Notice:One of the story's readers has created a deviantart chatroom designated 'PopRPChat'. I have been popping in periodically, particularly while writing, and while it is currently somewhat lonely, I think it's an interesting idea, even if I do rather suck at Roleplaying. The creator goes by the name Koal103, and he is in need of Admins and such, so please contact him, or pop in if you're the type to be interested in such things.

I do apologize for the bolded text, but I am aware that many people ignore Author notes, and gave my word that I would make it known.

I would also like to recommend a story I came across: Vulpine, by Saphroneth. It's not a very long one, but complete, pretty crackish, and funny as hell... and does something I could never manage by addressing every bloody arc in the series up to about the 'capture' of the Hachibi. (In less than a hundred thousand words even.)

Disclaimer: See Chapter One

"Open wide and say 'Ahh'."

"Laaa!"

"Hmm, mhm, uhuh... and that's good," Hana declared, removing the tongue depressor and letting Kirlia close her mouth.

"Picture perfect and minty fresh," the woman commented approvingly. "It's been a long time since I've done a checkup on a pokemon who actually brushes their teeth."

"Naruto says it's a good habit," Kirlia agreed, sending a smile and a wave of comforting feelings to her partner, currently sulking in a corner, looking distinctly uncomfortable.

Iruka-sensei had been kind enough to schedule their appointment, which the boy had forgotten, and had even arranged for Hana to be available to do the job again, in an attempt to reassure his student.

The teacher had sorely underestimated Naruto's dislike for hospitals though, unaware that most of the boy's visits had been unpleasant affairs of test after test, almost from the moment he entered the door.

Of course, it was his own fault, since no one wanted a repeat demonstration of the Hokage storming through the building, nearly apoplectic in anger... Enraged after visiting the boy at home to check on him after receiving reports of the boy suffering a head injury, only to find him with his face buried in the freezer attempting to alleviate a mysterious migraine.

Learning that the boy had escaped before more than the entry tests had been completed did little to end the Hokage's ire, even if a portion of it turned onto Naruto himself for ignoring such a potentially serious injury, and Naruto was added to the list of ninja who were to be diagnosed ASAP, lest they disappear when no one was looking.

For a career path that dealt with blood and death as a matter of course, it was a surprisingly long list.

But when offered the chance to remain in the waiting room, Naruto declined, insisting on his desire to 'be there' for Kirlia, though he remained in his corner, arms crossed and watchful of every move that Hana made.

It was enough to make both females glad that Hana had invented an errand for him to run too give her the few moments she needed to draw blood.

Kirlia did what she could to push her partner's apprehension from her mind, short of cutting the flow completely, knowing that if he thought it necessary, he might do something unpleasantly reckless to get them away.

So she put on a brave face and suffered through the torment and indignity of a full examination.

Measuring her height... (Oh no!)

Her weight... (The embarrassment!)

Taking her pulse and blood pressure... (Please no more!)

Checking her reflexes with a tiny hammer... (Agony of agonies!)

And more than a dozen other tests of dubious discomfort.

Heels to horns, everything was inspected, noted and approved.

It wasn't exactly how she would have preferred to spend a morning, but it was far from the nightmare Naruto seemed to expect... In fact, it wasn't even all that unpleasant, Hana felt like a kind woman, and her desire to provide comfort was obvious.

Thankfully, the woman was also very much a professional, and the entirety of the exam was concluded in just over an hour, despite being as thorough as she could possibly make it.

"I suppose that's it..." The Inuzuka heiress decided, flipping through the sizable stack of paperwork on her clipboard one last time before opening the door and beckoning them out. "Mission schedule permitting, I'll expect you back again between six and twelve months from today, sooner if she evolves again, or develops an issue of some sort."

"So we don't gotta be back for a whole year?" Naruto asked, perking up for the first time since his arrival. "Sounds good to me!"

"Up to a year," Hana corrected sternly. "You've proven your ability to take care of her, and she's certainly healthy and happy, but we have to work together to keep our pokemon that way. Frequent checkups are just one way to do that, and a ninja should always take care of their partner, their comrades, and their equipment."

"...I gotcha," Naruto grumbled, nodding his acceptance of the rebuttal as he trudged through the door, taking Kirlia's hand when she offered it. "We'll be back, but I hope you don't mind if I hope it ain't soon."

"Hmm... I'll hope the same," Hana replied teasingly. "Unless you and Kiba end up tangling in the finals... I don't want to see anyone injured, but I gotta back my boneheaded little brother."

As she spoke, Hana followed them out, her Dustox slipped down from the ceiling, landing perched half on the woman's shoulder, and half on her head, humming a greeting to the others.

Hana reached up and rubbed a hand across the carapace over Dusty's cheek, silently apologizing for leaving her partner outside the room in deference to her patient's comfort, a standard protocol in the veterinary hospital, though exceptions were made for pokemon like Blisseys or Audinos, who possessed immediately applicable medical skills, and an innate tolerance from even the least pleasant of pokemon.

The group passed through a number of hallways on their way to the exit, Hana's mind already turned towards her next appointment.

So it was understandable that she didn't notice when Kirlia jerked to a stop for a brief moment as they entered the waiting room, before sublimating the impulse and continuing on.

"You okay? What's goin' on?" Naruto asked quietly, leaning close and looking in the direction Kirlia was, trying to spot the cause of her spike of fear through the window she looked towards.

"I'm fine," she replied quickly. "Its... I didn't realize how long we were here... I was worried that we might miss Kakashi-sensei."

"Yeah right," Naruto scoffed grouchily. "He probably won't show up for another hour at least!"

"Maybe... but we should still get going!" Kirlia declared, taking hold of Naruto's hand with both of hers and dragging him towards the door.

As she did, she glanced one more time at the man near the window, reading some magazine or other... intact, and ignorant of the sight she had seen...

He looked nothing like the flame seared corpse she had seen for that one brief moment.

It was the first of many such visions, her growing strength opening her more and more to the mysteries of time and the future's flow... and she found death waiting around the corner with disturbing frequency.

Even avoiding the village proper didn't help, as she learned a few days after her visit with Hana, having teleported from home, to the training fields, to Iruka's house, and back to their home. Evading everyone except their closest friends...

A day of absence, a day of avoidance, and the vision she looked out over in the dawn light, when she was most receptive to the silent pattern of existence, was a living nightmare.

The village wall torn in three places, homes and businesses crushed into debris, the Hokage tower toppled, and the mountain scarred almost beyond recognition.

Envisioning a ninja's death had been troubling, and not entirely unexpected... but so many?

This must be why... this mirage which sparked a chill in her very soul, and the morning joy fled before it's skittering claws as they chased down her spine.

Her home was in danger... and she had a promise to keep.

Steeling her courage, she looked over the village, committing it all to memory, the damage to the walls and the forest beyond in particular.

But the clue she most desired was not to be found...

There was no evidence as to the aggressor, nor even sign of defense by the village itself, a flaw in her sight, but nonetheless, she made the effort to look.

Hokage-jiji would hopefully be able to fill in that blank himself, if nothing else, the potential threat to the walls would be something he would need to hear about.

Their home was in one of the few tall buildings left standing in the vision... though she wondered if that was only because it was where she stood, but whatever the reason, it gave her a wide view, encompassing almost half of the village, and a fair portion of the monument itself.

The vision didn't last long though... barely even a few seconds, but it would have to do.

She sat down on the rail and sighed, annoyed that what she could offer in the way of assistance would be so limited... if it could even be trusted at all... but accepting that that was the nature of such things.

"Please tell Hokage-sama that I need to speak with him... privately," Kirlia asked, sending the thought skyward, to where she could feel a pair of ninja, presumably there to protect them from any contestants who might feel the urge to prune the competition a bit early.

The surprise she felt from the pair brought a small smile to her face, and the jumbled sensations of agreement only widened the expression, as she could easily imagine them responding verbally.

Apparently they had been informed of her telepathic nature, if not how to reply concisely.

"Thank you," Kirlia added, as she felt one of them start to move away.

Shaking loose the melancholy of the morning so far, Kirlia turned her thoughts to Naruto...

Part of her was thankful that he hadn't woken up and come out to check on her yet... but he would be soon, if his recent habit held without her morning greeting to the sun, and the feedback he felt from it...

He would certainly be curious if he noticed she had skipped it... and he seemed to enjoy waking up to the sensation...

What to do?

"Ah!" Kirlia realized, rushing to the kitchen and throwing open the fridge with a grin. "Breakfast in bed!"

Naruto was a great partner, and she didn't like lying to him ever... but she would admit that she would be much happier if he never asked about the visions... or even suspected she had them.

It would be easier that way... at least until she learned to control them properly.

"Thirteen, sixteen, and seventeen," Kakashi stated, sweeping a high kick at his opponent's face.

Naruto swept a forearm block into the path, leaning into the force of the blow to help him maintain his balance and stepping into his sensei's guard to fire a quick jab at the man's gut.

Kakashi spun in the opposite direction, slipping away from the strike, planting his kicking foot and driving the other up into his student, sending the boy into the air easily.

He watched dispassionately as Naruto crashed back into the ground... Not that he stayed there long.

"Did you forget what I told you?" Kakashi asked warningly, catching the next launched fist and pulling, grabbing Naruto's hair with his free hand and driving the boy's face into the earth roughly. "This isn't just about the fighting, remember?"

"Yeah yeah..." Naruto groaned, pushing back to his hands and knees and rubbing at his now bloody nose. "Answer when ya ask, or you kick my ass..."

"Then answer: Thirteen, sixteen, and seventeen," Kakashi commanded, sliding into his stance. "And I suggest you hurry..."

"Gah! Gimme a sec!" Naruto shouted, evading his sensei's punch by the barest of margins, firing a wild kick at the man as he wheeled away, face screwed in concentration.

"Number thirteen is... He's watching a lady leaving a shop with her kid an' some groceries," Naruto explained, as he went on the offensive. "Seventeen is watchin' the main gate, an' nothin' much is happening ther-Hey!"

Kakashi nodded in response to the answers, blocking Naruto's punch-kick-punch-leap-axekick combo, grabbing the boy's leg and tossing him away, though the agile boy landed on his feet rather easily.

