Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN ANYTHING I SWEAR! STOP SENDING COPS TO MY HOUSE!

Kidding. But I don't own anything.

A/N: This is late. I know. I tried so hard to actually get it up for Christmas, but I don't have the willpower anymore. Anyway, as you read this keep in mind that I have no idea what happens to people that get stabbed, much less Slayers. All I know is that she passed out eventually because Buffy mentions it when she's talking to Riley…

Also, if the actual lines from the show are screwed up, blame it on my evil, EVIL sister who is currently insisting she can't go any longer without anime (it's been a stinking week, while I've been Buffy-deprived for months now) and my dad just took the computer cable with the wifi from the computer so he can plug it into the DVD player to make it connect to Netflix or something equally complicated. Thanks to her you might not be reading this until Wednsday or Thursday (sorry again).

Seriously, I am really, really sorry, for both the events I can control and the ones I can't.

(also, go read my sister's strange Phineas and Ferb fics—don't ask, she's obsessed with cartoons and anime—if you want. Her username is Krazy K0 or something… though I doubt any Buffy fans watch Phineas and Ferb… I dunno.. I just don't feel sympathy for people that aren't real, just drawings. They're too silly and demented-looking for me to "feel their pain", much less write fics that can be taken seriously or even read at all.

But I digress. And keep in mind this is just me ranting, I have nothing against anyone that watches anime or cartoons… I'm just internet-less and vengeful.)

(Like Anya!)

Echo was on Dawn's bed, as per usual, talking about whatever Dawn had done at school that day. Lately, after the panic attack during the invisible demon attack, Buffy had been leaving Echo at home, wanting her to be "safe". Echo knew she could endanger patrols, so she went along with it. It was much more fun to stay at home with Dawn anyway, much better than fighting vampires.

"—and that's why I can never go back to math class ever again!" Dawn was ranting. Something about a boy—there were so many that echo could barely keep track of them all—and some incident that was embarrassing and would make the aforementioned guy supposedly hate Dawn forever.

"It can't be that bad." Said Echo, as usual. "I mean, it's not like they'll remember forever. Even if they do you shouldn't let them get to you. Ignore them."

"I can't do that, it goes against all laws of the social hierarchy that is high school." Dawn said. She flopped onto the bed, jouncing Echo off. "My bad."

Echo righted herself and smiled. "I don't mind."

Dawn opened her mouth as though to say something when the doorbell rang. "Oh, that must be Cassandra!"

"Cassandra?"

Dawn turned in her beeline for the door. "Yeah, she's going to take me and a bunch of people to a movie. You want to come?"

Echo was touched Dawn thought she was cool enough to hang out with. "Really? I'd love to! But…"

"As Giles would say, 'Oh dear.' What is it?"

Echo sighed. "I might pass out, or something could happen with my memories that would make me go psycho and kill you all. Might put a damper on the movie part of the night."

"Okay." Said Dawn. "Look on the bright side; your sense of humor is already coming back, minus all the rude Faith-related parts."

"Really?"

"Really."

Echo was staring at the doorway long after Dawn bid her goodbye and the door slammed shut. She was getting her sense of humor back? Did that mean memories would follow, like a river after a stream? It was kind of scary, thinking about being this person she barely knew. Echo knew that Faith had been evil and had hurt everyone here (except Dawn, apparently, who technically hadn't existed). Did she really want to be that person again?

Echo stared into the mirror across the room. "I want to be…"

Echo? Faith? Caroline? Any of the other thin shells of people in her head?

"Maybe this is for a reason…" Echo mused, rolling on her stomach and thoughtfully looking at a pink stuffed bunny. "You know? Like now I have a chance to live my life as someone who's loved and cared for instead of Faith. Maybe I'm supposed to forget all the bad things…"

And then there was the incident with Paul. Echo couldn't remember who he was or what he meant to her, but he had scared her. She had hung at the outskirts of the party, waiting until he got frustrated and left. Still, the idea that her past was following her like a black stormcloud was a little disconcerting. It made the house suddenly eerie instead of quietly peaceful, the dark outside menacing rather than a blanket of sleep and safety.

Echo dropped the bunny and uneasily peered out the window. There was nothing unusual outside, not even a vampire—though that qualified as quite normal in Sunnydale—and she thought that it was just her imagination. The bad part about gaining an understanding of the world and coming out of her "doll" state of mind was that Echo was finding more and more things scared her than before.

Then there were voices, one low and male… and even familiar. There was a high-pitched yelp of pain. Echo thought of Dawn immediately, but it just didn't sound like her. Echo knew if Dawn was hurt she would know in a second. That was when she heard the male voice, much clearer this time, say, "Hello? Is anyone home? Echo?"

