AN: OK, so... I watched Starship, guys. And I realized that this idea is going to be done over countless times...but I'd like to be known as one of the firsts to write this. I'd like to thank Kierza for the title and grammar correction and support...and just being totally awesome. C: Just for clarification, this is going to be an ONGOING story about all the escapades Taz and Up get into before and after the events of Starship. So...yeah, enjoy!

PBR

The Quinceañera Battle

Let it be a universally known fact that Taz hates wearing dresses. Or maybe it was just the color pink.

Pink was muy femenina, so utterly girly that the day her mother showed her the quinceañera dress she was supposed to wear, she promptly locked herself in her room, refusing to come out until the dress was set on fire. And who wouldn't, really? With its full pink skirt overly decorated with pink tulle and pink cloth roses and its glittery pink bodice that hugged her skin uncomfortably, the dress was an abomination. An abomination that Taz had refused to wear.

But the only thing Taz hated more than pink was losing an argument with her mother, which, unfortunately, was a regular ordeal.

So, here she was; standing miserably in a group of adults she barely knew as they all exclaimed about how hermosa she looked in the stupid, fluffy, pink dress that was supposed to signify her descent into womanhood.

Tazmania Alvarez was fifteen years old today, and she was not enjoying herself. For the past few hours, all she was content to do was watch her guests, most of whom were, as mentioned earlier, adults she did not know or care about, entertain themselves, keep an eye on her annoying older brothers, and stay as far away from her party as possible. Only her mother, who, for the first few hours of the party, attempted to "introduce" her to some "very nice" boys and their families, who Taz should try and "get to know better", hindered the latter fact. This, of course, was her mother's old-fashioned plan to get Taz married off, now that she was a woman.

"If being a woman means wearing estúpido dresses all the time, I think I'll stay a girl, gracias."

What was the point of having a quinceañera anyway? Her family, she knew, could barely afford the dress she was now wearing, let alone all the food and decorations and the enorme banner that blazed Taz's full name. And with the war going on, how could all these shallow people mingle in her backyard and not feel the slightest guilt? Por el amor de Dios, there were Rangers stationed not ten feet away outside the gate!

"Idiotas." she mused.

Then again, the Rangers stationed in her small town really didn't mean anything in her mind. They took advantage of their resources, went though women of the night like thirsty men go through water, and generally annoyed everyone in their small town. The war was far away, being fought in the more prosperous and populous cities, not in her backyard. Taz could not help but feel skeptical.

And that's when it happened.

One minute, the guests were dancing happily under the twinkling lights of lanterns and stars; the next, screams punctuated the air as gunshots were fired. Taz's eyes widened as she watched the crowd mill locamente around her backyard, obviously terrified of something Taz could not see. What were they so afraid of?

Then, she saw them.

There were only ten of them, but with the destruction they instilled, there might as well have been a hundred. They moved with stiff joints through the crowd, the explosion of machinery preceding them. Their chrome bodies glinted with the lantern-light above their heads. Taz could swear they were staring at her with their red, laser-like eyes.

Robots.

And they were coming right towards her.

She backed toward the fence, flattening herself against it. The robots extended their arms towards her, all the while murmuring in their monotone voices "Destroy all humans. Destroy all humans." Her breathing became shallow. Surely this was the end of Tazmania Alvarez.

Then, she hit the ground.

"Oh Dios, I've been killed." She instantly thought, bracing herself for the worst.

Instead, she felt two hands on her shoulders and a voice whispered in her ear "Stay down, and don't move." The voice was abrasive to her ear. Against her better judgments, she obeyed, peeking through her eyelashes to catch a glimpse of the owner of this voice. What she could see was the back of a Ranger, his grey camo stained with the grime of battle, swing a massive gun into his hands. "Come and get it, you dumb machines!" he cried out. The robots fixated their artificial eyes on him and advanced, instead, towards him. Then, with precise accuracy, he fired, hitting each one. One by one, they fell to the ground, sparking and shutting down. The Ranger, the only Ranger there, Taz realized, had just saved her single-handedly.

The short, stunned silence that followed was broken only by the footsteps of more Rangers advancing into Taz's backyard. "Too late to do any good." Taz thought cynically. As they wove through the crowd the Ranger, the one that had saved them, turned to look back at Taz. Much younger than the other Rangers in her town, this one looked like a new graduate from the Academy. His dark hair, cropped short due to protocol, was encrusted with dirt, as was his face. It was odd, Taz thought, his face was; it had the hardened, soldier-like look, but his eyes—his eyes had that boyish spark that most other Rangers she saw had already lost. He smiled, only briefly, and walked up to who could only be his boss, the Commander.

"Report, Lieutenant." He said in a gruff voice, looking thoroughly perturbed.

"Ten of them, Sir; a small band identical to the ones that have infiltrated elsewhere tonight. All of them are destroyed, Sir."

"No casualties?"

"None, sir." A pause. "Sir, can I speak my mind?"

"Continue."

"I don't think they wanted to kill anyone…not yet, anyways. I think this was meant to be a warning."

Another pause. "Yes…I think you're right." For a brief second, the Commander looked tired beyond belief. The next, he snapped to attention. "Dismissed, Lieutenant."

A salute, and the Ranger turned around facing Taz once again. He grinned, and began walking towards the girl. Realizing that she was still on the ground, Taz sat up, noticing the grass in her long black hair and on her dress. The Ranger stepped forward, holding his hand out to Taz, grinning. "Hey." He said in that rough drawl.

Taz stared at his hand, snorted with laughter, and pushed herself off the ground without his help.

"Uh…" he mumbled, then said in garbled Spanish. "Ho-la. Como es-taz? Si eres…" he paused. "Injured-o?"

Taz raised her eyebrows. "I can speak English, dumbass."

The Ranger reddened with embarrassment, and cleared his throat. "Right. Of course."

Taz rolled her eyes.

"I'm Lieutenant Up." The Ranger said. "And you must be…" he glanced at the amazingly still-intact banner behind him. "Tazmania?"

"Taz." Taz replied. "No one calls me Tazmania." She put her hands on her hips. "That was some buen shooting you did just now."

Lieutenant Up shrugged. "Just part of my job, little missy."

Before Taz could retort that she hated being called "little", there was a strangled cry and blur as Taz was engulfed by her mother. "Oh, mi hija! Mi bebé! Mi pobre, pobre Tazmania. I am so agradecido you're safe!"

Taz did not look like she agreed. "Mamá!" she groaned, her voice muffled by her mother's shoulder. "I can't breathe."

"And you!" Her mother quickly let go of her, turning on the Lieutenant. "You saved her!"

Up flushed. "Well...yeah, I guess. But, it's just part of the job, ma'am." He reiterated.

"What does that matter? You saved her," Taz's mother took the Lieutenant's face in her hands and kissed him on both cheeks. "and our family is forever en deuda to you."

Lieutenant Up's cheeks, in response, turned even redder as Taz hid a smile and laughter behind her mother's back.

"Come," her mother continued. "We will feed you now."

And with that, a bewildered Up was led by Taz's mother to the half-destroyed food table, where he was force-fed multiple empanadas.

Taz laughed, enjoying herself for the first time that night.