"And number sixteen?" He asked, continuing their exchange with a combo of his own, holding his abilities down to what might be expected of a genin.

"He's off watchin' Sakura-chan work," Naruto replied, blocking, dodging and countering with all of his skill. "She's stuck with that weapon girl from Bushy Brow's team, and that blue guy."

"I see... Kirlia?" Kakashi pressed on, glancing towards the pokemon, who was practicing as well, specifically, in using her Thunder Wave, while maneuvering a number of kunai via Confusion, and maintaining the mental connection between Naruto, herself, and the score of clones Kakashi had ordered Naruto to send into the village.

"Sixteen is actually spying on the academy, and currently watching Konohamaru and his friends spar as part of their class taijutsu lesson," Kirlia corrected. "Sakura is being watched by number fifteen, but what he reported is accurate, as were the others."

"Dammit," Naruto cursed.

"Two out of three isn't bad," Kakashi complimented. "But the penalty must still be assessed."

A burst of speed had Naruto's guard ripped wide open, and an open palm strike took advantage of that fact, landing a precise strike just below the boy's sternum, blasting him backwards and to the ground, where he lay in the dirt, trying desperately to breath with a spasming diaphragm.

Kakashi waited while Naruto recovered, confident that the penalty would be... inspiring, but not overly dangerous... Even if it felt like dying for a little while.

Naruto struggled to his feet even before his breath steadied, glaring at his teacher.

"Shall we continue then?" Kakashi asked brightly, smiling even wider when Naruto came on with a flurry of blows. "All right then... Six, nine, and twenty."

The jounin had devised this practice as a means to help Naruto harness his combat worthy shadowclones more effectively, taking advantage of Kirlia's aid to help each know what the others were thinking and doing...

If it worked, Naruto might end up with the ability to out think even a genius like a Nara, or the ability to prepare traps and ambushes on the fly, or any number of similar things, without the waste of having to create and dispel clones to pass around the ideas.

Of course, the difficulty would be the question of whether such a constant connection was even viable, but Kirlia didn't object, so it probably was...

That being the case, he just needed Naruto to learn to monitor the clones' thoughts on an automatic, or optimally an unconscious, level.

With luck, it would also serve to help Kirlia and Naruto synchronize a bit better in combat as well, so as not to have a repeat of the fiasco with Shino's insects...

Kakashi shrugged slightly as he pushed the thoughts away.

If nothing else, the brat still needed a bit of polish on his taijutsu, and sparring could only help in that regard.

Maybe he actually was a decent sensei... How many others could cram so much learning into a day of beating their students senseless?

"Hate puppets. Hate puppeteers. Hate Suna!" Tenten growled, wringing out her surprisingly long hair as she and her cleaning team sat alongside the river flowing through the village.

"Hate dog boys," Sakura added, though her own voice was more exasperated than angry.

"Hate useless complaints," Ao muttered in reply, leaning against a sun warmed tree, his eyes closed against both the sun's glare and the occasional stares of passerby.

The temporary team had spent most of the morning swimming through the village river, collecting debris ranging from dead plant matter, to lost weaponry, to generic garbage, and this was their first break of the day.

"It's only useless if it's only complaining," Tenten shot back, turning a dark look on the blue skinned boy. "Gimme another match against that doll playing pansy and I'll beat him until his own mother can't recognize him! Can you say the same about your fight against Ino?"

"I have already assessed and addressed my mistake against her," Ao answered, his voiced laced with something akin to annoyed embarrassment. "I made a faulty assumption and paid for it... but then again, I'm not the only one to do so, eh? For you see, Kankuro's mother has been dead for more than a decade."

The last part of that statement his the orphaned girl like a slap in the face, but faded quickly against her own stubborn anger. "Fine! His father then, or do you have some smartass comment about him being dead too?"

"If the Kazekage had died, I would hope you Konoha ninja would be among the first to know," Ao commented drily. "You are allies afterall."

Tenten sent a questioning look at Sakura, who nodded in confirmation, and the brunette scowled back at the Naka ninja.

She couldn't help but see the worst parts of her own teammate in the foreigner's tone, the dismissive disdain Neji reserved for enemies, and occasionally Lee... But at least the Hyuuga had a reason for his attitude, and the occasional good day, when he was almost nice.

"Oh dear, I think I hurt her feelings," Ao remarked sarcastically. "What ever shall I do?"

"You can start by shutting up!" Sakura shot back, the temper she had been known for in the academy rising to the forefront in defense of her fellow Leaf ninja.

"Technically, I would have to start by giving a damn about what some half-assed human crossbow felt in the first place," Ao replied with an evil smile, which looked all too comfortable on his sharp featured face.

In a blink, almost faster than Sakura could register, Tenten had attacked, drawing a kunai from the pouch at her hip and driving it at her antagonist.

Ao was equal to the task of evading though, and grabbed onto the tree trunk with his palms, curling his body up and away from the strike to catch onto a branch above with his feet, freeing his hands to counter.

By the time Sakura had gained her feet, the two more experienced genin had ended the clash, Tenten's wounding slash a complete miss, and Ao's newly summoned wakizashi laid across the back of her neck.

The imperiled girl dispersed into smoke, leaving one of the many bags of detritus they had collected in her place, and Ao withdrew his weapon, relinquishing his inverted position to land on his feet, almost perfectly balanced and watchful as the girl rose from the pile of garbage she'd Kawarimi'd to.

"Kawarimi and kunai, how very... mediocre," the Naka-nin taunted. "And this from the only ninja in the preliminaries to utilize fuinjutsu... aside from myself of course."

"I suppose there's no room for scrolls in that outfit of yours, hmm?" He continued, eying the utilitarian swimsuit the girls wore for this task. "Or is it just that the water would render them as useless as you are?"

He was forced to slap the girl's flawlessly aimed kunai from the air, and summon forth a second blade of his own to block her charging follow up, grinning into her glare across their locked blades.

"Touched a nerve, did I?" Ao taunted, pushing the girl away and dodging back himself to evade a water spout shot from Sakura. "Store bought scrolls and second-rate sealing? No wonder you only used nothing but the basic sealing array!"

"You... It's the only one I can make!" Tenten roared, driving in once more, pushing through Sakura's jutsu and using it's force to add to her own. "And if that's all I have, then I'll make it work!"

Ao dodged the wild stab, dropping his blades to grab the girl's leading wrist and spin, slamming her back against the tree and pinning her there with his second hand on her throat.

Instantly, her free hand came up to wrap around his wrist, squeezing tight and drawing a grunt from him as he realized that the kunoichi had considerable strength in her.

His appreciation grew as she began to fight his grip on her own wrist, and he realized that he had no chance to hold her for long... But then, it was never really his plan to do so.

"What would you give... to learn the art as I did?" He asked seriously, enticingly, locking her brown eyes with his own pale blue orbs.

"What?" Tenten asked breathlessly, from surprise rather than strangulation.

"Fuinjutsu is an art... and among my kin, somewhat of a tradition," Ao explained. "We learn the symbology as babes in arms, the puzzles we piece together , the games we play... but we are not a prolific race, and to look at one's own art grows tiresome after a time..."

"It was clear to me, that you had the interest, and now I believe you have the passion to learn... So now, as is my right, and duty, I make the offer: What would you give to learn the art of fuinjutsu as my kindred have practiced it for so many decades?"

Tenten's eyes were huge at the implications of the offer... to learn what she'd been trying so hard to, lessons even her sensei seemed unable to aid her in.

But her eyes turned shrewd quickly, as suspicion rose in her mind easily, especially after the viciousness of his taunts and the fight they'd just finished.

"What were you planning to ask for?" Tenten asked, turning the question back on him.

"Your first born child," Ao answered quickly, eagerly, baring his teeth in a hungry grin.

"As if!" Tenten shouted into his face, tearing his hand from her throat and bringing her knee up into his gut. Hard.

The blue boy folded easily, hitting the ground with a groan, which shifted into chuckling laughter as she walked away in a huff.

"Sorry, sorry, I just always wanted to say that," Ao laughed, reclaiming his seat against the tree and seeming more like Lee than Neji for a brief moment. "Rest assured, your future fledglings are perfectly safe from even an 'Oni' such as myself."

"Hmph, as if I'll even bother," Tenten scoffed. "I plan to be a legendary kunoichi like Tsunade-sama, not some kind of... mother."

"Then I wish you better luck than she bears," Ao replied seriously. "But I wouldn't be too hasty in your decision. I imagine a family of fuinjutsu specialists would make a valuable clan in a village like this..."

"You're still acting like I'm going to take you up on that stupid offer," Tenten said, crossing her arms and glaring at him.

"Because you will... Especially since the price can only be paid if you do," Ao replied. "To skip the annoying bargaining I'm supposed to waste time with: At one point in the future, one of my kin will demand a number of your family's fuinjutsu formula, five, to be precise."

"Why?" Tenten asked in puzzlement. "I thought you said your family's been doing this stuff forever?"

"To learn more of course," Ao answered with a half shrug, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. "As I said, you will learn as I did, and in the end, your methods may differ from ours... That which does not grow will stagnate, and deciphering your clan's style will provide an opportunity for our own growth as well... assuming you're worthy of the offer anyway."

"Then... You're being generous just to be selfish?" Sakura asked curiously.

"Such disparity is the way of ninja life, is it not?" Ao replied, glancing at the pink haired girl before returning his gaze, and a challenging leer towards Tenten. "So... do you accept?"

"Not that I mind or nothin', but why are we walkin' around so much today?" Naruto asked. "I mean, you were in some kinda hurry just yesterday..."

"Yesterday was yesterday, and today is today," Kirlia replied, nodding wisely from her perch on her partner's shoulder. "It's nice to just wander around once in a while... right?"

"Well, yeah, but we just did this a week ago," Naruto grouched. "When we showed Karin the sights, remember?"

Kirlia hid a grimace at the reminder, which poked a Steelix sized hole in her excuse for exploring... and she couldn't really admit that she was trying to find oracular clues.

"I guess I'm just... restless," Kirlia claimed, rubbing her anchoring hand through Naruto's hair idly.