It was Riley. Echo stared for half a second more at the mirror and then called back to him. "What?"

"Buffy's hurt!"

For an unknown reason those two simple words set her veins on fire, and Echo felt her heart pounding. How was Buffy hurt? Was that even a possibility? There were too many questions in her head and not enough answers.

Echo clambered down the stairs, turning her ankle on some article of clothing that seemed to be Dawn's, but persisted. When she got to the kitchen she saw Buffy sliding down the side of the wall, unsupported by Riley. He was rummaging through the cabinets. "Damn it!" something hit the ground with a metallic thud. "Where do you keep everything?"

"Bathroom…" Buffy moaned. "Not in the kitchen."

Riley slammed the cabinet door shut. "Oh." He disappeared into the next room, evidently headed for the bathroom.

"Buffy?" Echo ventured timidly. She was scared by the sight of the one person she trusted to keep her and Dawn and the other Scoobies safe bleeding out on the stark kitchen floor. She mustered what courage she had left and got on her hands and knees, crawling over to the Slayer.

"The vampires got one good shot in this time." Buffy said ruefully, coughing and wincing when her body rocked forward. "Okay, that hurt. Wonder if it hurt vamps this much when I stake them…?"

Echo wondered if she was imagining the slightly loopy expression on Buffy's face. "Yeah… I don't really think that matters…"

"Nope." Buffy agreed. Her breath was starting to come in shorter gasps. "I'm getting really dizzy."

Echo tried to search her mind for any times that she could remember being stabbed, but there were none. Only hazy memories where a man was chasing her through the woods and trying to kill her.

Rey come back in and dumped a pile of medical supplies on the table. "We need to move you, okay? In case your Mom comes home."

"Okay." Buffy agreed, feebly trying to stand. "Oooowwww… hey, is this how you felt when Adam stabbed you? 'Cause I'm feeling a lot more sympathy now."

Riley's face was as pained as Buffy's, maybe even more so. Echo did think he was too controlling of her, but at least he cared. "Stay, I can carry you."

He gently slid his arms around her and lifted her, eyebrows sliding down farther every time she cried out or grabbed his arm and asked him to stop moving for a second. Echo wandered around helplessly, hovering near to the couple as she tried to think of something, anything that she could do. As usual, the fear-haze was clouding her mind until she couldn't see a thing. It was like someone was withholding the memories on purpose, laughing at her as she struggled to breathe.

When they got to the bedroom Riley put Buffy on the bed and then told Echo to try and keep out of the way, leaving her standing in the hallway with a thousand questions on her tongue and a heavy heart falling through the middle of the earth.

O.o.O.o.O.

Paul was more than frustrated. He had gone to the birthday party of a girl named Tara Maclay, who allegedly knew Echo/Faith/Caroline—he wasn't sure what to call her at that point—and he hadn't seen her anywhere. The blonde girl… Buffy. Buffy had been there, he was sure of that, but she had slipped away while he was trying to get in, and he hadn't seen her.

But he had seen her tonight, in the graveyard.

Paul had been wandering the moonless streets of Sunnydale looking for any clue as to where Echo was hiding when he heard what sounded like a fight. He had ended up in the closest graveyard, and there he had seen Buffy. She was beating the crap out of some guy with a malformed face when he grabbed her weapon—it had looked like a wooden stake—and turned it against her, jamming it into her stomach. She had pulled it out, but it was clear at that point that she was going to lose. Paul had been about to jump in, with thoughts that he could get her to tell him where Echo was if he saved her, but another man had plowed the attacking man over before he could finish off Buffy. The man, who Buffy called Riley, had done the strangest thing Paul had seen; he jammed a wooden stake into the malformed man's face, who promptly exploded into dust.

Paul still wasn't too sure about that… it could have been a trick of light, or maybe the attacker hadn't been a man. Maybe he wasn't a person. All Paul knew was that Riley had run over to Buffy and gently cradled her in his arms. He finally managed to get her up, and the two had staggered out of the grave yard and into the night.

Now he was crouched outside the house they had gone into, and he could have sworn he'd heard Echo's voice, saying, "What?" to Riley's call to see if anyone was home. There was some swearing on his part, and muffled groans, but the rest was too quiet to hear. Paul had even pressed his ear to the door (feeling very much like a stalker) and still couldn't make out the words. Eventually it sounded like Buffy was carried upstairs, followed by the person that sounded like Echo. He carefully made his way around to the front door, hoping that maybe if Echo answered he would have a chance at getting her to come with him.

