A Cup of Teardrops

Note: Portal 1 and 2 belong to Valve. Please tell me if you want me to continue.

It's been quite a long time since I've written something, so I may be just a little rusty. Hope you enjoy it, anyways.

#1. Apology

It's been two months after her spectacular... adventures, one would call them, at Aperture, and Chell was simply not satisfied with her life. Going to a job, working daily, returning bored out of her mind, fatigued, and in desperate need of a friendly face. Twice she thought about returning to Aperture, but she immediately discarded those thoughts; yes, GLaDOS did let her out, but if the omnipotent AI ever saw her again, Chell was completely sure it would not waste a second to activate her deadly neurotoxin, and, while waiting patiently for it to start, taunt her about her generous-ness. So that idea went out of the window.

At times, though, she thought about that stupid - stupidstupidstupidstupid - Intelligence Dampening Sphere. She hated him for making her remove him forcefully from GLaDOS' mainframe, she hated him because she had trusted him, hated him because he broke that trust, and most of all, she hated him because he made her feel this stupid way.

She didn't want to stay in America, but she didn't have the money to move out of her small apartment, let alone buy a plane ticket and a new home in a completely different place. So she worked even harder, taking on two jobs; one in the day - working at a small grocery shop -, and one in the night, as a guard at a second-rate museum.

Chell missed it all; she missed the steril smell of the test chambers (and later on, when Wheatley took over, the constant smell of smoke and gel fumes), missed GLaDOS' dry humor, Wheatley's favorite phrases (she still remembered all the times he'd said "Livid!"), and the adrenaline she felt when the turrets spotted her, greeted her politely in that adorable voice, ten proceeded to shoot every inch of her skin.

Every night, when climbing in a bus to arrive to her nightly working place, she'd look up at the stars and imagined Wheatley and the Space Core floating somewhere in space. Then she'd suddenly smile, remembering the Core's enthusiastic shout of "Spaaace!". But then she'd darken, remembering the way Wheatley begged her not to let go.

It didn't take GLaDOS too much to make Chell understand that the way Wheatley acted was not entirely because of him; but because the small sphere was not build for such power over everything, not build for that damned itch, not build with the mental capacity to push past it. Her mainframe corrupted him, and that's what drove the English sphere to try and kill them.

It was a Sunday, so Chell returned earlier from the grocery shop. She quickly stopped by at an internet cafe (how useful it was to have moved right next to one) and sent a message to the museum administration that she would not make it that night. She was completely tired, barely able to keep her eyes open, and she just wanted to sleep.

Entering her apartment, giving her Companion Cube a loving glance, getting dressed in some random tank top and pants, and crawling into bed were regular activities for her.

The knock on the door, just as she was about to fall asleep, was not.

Chell ignored it, hoping that whoever was outside the door would just fuck off and leave her alone. She couldn't exactly yell at them to go away for her vocal functions were never actually the same after her nine nine nine nine nine [REDACTED] years in cryo.

Whoever it was insisted.

So Chell got grumpily out of her bed, yawned once, and walked to her door, looking through to see who it was. It was a tall, lanky man, with messy auburn hair and shocking blue eyes. He had black, thick-rimmed glasses, and his face held an expression of anxiousness, constantly biting his lower lip. He raised his fist again, about to knock, when Chell opened the door.

A few seconds were spent into awkward silence. Chell raked her brains to try and figure out if she knew him - she was pretty sure she didn't. The only one she could remember was the crazy man who drew on walls, but he didn't really count since she never really saw him, and she was pretty sure he was dead. So who was this man?

Seeing she wasn't saying anything, the man inhaled deeply and started talking.

"I know you don't want to see me right now, since, you know, I did try to kill you - and, mind you, I'm happy it didn't work - but please hear me out," he pleaded, still anxious, with small beads of sweat rolling down his forehead.

Chell recognized his accent in an instant, and, instead of glaring at him, she opted for another solution: stare at him in utter disbelief. Last time she checked, he was a metallic sphere, rolling into space, all alone with the exception of the easily excitable Space Core.

When all that sunk in, her eyes glinted darkly, and she stuck her hands on her hips.

"I - I wanted to apologize," Wheatley stammered nervously. "I've behaved - bossy, and, and monstruous, and I wasn't any better than She was. Except, maybe - bloody hell - I was as bad as her, even worse, because I was stupid too, a moron, like she used to call me - still calls me that, yeah. But the second I was plugged out of that mainframe I was so desperate, because - I didn't want to die. And I couldn't apologize then, as I'm sure you can remember." He scratched the back of his head uncertainly. "So, um, flippin' heck, I'm sure you're livid by now, so -" he gulped, extending his arms to his side "- I've said what I wanted to say, and I'm very, very sorry, Chell, I - you can hit me now."

So she did. She slapped him with all the force she could muster, ignoring the way tears sprung at her eyes when she noticed him cowering after her strike, and slapped him on the other cheek, just for good measure.

When no more hits came, he looked up at her, both his cheeks flaming red. Straightening out, he cautiously approached her, alarmed at the sudden teardrops on her cheek.

"Are you okay?" he asked, frantic. "Are you supposed to be leaking like that? It's not anything important, is it?"