"I know what ya mean... It's like there's something in the air, or the water, or somethin'," Naruto remarked, surprising her. "But maybe it's just pre-fight jitters," he added with a nervous chuckle.

"Pretty bad if you're getting cold feet already," Kirlia teased. "But at least you have a few weeks to get over it."

"Cold feet? Me? Hah!" Naruto scoffed, bravado filling his words. "The only way I'd have cold feet is if Haku-chan was in the finals with me!"

"Oh really?" Kirlia remarked, a sly smile on her face. "Already looking forward to seeing Haku-chan again?" What would Sakura say!?"

"Dunno..." Naruto replied thoughtfully. "But I bet she's even stronger now... Maybe I should get some boots or somethin' before I call her out for a spar though... I mean, she's gotta have some even more awesome moves now, fighting that Dodo guy and his goons."

Kirlia giggled at his complete cluelessness, not entirely surprised that her implication went over his head.

It was actually comforting in a way, to know that that was one future event that wasn't going to sneak up and bite her in the butt any time soon...

Assuming he didn't manage to rush headlong into something like that entirely unknowing.

As Naruto meandered aimlessly, Kirlia ran her hand though his hair, swaying on his shoulder with each step.

She was almost afraid of the day those feelings awoke within him... the first time he felt true love... the first time that most powerful of emotions exploded through their shared consciousness.

So much would change that day...

Dear Arceus, or lust! The burning, itching, possessive passion of unabridged desire...

She shivered slightly, bringing her free hand up to rub at the phantom tingle in her horns, almost convinced that she could already feel the potent sensation flowing through them.

As tiny fingers rubbed the vibrating red sensory organs, Kirlia's eyes narrowed.

There was no 'almost' about it, she could feel the projected perversion as clear as day!

That... that... that lecher! It was his fault these worries had been put in her mind!

Red eyes flashing dangerously, Kirlia glanced around, opening herself more fully to the sensation in an attempt to trace it's source... realizing that in their undirected meandering, they had approached one of the village's many public hotsprings.

"Naruto... We have a good deed to do..." She declared vindictively. "A pervert is spying on these people!"

Naruto reluctantly agreed, thankful that he'd stopped using his own morally ambiguous Oiroke no jutsu...Not that it'd have been of much use in real combat anyway.

Despite appearances, and the occasional accusation to the contrary, Naruto was not a pervert.

He just happened to create the ultimate perverted anti-pervert technique, in part because of a completely well considered belief that the best way to practice the Henge was to transform into someone as far from himself as possible.

Short became tall, boy became girl, cropped spikes became a long flowing mane, bound in a twintail style... Of course, the body itself came mostly from the kunoichi that he'd ticked off a few months prior, when he got caught trying to turn a hotspring into the worlds biggest bowl of ramen.

He realized it's potential only after showing it off to his academy sensei, so excited about finally getting it right that he forgot to visualize new clothes as well.

The mature woman's body that suddenly filled his old t-shirt and shorts had a rather sudden impact on the elderly chunin, even if he never did mention it again.

Meanwhile, Naruto spent nearly two days hidden in his room, waiting to be arrested for teacher-cide.

His thoughts distracted by the development of his first original jutsu, his body followed the direction Kirlia pointed out for their deviant target.

A leap brought him to the roof of the entry hall, and a second sent him vaulting across the open baths towards the pervert.

Below, many eyes traced his progress, filled as the spring was with a mid-afternoon medical therapy session for a number of Konoha's elderly and infirm.

The vaunted reputation of hotspring healing became more than mere myth with the addition of a little medical chakra to the dissolved minerals.

The blonde landed his flying attack with the roar of wind, shaking the bushes around the onsen's perimeter wildly.

"Dammit! Which way?" Naruto shouted, crashing about in search of his missing enemy.

"That way! And he's moving fast!" Kirlia shouted widely including the people around them in her announcement.

"No one's faster than us! Interception teleport!" Naruto shouted, a flash of blue bursting over the wall... and more importantly, through the tiny hole bored in it.

"Looks like that old toad is back in town, eh?" One of the elderly women cackled from her lounged position against the wall. "Can't say as I blame him though, best view in town right here!"

"Twenty years ago maybe, you old prune," her companion countered, jabbing the first with a sharp elbow and inciting a debate between the two.

The nearby medic shuddered as he turned his mind far from the women around him and focused more fully on the water infusion jutsu, cursing himself for volunteering for the deceptively named 'Onsen Duty'.

Naruto and Kirlia appeared at their destination, the roof of the nearest hot spring, poised to intercept the onrushing ninja, a huge old man with lots of white hair and an expression of extraordinary surprise.

"Gotcha, pervert!" Kirlia cheered, eyes and fingers sparking as she summoned electricity to hand.

"Futon: Reppusho!" Naruto shouted, bringing both palms forward to blast the man with wind.

The old man smirked, bringing both arms forward defensively, pausing midstep for the barest of seconds the charge his feet and legs with chakra, before leaping into, and through the wall of wind.

Kirlia smiled as she sent the twin lengths of lightning whipping through the air, spinning like bolas for the spot he would land.

"Not bad brats..." the old man called, landing in a crouch behind a wall of earth that sprouted seallessly in time with his arrival, dispersing the Thunder Waves harmlessly. "But not nearly good enough!"

"Old man, you got no idea who you're messing with!" Naruto called threateningly.

"You got some spunk to say that to me of all people," his opponent replied, standing to his full height to lean on the edge of the wall and leer at the pair. "Seriously, do you even know who I am?"

"You? You're nobody," Kirlia replied with a smile. "Just a lump of mud trying to distract us while the real one gets away... That way, Naruto!"

"Right!" The boy replied, leaping away in pursuit of the fleeing Jiraiya and away from the Earth Clone.

"Well... That could have gone better," The remotely controlled clone muttered, in tandem with the real Jiraiya, before the Sannin allowed it to dissolve into a pile of dirt.

Jiraiya couldn't help but grin a little as he considered the impromptu test his absentee godson had initiated... a not entirely unpleasant idea, to be honest.

Marshaling his focus, Jiraiya did one of the many things in which he excelled: Passed off one hell of a lie.

So fast as to be almost simultaneous, he summoned a shadowclone, and then used shunshin to beat feet in different directions, with the real one ending up on the far side of the city, well outside of any sensor's range.

"Nice try kiddies, but the great Jiraiya's research falls to no man!" The old sage chortled, making his way to the nearest hotspring in search of... inspiration.

"I was under the impression that you were here to help me," Neji said with sour sarcasm. "But do tell me if I was mistaken, I would not wish to take away from your own studies."

He had been standing, staring and waiting for far longer than he should have, waiting for the end of their supposed fifteen minute break in their training, watching her become more and more engrossed in that scroll of hers.

"Just one more minute..." Tenten muttered absently.

Neji scowled. She was usually so punctual.

"I have already been waiting for four minutes," Neji informed her sternly. "Need I remind you of how imperative it is that I perfect this jutsu before the finals?"

"And here I thought you were fated to win," Tenten replied with a frown, as she reluctantly surrendered her study, and her seat on Skarmory's back. "This stuff is just so... fascinating!"

Neji declined to comment, either to her comment about the scroll, or the slight against his destiny, instead taking his position in the center of their scarred clearing, falling into his stance and wordlessly demanding the assault to come by bringing his dojutsu into play.

Tenten complied, continuing her discussion despite Neji's disinterest, her many kunai flying in alongside the now airborne Skarmory's Swift, and Sneasel's darting Icy Winds.

"I always thought that storage seals were simple, I mean, they're everywhere afterall, but the individual components are anything but! Element transitioning, stabilizing, chakra dispersal, space-time bending components... even the emergency release failsafe, all separate pieces to one small seal!"

"I thought that was just the way they worked, but apparently without it, all my stuff would just vanish if the scroll got damaged enough... And that's not all either, there are other release criteria: time, impact, chakra infusion, a whole slew of them!"

"So a weapon that you threw would release more?" Neji remarked, dropping from his first kaiten and glowering at the weapons scattered around him. "What good could that possibly do?"

"Not much... Unless the storage seal is linked to an inertia seal," Tenten replied with a savage smile. "Which I just so happen to have. I guess he didn't want to include a guide on seals without an example or two."

"I find it surprising... that you're willing to trust a gift from foreign filth so easily," Neji commented suspiciously.

"Who says I am?" Tenten countered. "I checked it against what I have though, the storage and explosion seals, and it all meshes... but I do plan to make sure Gai-sensei is around when I try making some new ones. He'd never let me live it down if my 'youthful' curiosity and 'burning' desire to improve got me hurt."

"Hmph," Neji grunted, agreeing wordlessly, coming to a stop for a second time in an even wider pile of broken blades.

"You'll be replacing those," Tenten warned him.

Neji just scowled at the metal scattered haphazardly at his feet.

"Too many are getting through," he decided. "They should be stopped, or deflected, not broken and dropped... Especially not this close to me," he added, flipping a halved kunai away with one foot.

"If you say so," Tenten muttered, catching the chunk of metal and eyeing the break forlornly.

"Neji!"

The roar preceded, barely, a green blur, which charged past the girl and stopped before Neji with enough force to blow the boy's hair back... and send a number of the broken kunai rolling across the crater he stood in.

"You, my most sneaky of rivals, owe me an explanation!" Lee declared, one accusing finger close enough to flick the Hyuuga's nose, had that been Lee's intention.

His expression of hurt anger made that far from likely though.

"I don't see how I owe you any such thing," Neji declared, reactivating his byakugan with a pulse of chakra. "But if you're looking for yet another fight-"

"No!" Lee interrupted forcefully, the shock of Lee turning down a chance to spar forcing the Hyuuga into silence, and allowing the green genin the opportunity to grab him by the shoulders, shaking him fiercely as twin waterfalls trailed from his eyes.

"You would truly try to deceive me again, even now?" Lee wept. "Have you no shame? No moral fiber? Has the evil of cool hipness tarnished the youthful passion within you so greatly!?"