He finally made it, but slid behind one of the bushes, feeling like he would be seen. Instead nothing happened for about three hours while crickets chirped and a bird sang for a while, then left.

"This is ridiculous." He told himself after a while, and stood up in time to come face-to-face with a teenage girl holding a purse behind her like it was a weapon.

"Who are you?" she demanded, her voice shaking slightly.

Paul said, "I… I was just… I was lost?"

She girl struck out more viciously than someone her size should have been able to, slamming the purse into his face and running to the door, screaming, "Buffy! BUFFY! BUFFY!" the whole way. She had shut and locked the door behind her before he was even on his feet.

Vision less reliable than he was used to, Paul staggered to the door and rang the doorbell. There was still a chance that Echo would answer, even if it meant that now he might have to fight off both Riley and the girl to talk to Echo.

O.o.O.o.O.

Echo heard Dawn's shrill screams, and she was the first to get downstairs. Dawn was huddled against the stairway, glaring at the door like she was daring it to open and let the evil at the other side get her. Echo wrapped her arms around Dawn's neck in a fast and clumsy embrace, then asked, "What is it? Vampires?" Word could have gotten out that the Slayer was injured, and there was a good chance that they would come and wait for her to leave the house.

"No…" Dawn gasped. "Some guy, I think I saw him at Tara's party… where's Buffy?"

"She got hurt." Echo said. Dawn's eyes grew round as marbles. "She's going to be okay, I think, but she's up[stairs and there's no way she can fight anyone off for a while."

"Riley?"

"He's helping her, I think." Echo wished with her heart and soul that her head would stop spinning for at least a minute. Before she could get in another word the doorbell rang and both of them froze.

"Do we answer?" Dawn whispered.

"Maybe… I guess we have to…" Echo said, uncertain. She got up and opened the door, poised to fight. The man from the party… Paul, that was his name… held up his arms defensively, but dropped them when he saw her.

"Echo?" he asked.

Echo nodded shortly. She could hear dawn panting behind her, too scared to move.

"I've been looking everywhere for you." He said. He made it sound like he was some long-lost lover of hers', or a relative. "You… you used to be Caroline. And Faith."

"I know." Echo said, proud that he voice didn't crack. Not even a little.

"Then you have to come with me, because there are a lot of people after Faith and Caroline, and you can't trust anyone." Paul said. He looked like he expected her to just follow him mindlessly. Echo could remember the days when she was blank, an innocent doll. Well, now she could think and feel and fight, and she knew in her heart he could only bring her suffering.

"No."

Paul was shocked. "What do you mean by 'no'?" He asked. "You don't understand how much danger you could be in at this house, with these people. How can you know that you can trust them?"

"I can think of a thousand reasons why." Said Echo. "From the minute I met them—save the whole 'Buffy-thinking-I-was-Faith-and-trying-to-beat-me-up' thing—they've done nothing but protect me. Buffy saved me from Dracula, she helped me fight when dawn got kidnapped, she rounded up all the different versions of me when Toth split me into about twenty different people, and when I got take by the Dollhouse she found me and she made sure I got back here. I have more than that, but I think you get what I'm trying to say."

"You have to come with me." He pleaded. "They could be trying to trick you." He almost seemed like a love-stricken puppy.

Echo shook her head. "No, I really don't. I have absolutely zero reason to trust you, and the only memory I have of you involves your fist and my face."

She slammed the door shut and locked it, heart pounding. It felt like she had just surrendered a huge part of herself to her new life as Echo. He—Paul—was connect to the Dollhouse, and they were the ones that could fix her.

Did that mean she didn't want to be Faith again?

Was she wrong?

O.o.O.o.O.

The same thing still bothered Echo on patrol. With Buffy still at home, trying to heal, she had gone on patrol with Riley, Willow, Xander, and Anya. Riley was creeping ahead of them, and he turned to gesture. Echo knew he had explained that hand motion to her earlier, but she couldn't recall what it meant. Instead she took a huge handful of chips from the bag Xander was holding.

"What's with the hand move?" Xander asked. "D'you see that? Does that, like, mean something?"

"It's code." Willow told him, watching Riley intently as he turned back at them and repeated the hand gesture. "I think it breaks down to 'choo-choo.'" She tried the same gesture, like the kind that Echo saw Dawn make to get truck drivers to honk their horns.

Anya looked bored, taking a handful of chips herself. "It probably means to follow him. That, or wait here for him."

"Hey Riley! What's the—" Xander mimicked Riley's hand gesture "—all about?"

