A/N: I love Kames so I decided to try this story. I know it's not long but this is just the me what you think. Should I continue it?
Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush.
~~X~~
James walked into apartment 2J and slammed the door. He walked straight to his room that he shared with Kendall, ignoring the confused looks he got from Carlos and Logan. He walked in and slammed that door too, once again ignoring the concerned look he got from Kendall. Kendall had heard the other door being slammed and was worried that something was really wrong with James after he slammed their bedroom door. He looked at James who silently plopped down on his bed, not even sparing Kendall a glance.
Kendall got out of his bed and walked to the side of James' bed. James' back was facing him when he asked, "What's wrong James?" James didn't answer and Kendall sighed. He walked around to the other side, where James was facing. "What happened," Kendall asked, wondering what could have upset his secret crush. "Please tell me."
James looked at Kendall then he began his tale, "I was on my way to the pool when I saw this girl. She's hasn't been here long and I offered to show her around because I wanted to get to know her." James paused. Kendall felt like he died a little inside knowing that James was always going to go after other girls. But despite his own feelings he put on a fake smile and encouraged James. "Keep going." James sighed. "She said no thanks and started to walk away but I wasn't going to give up so easily. I walked after her and tried a more direct approach. I asked her out on a date and she said no. I asked her why not and she said that she wasn't interested in me."
Kendall was a little confused because they all got shot down lots of times, what made this time any different? "You're sad because she said no?" he asked with slight confusion in his voice. James shook his head. "I'm sad because I keep getting 'no' or 'maybe some other time'. I might as well face the fact that no girl will ever want me." Kendall's heart broke as he heard James' words.
"Don't say that," Kendall comforted, "You're a kind, caring guy. Any girl would be lucky to have you. Your special and when you meet the right person, you will see that." Kendall said as he raked his hand through James' hair. Damn, you might as well scream you're in love with him, Kendall thought as pulled his hand away.
He quickly thought up a way to help James. Kendall knew that it would be hell for himself but he'd take if it would make James happy. "You really wanna be with this girl?" Kendall asked, though he already knew the answer. James nodded. Kendall sighed. "Then I'll help you."
"You will?" James asked with happiness in his voice. It almost took away the pain Kendall was feeling. "Sure," he said. James smiled as he asked Kendall how they would do it. "Well," Kendall explained, "If she's still at the pool all you have to do is say something sweet." James looked confused, "Like what?"
Kendall pulled James up into a sitting position and took both of his hands. He thought for a moment before saying, "Your eyes are beautiful," he started while he looked into the taller boy's eyes, "And I love how your hair frames your face," Kendall moved one of his hands and gently moved his fingers through James' soft hair. "Will you go out with me?"
James blushed slightly at what Kendall said but it didn't last long. "That's it?" he asked. "Well, it wouldn't hurt to kiss her if she's willing." James nodded, and said "You can let go of my hands now." Kendall blushed and quickly pulled his hands away. "Sorry," he said with a sheepish smile, "Anyway, go try that with her and you'll have a girlfriend in seconds."
James got up and ran to the door. Before he left he said, "Thanks Kendall." Kendall smiled, "No problem." Without another word James left. Kendall walked into the living room to watch how James was. He walked right pass Carlos and Logan, who only gave him a glance before going back to watching television. He watched the interaction between the girl and his best friend until she took his hand. Kendall already hated her for hurting James but he felt it intensify when he saw them holding hands.
He immediately walked to his room and grabbed a gray beanie from under his bed. He stuck his hand inside and smiled slightly when he felt the cold razor blade he hid inside. Kendall headed for the bathroom and made sure that the door was locked. He looked at himself in the mirror before he let a few tears slip from his eyes. He dragged the blade against his skin quickly, making a shallow cut. He never made deep cuts.
Kendall winced as he felt blood slowly ooze out of the cut. He went a little lower and made two more, in a criss-crossed fashion. This was the only way to deal with the pain. He didn't want to do it but it made him forget. When he cut himself he was able to concentrate on that pain for a little while, and forget about everything else. Kendall cried even more as he continued to let the blood flow from his wrist.
When Kendall thought that he was losing too much blood, he washed the cuts off with some water and grabbed some bandages. He wrapped his arm up and washed the blade off next. He made sure that there wasn't any noticeable blood in the sink before he walked out of the bathroom. He replaced the blade back to its hiding spot.
Kendall has been hiding his feelings for James for a couple of months now. He was always good at hiding his feelings. It started when his father left him. He was so angry and sad but when he was around anyone else, he would act happy. Acting is one of Kendall's unknown talents. He acts like he is in love with Jo, even though he barely likes her. He acts like he's happy all of the time, when he is only happy sometimes. He acts like everything is fine but he knows that everything isn't fine.
One day his mom had caught him crying to himself in his room, and that's when he decided to tell her the truth. They talked about his father for a long while and when they finished, Kendall felt a lot better. But this wasn't the same. He couldn't talk to James about this. He couldn't talk to anyone.
He wiped off his tears and sighed. If James was happy, he would at least try to be happy. And if he absolutely couldn't be happy, he would act like it.