Chapter 3 - Deep Breathes

It was time once again. I could hear them talking, the topic of interest buzzing in my ears like dirty flies. Too many to swat away.

"Luke?" Flora asked, the table turning their attention to me. She'd begun calling me by that name in public a few days ago. No one said anything, assuming I was just finally coming out as a dike.

"Hm?" I asked, my happy mask on.

"Have you thought about the dance..?" her voice trailed off, knowing by my falling smile that that was the wrong question to ask. I scrunched my face up as if something fowl had wafted in my face.

"I have." I said, returning to eating my granola bar.

"So are you going?" Yula asked.

"I...uh, I don't think so." I answered hesitantly. "I hate dancing, and I wouldn't have a date, so there's really no point." I explained, matter-of-factly.

"But it'll be fun!" Katia encouraged sweetly. I smiled but shook my head.

"Nah, I'm really no good with dances. No thanks."

"I know a great girl who'd go with you." Yula added. I raised an eyebrow, half of my mind begging me to correct her but I didn't bother.

"Ahaha..." Flora laughed nervously. I finally got up from the table and threw my lunch away. Professor would be angry if he found out I hadn't been eating it.

"I'm going-"

"To the library." the girls interrupted me before I could finish.

"Uh...what?" they all giggled happily.

"You've been going to the library every day during lunch." Yula explained.

"Yeah, so?" I asked, feeling very unamused.

"And we always see you leave with Mr. Dove." Katia replied, sending my cheeks alight.

"W-What are you implying? He's a teacher!" I argued.

"Hmm, whatever you say." Flora hummed.

"You too...?" I sighed. "You're all are crazy!" I said rushing off towards the library.

"They all really want me to go to that stupid dance." I sighed, turning the page of my book lazily. Clive smirked.

"So why not go?"

"You know why." I answered bitterly.

"Professor would definitely let you wear a tux. So I'm afraid I don't know why."

"Its...its the whole experience." I explained, finally looking up from my book to meet Clive's eyes. "It doesn't matter what I do as a guy, if people don't see me as male then I'm just a weirdo."

"I guess thats true." Clive said after a short silence. "But if you don't push their view of you then it'll never change. Right?"

"So you're saying I should go." I glared.

"Yeah, I am actually. You don't have enough friends your own age." he laughed. My head ducked down to look at my book, hiding the blush creeping onto my cheeks. Clive looked really good when he's laughing... "Come on, I'll be there." he said. "Just try it, okay?"

"F-Fine." I muttered. "I'll go."

Professor had been more than ecstatic to get me a tux, and even happier when I went to my room to change for the dance. I stared at myself in my bedroom mirror, a horrible dread lingering in my heart. The fear of the unknown is a powerful thing indeed.

I shook my head, pulling out my binding bandages, wrapping them around myself tightly. Those damn breasts were getting too big. Why couldn't my body just get the message that I didn't want them?

I took a deep breath, wincing. It was tight, maybe too tight, but I couldn't loosen it. So I threw on the pieces of my tux and headed out, knotting my tie as I descended the stairs.

"Luke, my boy!" Professor said happily. "You look...very gentlemanly." he said, a proud smile on his face. I smiled back.

"Thanks, Professor."

He drove me and Flora to the school happily. My nervousness seemed to peak as I shut the car door, Professor bidding us farewell. I couldn't seem to breath as Flora tugged me inside.

"Flora!" Yuna and Katia called her over. She let my arm go and ran to her friends, instantly joining in the dancing. I sighed, looking around awkwardly. I walked along the sides of the gymnasium until I spotted Clive's figure waving to me. I took a relieved breath and came to his side.

"I really didn't think you'd come." he said, handing me a cup of punch. I stared at it, my eyes drifting to the students dancing in the middle of the room.

"Ahah, yeah me too..." I said, leaning against the wall. I just wanted to leave. This was ridiculous, why had ever agreed to come?

"Not going to dance?" he asked, sipping his punch.

"No...I don't think so." I took a deep breath, the anxiety of the situation really beginning to affect me. Clive raised an eyebrow.

"Come on, why don't you dance with me?" he asked, setting both of our cups on the adjacent table. My cheeks flushed.

"What? No way." I answered hesitantly, but Clive took my hand regardless and led me to the floor. "H-Hey, I said no!" I said, trying to pull away.

Clive took my other hand, forcing me to move with the beat of the pop music playing over us. His fingers laced with mine as we danced. Or rather, as Clive danced and threw me around. However it wasn't until my vision began getting fuzzy and I tripped into the man that I knew this wasn't good.

"Luke?" he asked worriedly. My hands on Clive's shoulders, I pushed myself up and stumbled out of the crowd until I fell against the wall, sliding down. Clive knelt beside me. "Are you okay?"

"N-No, I'm fine...!" I choked on the words when I leaned forward, a sharp sting of pain shocking my body. I let out a small cry, falling into Clive's arms.

"You are most certainly not." he growled, scooping me up and taking me out into the night air. He pulled out his phone to call an ambulance but I hit it away from him.

"No way! Professor'll know if you call!" I wheezed, pain striking me with every breath. Clive set me down angrily.

"Know what?" he asked. I faltered, knowing exactly what was going on but not wanting to admit it. Sweat began beading on my face, the stress of just breathing becoming too much. "Luke!" he yelled.

"I-I just bound...too tight...is all." I explained softly.

"Thats it." Clive picked up his phone and started calling the hospital despite my objections.

"Dammit, Clive, don't!" I coughed, instantly regretting my words. Of course he called anyways.

Author's Notes-

This chapter's a little short and vague on details, I know. This is because this has never actually happened to me (the whole breaking/fracturing a rib, or you know, going to dances. _), so I'm kinda guessing at how it would go down. I do however know how it feels to not be able to breath when binding, and it sucks. For a while I had an infection in my lungs, but I still had to go to school and my school has three buildings placed around our downtown area, so there's a lot of walking I have to do on a daily basis. I ended up getting an inhaler for it. Never mentioned I bind to the doctor, I wasn't going to risk her telling me to stop or anything. So I definitely understand the feeling of needing to bind to an extreme degree. Even so, I urge everyone out there to be careful. You can really mess yourself up if you're not careful. I've heard binding shirts are the best way to go, and please never use duct tape. It rips the skin off, not fun.

So stay tuned for the next chapter, poor Luke. D:

-AppleLove