"It means yell real loud, so the vampires who don't know we're coming will have a sporting chance."

Echo giggled at the expression of consternation on Riley's face. "LIKE THIS?" she yelled as loudly as she could.

"No!"

"See?" Xander said. "Now he's all mad and sarcastic."

As they continued through the graveyard and harassed Riley, Echo couldn't help but get lost in her thoughts again. if Buffy was going to go to the past to dig up answer, then so was she.

O.o.O.o.O.

The first place she went was the Bronze. It had a familiar air to it whenever she was there, but with friends around she couldn't think about that. Now, with nothing but the steady beat of the music pounding in her chest, and the alcohol coursing through her veins, Echo thought maybe she could rediscover Faith. She wasn't going to giver Faith up completely, not without know what it was like to be her.

Her mind started to get fuzzier as she drank more and more, until she stopped. She was afraid she would lose herself if she didn't. For a while she just sat, thinking about what she could remember.

Faith was a fighter, and she did like to party. But she also seemed to lack any sort of childhood, as was displayed by her loyalty to the Mayor, who Buffy claimed treated Faith like a daughter. Echo could feel the emptiness in her heart when she tried to imagine a Mom and a Dad, but it was because she couldn't remember anything. No family, no annoying relatives, no nothing.

It was getting too hot, and Echo shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She knew, from what she had heard, that right about now if she was Faith she would out on that dance floor in the smuttiest outfit possible, dancing her heart out. That was the last thing Echo wanted… she wanted to be at home, snuggled up on the couch with Dawn.

As she walked home, stopping to glance at the graveyard, she wondered if that was why she shunned Paul so easily. Had her life back then been that miserable? Had Faith partied so hard because she wanted to drown out her life with alcohol and sex? Was she supposed to never know this past? Would it break her if she did?

There were too many question left unanswered, but Echo gave in to the comfort that not knowing left her. It meant that she could keep being friends with Dawn and Buffy, and it meant that the Scoobies would eventually come to see her as harmless, maybe part of the family. If Faith got back into her head… she would remember all the horror, all the things that made the Scoobies hate her. She didn't want that.

As soon as she gave up Echo felt like a weight had been lifted from her chest. All that was left was to stay safe from the Dollhouse. Sure, maybe it would be harder to find out what they were up to without her memories, but she realized that if they didn't want to get her Faith memories back from the Dollhouse then she and the Scoobies wouldn't have to go after the Dollhouse.

The drunken haze she was in was making it hard for Echo to think. She found herself suddenly in front of the Summers' house, her home, when her vision blurred and she was somewhere else.

.. she was standing, on the porch. Some sort of leather top was contrasting her breathing, with a dark-colored jean jacket covering her shoulders and very exposed waist. Behind her a younger Mrs. Summers was staring in astonishment at the snow outside. It was snowing.

"Can you believe that?" She asked, shaking her head. "And they say there won't be any sun, not all day!"

No sun… Buffy can save Angel! Echo thought, but she realized very abruptly she wasn't Echo at all. She was Faith, and she was in Faith's body. She was remembering all sorts of things. Happy ones and sad ones and the ones buried so deep in her memory that even when she tried to think about them she could feel her brain shy away from them.

It was too much to handle. The rush of pure happiness at seeing the snow for the first time in years, blocking out all the bad memories. Faith/Echo blacked out before she could soak in the snow for a minute more.

And then Echo was lying on the ground in front of the Summers' house, shaking and sweating and burning up while she froze to death. She ended up being carried inside by Buffy, who was much better and said she had gotten some information out of Spike. There was heated, blurry chaos everywhere for a while, and something about Mrs. Summers having to be at the hospital for observation, but it went over Echo's head. She didn't know what to think anymore. There was nothing left from her memory of Faith except for the joy that was almost too painful to think about. For someone to be that happy about snow… they had to have had a terrible life.

Eventually she got better, after a few hours of sleep. Dawn was curled up on the couch, watching TV with one eye and Echo with the other. "How did the soul-searching go for you?" she asked. Her voice was bitter, probably because of her Mom and what Echo thought she had heard.

Echo shrugged. "I got really drunk, and I blacked out. Is that Faith-like?"

"Not the blacking out part… unless you had a threeway or something, which would make you very Faith-like."

"Oh." Said Echo. "I do know one thing, though."

"Yeah?"

"No matter how much it scares me or what it costs, I have to find her again." Echo knew that it would be hard and painful, but Faith was too broken to be left to die, to fade into the mist. She deserved help, and Echo was determined to do just that.

A/N: YAY for sappy endings and no spellchecking again!