So I wrote this last night while trying to sleep and luckily I had just finished writing it as the power went out…yay me! Haha! So I hope you guys like it, it's just a short little thing. Read and review if you have the time!
No matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop watching her. Her graceful movements. The way she threw her head back as she laughed. The occasional shrug she produced when she wanted to appear like she could care less but he knew no matter what the situation was, she cared. He couldn't get enough of the way she playfully ruffled Reid's hair as she passed him. A large part of him was envious of the boy genius. A small touch between those two were warranted and Reid welcomed them. He'd give anything to feel her hands run though his hair. He couldn't remove his eyes from her when she found something funny and her eyes sparkled. So yes, he couldn't stop watching her, and in the end he didn't want to stop watching her.
Every instinct and alarm in his body told him that wanting her was wrong. That nothing good would possibly come out of going through with his feelings. He couldn't act on them, and that fact above all else drove him insane. There was so much at stake. He could lose everything, but as he watched her throw a ball of paper at Morgan's head, and he heard her laughter carry all the way up into his office, he realized that he would gladly risk it all for her. He'd throw every single thing he owned and loved away just for a chance to be with her. Just for a single night. Hell, he'd risk it all just for one stolen moment.
He wasn't exactly sure when he turned into the type of person he couldn't stand. If he was being honest, he wasn't even sure when he started to look at her differently. From the moment she stepped into his office and introduced herself he knew he was doomed. Memories of the young beautiful Ambassadors daughter that he had once met flooded his mind. Pushing her away was the best option he could come up with. As long as he kept his distance she'd hopefully stay away. Clearly that plan backfired. No matter how hard he pushed her or how many snide comments he made she held her own and stayed right there beside him. That was another reason he respected her.
Even though she was no where near as friendly or comfortable around him as she was with the rest of the team, she broke through his barriers with her charm and wit and he was completely powerless to stop it.
Every night as he laid in bed his mind drifted to her. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't get her out of his mind. Since he couldn't have her, his head decided to tease him with long, sexual fantasies about the raven haired beauty. He tried to avoid sleeping because he knew that she would invade his thoughts and dreams. When that didn't work he gave in and let the thoughts take him over and at the end of them he was always thankful he had them. They gave him something he knew he was never going to have.
There has to be some way to get her to leave his mind. No matter how much he may want her, he could never pull her into his troubled life. It wouldn't be fair to anyone. Most importantly it wouldn't be fair to her. Even though on occasion he would catch her staring at him, and the second she got caught, her face would flare red in embarrassment, so there was no doubt in his mind that she would cross every single line with him. But he couldn't do that to her no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he longed to touch her, to love her. It was never going to happen. He had to accept that. After all Hotch is a married man.