Sneasel, who had been eagerly awaiting a fight from the moment Lee entered, dropped it's claws from at ready, and into the dirt at that comment, expression slack at the sheer insensibility of the allegations being leveled.

"Lee... Lee... LEE!" Tenten shouted, grabbing her less sane teammate and ripping him free from Neji, spinning him to face herself and breaking through the veil of his debatably manly tears. "Why don't you explain what the heck you're talking about before making anymore accusations, okay?"

"Yosh!" Lee announced, bringing his fist up before him, and nearly uppercutting the girl as she wisely dove backwards. "Then explain I shall! For you too should know of our teammate's shameful duplicity!"

"It began this morning, with my usual morning jog, merely a warmup today, no more than ten miles... when what did my youthful eyes behold? My newest, and more honorable," Lee added with a strangely sharp look at Neji, "rival!"

"It being a glorious day for a spar, of course I challenged him... and do you know what happened?" Lee asked, clasping Tenten's hands in his own and looking into the girl's eyes expectantly.

"You... won?" She guessed, trying hard not to wince at the bone bruising force he unconsciously displayed.

"You were crushed," stated Neji simply, as if such an outcome was inevitable.

His tone earned another 'look'.

"He declined!" Lee roared, releasing Tenten and stalking away to the treeline and back, tense energy begging for release. "And do you know why?"

"Because he has not yet had time to overcome his vulnerability!" Lee announced almost immediately.

"Well, it's only been... Nine days? So that's hardly surprising," Tenten remarked.

"You knew this as well?" Lee gasped theatrically. "Even you, Lovely Tenten would conspire with the unyouthful Neji in such foul treachery..."

"What? No, no way!" Tenten argued, trying to forestall the manly tears and rants of improvement that were never far away.

"It matters not! For it is as the youthful Shugorei said: It would take a miracle beyond even the majesty of hard work to overcome such a deficit in combative prowess!" Lee declared boldly. "Let alone to develop enough so as to overcome an obstacle such as yourself, Neji Hyuuga!"

"And as I said," Neji put in with a dismissive shrug. "You are fated to lose to me, now and always. You simply cannot fight your destiny."

'Yes! Time and again you have proven the victor in our battles," Lee agreed eagerly. "Because, in my foolishness, I challenged you, day after day, coming at you with every technique and secret in my arsenal, save those which I was sworn to withhold!"

His expression darkened, drawn eyebrows and fierce frown revealing that Lee could actually be intimidating when he so chose. "And day after day, you learned, revealing nothing of yourself, taking me for the fool I was..."

"But no more!" Lee declared, bright and joyous once more, roaring his proclamation to the skies above. "No more will I reveal more to you than I must, before it is ready, and no more shall I challenge you before I am certain that victory is in my grasp!"

Lee displayed a fist clenched tightly, a squeaking protest from the bandages wound around his hand and fingers, as he looked to Neji with a positively eager glint in his eye. "What say you to that, oh first of my rivals?"

Neji blinked laconically, but remained silent, cool and unconcerned by the threat in his teammate's words.

"Ahh! I see my cleverness has stolen your tongue," Lee decided with an enigmatic giggle. "Learn well the merits of hard work, my rival, for when next we battle, you shall see the full measure of my own!"

With that, Lee was gone, dashing past Neji and presumably off to train with new fervor, eager to overcome the handicap of Neji's superior skill.

"Exactly what was that all about?" the prodigy wondered aloud, having ignored the bulk of Lee's rambling rant.

"I think he's decided that the only reason you keep accepting his challenges is so you can stay ahead of him... so he decided he's going to stop challenging you at all, at least until he thinks he has a real good chance of winning," Tenten explained.

"And... he thinks that this is some nefarious plot of my concoction?" Neji wondered, one thin eyebrow arched, and a smug smirk on his face.

"That or he's drunk again," she added with a nod and shrug. "But he didn't run into a tree on his way out, so I don't think so..."

For all it's silence, that shrug was familiar. It practically said all on it's own 'It's Lee, what can you do?'

"Hm, well, let us enjoy the peace while it lasts," Neji decided. "And hope this resolution persists."

The cold boy held no enjoyment for the repetitious spars which he had been all but obligated to accept, but perhaps they would become less tedious in the future, if only because they would be rarer.

"Ty-ty-ty... Tyrogue? Gue? Tyro..." The scuffle pokemon panted, finally reaching the clearing. Lee was fast, Arceus dammit!

"Sneas." Neji's partner replied with a huff, jerking one clawed finger towards where Lee had exited.

"...Tyyy." The little Tyrogue blew out a heavy breath, scrubbed it's face with his palms and took off in a tired lope into the woods after Lee.

"Is this all you got, kid?" Jiraiya taunted, leaping across the rooftops backwards, hands tucked behind his head lazily, completely blind to, and unconcerned with, whatever obstacles might appear in his path.

Not he ever so much as stumbled, no matter what he came across.

"Just wait you ol' perv!" Naruto growled, chasing after on all fours, alone, aside from Kirlia, after having learned the uselessness of sending shadowclones after this guy. "You can't run forever!"

The shadowclone just leered back, silently laughing to itself.

The brat was surprisingly good, impossibly so when it came to staying on his trail... probably because of the pokemon clinging to his back, those sharp red eyes of hers seemed to be measuring him on a level he didn't fully understand.

It was rather impressive, for a genin to track a guy who made a habit of evading everything from jounin through Kage... usually.

He shoved the thoughts of those kunoichi he allowed to catch him away as Kirlia's face scrunched up in anger, and she lit up once again, the third time they'd tried using teleport to out maneuver him... a useless effort, but nostalgic in a way.

Jiraiya landed right where the pokemon had expected, lashing out with electricity again, but he was already gone pushing away instantly with an expression of chakra rather than muscle, flipping upside down as he spun away to face the girlish pokemon.

"This old trick again? Kid, do you have anything else to throw at me? I'm getting bored over here!" He called after them, grinning dismissively in the face of the orb of purple light which sparked to life between Kirlia's palms an instant before she launched it.

"Musei Sakebi!"

A blast of pure psychic energy slammed into Jiraiya from directly below, shattering the shadowclone's attempt to evade, and exposing the last of Naruto's earlier shadowclones, which had abandoned a planned sneak attack after seeing the bulk of it's comrades roasted by a fireball blast.

The clone gave it's false life in the effort, funneling it's very existence into the disorienting jutsu, but giving Kirlia's attack the opening it needed.

Naruto braced himself for a counter, or to intercept the old man's fall, if he really was down for the count.

But the smoke from Kirlia's Psyshock cleared to reveal... nothing.

"Shadowclone? But when?" Kirlia murmured, knowing that it was not a clone like the earlier earth bushin, it had possessed emotions... even it had mostly been flavors of amusement, annoyance, and that loathsome lust.

"Oh yeah," Naruto agreed with a toothy smile. "He's good... but now? Now it's personal! Kage Bushin no jutsu!"

Scores of clones appeared around him; on the rooftop, perched on the walls, even on the shoulders of other clones.

Every one of them shared his fervid expression, and every set of eyes latched onto the finger he stabbed into the air.

"No one tricks Naruto Uzumaki with his own jutsu!" He declared. "Now everyone... Find that pervy bastard!"

Naruto swept his arm down to point into the village itself, and a wave of orange sped from his position, zeroing in on every voyeuristic hotspot they could imagine.

Gazing after them, Naruto leaned against the crenelation as Kirlia hopped up beside him.

"You are actually enjoying this, aren't you?" Kirlia observed with clear amusement in her tone.

"...A li'l bit, yeah," Naruto admitted after a moment's thought. "The old guy's got some moves, and it' kinda reminds me of the old days... Chasing around town, ninja on my heels, good times..."

"Is it as fun from the other side?" Kirlia asked.

"Mostly," Naruto replied. "But it is a bit weird, being the responsible one for once..."

"Aww, Naruto-chan is growing up," Kirlia grinned, biting her tongue and patting the now glowering boy's head.

"Laugh it up shorty. Least I am growing," Naruto countered, sticking his own tongue out petulantly.

"...I'll get taller when I evolve..." Kirlia pouted, crossing her arms and looking away in a huff.

Naruto dropped a hand to her hair and rubbed comfortingly, privately glad to have won the exchange, mild though it was.

"Already?" Jiraiya reflected quietly, as the information from his clone filtered into his mind. "Brat's better than I thought... Not that it matters anymore," he added with a lecherous giggle.

His clone had bought him all the time he needed, leading the brat all over hell and half of Iwa, allowing the prince of perverts to stake out a new vista.

"Let's see... brat's fast, and has tons of stamina." "Oh yeah, just a little more..." "But that's to be expected, knowing Kushina and Minato... Wind and psychic jutsu, at least one of each, and-" Hot damn! "the Kage Bushin..." Jiraiya reasoned, analyzing the events of his clone's escapade as he continued his dubious research. "Kid's got potential, even if it still needs a lot of polishing..."

"Pokemon seems to use Psychic and Electric, and teleport, so probably a Psychic type... and for some reason, looks like a little girl..."

The aged author sat away from his peeping with a sigh, as he thought about the pokemon, the sheer memory of the childlike creature making him uncomfortable.

Pervert though he might be, Jiraiya of the Sannin still had some standards, and one of the fastest ways to discourage his research was the presence of children.

Mothers on the other hand...

"Mood restored," Jiraiya declared quietly, returning to his peeping. "Why hello there... How would you lovely ladies like to star in my next book?"

The memory of the childlike pokemon didn't do nearly as much to discourage his habits as the presence of a real one.

"Itty bitty, teeny weenie, hot milf in a string bikini," he chanted to himself, giggling wickedly to himself.

Date: XXXX-XX-XX

Personal log; Entry 5, Observation Day 9

The cannibalism and mutations have continued unabated, as has the rejection of every form of sustenance I have attempted to introduce.

Of notable exception were the unafflicted female kikaichu introduced in hopes of breeding more stable specimens, which were summarily slain and partially consumed prior to rejection.

I can only assume the cause of said rejection was the lack of preexisting corruption, as those cannibalized from among the quarantined kikaichu leave little to no discarded matter.

