Live for me

Angst/Romance

Summary: Kaname felt like Zero was a wild animal that could never be tamed. But Kaname wanted to try anyway. He wanted to get closer, to bring his walls down...

Warnings: Yaoi, rated M, inspired by the manga, I don't think you can consider it as spoilers but anyways - and some OOCness, obviously, since it's Kaname/Zero...

I sure as hell don't own Vampire Knight lol it belongs to the talented Matsuri Hino

Chapter 1

Messy long brown hair was sprawled on the white sheets. Zero ran his long pale fingers through the soft locks, and then slid them to the handsome face. Caressing Kaname's pale cheek, he admired the sleepy crimson eyes when they opened to look back at him. Zero leaned down to place a light kiss on his pale cheek, and then worked his way to his jaw line, to his ear and then finally to his neck. Kaname let out a little moan and arched his back when Zero kissed his jugular.

The brunet aggressively flipped them over, and it was Zero's turn to be pinned down to the large bed. He blushed slightly and glanced away as Kaname admired his naked body. But Kaname cupped his chin in his hand to turn his head, and then with a little smirk his face came closer and closer and those perfect pale lips touched Zero's. Kaname's kiss was passionate and tender at the same time, his lips parting so that their tongues were touching, his taste enthralling and delicious, and his embrace tender. Zero ran his hands all over Kaname's smooth backside, pressing their lean bodies closer. Their erections rubbed and he moaned into the kiss. As for Kaname, he smiled and pulled away slightly.

The pureblood's smile was mysterious, as if loving and mocking at the same time. He slowly moved away so that he was sitting beside Zero, and the latter tried to hold on to him but it was no use. Kaname pushed him away, and he was stronger. The brunet looked at the doorway, and Zero followed his stare slowly. There, a female pureblood was standing, with a mirror in her hands and wearing only a very short and revealing nightgown. Yuki; Kaname's little sister and Zero's once close friend.

She also had a mocking expression on her pretty little face as she stared at Zero. The latter suddenly crawled on his side on the bed, nervous, and covered himself with the sheets. Kaname's eyes were still locked on his sister. She slowly swerved her eyes back at him, and made her way towards the still naked man sitting on the bed. She threw herself in his arms and kissed him passionately. Zero frowned and swallowed hard. He was jealous of their love, jealous of what they had, but most of all, he was jealous of Yuki.

Kaname broke the kiss to glance at Zero mockingly, raising a fine brow. He felt out of place. Yuki laughed and raised her hand, which was still holding the small mirror.

She smiled, "Look..."

He hesitantly glanced in the mirror and he gasped, horrified. His eyes were not their usual amethyst, instead they were bright red, and there was blood all over his face and pouring from his mouth.

"Level E," Kaname snorted. "You can't be a vampire. You can't be a hunter. You can't be a human. You are nothing."

Zero gasped and his eyes snapped open as he looked at the ringing alarm clock on the small desk beside his single bed. He pressed on it to stop the annoying buzzing sound and let his head fall back on his pillow. He sighed as he put his fingers in his hair and on his forehead. What a fucked up dream, he thought, a little bit freaked out at his own subconscious. The whole level E and you are nothing part was normal, he dreamed about that often... He was not a level E yet – yet being the keyword. It freaked him out everyday to think that there was the possibility that he would become that.

But that thing with Kuran Kaname... at the beginning of the dream... He shivered and brushed the thought away, he definitely didn't want to think about it. He made his way to the bathroom and shivered again because he was only wearing pajama pants. It was winter, and the heat was not working in his apartment. He had called the owner a few times, but no one had come to fix it yet. It was a small and crappy place, and he didn't pay a very high rent for it, so he supposed he shouldn't expect a good service anyway.

He tried to relax under the warm and soothing shower – at least that was working – and then he hurried up to get ready for the day. Well, what was left of it since he had woken up in the late afternoon. He put on a simple black t-shirt and black jeans, picked up his large and warm jacket and went outside, not even bothering to let his hair dry. He found his feet making the distance to the Association without even clearly deciding to go there. It was his life. He had nothing else. Killing vampires was what he lived for. He closed his eyes before opening the door, trying not to think about the fact that he was a vampire himself. He finally made his way inside, and directly to Yagari's office. The door was open, so with only a slight knock he walked in.

