is no way you'll pull that one off, mister," she warned him, feeling emboldened and excited. She had no idea why this mattered so much to her—except, she did. She was suddenly blindsided by the revelation that he was right. She wanted it to be something other than the team. But why? She already had one man she worked with that she couldn't be involved with, one man who thought she was ridiculously hot, and she didn't need a bunch of men to validate her worth or position in the world. Why did she want Nico, too? Was she just... greedy? Was that all it was?
Nico was a puzzle. She hadn't figured half of him out yet, didn't know him. As far as men went, Matt was the safe bet. He was loyal and dependable and ridiculously hot. Nico was also good looking, that was a factor, but he was distant and secretive and meddling in her life when she didn't want him to, and why should she be happy with him or want anything from him?
"You know what it is, don't you?" he asked quietly. "You are looking for someone to fix. Donnelly is relatively well-adjusted. Me, I'm not, or at least that's how I appear, since no one knows me that well. You don't need someone to fix."
She shook her head. "It's not about fixing. It's about understanding."
"You don't need to do that, either."
"We work together."
"And that is all that it will ever be, so the matter can be dropped here and now."
"Oh, no, it can't," she disagreed, a smile spreading over her face. She pointed to him. "You, my friend, just blinked."
He smiled a little. "And you're squinting. You don't want to let this go. Even if you should."
"Answer me this: do you have a wife somewhere that you buried in your yard?"
"I am not that particular kind of dangerous, no. I bury other things in my yard."
"Ah ha, that is where you put the books you throw out, isn't it?"
"There is only so far that I can be pushed," he warned, gaining an edge to his voice. She heard the caution, knew that she should probably listen, but she couldn't seem to make herself back down. "Trust me when I say you should not pursue this."
"I would say that we already passed that point."
"You're in the exit only lane."
"So take the turn."
"You want Donnelly. You also just got separated and are in the process of a divorce. You do not want to go down this road."
"Nico?"
"What?"
"If I said, 'shut up and kiss me,' would you do it?"
"That depends. Are you going to blink?"
"Absolutely not."