It is my current belief that this incident is evidence of further aggression on the part of the mutates, which seems to have reached a level sufficient to suppress or even eliminate the instinct to pass on one's genes inherent in nearly all creatures.

That the mutates have survived far beyond a kikaichu's natural lifespan, could relate to this issue, but also raises a number of concerns for the long term viability of this experiment.

I must remember to look into secondary reproductive options, such as artificial insemination.

It should also be considered that these kikaichu may no longer be capable of recognizing their kin, as the smallest of mutates has become an order of magnitude larger than even the largest of my kikaichu queens, with the foremost mutate having reached a length of roughly six (6) centimeters, and a girth approximately one third that.

While privately, I am rather thankful that a kikaichu of this size is not within my body, intellectually, I must wonder at the sheer scale of this specimen.

An individual kikaichu in my swarm possesses dimensions of seven (7) millimeters by three (3) millimeters, thus the preeminent mutate demonstrates an increase of almost eight hundred percent.

Structurally, such an increase should not be possible, particularly due to their continued refusal of sustenance.

The number of kikaichu mutates consumed thus far would not, could not, support this degree of growth in a single specimen, let alone the several similar examples I currently possess.

This situation leads me to suspect chakra as the catalyst, rather than the training ground, though the mechanics of such a permanent alteration continue to elude me.

Research into the Forest of Death, both within the village libraries and my own clan's archives has proven interesting, but fruitless, for while there are a distressingly large number of advisements in regards to the training ground itself, none suggest a particular reactivity towards either kikaichu or Aburame.

However, given the timing involved, and my suspicions as to the condition's relation to chakra, it must now be considered that the trigger is human, most probably related to the combat, rather than simple presence, within the Forest of Death.

This by necessity directs suspicion towards those I battled in the recent past, notably those whom my kikaichu came into direct contact with from the moment I entered the forest, until my eventual defeat at the hands of Uzumaki-san.

Further pursuit of this line of inquiry will prove difficult, due to the absence of most of those who died or left the village following the end of the second phase, but I must exhaust all avenues if I am to solve this puzzle for the benefit of the clan.

Primary Analyst: Shino Aburame

Secondary Analyst: N/A

Jiraiya had known about his silent observer for nearly ten seconds, a fair amount of time for a ninja preparing for confrontation, and in fact, had already planned out his 'failure to escape' strategy, which would begin with him crashing through the flimsy wall and into the pool full of bathing beauties... who would then proceed to vigorously punish him...

Not that their fists and feet could possibly do a damn thing against a ninja of his caliber, but the attempts did such wonderful things with their bountiful breasts, and the kicks...

He giggled at the thought of the treasures soon to be on display.

But first... he would need his little spy to fulfill their role in his production...

One little shriek of anger, that's all he needed...

Unless it's one of those white knight types, or a fellow fan of the female form... Bah, he'd just run in anyway, and drag the little bastard with him... Teach them to interrupt his research.

He snickered evilly at that thought.

One thing he didn't plan for was the quiet poof of a shadowclone dispelling.

So it reasonably took a moment, and the familiar flash of blue, to remind him of one white knight problem he thought he'd escaped long before.

But the Sannin was old and wily, and by the time the light faded, he was already nowhere in sight.

Or at least, that was the plan.

"You can't hide from us, old man," Naruto declared. "So ya might as well get to runnin', or just stay there and accept what ya got comin' to ya."

"Pretty cocky for some nobody punk," Jiraiya taunted, banking on the invisibility jutsu he'd created as a genin, and had only improved upon over the years.

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki," the boy countered fiercely, dragging a kunai from his pouch and flipping it into the air. "Partner of Kirlia, and future Hokage of Konohagakure. Remember it! Reppusho!"

The tumbling kunai froze in midair as it fell orienting it on the pervert and flying forward of it's own accord, fired by Kirlia's Confusion, accelerated by Naruto's Gale Palm.

Jiraiya shifted out of the line of fire quickly, leaving the blade to slam into the wall behind him with an echoing bang.

His eyes narrowed shrewdly as he considered the implications of the weapon's aim, center of mass, either the boy really wanted to hurt him... or whatever method they used to track him wasn't precise enough to allow for pinpoint accuracy.

The Sannin tore the weapon free, allowing his jutsu to fall as he did.

"You know," he began, testing the kunai's edge against his thumb, one eyebrow raising in appreciation as the skin split easily. "I once hid from Sarutobi-sensei for two weeks with the help of that jutsu."

"Saru-" Naruto repeated, his mind skipping a beat before his sense returned. "Yeah right. Now tell me the truth: Who the hell are you? And it better be good!"

Naruto's stance slid into something much more dangerous as he drew more kunai, the pokemon shifting into her own strange form, arms bent and palms poised together at her stomach.

Jiraiya smiled broadly, he always did love a good prompting.

"Who am I, you ask?" He called brazenly, slapping his bloodied hand to the ground. "Who am I?!"

"Who am I?!" A loud, and horribly familiar voice called out above the hotspring.

A massive column of smoke burst from the far side of the onsen's wall, and more than one occupant screamed, as the cautious worry inspired by the earlier bang bloomed into full indignant anger.

THMM! Thmm! Ctsh! Ctsh! Thmm! Thmm! Ctsh! Ctsh!

The first pulse blasted the smoke away, clearing it to reveal the notorious ninja, scourge of beautiful women everywhere.

The water danced to the beat of the sonic assault from the man's pokemon, accompanied by the cymbal shield slams of his giant summon.

Jiraiya craned his neck as he posed in what he believed to be a most gallant fashion, taking one last longing look towards the well formed backsides as they fled the area.

"Oh well... they'd have caught me soon enough I suppose," he thought sadly.

Naruto and Kirlia both gave ground before the billowing smoke, the girlish pokemon separating the new sensations into three: The excited and somewhat sorrowful pervert, an eager and agitated presence above the man, and one massive presence below, steeped in humble embarrassment.

THMM! Thmm! Ctsh! Ctsh! Thmm! Thmm! Ctsh! Ctsh!

The smoke blew away, revealing the strange man, standing upon an enormous toad, which bore a large forked club and an equally sized metal shield, the two meeting at a regular rhythm to create a loudly resonating crash.

Jiraiya's legs were spread, one foot on the toad's eye ridge, one palm pointing at his pursuers, the other raised above him, bearing the blue bodied, toad-like, pokemon, from which the rest of the cacophony originated... at least until the large man himself added to it.

"From the north, the south, the east and the west! Women swoon, and men raise their voices in praise!"

"Rejoice, young ninja, for you have the honor of standing in the presence of a legend! The Toad Sage of Mount Myobokuzan! The Hero who stood against Hanzo the Salamander and lived to tell the tail! Yes, boy, it is I! Jiraiya of the Sannin!"

"One of the Sannin... is a pervert," Naruto muttered in astonishment.

"I don't remember that being mentioned in the textbooks," Kirlia agreed.

"First Orochimaru, and now this," Naruto bemoaned theatrically. "I'm almost afraid to find out what kinda nutjob Tsunade turned out to be."

"It's not so bad really," the large toad put in gently, or as gently as a building sized amphibian could, "The Great Toad Sage declared him to be pervy, so of course he must be so."

"That's not really the way it works Gamaken," Jiraiya grouched sourly. "And did you really have to tell them that?"

"Forgive me for insisting, but it is still better to be named as singularly pervy, than to be singularly graceless," the toad argued politely, and looking sheepish as he did so, rocking from foot to foot. "Even if it was an honor to be called before the Great Sage..."

"Well, now you can add tactless to that, so bravo," Jiraiya replied sarcastically, dropping from the high head to land gracefully before the genin pair, dropping Seismitoad beside him after he landed.

"Ah well, not like it's a big secret anyway," the large man sighed. "Go on back, I'll deal with the kiddies myself."

"Of course, Jiraiya-san. Please call upon me if ever you need my aid, graceless though it may be," The huge toad agreed with a ponderous bow and another burst of chakra smoke.

"Alright brat, brat-ette, you have my attention," Jiraiya continued on sternly, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall. "And after trying so hard to get it, I guess you got me interested, what the hell do you want?"

Naruto stared at the man for a few blinks before turning his gaze onto Kirlia.

"You... are a pervert!" She declared accusingly.

"Oh no. My secret is revealed. How shall I ever live with myself." Jiraiya replied, his tone drier than a Sunagakure sandstorm. "Kid, I've been a pervert since before you were a twinkle in your mother's eye, and probably before your mother was a twinkle in her mother's to boot. You don't really think forty-some-odd years of practiced perversion is gonna break due to some silly accusation, do you?"

"It is not silly! It's true!" Kirlia countered, stepping forward angrily at the dismissal.

"Well of course it is!" The old man laughed. "And if I were some civilian, I'd probably be a felon by now..."

His tone turned dangerously serious, as he locked eyes with the little pokemon.

"But I'm not. I'm a Sannin, one of the strongest ninja in this, or any other village; I survived the second and third shinobi world wars, training a Hokage-to-be in the process; I have an information network so widespread that if you give me an hour, I can tell you what each Kage had for breakfast and how many helpings; I am one of the last people in the world who bear the title of Sage in it's proper sense; I am the author of the most popular book series of all time; and I am the biggest goddamn pervert you're ever gonna meet!"

Naruto and Kirlia both fell back as the list of accomplishments, and the volume with which they were delivered, increased, the old man nearly shouting at the end as he posed in a ridiculously overdone battle stance.

"And do you know what all that means, brats?" He asked, quiet once more.

The pair shook their heads, awed, and a little afraid now.

"It means... That I'm allowed to be a little eccentric," Jiraiya declared with bold finality.

The old man relaxed his stance and massaged the muscles in his neck and shoulder, voice dropping back into a more conversational tone.

"Seriously, live through as much crap as we have, then you can start throwing accusations... There's a reason I'm the last truly loyal Sannin you know," he added, and though his voice was light, Kirlia could easily feel the weight of sadness and regret flowing off of him.

"We met the snake bastard already," Naruto admitted. "He was after the Te... Sasuke Uchiha, who's on our team... That's why you're here, ain't it?"

Jiraiya grimaced in displeasure.

