"Will you just stop moaning all the time?" Tayend slammed through the bedroom doors and threw his jacket at the chair with an unnecessary amount of force.

"I am not moaning!" Dannyl closed the doors firmly behind them. "I'm just trying to explain to you that-"

"That you're a boring old man?"

"Better an old man than a spoilt brat."

"How dare you call me that?"

"Because you're behaving like one! You have to grow up and realise that not everyone is like you!"

"What? Brave enough to be who they really are?"

"Stupid enough to think we can keep scandalising the whole of Imardin and not get in any trouble over it."

"Trouble? From who, the moral police?"

"From the Guild for one. Only the other day I-"

"Guild guild guild! I don't care about the damn Guild!"

"You're being completely unreasonable!"

"You're being completely un- un... Unconsiderate!"

"That's not even a word!"

Tayend chucked a pillow at him. "Oh, shut up."

Dannyl sat down on the bed. "Don't throw my own pillow at me."

"I'll throw what I like, thank you very much."

"Oh, you will, will you?"

"I will."

There was a long pause.

"I'm sorry."

There was another pause.

"Tayend? I said I was sorry."

Tayend sat down on the bed beside him and mumbled something.

"What was that?"

He mumbled it again, fiddling with the covers.

"Still didn't catch it."

"...'m sorry."

"Thank you."

Tayend glared at him. "You just have to make me say it every time, don't you?"

"You have to learn humility somehow."

"Shut up," he said again, but without much malice. "You don't really have to apologise anyway."

Dannyl smiled.

"Don't look so smug! You're still wrong!"

"I wasn't looking smug, I was just... well, looking."

"You always look smug, with your smug face, all... handsome, and and... and annoying!"

Dannyl snorted. "Handsome? It's a long time since you bothered calling me handsome."

"What on earth do you mean, bothered? You know that I think that!"

There was another pause.

"You do know that, don't know?"

Dannyl shrugged. "It doesn't matter. I'm forty-seven in a week's time, I mean... I'm too old for handsome."

"You're never," Tayend shifted closer to him, "too old for handsome."

"Oh really?"

"Yes really."

"What if I was eighty?"

"You'd still have this rather enchanting jawline."

"What if I was eighty and lost my memory?"

"I'd give you something shiny to play with."

"...What if I was eighty and lost my memory and started collecting bits of string?"

"Well, then... I don't know, I guess I'd have to kill you. Why are you being so silly, why does it matter? That's never going to happen."

"I thought it might make you smile."

"...oh." Tayend tentatively rested his cheek on Dannyl's chest. "I miss this."

"What?"

"Nothing. That was stupid."

"No, come on, what?"

"Nothing."

"What?"

"I don't know! ...it's the way you smell, I think."

"Really? And what do I smell of, pray tell?"

"Not of anything, just... it."

"Just 'it'?"

"Stop making fun of me."

"I'm not, I'm just trying to understand your drunken babbling."

"I'm not drunk! I just... I just... I just miss you."

"But I'm right here. We live together. We see each other all the time."

"But I miss... I miss you."

Dannyl sighed, irritated. "You mean we don't go to bed together often enough."

"Stop trying to make out like that's stupid and shallow of me! It's not fair."

"Isn't it shallow? All you can think about is your immediate desires."

"Immediate? I've been with you for almost eighteen years; I think the immediate desires passed a while ago."

Dannyl pushed Tayend's head off his chest. "You know what I mean. It's all about that."

"It's not all about 'that'."

"What is it then?"

"It... it's the way you smell. It's the warmth. And the sweat. And the stubble and the imperfections and the bumps and the mistakes and the skin and the breath and, and... and."

"...and?" Dannyl asked quietly.

Tayend shrugged. "And. And you? Just and. Why does there have to be an and anyway, and is a stupid word-"

Dannyl kissed him.

"...are we still arguing?" Tayend wiped his mouth absently with the back of his hand. "Only, I got a bit confused. I probably am quite drunk, you know."

"I know you are," Dannyl laughed.

"Not too drunk though," he added, putting his hand on Dannyl's thigh. "In case you were wondering. Not incapable."

"You're never been incapable as long as I've known you."

"No, I never have, have I? That's one of my better qualities, I think. Capability."

"Quick recovery time."

"That too." Tayend grinned. "I do try not to make you feel inadequate that way, but it's just the way I am I'm afraid."

"I always thought I was the one who made you feel inadequate," smiled Dannyl, putting an arm around Tayend's shoulders.

"My dear, it's not what you have, it's how you use it."

"Oh really?"

"Oh yes."

"But... you don't use it. Most of the time it's pretty much out of the equation."

"Well, yes, but it's there. If I were called upon to use it, I could. And very well, too."

"Easy to say when you don't have to prove it."

Tayend pretend to look affronted for a moment, then pulled himself into Dannyl's lap with one quick movement. "The only reason I don't have to prove it is because you're a complete baby."

"I am not a complete baby!"

"Oh please, you are! You couldn't take it like a man."

"Oh, and you reckon you take it like a man, do you?"

"Of course," Tayend sniffed haughtily.

"You whimper like a little girl!"

"Uh! I do not!"

"Uh! You do!"

"You love it anyway."

"Sure I do."

"You do." Tayend twisted so he could pinch Dannyl's cheek, hard. "Admit you love my whimpering."

Dannyl pulled Tayend back against his lap. "Only when you admit you love it this way round."

"I will if you will."

"Well I will if you will."

"You go first."

"No, you go first."

"Never."

"Never."

They kissed again, hard.

"Ow! You made my lip bleed."

"I thought you said you liked the imperfections."

"...you're a bastard."

"Admit you like it a little bit sometimes."

"Shut up."