"Hey Zero, you look tired," he commented as he saw him.

"Whatever," Zero shrugged and took a look at the sheets of paper on the large desk. "New list?"

"Right here," Yagari handed him a sheet, but before Zero could take it he pulled it back. "You're not going to school anymore?"

"I thought you knew," Zero sighed, annoyed.

"I wasn't sure. But Cross confirmed me that you really did quit school. What's up with that?" Yagari frowned.

"Nothing, who cares..." Zero said darkly, trying to take the list from him again.

"Wait! I want to talk to you for a minute, jeez!" Yagari sighed, "Are you that eager to go kill vampires? Oh, just forget I asked anything," he added when Zero glared.

"Look, I appreciate that you always encouraged me to go to school. But, this is my decision."

"All right..." he finally gave him the sheet. "Zero wait!"

He turned around, "What now?"

"Don't you want to wait for Kaito? I think he finishes his last class in thirty minutes..."

"No I'll be fine," he answered before walking away quickly, clutching the execution list in his hands.

He was cold and heartless that night, just like every night. He killed many pathetic level E vampires. Some of them were harder to kill, but still he didn't have any trouble finishing them off. They were mad and insane, and they always tried to jump on him to drink his blood. It was easy to just shoot them with his bloody rose. He was used to it by now. Murdering his own kind, he mused darkly.

He stopped when the night was almost over. It was probably about 4:30 am. With his hands in his pockets he walked aimlessly in the city, alone and feeling like a shadow in the cold and foggy night. He felt good. He always felt good after doing so many killings. He felt somewhat useful... he had a purpose. But it still wasn't enough. There was always something missing, something that made his heart sank every time he let his thoughts wander too much. That was also why he loved his job; it took his mind off things. Thinking was never good.

He suddenly clutched his neck, on the left side, where his tattoo was. It was a reflex more than anything; it always seemed to hurt when he craved blood. He felt like he was bleeding, losing blood but also losing his sanity. But nothing was happening, so why was his body suddenly going crazy with need for blood? He had taken his tablets as usual...

Suddenly his lilac eyes widened and almost turned red as he saw a lean and tall figure walk in the opposite direction on the sidewalk. Kuran Kaname. There was no mistaking it. Zero could smell his god damn blood even though he was still a few meters away. Zero tried to hold his head up, to keep what little dignity he had, and glanced away, holding his breath to try not to take in that delicious scent. Kaname was walking quickly, ignoring him in every way possible, and his perfect face expressionless. But when he passed him, Kaname deliberately hit him roughly on the side with his shoulder.

Zero growled and took out his gun to point it at Kaname. He knew he couldn't shoot him, but it was so tempting. To kill the man that had tortured his mind and body so many times.

"Still baring your fangs at me, huh Kiryu?" Kaname turned his head slightly and smirked, apparently amused, before resuming his walking as if nothing had happened.

The silver-haired vampire let out a frustrated sigh and put his gun back inside his jacket, closing his eyes and clenching his fists. Blood poured from his closed fists but he didn't even notice. He opened his eyes, ran a hand through his silver locks, dirtying them with blood in the process, and he started walking back home.

In his apartment, he swallowed his blood tablets shakily, and hopped in the shower for the second time that day. When he was done, he put on his sweat pants and collapsed on his bed. His body was sore; perhaps he had overdone it that night. Oh well, being a vampire had its advantages; his body always healed really fast. He checked his cell phone, and noticed he had a message from Kaito. Of course, no one else left him text messages. Yagari and Cross sometimes called him, but that was it.

It said, "Zero you douche you didn't even wait for me."

He rolled his eyes and didn't even bother answering him. He was afraid to go to sleep, though. Afraid that... weird dreams would come back to haunt him. Which made him think about Kuran. Why had he been out there anyway? What were the odds that they met each other randomly in the streets? He tried to stop thinking about it, and finally drifted to sleep. Thankfully, the next day, he couldn't remember any dreams.

xxx

The following days were pretty much all similar; except there were less level Es to kill on the lists. Zero was almost too efficient for the Association, in a way. Plus he didn't go to school anymore, so he would sleep in the day, and in the evening he always started doing his job as a hunter. He was aware that his habit of living in the night was very... vampire-like. But he couldn't help it.