"That is part of it," he admitted, eyeing the pair as if he had never really seen them before. "Am I to understand that you two are the ones who chased off Orochimaru?"

"N-not really," Naruto replied evasively. "It's... kinda complicated."

"Oh, I bet it was," Jiraiya agreed with a firm nod. "That old teammate of mine has a habit of bringing out the worst in people, and he's nine kinds of twisted."

"And you are a very devious pervert," Kirlia remarked privately, sharing a secret smile with Naruto, the only other one who heard her.

"So... you know how it is then?" Naruto asked hopefully.

"Oh yeah," Jiraiya confirmed. "And for what it's worth... I'm sorry. I know the Yondaime never wanted to do something like that, to you or anyone else."

Kirlia was almost as shocked by the declaration as Naruto, who seemed torn between terror and pride.

"But in all honesty," Jiraiya added, pushing off of the wall and walking over, dropping a hand to the boy's shoulder, squeezing it in a show of support. "I think he'd be proud of ya, kid."

Naruto looked up at the man, who gazed back with eyes gone soft with sincerity, and swallowed thickly as Kirlia moved close, taking his hand in hers, gaining comfort from the way it closed around her small fingers.

"Do... do you really think that?" Naruto asked, mentally staggered by the acknowledgment, indirect though it was, that his least wanted, and most important, task was appreciated by his idol.

"I know so," Jiraiya replied with a smile, his eyes going distant as he looked into distant memory. "I knew that boy better than anyone, even his... fiance," the man chuckled heartily. "Oh the stories I could tell... If Sarutobi-sensei wouldn't have my head for it."

"Can't ruin a legendary Hokage's reputation with the wrong kind of stories, eh?" He added with a wink.

"He wasn't a pervert too, was he?" Kirlia asked suspiciously, earning a look of shock from Naruto for even suggesting such a thing.

"Nah... but not for lack of trying!" Jiraiya admitted with a helpless shrug. "I swear, pretty guy like him would have made a hell of a wingman, bu~ut he never seemed to be interested. A shame, that, but things worked out pretty well for him eventually."

"Until Kyuubi," Naruto scowled, looking down at his gut.

"Until Kyuubi," Jiraiya agreed. "But that's just how things are. There hasn't been a Kage yet who's had a chance to die of natural causes."

"I'm still gonna be Hokage someday," Naruto insisted, fire sparking in his eyes at the perceived insinuation.

"Then I'll wish you all the luck in the world, brat," Jiraiya replied absently. "But speaking of the Hokage, I suppose it's due time I go meet with the old monkey... He's never too happy to be one of the last to hear I'm in town."

"And I bet having to hear about you peeping on the ladies doesn't help matters any," Naruto added with an evil smile.

"You'd think not," Jiraiya replied with an even more evil leer. "But he's usually too interested in how far along I am on the next Icha Icha book to care about where I do my research."

"Icha Icha!" Naruto and Kirlia repeated together, memories of the horrible book he'd seen during the bell test flashing through the boy's mind, quickly banished, though not so fast as to prevent his acute embarrassment.

"Ahh, I see you know my work," the amorous author bragged. "Another adoring fan, a bit young, but it's always best to learn these things early, right, you little hypocrite?"

"It's not like that!" Naruto protested. "It's all Kakashi-sensei's fault! He's always reading those damn books of his, and we had to pass his stupid test!"

"Excuses, excuses," Jiraiya replied dismissively, patting the boy on the head with far more force than necessary. "It's only natural for a boy your age to be curious... and far be it from me to deride a young ninja for being able to acquire such illicit literature. As a ninja, I should be congratulating you! In fact, I think I will! Bring them by sometime, and the Great Jiraiya will autograph them personally!"

"But enough of that, I'm off! See you around brat," The old man, decided, leaping away with enough force to tear the wind in his wake.

"I'm not like that you old pervy bastard!" Naruto shouted after him, and probably would have taken chase once again, had Kirlia not still been holding of his hand. "I don't read your crummy books, and I never will!"

Kirlia glared after the old man, his emotions already sparking with the spicy scent that had started the whole ordeal in the first place.

"Seis... Mi... TOAD!"

The frog-like pokemon leapt after it's partner, clearing Naruto's head by bare inches, seeming almost to be throwing itself after it's perverted partner.

Naruto and Kirlia watched in awe at the sheer distance Seismitoad cleared before gravity finally brought it back down to earth, landing in the middle of the street with the sound of a hundred drums falling of a cliff. (Bounce)

Faintly, at least in comparison to it's clarion crash, the cry of 'Toad!" repeated, as the creature took to the air once more.

It seemed that one way or another, the village would soon know of it's most boisterous son's return.

Naruto shook his head in amazement at the strangeness of both pokemon and ninja, pausing after a moment to place one palm against his stomach, as he pondered his own strangeness, and the assurances that the Sannin had offered.

"Naruto," Kirlia said, tucking herself in close to him, pulling her grasped hand around her in a partial hug. "I think we've wandered enough for one day..."

"Yeah... Alright." Naruto agreed, sending one last glower in the direction Jiraiya had fled. "Okay, home then? And food, definitely food." He muttered as a growl rumbled through his belly, strong enough to feel through his gripping hand.

"Food sounds very good right now," Kirlia agreed, smiling brightly at her beloved brother, before taking the two of them home via Teleport.

"I've been wondering, is it true that the desert flowers bloom beautifully?"

"Rare though they are, yes," Baki replied, not bothering to look away from Gaara, who always seemed to be so much more restless on the nights of a full moon. "But be careful of the berries they become, for the fruits of the desert are often deadly."

The man Baki spoke to nodded in acceptance of the coded message, the glass eyes of his blank Anbu mask glinting green in the dim light.

"I trust you're having little difficulty keeping your genin leashed?" he commented, gesturing towards the sleepless jinchuuriki.

"Less than I would expect, actually," Baki agreed. "Though I wouldn't put too much faith in his opponents surviving to the end of the finals, not that that changes much with Gaara."

"As long as he holds to the plan, then whatever collateral damage he causes will be completely acceptable," the other decided. "It will hardly matter once the village is crushed anyway."

"Watch what you say!" The sand ninja scowled back. "The village security is already on alert, thanks to your master's decision to show his hand early. The last thing we need is to be caught-"

Baki fell silent, glaring off into the darkened alley below them.

"Relax," the Anbu advised, patting the air placatingly, and earning an annoyed look for the gesture. "They're not going to learn anything we don't let them. Remember who you're talking to, and who my master is."

"I remember." Baki replied dismissively, turning his eyes away from the suspicious area and trying to watch with his peripheral vision. "And you're almost as cocky as he is. You should remember as well: This is Otogakure's plan, and Sunagakure isn't going to take step one unless we're certain of victory."

"Then be certain," Kabuto agreed, grinning behind his mask. "Gathering information is what I do, and there's a pleasant little politico who's been quite... accommodating, towards our cause."

Baki growled deep in his throat at the thought of working with, even indirectly, the kind of back stabbing political fool which had put his village in this situation in the first place.

"I know, but his resources have been most useful, and his price is quite reasonable," Kabuto explained. "A bit of revenge, and the chance to run his village the way he wants... as if any civilian could ever command ninja on his own..."

"A pile of rubble on the other hand..." He added with a dark chuckle, which was mirrored by the Suna jounin.

"Very well, I shall defer to you for the moment, unless I hear different from the Kazekage," Baki agreed, turning to face his contact fully.

"I'm confident that you will not," Kabuto accepted, retrieving a scroll and offering it to the older man. "Orochimaru-sama left to meet with him personally, just yesterday. It is his desire that the Kazekage be fully involved in the planning phase, so as to best utilize our combined potential."

"Then this would be?" Baki asked, taking the offered item, though he declined to open it.

"A large portion of the information we've gathered," Kabuto replied. "Anbu identities, locations of escape shelters, and priority targets... as well as a bounty notice or two for people Orochimaru-sama is interested in obtaining, alive, if possible."

"I assume the Uchiha boy is one of those," Baki muttered, pocketing the scroll for later perusal.

"Indeed, despite his loss in the preliminaries, my master is quite taken with him," Kabuto confirmed. "It would have been nice to acquire that one while he was in the hospital still, but he recovered much faster than projected."

"Mmm," his sand ally grunted noncommittally "If one of our ninja comes across the Uchiha, he will be taken alive." The man promised, "as to the others... well, it will be a warzone."

"And such nasty places those are," Kabuto agreed. "But so long as that one is alive, and the village is crushed, I doubt the details will be a bother to anyone."

"Then I suppose one more corpse won't matter to anyone," Baki decided. "Call it a gesture of good faith, an assurance that we will hold to our alliance, unless given cause to do otherwise."

"Very well then, I leave our little spy to you," Kabuto agreed belatedly, the sand ninja having already put action to his words.

In one flash of motion, Baki shot into the shadowed alley, where he'd sensed the spy earlier, turning the corner and launching a half-aimed punch that hit the wooden wall with splintering force.

"Baaan!" a small puppet-like pokemon screeched, panicking at the attack that passed right through it's spectral face, falling in a panicked scramble and rushing off, leaving the can of refuse it had been poking through to clatter noisily to the sidewalk.

"Just a pokemon?" He mused, looking after the creature and straining his senses to determine whether or not an actual human were nearby.

"Someone's a little high strung," Kabuto teased, dropping down beside him. "But better safe than sorry I suppose."

"Maybe..." Baki replied absently. He considered asking the treacherous Konoha ninja if he had sensed anything, but wasn't nearly certain that Orochimaru's minion would be honest if he had.

"In any case, I'd best get back before I'm missed," Kabuto decided. "I'm supposed to still be doing my disciplinary patrols afterall. Such a meaningless punishment, but what Danzo-sama commands..." He finished with a flippant shrug as he vanished in his own shunshin.

Baki looked around once more after the boy had left, frowning, breathing deeply in search of any hint of the intruder, eyes going wide as a faintly familiar aroma came to him.

"That wasn't just a pokemon," He decided, biting back a curse as he wondered where that sick proctor had vanished to, and what complications his survival might cause.

