First foray into the Glee fandom. Methinks I'm lost.

Story takes place after the 1st season, the summer between sophomore and junior year. One-shot for now.

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing, cause I'm broke.

The first rule of fight club is you don't talk about fight club.

Quinn knows this because Puck told her so.

The club meets Saturday nights in a bar-slash-restaurant that had been shut down years ago for having too many health code violations. Or at least, Quinn thought it had been shut down years ago—but everything is different at night. The rules change; adapt or die.

The second rule of fight club is you don't talk about fight club.

Puck takes her to the shuttered-down bar because something (Beth) hovers between them, a connection that transcends shallow high school relationships and short-lived romances. Also, she has nothing planned for the summer and is bored out of her mind.

But when Quinn follows him into the abandoned space, down into the basement where restless young men wired with muscle are looking to expel their energy in some misguided notion of glory and brawny older men are trying to pound out their frustrations with their disappointing lives, Quinn sees her. Rachel Berry, the midget singing extraordinaire who can't shut her mouth or dress fashionably to save her life. Quinn's first impulse is to shout, "What is Berry doing here?" but that would break the first and second rules of fight club. Also, Puck's large hand clamping over her mouth stops her.

The third rule is only two guys to a fight.

Or in this case, two people. Actually, make that one and a half, because there's no way Rachel Berry could be considered equal to the hulking guy with a buzzcut staring down at her. She's literally half the size of her opponent, whom Quinn so imaginatively dubs Buzzcut.

The fourth rule is one fight at a time.

They're surrounded by a circle of jeering, cheering men. Two contenders, sizing each other up; Quinn has never seen Rachel Berry other than confident, and tonight is no exception. She looks unafraid, fists held loosely in front, eyes on her opponent as he shuffles his feet, looking antsy.

Quinn hits Puck's arm and hisses, "Do something! She's going to get killed!" At Puck's curious look, she amends, "Not that I care, or anything, but I really don't want to be a witness to murder."

Puck shakes his head. "She's fine. Just watch and enjoy the show."

And so Quinn does.

The fifth rule is to fight without shirts or shoes.

Quinn can't help but notice that Rachel Berry—the annoying loudmouth who was never seen as attractive by anyone—actually has a very nice body underneath her argyle sweaters. The small girl is in a black sports bra and shorts, bobbing and weaving around Buzzcut. She knows—from Rachel's long-winded rants during Glee club—that the brunette took dancing and singing and whatever else lessons since she was three months old, but from the way Rachel slams her palm into Buzzcut's throat, she also apparently takes martial arts lessons, too.

The sixth rule is that fights go on as long as they have to.

Quinn flinches when Buzzcut whirls around in a sudden burst of energy and slams his fist into Rachel's jaw. Rachel is flung to the ground from the sheer force, but she quickly rolls onto her stomach and picks herself up. The crowd goes wild.

"How is she still conscious?" Quinn hisses to Puck. The mohawked boy shrugs, looking impressed by his "fellow Jew."

Quinn watches with wide eyes as Rachel snaps into a spin kick that connects with Buzzcut's ribs, causing him to bend over in pain. An elbow to the temple brings him down, a knee quickly placed on a pressure point in his arm. Rachel lets all her body weight slam into Buzzcut's pressure point, and the man grits his teeth in pain until Quinn's sure his teeth will break. Buzzcut stretches out his other arm and taps the ground twice. Immediately, Rachel is off of him and holding out a hand to help Buzzcut up before taking a dramatic bow to an adoring crowd. Well, at least that was typical Berry behavior.

Quinn's jaw drops. "What was that?"

Puck smiles proudly. "That was Berry kicking his ass. I told you she could take care of herself—Rachel's one of the best here."

"The tapping thing?"

"If someone says stop, goes limp, or taps out, the fight is over. Rachel has never given up a fight yet."

"How come she never did that to anyone who slushied her?"

Puck shrugs. "I don't know. With great power comes great responsibility, or some shit like that."

"Are you crazy? She's nearly half the size of everyone here!" Quinn hisses.

"Nah. Some guys are pretty shrimpy—and there are a couple other girls, too. Santana's only got a few inches on Rachel."

Quinn chokes. "Santana comes here?" Actually, that's not too surprising.

Puck laughs. "That girl is vicious. She uses her nails, you know?" He mimes scratching his face. "Bloody streaks down both cheeks, usually. I mean, I like my women rough, but Santana is almost too much. She's ten times worse on days when Brittany decides to fight."

Now Quinn knows she's dreaming. "Pinch me."

Puck wiggles his eyebrows. "I can do a lot more than that, baby mama—"

"Don't call me that."

Quinn vaguely notices another fight has begun, but her gaze is focused on Rachel. The petite brunette is scanning the crowd, seemingly searching for someone, when their eyes connect. Rachel immediately scowls, and Quinn is taken aback by the anger in those dark eyes—the last time she saw Rachel, the girl had given her a huge smile and wished her a good summer before riding into the sunset with Finn.

Quinn keeps her eyes locked on Rachel as the brunette heads toward them. Rachel eventually manages to squeeze through the crowd, giving Quinn a terse nod before glaring up at Puck. "Noah, why did you bring her?"

Quinn blinks, offended. "I have a name, RuPaul."

Rachel frowns at her. "As do I, Quinn. I repeat, Noah, why did you bring her here?"

"Excuse me, but I have as much a right to be here as you do," Quinn bites back.

Rachel looks at her darkly. "Then I assume you know the rules?" Puck looks nervous.

Quinn scoffs. "Of course I do."

Rachel nods. "Good. Then you know that if this is your first night at fight club, you have to fight."

"Of course I knew—" Quinn's breath hitches. "Wait, I have to what?"

The first rule of Glee club is you don't sing about Glee club.

The second rule of Glee club is you don't sing about Glee club.

The third rule of Glee club is only two people in a diva-off.

The fourth rule is only one song at a time (unless, of course, it's a mash-up.)

The fifth rule is to sing at competitions without any planning beforehand.

The sixth rule is that songs will go as long as they have to—unless you are Tina Cohen-Chang.

The last rule is that you will review after reading! (Well, it's more of a suggestion than a rule, really.)