Sometimes he worked with Kaito, sometimes he worked alone, but he always kept his cold and heartless facade.

About a week later though, the purebloods and nobles were throwing yet another freaking ball. They really liked those superficial and annoying events unfortunately.

Zero and Kaito were on guard that night, and of course Kaname and Yuki were there, although they were a little hard to see, with all those nobles pretending to be fawning over them. They thought they were all that, the nobles, but Zero mocked them really. They were just a bunch of pathetic hypocrite suck ups.

"Well, this is boring," Kaito commented, texting on his cell phone while glancing up once in a while.

"Yeah," Zero agreed.

He raised a fine brow as he saw Yuki trying to approach them. She kept being intercepted by other purebloods or nobles for some petty talk, but she eventually reached them.

"Hello Zero," she smiled, "how have you been?"

He glanced away, wondering why the hell she was talking to him. Couldn't she understand that he hated her now? She was a pureblood vampire, Kaname's sister at that, and probably lover too, however fucked up that was...

"Don't worry about him," Kaito told her, "you know he likes to be an antisocial bastard."

Yuki chuckled lightly, "I'm sorry to have bothered you then," she said but she didn't walk away.

As Zero glanced up he saw why. Kaname was behind her, with his pale hands on her frail shoulders.

"You seem tired Yuki," he whispered in her ear, but Zero heard anyway, "you should go back home with Aidou. He's waiting in the car outside."

"Okay," she turned and hugged him, "I'll see you later Kaname onii-sama," she kissed his cheek and walked away.

Kaname just stood there, staring at Zero. What the fuck was wrong with him? Couldn't he just go back to all of his stupid nobles kissing his ass?

"You're lucky she even talked to you," he said coldly.

Zero glared at the annoying pureblood, "Fuck off Kuran."

Kaito tensed beside him, and Zero admitted that this hadn't been the greatest idea; insulting a pureblood like that at a public event. But he just couldn't take it anymore. Kaname was so damn annoying...

"You want to kill me so bad, don't you Kiryu?" He leaned a little bit closer as he whispered those words, "But you can't. You're tied up by the hunters' lists, and you know I'll never be on it. How long will you pursue your useless and meaningless life?"

Zero's gaze didn't falter, and he kept looking straight into those reddish brown eyes, "You bored or something? Or you want me to feel so lucky that you're talking to me? Not gonna happen, so fuck off," he repeated, putting more emphasis on the last two words.

Kaname's eyes somewhat lit up, as if this was a game to him. "You should watch his mouth," he finally told Kaito very calmly, but it was all the more creepy.

He made a little mocking smile before walking away, going back to the more crowded area of the large ball room.

"What the fuck Zero? It's dangerous pissing those fucking purebloods off you know that," Kaito said, but it was without much conviction.

Kaito was used to Zero's careless attitude by now, actually, so he didn't really panic over it anymore. Kaname could be scary enough though. They were hunters, so of course the fact that purebloods were over powered was well known to them.

For once, the rest of the ball was peaceful and uneventful. Zero was actually a little disappointed. He would have loved to have an excuse to at least kill some vampires. But he noticed one thing; Kaname seemed a little nervous. It would have been hard to tell for anyone who didn't know him well, but Zero knew by heart his pretentious and superior expression. So he just knew that something was off by the way Kuran was looking around him suspiciously and a little alarmed. Not that Zero cared, anyway. But if this meant that something was going on between the purebloods, he wanted to know what it was...

He went home to sleep in the morning, taking his blood tablets beforehand as usual. He felt really thirsty these past few days - even more than usual. And it worried him. But what could he do about it? He had no one to ask for help. He had no one to talk to, or confide in. It had always been like this.

He had no idea why, but he felt somewhat uncomfortable when he remembered the look of uncertainty and uneasiness in Kuran's dark eyes...

TBC

So yeah, here it is, my first Vampire Knight fanfic, I hope it's any good..!