Moments earlier:

"Then I suppose one more corpse won't matter to anyone," Baki decided. "Call it a gesture of good faith, an assurance that we will hold to our alliance, unless given cause to do otherwise."

"Very well then, I leave our little spy to you," Kabuto agreed belatedly, the sand ninja having already put action to his words.

Weezing's heads expanded, gulping air to produce a veiling haze as Hayate cursed their luck silently, one hand flying to the hilt of his sword, hoping to be able reach the Hokage, or backup, in time.

But as he tried to leap away, the shadowed ground beneath his feet gave way, leaping up to engulf man and Poison pokemon both, before once more fading into true darkness, leaving a different pokemon in it's wake.

By the time Baki arrived, there was no evidence of the ninja, and the only the barest hint of the pokemon's.

Hayate disoriented and falling through utter absolute blackness, drew his blade, slashing it through the void around him, careful to keep his blade from where he could sense Weezing caught in this strange attack alongside him.

He felt his blade meet, and part, a number of sticky strands, inciting an angry hiss from his attacker.

A confident grin bloomed on his face, bare moments before the darkness around him changed, becoming less deep and far less insidious... and even more painful, as he was fully released by the attack and left to fall to the hard stone floor beneath him, the impact triggering another coughing fit.

"Weeeeze?" His pokemon asked, drawing out the word inquisitively as he floated down, a light flickering to life on the designs beneath it's faces.

Hayate blinked in the light, but quickly pushed to his feet, with one hand, the other held before his mouth, hoping the strain hadn't left him bleeding internally again.

"I-*cough* I'm fine," he claimed, retrieving his sword from where it had landed in the fall. "Where the he-*cough cough* hell are we?" He wondered looking around the obviously man-made tunnel he'd landed in.

"Weezing?" the pokemon moaned, floating closer, providing light, and resuming production of it's healing mist. (Flash)

"Thanks," Hayate murmured, patting the pokemon with his free hand, holding the blade at his side, relaxed but ready.

Hayate gazed around suspiciously, back and forth along the path, and leaping up to inspect the area he appeared from, though it seemed to be perfectly impassible.

Dropping back to his feet, Hayate frowned as he paced in one direction, then the other, seeming confused, moving to sheathe his blade...

But instead spinning a slash into a patch of shadow that Weezing's light couldn't seem to illuminate.

The patch of darkness bled into the stone, and his sword met nothing.

"Clever, clever," a taunting voice sang directionlessly around him. "But not clever enough, hmm? Poor little Leaf-nin, caught in a pot... Tried too hard to spy, but only got caught!"

Hayate grimaced at the half-mad cackling of his captor.

"What do you want?" He demanded, brandishing his weapon and moving randomly around, Weezing floating at his back, their three sets of eyes watching everything.

"Oh, many things. Many, many, many things, but none which you can give me, I'm afraid," the voice answered. "So I figured I'd... amuse myself by teaching you how a real ninja spies on the likes of those fools."

"But you had to go and attack me!" It continued with a snarling whine, which quickly shifted back to playful malice. "I should kill you just for that... but I think I'll just leave you here... It's not like I have any obligation to you, Leaf-nin."

"Why don't you try it," Hayate challenged, bringing his sword into position for his most serious technique, the Crescent Moon Dance. "One opening, that's all I need to finish you off, betrayer!"

Dark laughter surrounded him, and the shadows deepened, shifting like hidden beasts.

"Maybe I'll give you that chance, Leaf-nin... or maybe, I'll just make you stay down here until you rot!" The voice countered angrily.

Another voice, half heard, murmured, and the mood seemed to shift as the environment returned to normal.

"We will meet again, Leaf-nin," The voice promised petulantly. "But we've more important matters than teaching some half-dead ingrate proper manners. Enjoy your stay, it may be a while."

"Looking forward to it," Hayate promised, though he suspected his apparent opponent was already gone.

Sheathing his sword, and looking to the mist emitting from Weezing, he determined that what little air flow there might be was too minute for detection.

Whipping out a kunai, he scored the wall on both sides of the tunnel with a large X, and an arrow pointing in the direction he chose to walk.

He'd be damned before he demeaned his katana with such a mundane and potentially damaging task, but he'd be equally damned if he just sat around waiting for that strange shadow user to return.

Sensing a presence, Kirlia's eyes shot open, and she sat up in bed with a start, the alarm she felt enough to shock Naruto out of his own deep sleep.

"Nehan Shōja no Jutsu." (Temple of Nirvana Technique)

The genjutsu hit him like a sack of feathers, and the boy collapsed into an even deeper slumber.

"I understand you wished to speak with me?" Sarutobi said softly, drawing the pokemon's eyes from her partner, as the old man stood gazing out the boy's bedroom window, the flickering light of Infernape's hair-flames making him seem as ancient and enduring as petrified wood.

And more than a little intimidating.

"I... Yes, but why..." Kirlia mumbled, rubbing her tired eyes and trying to gather her thoughts.

This was far from the way she had expected such a conversation to go.

"It was suggested to me that you might not wish Naruto to know of this unusual ability of yours," the Hokage replied, looking towards her with eyes full of rueful understanding. "And of all the people in Konoha, I probably have the least right to object to your decision..."

"Heavy is the head that wears the crown..." Kirlia murmured, tucking Naruto in with Confusion as she hopped out of the bed to stand properly before her indirect leader.

"More than you know," Sarutobi agreed, smiling softly towards the sleeping genin. "Though, perhaps you will someday... But for that to happen, I must continue to protect our home."

"And we shall do all we can to assist you," Kirlia promised fervently. "I swore to Iruka-sensei that I would tell you if I had any visions that could be used to protect the village, and so I am."

As concisely as she could, Kirlia explained the omens she had seen, from the first of Hinata, right through to what she'd seen wandering around with Naruto that afternoon, sharing the visual memory of the damage she'd seen to the village itself.

By the time she was finished, the Hokage's expression was grim and terrifying.

"I cannot properly express how much I appreciate your aid in this, Kirlia-chan," the Sandaime said, dropping to a knee and looking into the girlish pokemon's eyes. "If nothing else, it carries the warning that they intend to destroy the wall, which could leave us vulnerable if another opportunistic enemy chooses to follow their attack."

"Of course, Hokage-sama," Kirlia replied, bowing her head in deference. "I will do anything I may to protect Konoha... It is Naruto's dream to take your hat someday, and he can't do that if there's no village to protect," She added, meeting his eyes with a mischievous twinkle in her eye.

"Right you are,"Sarutobi chuckled, rubbing the pokemon's hair in the way he'd seen Naruto do, and earning a similarly satisfied hum from her.

"Kirlia-chan," he began, turning serious once more. "I am aware that you believe these visions to be unreliable, but I need to know: How likely is it that these events will come to pass?"

She stilled, her smile falling as her eyes went distant. "I... don't know. What I see could be the best possibility, the worst, or anywhere in between. I don't even know who, or what, could cause such damage."

Sarutobi grimaced, but dismissed his disappointment with a shake of his head.

"I think it best if we assume that to be the worst possibility, and treat it as such," he decided. "Though I believe the blame will ultimately fall on my wayward student, Orochimaru... Regardless, knowledge is a ninja's strongest weapon, and every hint and clue is another weapon to be used against our enemies."

"Do you think it will be bad?" Kirlia asked hesitantly.

"No." Sarutobi declared firmly. "I will make sure of it, just like my sensei, Hashirama, and just like the Nidaime and Yondaime... Perhaps, just like Naruto, someday."

"But they all..." Kirlia murmured, trailing off and looking at her partner worriedly.

"Eventually, yes." Sarutobi agreed sadly, though his grim expression quickly gave way to a more why smile. "But to live forever would be a very sad existence, wouldn't you agree?"

Kirlia smiled wanly at his attempted humor, her gaze, and thoughts, still focused on Naruto.

"Well, no matter," Sarutobi sighed, accepting the failure of his humor. "I intend it to be quite a few years before I meet the shinigami... though I suppose..."

Sarutobi blew out a sigh, waving away Kirlia's concerned look.

Training up a successor, again, would be a nuisance, but something that was long past due.

"Is there anything else you have need to tell me?" He asked instead.

"No, not at the moment," Kirlia replied with a shake of her head. "But if there's anything I can do to help, please tell me." she offered sincerely.

"I surely will, but until then allow me to take my leave," Sarutobi said politely, tipping his hat in deference to the nominal owner of the home he'd invaded and vanishing in a shunshin.

Kirlia wondered briefly how similar the shunshin technique was to teleportation, since the man seemed to bypass both the door and the windows in his exit.

Over at the Hokage's Tower, Sarutobi sat at his desk pondering the information he'd learned, marking the potential breaches on a map of the village, and considering what his forces had learned so far.

Otogakure, Orochimaru's pet village, was the primary threat, but it's forces weren't nearly enough to pose a valid danger on it's own.

If only there was some way to...

The man who's mind had earned him the title of 'Professor' sat back in his chair as an idea occurred to him.

His eyes sought out the mission scroll he'd set aside a few days before, a mid-priority C-rank which could suit his purposes nicely... Quite a few purposes, if circumstances played out right...

Sarutobi smiled a cunning grin that even the Kyuubi would have been proud of as he packed his pipe and lit it.

Now he just needed his problematic pervert of a student to gather enough nerve to present himself to his commander.

Orochimaru glared at the corpse at his feet, not entirely certain whether he'd have preferred the man to accept his fate, or to have made a better fight of it.

The serpent Sannin kicked the the Kazekage over, and tore free his legendary blade from the man's chest, clearing it's toxic edge of blood with a whipping motion as he glowered around at the man's supposedly elite defenders.

"Want us to clean up the rest of this trash, Orochimaru-sama?" one of his own elite agent offered, the rotund boy fully immersed in his curse mark's second stage.

"Bonus round, double points!" another leered, juggling his orange metal blades from hand to hand to hand to hand... a feat only possible due to his ridiculous number of arms.

"I need one alive," Orochimaru declared simply, turning his back on the remaining Suna ninja contemptuously. "Eliminate the rest."

Ignoring the sounds of slaughter behind him, and the occasionally close flying jutsu, he crouched down before the dead Kazekage.