She shook her head.

"Was it me? I'm sorry if it was me. I should leave, I'm sure you have your own life by now," he rambled, unaware of the sudden appearance of fear in her eyes. "So, um, yeah. I guess I'll just go back to Aperture then..."

His eyes widened though, when she grabbed a fistful of the front of his shirt, forced him to lean down at her level, and smashed her lips against his.

#2. Hard Light

The lift doors opened once more for her, and she tiredly dragged herself to the next chamber.

"You are almost at the last chamber," GLaDOS said pleasantly. Chell didn't believe her.

She sent a blue portal at a light bridge, and another orange one at another end of the room so she could press a button. When a cube fell onto the bridge, she went over to pick it up, but suddenly the power went out.

"What? Who turned the lights off?" GLaDOS asked in confusion.

A few panels opened up, showing a small sphere with an shockingly blue optic. "Hey! Over here! I'm speaking in an accent that is beyond her range of hearing!" Wheatley said, sounding proud of himself.

Chell doubted that.

"Look, metal ball - I can still hear you."

"Run - I don't need to do the accent. Run!" Wheatley yelled at her, moving some more panels out of the way so she could get through. "So in case you were wondering, we are escaping. Right now, actually."

Chell didn't do anything to dignify him with a response; instead she ran harder than ever in her life. A test chamber opened up on their left. "You were at your last test chamber, too. See, I even made you a light bridge."

"Psh. How stupid does she think we are?" Wheatley asked, rolling his optic - which widened as he looked, horrified, in front of them.

Turrets.

"We need to get you out of here!" he shouted, as he followed the management rail. Chell snuck behind one, turret, picked it up then threw it on the ground. In its confusion, it shot the other two turrets, which fell over and started shooting randomly. Chell spotted a portal surface on the other side, shot an orange portal there and a blue portal right next to her. Quickly, she went through it, and they were alone.

"At least she can't catch us here," Wheatley said. "What are you doing?" he asked curiously, just as she sat on the catwalk. She glared at him briefly, before yawning hugely. Chell closed her eyes, as Wheatley ohh-ed, understanding. "You need rest, don't you? Yeah..."

He was silent for a few seconds, in which Chell's head dropped on her knees, which were up the her chest.

"Don't you miss human contact? I mean, humans, aren't they the most sociable organics out there?" Wheatley asked.

Chell's head snapped to him, and she gave him a deadpan stare.

"You do miss human contact, don't you?" Wheatley asked. "How did you get here, anyway?"

Chell shook her head and then shrugged, closing her eyes tightly.

"You can't remember? ...Well, I guess you have been in here for quite a long time, so I'd imagine you wouldn't remember anything, what with the brain damage and all that..."

Chell shook her head once more. "What?" Wheatley inquired curiously. She shook her head again, pointing at her forehead. "Are you trying to say that you don't have brain damage?" he asked in disbelief. She nodded. "Then why can't you talk?" Chell glared at him and pointed at her neck. "Oooh... you simply can't? You're mute?"

Chell nodded.

"That's... well, that's a bit, sad, I guess..." Wheatley thought for a few seconds. "Look, I'm going to try something here, but it is bloody dangerous. I could die."

Chell rolled her eyes and went back to sleep.

Wheatley's optic narrowed in concentration. "AAAAH! Oh. Um. Okay. Could you look up?"

Tiredly, she did, and froze.

In front of her was a perfectly warm, perfectly there, man, with sort of a confused, childish look on his face. He wore glasses and had the bluest eyes she'd ever seen.

Chell touched him, and immediately retreated.

"So, um, this is - uhhh - hard light. It's a bit hotter than the average human skin, but - " Wheatley closed his optic a bit " - they said I would DIE. Honestly, why, why did they even BOTHER giving me these things if they didn't want me to use them? It's mad! Completely bonkers!"

Seeing Chell was very hesitant in even looking at the man, Wheatley softly encouraged her. "Come on, love. You can touch him. He won't hurt you, I promise."

Hesitantly, she lifted a hand and touched his chest. He looked down, and smiled softly at her. Her resolve broke, and she found herself snaking her arms around his waist and burying her head in his shoulder, sobbing violently.

He placed his chin atop her head and carefully massaged her back, releasing all the knots. That's how she fell asleep there, in the arms of the hard light man Wheatley had created for her.

#3. Groceries

"So where are we going?" Wheatley asked nervously as Chell drove, a smile on her face.

"Grocery shopping," she said shortly.

"Um, sorry - what?" he asked once more, his eyes shifting anxiously from left to right.

Chell looked at him crossly. "I go out one hour without you, and you manage to eat everything in the fridge. Honestly, Wheatley."

"Hey, I was hungry! Plus, isn't that what you humans do?" Wheatley asked indignantly. "The food was just so bloody good..."

"Oh, I know," Chell snorted. "Alright, fine, you can eat." Wheatley beamed. "Just wait until we visit GLaDOS next month, she won't wait a second to mock your generousness."

"I won't get fat," Wheatley said, sure of himself.

"Oh really?" Chell asked, amused. "I can already see something pudgy forming."

