When I say I love you, I can tell you are afraid.

When you call me 'Natalia' I can sense regret in your tone.

Do you wish you didn't have to speak to me?

When I call you 'Ni-san' you are immediately edgy.

You believe in the love of your god of all things…

Yet you are wrapped up in all matter of sins.

When I am with you, do you wish it was… Ukraine instead? Do you, Big Brother?

Is that because she is so nice?

Well, you call her a cry-baby!

So I try to not be her.

I became me, this hollow shell of a girl with only one mind set.

You.

Yet…

When I fell off of that unstable cliff and landed on the ice twenty feet below, why did you run to save me?

Why where you screaming my name as your boots slipped on the ice that wanted you to stay back?

As I felt warm blood pool around the ice around me and the ice began to crack underneath my pale frame, why did I see a tear on your cheek from under my hair.

That isn't fair.

You can't do that! You can't! Not fair!

I want to reach out, but I can't. Why not? My heart begins to race as I look up at the cliff above the icy lake that I lay on. It was much higher than expected.

Why did I have to fall? Why?

You are close now, yet I can feel the ice giving out below me. Will I be plunged into the water below?

I sigh shakily as my broken and numb limbs fail to work, and the ice finally gives. First the water didn't seem that cold, but it soon hit me with force. My limp figure gasped for breath as the cold strangled me, and tried to call out. I manage to raise my hand as my head goes under.

Slowly, I accept death.

You don't love me after all, do you Big Brother? Not at all? Why not?

The last question swam in my head like the cold water that was killing me.

Not fair.

I love you—Isn't that how it works? Like in the fairy tales you used to tell me, Big Brother Russia? A princess loves someone and he loves her back?

Is it because I am not a princess?

Not fair.

Death is a relief now- When I die you will not follow me. You cannot, because I know you will not die for many, many years. So I wish for death, sweet death. Now I can be a princess too, while you betray your Little Sister and marry someone else. I realize I do not want to see that.

I would rather die.

Not fair.

Suddenly a warm, big hand grabs my arm and yanks me upwards. My eyes are closed, but I know it is you. As you drag me off of the ice, leaving a bloody trail of my blood behind us, something hits me.

I am going to live, Big Brother.

I will have to grow up and watch you get married and have children that you will expect me to love and cherish. I will never love those monsters, just reminders of how you betrayed me.

You hold my broken body in your arms and whisper in my ear "Little Sister, are you okay? Please, hold on. Ukraine is on her way—we will get you to a hospital and-"

I build up the strength to try to wriggle from your arms, meekly trying to go back to the ice and drown. You look confused and worried, so you keep me far away from the death that I want.

"Nyet…" I whisper as you hold me close. "Nyet…"

"Sister, no. Stay away from the ice—you are going to live." You whisper again, laying her chin on the top of my head. I used the last of my strength to push your chin away.

Because I will live and you are no longer mine to keep.

Not fair.