"You should be proud you know," he said conversationally. "Your sacrifice is merely one step along my road to greatness, and the proving ground for the technique which will end Konohagakure's reign forever...

"But I suppose that's cold comfort to someone in your...situation," he added with a bit of a grin.

The fight was predictably brief, and soon a ninja, battered but intact, was forced to his knees a respectful step behind the Sound's leader.

Orochimaru spared a glance over his shoulder for the prisoner, before rotating to face the man.

"You, my intrepid young ninja, are about to become one of the precious few to have glimpsed the great beyond while still alive... mostly," he explained, to the man being held down by Jirobo, who, like his allies, had dropped down into their normal states.

"You treacherous fool! Do you really think Sunagakure will aid in your invasion after what you've done?!" The stubborn Suna-nin swore, spitting his words viciously. "You've damned yourself, and your plans!"

"Hmm, doubtful," Orochimaru mused. "I suppose if your Kazekage were a more social man, perhaps... but I sorely doubt anyone will even notice."

"His children, if they can be called such, are in Konoha already, and his disdain for his supposed Council is nearly as famous as I am... In truth, so long as I wear his robes, and his face, I doubt anyone will even notice his absence..."

"Meanwhile, I get a second unquestioning army, and a test subject nearly as powerful as those I plan to use to help in that pathetic village's destruction..." Orochimaru added, patting the jounin on the cheek patronizingly.

"Truly, it's a win-win scenario for me," he claimed, tearing the hand away and impaling it clean to the wrist in the Kazekage's chest.

Sakon stepped forward, unrolling a scroll with a seal shaped like a broken circle drawn upon it's page, holding it taught enough for his master's needs, as Orochimaru withdrew his hand and pressed his prize, the Kazekage's very heart upon it, discarding the bloody organ immediately after.

Orochimaru then took the scroll and placed it on the ground, where the blood leaked away, forming a complex seal around the captured ninja, leaving Jirobo the barest moments to make his escape.

He then clasped his hands together, activating the jutsu, just as the ninja gained his feet and began whatever useless feat he was going to attempt.

The man screamed as it took hold, scraps of paper, yellowed with age, emerging from the ground encasing him, muffling and mummifying him.

Across the dune, a half dead pokemon screamed in sympathy, it's body exploding with light which fluctuated from red to brown to purple and back, until the Camerupt vanished, presumably dismissing itself to escape.

An act which seemed to spontaneously incite the self dismissal of every surviving pokemon in the vicinity, much to the Sound Four's surprise.

At the same moment it fled, the scraps fell from the ninja, revealing a familiar face.

"You." The single word, spoken with such venom that Orochimaru, used to acting without his own pokemon's presence, dismissed the puzzle from his mind for the time being.

"Welcome back, Kazekage-sama," Orochimaru said cheerfully, bowing with mocking deference to the formerly dead man, retrieving a nasty looking kunai as he straightened with a hungry expression on his face. "I'm afraid I needed to... coerce your assistance in a certain experiment of mine. Feel free to object... If you can."

Sakon and Ukon, Kidomaru, Jirobo, and even Tayuya were less complacent to the pokemon's disappearance, having never seen their pokemon show fear in any way... and not one of the four could get their partners to stick around until that stretch of desert was long behind them.

Orochimaru was just pleased with the progress he'd made testing the Edo Tensei, and securing the cooperation of the desert village.

Kabuto had outdone himself with that suggestion, even if the Yondaime Kazekage was a bare candle when compared to the Hokages he planned to control.

Mewtwo's eyes narrowed as he felt the nearby presence of one rarely appearing in the world of light, near enough that it was impossible to be mere coincidence.

"What do you want, Giratina," the Hand of Arceus demanded coldly.

"Trouble on your side." The pokemon ruler of the so-called reverse world answered with a voice that met, and exceeded even Mewtwo's icy tone.

Mewtwo turned to face the Draconian Ghost, large even among Legendaries, particularly in it's current serpentine form.

The Psychic type stared long at it's opposite, one of the few, like himself, to have opposed the natural order of poke-kind willingly, before nodding a shallow bow to the one who ruled the realm of life after life for pokemon.

"I'm listening," he said, words as imperious as ever, but tone more accepting of whatever Giratina had to deliver.

"Something on your side attempted to force open the veil between worlds," the Renegade Pokemon explained. "I know not who, nor do I care, save that the dangers it sparked within my own realm were not easily quelled."

"And so you come to me to solve this problem for you," Mewtwo asked with a half smile and an evil glint in his eye. "Are you aware of where this attempt originated?"

"Would I appear upon this horrid land if I had not exhausted my own search?" Giratina asked sharply. "Come, and I will lead you there."

Giratina opened a void in existence, a gateway into the realm between his world and the material one, and Mewtwo, with well hidden reluctance, passed through the Ghost infused area, emerging onto the warm sand of a desert battleground. (Shadow Force)

"This is the place?" He asked to clarify, turning his nose up at the unpleasant aroma of blood, ashes, and death.

"I am certain, though the cause seems to have been him," Giratina confirmed, pointing with his skeletal wings at the robed corpse, half buried in the sand.

"He has no face," Mewtwo observed.

"You are a deductive genius," the other remarked sarcastically. "You may also note he has no heart."

"I'd be surprised if this one ever possessed one to begin with, but I know the man who's work this is," Mewtwo replied, his tone steeped in old anger, as he passed around the desert field, pausing once to press his three bulbous fingers into the sand where the Camerupt once lay. "Tell me though... What was the effect of this disturbance?"

"Nearly tore open a passage between the worlds," Giratina growled back. "I told you as much moments ago!"

"And if you hadn't stopped the attempt?" Mewtwo asked.

"I do not-"

"Next time, let it run it's course," the artificial pokemon interrupted angrily.. "Long have I sought the life of this... scaled worm. But so long as his sins fall solely upon the heads of humanity, he stays safe due to the line Arceus has drawn... My hands have been tied by our leader's tolerance!"

"But the instant he crosses that line..." Giratina mused, appreciating the other Legendary's reasoning.

"It becomes my responsibility to eliminate him," Mewtwo confirmed. "That one has the makings of the Tyrant reborn, and I will not stand for another of his ilk!"

"Then I will accept your proposed course in this," the Renegade agreed. "If only to snub the old master... Now, I take my leave of you and your wretched world."

"May our next meeting be many years away," Mewtwo offered, nodding again in respect to his older counterpart.

Giratina opened another of those terribly numb gateways and returned to the reverse world of the pokemon afterlife, a place he never expected to see.

Though part of him wondered what it was like, ruled as it was by the spectral dragon... and to a degree, Arceus.

"Orochimaru..." Mewtwo thought, clenching his fist as he stared down at the corpses of those pokemon to stubborn to dismiss themselves, and too weak to survive the battle.

"Humans never change..." He decided, forcing away the memories of those humans who had been so, so different from the majority.

In the end, they had refused to change too, even unto death...

A/N

Chapter 19, done, and for once, I got about everything i had planned in. One more chapter to go before the finals, where I once more try to make interesting fights... this time without the allowance of anything too one-sided.

For those who are interested, What Kakashi was training Naruto in is essentially the Game's incarnation of Telepathy, keeping the pokemon aware of what it's allies are doing so that one's own team cannot hurt it. It's also a bit like the Rinnegan's sight, though far less effortless. Not sure how far it will go though, so *shrug*.

One other note on Naruto's abilities: I have in the last month acquired and watched Fate/Stay Night, and all I can say is Damn, it is awesome. I know true shame for not watching it more commonly, and now wish there was a Summoner!Naruto story where he summons one of them as a partner. (Personally, I think Rider would be a good fit, in regards to being punished for crap they weren't responsible for.)

I went on a bit of a tangent there, but back to the point: During my second watching, I realized: Naruto's Chakra weapons are pretty similar to Archer's weapon creation (Not the Unlimited Blade Works) Which really would have made his bloodline an awesome fit with the Gallade/Swordsman Naruto concept a number of reader's suggestions have put in my head... Ah well, it gives me more ideas of where to go with it for this story, even if I don't intend to write out the Gallade one. (Seriously, I don't, I update slow enough just writing the one.)

Review Response:

Mesojoe: I hope you're happy, I literally slapped myself when I read your review and realized how craptacular my jutsu names were... I need to focus on being a lot less literal minded when I'm coming up with those, and probably just setting a translation to something that flows nicely, rather than supplying a 'proper definition' type note... I'll have to reassess those in the next few days, though i doubt I'll use the Discharge Lariat name, if only because that sounds like something similar to how Thunder Wave works, only much cooler and stronger. (probably going to use it like that though, if ya don't object)

I am quite fond of your ideas on the more exotic bloodlines though, and was already thinking along those lines for some characters, such as Han, just hadn't set it down quite like that... Would make the Third Kazekage puppet rather interesting though, when I reach him.

Guest A: I'm not sure if Naruto will learn anything of Sealing, though if he does, it'll likely be while training with Jiraiya. The only one I really had plans on introducing to more complex sealing styles was Tenten, and this chapter is half the reason Ao and the gang are still in the story, rather than getting chucked out after failing out of the prelims. I can pretty well guarantee Naruto and Kirlia will gain some Rasengan combos in the future, I'm not entirely sure what yet though, probably some form of Lightning variation, maybe a ghost infused version, and Teleport? Almost a certainty... Though I'm not sure what the drawback will be, since it seems a little overpowered... I'll have to brainstorm on that more.

Guest B: Go read Vulpine. Beyond that, I don't rush through things, that's my only excuse. I have notes about what I want to clear each story section, which I break into chapters, and that's what I aim for. If you truly think I'm stagnating the story by wasting words on supplementary characters, then that is your opinion, and you are welcome to it. In some way, I'm actually glad i didn't get to Jiraiya last chapter, if only because he did so much more than my plans for him in this one. And just to let you know, Alakazam is a long ways away from appearing. Not til Post Tsunade retrieval, and even then, it's not planned to be him joining the regular cast for even longer.

Alrighty, long bloody note is done, and I'm beat.

Hope y'all enjoyed,

-Mhyrloc