Wheatley twitched. "So... what do we do at the grocery shop?"

"Buy groceries."

Wheatley groaned. "What groceries?"

"Veggies."

His eyes widened in horror.

#4. Kill

"Only two more chambers 'till your big surprise!" Wheatley said, sounding extremely happy.

"I think I can get us out of here in the next chamber," GLaDOS muttered to Chell as she entered the test chamber. "Just play along."

Chell nodded softly, making to go onto the Aerial Faith Plate. It shot her up in the air, only to the right instead of forward. "Surprise! We're doing it now!"

"Credit where it's due; for a little idiot designed to make terrible ideas, this is a pretty well-laid trap," GLaDOS said, sounding disgruntled.

"You probably guessed it already, but I don't need you anymore," Wheatley told them, his voice radiating cheerfulness. "I found two little robots down here, build specifically for testin'!"

Chell looked down at GLaDOS, raising an eyebrow.

"Uh oh. He found the cooperative testing initiative. It's... something I came up with to phase out human testing just before you escape. Fair's fair: you did try to kill me."

Chell frowned and bit her lip. A panel pushed them from the funnel, making them land on a panel in front of many large screens.

"This is the part where he kills us!" GLaDOS said, extremely panicked.

"Hello! This is the part where I kill you!" Wheatley said cheerfully. "Had a bit of a brainwave; there I was, smashing some steel plates together, and I though, 'yeah, it's deadly, but something's missing'. So I came up with this. At some point I would like them to shoot flames at you right before they smash you, but... well, you can't have everything. So - no portal surfaces, no nearby walkways, and only a large pit. So, if you don't want to be impaled, you could jump down there. I'm pretty sure there's some toxic waste down there, so you'll die if you do that, but less painfully. So... goodbye, love."

Chell stared at him defiantly, a shadow of hurt passing her eyes, even as the spike plates pummeled her onto the panel. As they went back up, Wheatley was met with the rather gory sight of a disfigured human.

There was a bit of silence, in which he realized what he had done. "No. Nononononono."

"Yes," came the weak voice of the potato, which somehow survived. "Look at what you've done. You destroyed my facility. Tried to destroy me. Disfigured her to death. The one person who never called you names, and always listened to you."

"Nooo, I'm not listening to you."

"You really are a moron. This place is going to explode, and you've killed your only friend (because she still considered you a friend, why, I have no idea) and the only person who could have saved us all. Congratulations."

A few claps. "Because you're such an idiot, we're all going to die."

Wheatley closed his optic, and everything exploded.

#5. Insanity

It was about time she figured out how to croak out words.

"I told you not to put these bloody cores on me!" Wheatley raged as the Adventure core kept babbling on about "pretty ladies" and "black belts in all departments".

"When life gives you lemons..." Chell muttered. Everything seemed to stop as both AIs heard her.

"I'm sorry - what?" Wheatley asked, confused.

Chell glared at him, lips pursed together. "While I was down there, I learned something. From the CEO of Aperture, Cave Johnson." She laughed, for a moment sounding exactly like Her. "You gave me lots of lemons, Wheatley. I trusted you. But guess what?" she challenged, smiling.

"Uhhh... what?" he asked.

GLaDOS seemed rendered speechless.

"I'm not going to take these lemons. In fact, I'm going to burn your house down."

Wheatley stared at her for a few moments, before snorting. "Love - I don't have a house."

"EXPLOSION IMMINENT."

"Isn't Aperture your house?"

Moments of silence. GLaDOS shook her optic, utterly mortified. "NO! Nonononononono-"

"Fact: You are going to get us killed," deadpanned the Fact core in GLaDOS' mechanical arms.

Seconds later, Wheatley figured out what Chell meant.

"I'M THE ONE WHO'S GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!" Chell screamed once more, before dropping her portal gun on the floor and heading toward's Wheatley's blue optic.

"I told you - I am going to let you go when you put me back in charge!" GLaDOS yelled at her, throwing her the Fact Core. "You DO have brain damage, don't you?"

"One can endure this much before one snaps," Chell said calmly.

"Look - just take the core and put it on him, then PRESS THE BUTTON!"

"Fact: It is pointless."

"Shut up!" GLaDOS snapped.

Wheatley could just stare at them, helpless, as the timer kept ticking.

00:00:27

"Well, until then, I'm still connected," he told them. "And I have no idea how to fix this place."

"Then put me back in charge!" GLaDOS snapped at him, her core closer to them than before.

"Spaaaaaaaaaaceeee..."

00:00:18

Chell laughed softly, in a defeated way.

"There's still time!" GLaDOS begged her. "Plug the core in, then press the Stalemate Button!"

"This timer's not stopping anytime soon. It's time for the Adventure Sphere to jump in."

"Just tell me how to fix this place!" Wheatley yelled at them both. "There's still time! We can still fix this!"

"I CAN'T!" GLaDOS told him. "That much information simply isn't handled by 1.1 volts of electricity!"

"Well that's bloody fantastic, innit?"

"Fact: Imminent death, approaching."

00:00:02

Chell leaned over to Wheatley, watching as his optic widened, and pressed her lips against his metal casing.

The facility exploded.